


Black Swan

by h34rt1lly (LILYisatig3r)



Series: Seiftis [3]
Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Depression, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Smut, F/M, Happy Ending, Minor Character Death, Seifer/Quistis, Seiftis - Freeform, Video & Computer Games
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2015-11-22
Packaged: 2018-03-29 05:59:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 111,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3885019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LILYisatig3r/pseuds/h34rt1lly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Three years after the second Sorceress War, everyone has settled into their lives, except for Quistis; bitter and green with envy, she spirals downwards into the depth of her regrets. With nothing to lose, she accepts a mission to Esthar, with an unexpected partner. There, her whole world is turned upside down. Emotions are sparked within her that she doesn't quite understand. Sometimes, you fall in love with the one you'd least expect.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Inception

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chance encounter with Seifer kicks off Quistis' downward spiral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! If you've found this story from my first FFVIII fic, The Journey Home, then welcome back! If you're new to my stories, that's even better! Happy to have you here :) So this first author's note is going to be a tad bit longer, just so I can clarify a few things.
> 
> This story is rated M for a reason - there will be strong language (because Seifer), and sexual themes (because Seiftis). However, I can guarantee that this story will not be 100% smut. I am a strong believer in allowing the story and the characters to carry the plot, rather than putting sex in every chapter. So if that's what you want, you won't find it here.
> 
> Next, the explanation for the title of this story. The definition of black swan theory that I found, states that it is an event that is an outlier (outside the realm of regular expectations), carries an extreme impact, and that afterwards, human nature dictates that we try to look back and rationalize the actions that caused the event to occur. As you read this story, the title will slowly begin to make more sense.
> 
> I always appreciate comments and subscriptions. I reply to every comment that I receive, because I love talking to my readers about what they thought of a particular chapter or an event within a chapter. Feel free to leave a note, if you enjoy the story.
> 
> Thank you to my beta-readers Arenoptara and StormyMonday, for polishing this chapter into something worth reading. Thank you to you, my readers for taking the time out of your day to stop by.
> 
> Lastly, Final Fantasy VIII does not belong to me, it belongs to Square-Enix (formerly Squaresoft). If you recognize it, I don't own it.

* * *

_**Inception** : beginning; start; commencement._

* * *

 

The hollow sound of Quistis' heel tapping against the metal rung of the bar stool echoed throughout the room. With every tap, the vibration pulsated through the bones in her leg and while it wasn't exactly a comfortable feeling, she appreciated the fact that she could still  _feel_. Considering the rest of her was pretty numb at the moment, the sensation was definitely welcome.

There were other things assaulting her senses currently, that most would find offensive. For starters, the particular bar she was at was relatively new, but it was already beginning to accumulate the stale scent of urine. Throw in the rancid smell of day-old vomit, and that was what Quistis was lucky enough to breathe in. The boisterous sound of drunken individuals surrounded her, and surprisingly, she welcomed the distraction. The more she concentrated on the problems of others, the less terrible her life seemed to be. Or at least, that's what she kept telling herself.

It had been three years since the defeat of Ultimecia. Since then, all of her friends had settled into their respective roles. Squall was Commander at Garden, and worked closely with Headmaster Cid on executive decisions concerning SeeD missions. Rinoa, of course, was beside him at all times and offered a third-party view when the Headmaster needed it. She'd never 'officially' become a SeeD, claiming she just wasn't cut out for the life of a mercenary. Frankly, Quistis agreed with the dark-haired optimist. Rinoa's heart was in the right place and she was too kind; the unforgiving tasks she'd be asked to do as a SeeD didn't mesh well with the type of person she was.

Selphie and Irvine, along with Zell, remained at Balamb Garden. Irvine could have returned to Galbadia, but after the corruption he'd seen in their military, he didn't feel any sort of loyalty to them in the slightest. Besides, as the sniper had said, "Where Sephy goes, I go!" Zell was still Zell: as rambunctious and energetic as he'd always been. Lately, Quistis had been spotting him in the Training Center more frequently. He claimed he was perfecting his moves, though he'd never explained exactly  _why_  he was so driven. Quistis suspected that he might be getting ready to apply for the Martial Arts Instructor position.

Matron had returned to the ruins of the orphanage on Centra, claiming that she wanted to rebuild the ruins of the home they had all shared in the past. Headmaster Cid couldn't exactly abandon Garden so he'd been forced let her return alone. Now that she was no longer a sorceress, she didn't have to hide who she was, and he wasn't worried about her wellbeing. However, that didn't mean he wasn't lonely without her by his side; Garden swung by the orphanage once a month to check up on her, as well as see how the orphanage was coming along.

As for Quistis herself, she'd been working as a SeeD in the interim, until she could apply to become an instructor again. Despite what Garden Faculty had thought when NORG was in command, she truly  _did_  love teaching. Being able to make a difference in cadets' lives and in their education, was something she'd taken great pride in. Yes, it had hurt when they'd taken her license away and claimed that she wasn't ready to be an instructor. At the time, she'd been bitter and had disagreed with their decision. During the events of the second Sorceress War however, she'd realized that they'd been right. She was so young then, so naive. Even during the past three years, she understood that she'd changed quite a bit. Now she knew, with absolute certainty, that she was ready once again, She just hadn't taken the last step in her application, which was to actually turn it in. There was a part of her that was terrified of failing again. The other part of her however, wanted to stand behind that desk, and to be called 'Instructor' again, more than anything.

So, she'd taken the elevator to the third floor this morning, to the Headmaster's office, to finally turn in her application. Today was the day her life would return to normal. When she'd gotten there though, Squall and Rinoa had been talking to the Headmaster.

* * *

_Quistis hesitantly stepped into the Headmaster's office, her eyebrows furrowed in apprehension. Rinoa and Squall were speaking softly to Cid, who was gazing at them, his eyes warm. When they heard her timid footsteps tapping on the carpet, Rinoa turned, her excitement nearly tangible in the air._

" _Quistis! I'm so happy you're here! We have news for everyone!" the raven-haired sorceress exclaimed, as she sprinted over to stand in front of Quistis, grasping her friend's gloved hands tightly._

" _Oh? News?" she replied, as she glanced at Squall. She was surprised to see a gentle smile on his lips. It was such a rare occurrence when he did smile, that whoever was witnessed it tended to stop in their tracks. Except Rinoa, since she was normally the cause of his more pleasant facial expressions._

" _Yes! We wanted to tell everyone all at once, but I just couldn't wait," Rinoa explained breathlessly._

" _It must be_ really _exciting then," Quistis commented warily. Rinoa was generally always upbeat, but her current level of excitement was borderline Selphie-like, which was a little frightening._

_Squall came up behind his sorceress then, and placed his hands on her shoulders, his black gloves a stark contrast to Rinoa's light-blue duster. "Just tell her, Rin," he whispered fondly._

_Rinoa glanced up at Squall, her eyes filled with adoration and love, and Quistis cringed inwardly at being the third wheel in this situation. Other than Headmaster Cid of course, who was still watching the exchange from his desk._

_When Rinoa's chestnut brown eyes finally returned to Quistis' vivid, crystalline ones, Quistis found that for some strange reason, her stomach dropped in anticipation of what Rinoa was about to say._

" _...I'm pregnant!" her friend blurted out, her voice brimming with happiness._

_Quistis' mouth dropped open and she tried to close it, only to find that it fell open again. She realized that she probably looked like a gaping Balamb Fish at the moment, gasping for air. Or maybe a Fastitocalon, in her particular case._

" _Wow, that's...amazing. Congratulations, you two," she mumbled, knowing that she didn't sound nearly as happy as she should have._

_Luckily, Rinoa was in such a cushioned bubble of elation, she barely even noticed Quistis' trepidation. She squeezed Quistis' gloved hands and threw yet another 'exciting' announcement out._

" _And...we're getting married! I want to be able to wear my mother's dress before I start showing, so I figure it'd be a good idea to do it sometime soon! I'm planning on asking Selphie to help me with organizing everything, but Quistis...I was wondering if...you'd want to be a bridesmaid too?" Rinoa asked, her tone of voice rising hopefully at the end of her spiel._

_Quistis' lips formed a surprised 'O' and she sputtered a couple of times, nonsensically, before she could reply. "I...would be honored!"_

_Rinoa's arms wrapped tightly around Quistis' torso, and the younger woman squeezed them in an excited hug, before she let her golden-haired friend go._

" _Yay! I'm so happy to hear that! I have to go find Selphie, but I'll come find you later so we can talk about stuff!" she exclaimed, as she grabbed Squall's hand and dragged him out of the Headmaster's office._

* * *

Quistis had watched them leave, speechless and shocked. The Headmaster had simply patted her on the shoulder sympathetically, before returning to his desk. She was happy for her friends; really, she was. But she couldn't help the wave of sorrow and loneliness that swept through her, as the wooden, double doors to the Headmaster's office had swung shut.

What felt like the fifth sigh of the night, escaped from Quistis' rosy lips. She raised her hand and waved at the bartender lazily, accepting the fact that she was probably going to be here for the rest of the night. She didn't normally drink. The training center was her stress reliever of choice but there'd been a handful of cadets in there earlier, working on their techniques for the upcoming field exam. Field exam dates were generally kept a secret and announced the morning of, to remind cadets anything could happen and that they should always be prepared. Somehow though, they always found out prior to the official announcement.

The bartender, a portly man who appeared to be in his mid-thirties, wandered over at Quistis' beckoning. His soothing, deep voice called out to her through the drunken haziness that was affecting her senses.

"What can I get ya  _now_?" Though his voice was warm, his attitude wasn't. Quistis supposed that came with experience in working at bars, which were almost always filled with less than respectable people.

"I'll have...whatever it was that I had before," Quistis mumbled, her words slurred.

He nodded and walked off, presumably to prepare her drink. She leaned back on the stool, her hands grasping the edge of the counter. As the muscles in her biceps flexed, she sighed again. The despair she felt permeated every breath she exhaled forcefully, and she wondered why she couldn't just be  _happy_  for Squall and Rinoa.

She knew Squall deserved this happiness, she'd always believed that he did. When she had still been his instructor, and even before as kids, she'd only wanted the best for him. The image of him broke her heart every time: his small frame, draped in that yellow striped shirt that he'd always worn, standing in the doorway of Edea's orphanage waiting for Ellone to return. She'd stepped in then, hoping to replace the 'Sis' he'd lost but he'd already begun to close himself off, reluctant to trust again. When she'd been adopted by the Trepes, she was sure that hadn't helped the situation, either.

Now, every time she saw the way he looked at Rinoa, a mixture of awe and pure devotion gracing his features, she was glad that he'd found the sorceress; no matter how difficult the path had been. That joy she felt for Squall was sadly tainted by jealousy. Was it really too much to ask for? Too much for the universe to give  _her_  a happy ending, too?

The bartender returned then, a square whiskey glass in his hand, the amber liquid swirling within its confines with every step he took. He placed it on a white paper napkin in front of Quistis, his gaze expectant. She waved her hand in the air dismissively. "Just put it on my tab. I'll be here for...a while, I think."

He nodded again, his shrewd eyes lingering on her as he turned to help other customers. He was a smart businessman, this bartender. Though he didn't know her personally, he could sense she'd had a rough day and was using it to his advantage. By the end of the night, probably twenty-five percent of the revenue he'd earn would come from Quistis herself.

She lifted the drink off the counter and raised it to her mouth, her lips pursed and ready to take a sip. As the cold, hard glass touched her skin, a voice she'd never expected to hear again, called out to her.

"Well, well, well...if it isn't the dear  _Instructor_  Trepe."

She froze, the masculine, husky tone drifting over her. His voice was as dry as she remembered, and still as hostile as the day she'd become his teacher. She steeled herself, stiffening her spine and setting the glass back down on the counter, before she swiveled the stool around to face him.

 _Seifer Almasy. My most troublesome student,_  Quistis thought bitterly to herself.

His striking cerulean eyes were in her direct line of sight, his eyebrows furrowed over them; he still towered over her at six foot two, but the bar stool was rather high, so she was able to look him directly in the eyes. The blonde, slightly disheveled locks of his hair were even longer now, the ends nearly grazing the top of his ears. They were brushed back from his face, but that single strand he'd never been able to tame still hung over his forehead. The puckered, angry scar that ran across his face between his eyes, mirroring Squall's, was still as intimidating as it had been three years ago-though Quistis had never fallen prey to his threatening aura. Time had weathered his features, hardening them from the still boyish looks he'd had when she'd last seen him, to the more defined lines of masculinity. He was also sporting a light dusting of blonde stubble.

The same, grey trench coat he always wore still engulfed his large frame. Its hem was tattered and torn now, the edges darkened by grime; why he still wore the old thing was beyond her. His hands were shoved into his pockets, his shoulders tense. Fujin's tiny silhouette and Raijin's hulking profile could be spotted hovering just behind him. As always, they hung back, ready for their leader's command.

 _I can't believe they're still following him around. Honestly…_ If Quistis could roll her eyes mentally, that's what she would be doing.

"Seifer. What an... _unpleasant_  surprise," she commented, the alcohol loosening her propriety, allowing her honest opinion of him to show its true colors.

Seifer's lips curled upwards in a sneer, and he distastefully said, "I would say you haven't changed Instructor, but frankly, I'm surprised to see you in a bar. I didn't think you even knew what these were."

"Ha,ha…," she trailed off, and spun around in an attempt to pointedly ignore him.

Unfortunately, Seifer knew her personality and so he sat down on the stool next to hers, making it his official mission of the night to annoy her as much as possible. Fujin and Raijin wandered off, after Seifer nonchalantly waved his hand at them, shooing them away. Quistis sighed again, though this time instead of despondency, it was saturated with annoyance. He'd always known the fastest way to push her buttons.

"So Instructor, it's been a while. What exactly drove you to the bottle, huh?" he asked sarcastically.

"You know full well that I'm no longer an instructor, Seifer. It was all thanks to you, as a matter of fact," she replied, her tone as frosty as Shiva's Diamond Dust.

Seifer scoffed in disbelief. When he spoke again, his words were laced with unbridled anger. "Is that what you tell yourself at night? It's easier to blame all the shit that goes on in your guys' lives on  _me_ , isn't it?"

"You know what, Seifer? This is  _my_  pity party. Go find your own."

"Nah, I think I'll stay right here. You're obviously enjoying my company. I'm surprised,  _Instructor_ -" Quistis cringed outwardly this time. He  _had_  to be doing that on purpose. "-You're like a completely different person when you're drunk. In fact, I think I could even say you're  _fun_."

"Ugh…" Quistis raised her momentarily forgotten glass swiftly to her lips, and swallowed the bitter liquid inside in one gulp. Seifer made a low sound of admiration that oddly, sent shivers down her spine. She shifted uncomfortably at the unexpected sensation.

"Wow, I'm impressed. Never expected  _that_  from you, Instructor."

Frustrated at his insistence on calling her 'Instructor' after she'd told him not to, Quistis quickly clambered off the stool, stumbling slightly at the sudden motion. The soles of her boots stuck to the floor; the aged, syrupy consistency of spilled alcoholic beverages impeded her ability to regain her balance.

"Enough, Seifer! I am  _not_  an Instructor, and you  _know_  it!" she exclaimed, as she swiped her arm through the air in a dismissive motion.

Seifer whirled around on his stool, his black glove grasping the edge of the bar tightly for support, as she'd done herself only a few minutes ago.

"I'm sorry  _Quistis,_ did I strike a nerve? Am I annoying you? Do you want me to _go_?!" he needled.

Her pale blue eyes narrowed and she planted her hands firmly on her hips in her signature pose. "Don't you dare pin this on me. I was here first."

"Wow, nice reasoning. That was something a five year old would say."

Quistis threw her hands up in the air as a sharp exhalation of air left her lips. She swiftly pivoted on her heel and stalked towards the door, fed up with his behavior and the fact that he'd interrupted her night. "By all means Seifer, take the bar. I'll simply go somewhere else."

Before she could reach the door, the bartender's throat clearing caught her attention. She froze and slowly turned around, facing the bar again. He was gazing at her expectantly and she trudged back over to him, scrounging in her pocket for Gil. She tossed a hundred casually onto the counter, not particularly caring that she just left a huge amount of money for the tip. She stalked back to the front door again, the feel of Seifer's heated gaze boring into the back of her head, as her boots sharply clicked against the concrete floor. The door flew open and banged against the outer wall due to her unnecessary force, and she stepped out into the warm, Balamb night.

Once the door had swung shut behind her, she took a deep breath, reveling in the sensation of the breeze rushing into her lungs. She closed her eyes and tried to regain the composure she was well known for having. After a few seconds of therapeutic breathing, she turned and started to head towards Balamb's front gate.

Now that she had time to reflect again, she found that thoughts of Seifer coursed through her mind, rather than of the day's events. What were the chances of seeing  _Seifer_  here, in Balamb, in the same bar she'd been at? Not only that, why had he decided to sit down next to her? He could've easily ignored her, choosing instead to walk back out. Because of her involvement in the war, she was easily recognized in both her civilian clothing and official SeeD uniform. Regardless of that fact though, Seifer would've recognized her even faster than a civilian would have. They had history, after all.

Was it because he was essentially still the same boy she'd known at Garden? Back then, he'd had a sarcastic comment ready to retaliate to every single thing she'd said to him. He'd always sought out ways to irritate her; pushing over piles of graded tests she'd had on her desk, speaking out of turn during her lessons, and making sure to come in late to class every, single, day. Was that what he'd been doing tonight when he'd sat down beside her and called her 'Instructor' at every opportunity?

She shook her head quickly, frustrated that she was even allowing him to haunt her thoughts like this. The past was over and done with, and none of them had anything to do with Seifer any longer. She'd seen him, they'd spoken briefly, and then she'd left. That was all tonight was. If word got back to anyone at Garden that they'd been seen together, that's exactly what she'd tell them.

The sound of her boots on the asphalt of the path that led back to Garden, echoed around her. The moonlight reflected off the surface of the ocean; a single white streak from the moon's reflection cut through the dark, almost black waves. The sand on the beach glowed a pale periwinkle, and even from where Quistis stood a few feet away, she could see the fineness of the grains. The rolling meadow that lay between Garden and Balamb surrounded her and the gentle breeze that drifted through the valley caressed the blades of grass, causing them to waver slightly. The two locks of hair that framed her face also swayed with the motion of the wind and she smiled fondly at the beautiful landscape.

The sights helped calm her and she walked the rest of the way back to Garden in silence. She normally rented a car or used one of the standard issued vehicles they had in the parking garage, but she knew she'd be drinking and had chosen to walk to town instead. Now, she was grateful for the decision she'd made because the walk was helping her sober up. She was human, so she didn't expect any of her friends to judge her for drinking her problems away. If they asked though, she'd have to explain  _why_  she'd chosen to get drunk and that was a conversation she didn't particularly want to have just yet.

Her thoughts started to drift back to what Rinoa had told her earlier and she shook her head fervently trying to rid herself of thoughts she knew would only send her spiraling downwards again. They all deserved happiness, and she was glad that Squall and Rinoa had found that in each other. She was happy for them,  _really_. She just needed to work on acting like it.

Seifer's face, with the long, harsh scar marring his features, which she had to admit didn't detract from his looks, popped into her head then. He'd always been handsome, even when he'd been younger. His broad shoulders were even more muscular than they'd been when he was eighteen, she'd easily noticed the contours of them through the strained fabric of his trench coat. The dry tone in his voice, that he'd had even as a teenager, had remained but it had deepened. It had become richer, more gravelly. It was...

 _Sexy...Oh Hyne, I need to stop,_  she thought frantically to herself, as she gripped her head with her gloved hands.  _It's just_ _ **Seifer**_ _. He hasn't changed, I haven't changed,_ _ **nothing**_ _has changed. Remember that, Quistis!_

That thought haunted her the rest of the way back to Garden, all the way up until she collapsed into her bed for the night. The last thing she saw in her mind, was the piercing turquoise shade of Seifer's eyes as she'd turned away from him at the bar.


	2. Declivity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quistis realizes that a lot of things may not be what she'd originally thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot express how grateful I am to LaylaEvercrest for her help with this chapter. The first draft was incredibly weak and I was pretty unsatisfied with it. Now however, I'm very happy with the final product. Also, thanks to StormyMonday as well for beta-reading :)
> 
> Enjoy.
> 
> P.S. In case it isn't clear, any full line that is italicized, is a thought. Single words that are italicized are emphasized by the speaker, whether internally or in dialogue.

* * *

_**Declivity:**  a downward slope, as of ground._

* * *

 

Golden rays of sunshine filtered into Quistis' room, gently warming her face as they spilled onto her bed. The sound of chirping birds just outside the window gradually increased in volume, their musical conversations permeating her subconscious. The more she regained consciousness, the more her head pounded. Normally, she enjoyed nature, both spending time in it and appreciating the sounds of it. But after last night, the noise was irritating and she groaned, tugging her pillow over her head. As she laid there trying to fall back asleep, her stomach rolled and she clenched her muscles in response.

"Ughhh," she grumbled, her voice muffled due to her face being smashed up against the bedsheets.

Quistis tried to ignore her stomach's somersaults, but a wave of nausea hit and her mouth started to water. Swiftly, she rose and scrambled into the adjoining bathroom, barely kneeling in front of the toilet before the contents of her stomach came back up. After dry heaving for a few minutes, she straightened and wiped the back of her hand across her mouth. A disgusted sigh left her lips and she leaned back, resting her weight on her calves.

 _This_  is why she rarely drank; she hated being sick and losing control over her own body. The shrill ringing of an alarm blared throughout her dorm and she cringed at the piercing sound. Slowly, she rose to her feet, the feel of the cold bathroom tile causing her to break out in goosebumps. She padded back into the bedroom, relieved at the change from tile to plush carpet, as she picked up the phone on her nightstand.

 _6:00 AM_.  _Back to the daily grind_ , she thought bitterly, a severe lack of enthusiasm saturating her thoughts.

She went through the motions of preparing for the day: she started off with a quick shower, avoiding washing her hair to save time, put her formal SeeD uniform on, and applied a light layer of makeup. Her hair went up in her trademark clip, so that the ends fanned out above her head. When she was finished, she looked into the mirror, inspecting her reflection. She grimaced at the sight of herself, with bloodshot eyes and major bags from a lack of a decent night's sleep.

Disgruntled, she turned away from the mirror and passed through her dorm, grabbing Save the Queen on her way out. She looped it around her belt hook, letting the door swish shut behind her.

The thought of being late forced Quistis to pick up the pace without appearing to be in a hurry. She hated being late, hated the way people stared at her as she was the last to enter the room. At that thought, her steps quickened and her boots tapped loudly on the tiled floor, as she rushed to the main area.

 _It's sad that I even know the trick to hurrying without_ actually _hurrying. I need a life._

When she finally entered the lobby, the sound of multiple water fountains throughout such a confined area caused an amplified echo, and made it seem as if the entire room was a rippling pond. The center of the ceiling was a glass dome which allowed an abundance of natural light to fill the room, and the benches that lined the lobby were almost always packed with cadets who were looking for a place to relax. Normally, she also took the time to admire the view; however, today was a different story. The eager chatter of cadets and instructors alike surrounded Quistis as she made a beeline for the stairs that led to the elevator.

She clambered up the steps, glancing around nervously to see if anyone had witnessed her behavior, and repeatedly jabbed the button to call the elevator. In an attempt to remain poised, she crossed her arms over her chest, wrapping them around her tiny frame. Rather than tapping her foot, she chose to tap her finger against the backside of her arm. Finally, the elevator reached the lobby and the doors opened with a  _ding._

Quickly, she stepped in and pressed '3F', and the doors slid shut. Quistis closed her eyes, praying that the elevator would go straight to the third floor without interruption but of course, the world was against her, because it stopped at '2F'. An exasperated sigh escaped her as she opened her eyes, to see Squall standing on the other side of the door.

"Why aren't you in the Headmaster's office?" she questioned.

He'd been looking at a paper on top of the large stack he held tightly within his gloved hand, but when he heard Quistis' voice, he glanced up at her. After he stepped into the elevator and the doors shut once more, they began to travel up to the third floor.

"Had to pick up something from Instructor Williams," he replied, his voice subdued and monotone. As always, he avoided making excessive eye contact, which usually made Quistis feel like she was talking to a wall.

"Ah, I see."

"I'm surprised to see  _you_ on the elevator," Squall commented.

Quistis tilted her head at him, causing the blonde locks of hair that framed her face to sway to the right. "Why would that be surprising? I do use the elevator too," she said defensively.

"I know. It's just that you're usually upstairs by the time I arrive."

"Oh, right. Well, I'm running a little...late today," she muttered. It was one thing to be late but to have  _Squall_  notice? Embarrassed, she let the conversation end and silence filled the space once again.

After what felt like eons, the elevator finally reached the third floor. When the doors opened, Squall strode out, heading straight for the Headmaster's office without so much as a farewell. Quistis rolled her eyes at his aloof behavior. Some people never changed.

She headed for her desk, which was one of the two that flanked the double doors leading to the Headmaster's office. Xu, who sat across from her at the other desk, hadn't arrived yet and Quistis reached over to turn her computer on, sinking into her chair. As she waited for the machine to boot up, she placed her elbows on the desk and covered her face with her hands. The motion was partially to cover up the light streaming in from the picturesque window behind her, but mostly it was an attempt to make her headache go away.

_If this is what a hangover feels like, I'm never drinking again._

While Quistis ruminated over the fact that her life had been reduced to drinking her sorrows away in a dive bar, the elevator mechanisms started whirring again and she glanced over to the doors, spotting Xu. Her friend stepped out of the elevator and headed her way. The carpet on the third floor was far nicer than anywhere else in Garden, and as Xu padded over to her desk, Quistis couldn't even hear her footsteps.

"Hey Quistis," the assistant headmaster called over to her friend as she sat down at her desk across the way.

Quistis cringed slightly at the sound of Xu's voice, and Xu raised an eyebrow questioningly at the older woman, her eyes wide. "Uh...are you...alright?"

The blonde shook her head in response, her chin propped up in her hands. The swaying motion made her nauseous again and she groaned quietly, causing Xu to raise an eyebrow at her.

"Quistis are you sick? If you don't feel well, why don't you go rest in your room for the day?"

"...I'm fine," she insisted.

"If you say so," Xu replied, as she sat down at her desk.

The rest of the day dragged on and by mid-afternoon, Quistis' headache had finally subsided. Large stacks of paperwork that had been flooding her inbox had dwindled down to approximately an inch in height, and she considered that a good place to stop. Shutting off her computer, she rose from her chair and grabbed a clipboard that needed to be taken to the Headmaster. The wooden, double doors creaked slightly when she pushed them open, confidently striding into the office. Squall and the Headmaster looked up at her when the sound of her footsteps interrupted their conversation and Cid straightened.

"Quistis, what is it?"

She held the clipboard out to the older man and he took it gently, his eyes scanning back and forth over the content. His eyebrows furrowed slightly as he passed it on to Squall, which caused Quistis to frown. Yes, Squall was the Commander of Garden, but that document had been for the Headmaster's eyes only. When she saw Squall's expression darken, she finally piped up.

"Headmaster, I need  _your_  signature on that form."

Squall's eyes quickly shot up to hers, his expression as hard as the metal his steel blue eyes resembled, and he handed the clipboard back to the Headmaster.

"Will you tell Xu that I need to speak to her?" Cid asked, as he scrawled his name across the line at the bottom.

"Of course, Headmaster," she acknowledged, taking the form from him.

"Quistis, you know you can call me Cid."

A small, exasperated sigh left Quistis' lips. "I know that, Headmaster. I'll tell Xu to come in."

The genuine smile on Cid's face fell slightly at her insistence but he nodded as Quistis turned and walked out of the office. As the doors shut behind her, she took the document out from under the clipboard's hinge, placing it in Xu's inbox. Her friend glanced up at her and Quistis said, "The Headmaster wants to see you."

"Why do you insist on calling him Headmaster and not Cid, like he wants you to?" Xu questioned.

"You heard that, huh?"

"Mmhm."

The blue mage crossed her arms and looked off to the side. "I guess...it helps me separate work from personal things. If I called him Cid all the time, I would be treating him like the father figure he  _thinks_  he is. By calling him Headmaster, it allows me to keep things compartmentalized," she explained.

"Do you  _need_  to compartmentalize everything, though?"

"...I don't really know," Quistis replied softly.

Perhaps Xu had a point. Cid had always been there for the six of them. Over the past decade, he'd aimed to be both a Headmaster and a father figure to them. What was the worst that could happen if Quistis let him in? Every orphan's fear was to be left behind, especially if they had multiple experiences with abandonment. That was by far, the top reason that Quistis was reticent to let her walls come down. Now, she understood why Squall had always pushed her away in the past, every time she'd nagged him to share his feelings.

Still, being the only one who ended up alone, when the rest of the group had found someone to share their lives with, left a bitter taste in Quistis' mouth. If she let  _Cid_  see who she really was underneath her guise of perfection, would it really be so bad? She couldn't help but wonder if, maybe it was time that she at least tried to let  _someone_  in.

* * *

A stack of papers thudded onto Quistis' desk and she gasped, as she jumped in her chair.

"Quistis. You've been working straight for a week. You need to get out, do something!" Xu insisted, her arms crossed.

"I enjoy working, you know that," Quistis said as she returned to staring at her computer screen. Who was she kidding? If she were an instructor again, then perhaps that would be true. But this type of menial work? She couldn't stand it. It was the type of work that made her thoughts drift a little too often, particularly to things she didn't want to think about.

The image of Seifer's face popped into her mind. Now that she was experiencing first hand what it was like to go through the motions of doing something you were entirely uninterested in, nor benefited you in the slightest, she could sympathize with him- maybe even understand him a little better. All those times he had to repeat the SeeD field exam because he hadn't been able to follow orders...perhaps it was because he was simply bored with the fact that it was the same thing, over and over again. It was repetitive because he was capable of far greater, which in turn, made him lash out and appear incompetent.

Xu's voice pulled her back into the present. "Oh please, Quistis. You enjoy working but not like this. You're pushing yourself  _way_  too hard. Even  _you_  need to take a break," her friend pushed.

"I don't need to take a break."

"...Ugh."

* * *

The sun was beginning to set, casting a dark, orange glow on the furniture in the room. Deep shadows extended beyond the edges of Quistis' desk, along with the other objects in the room, making it seem later in the day than it actually was. The warmth from the last rays of the sun caressed her neck, causing her to feel lazy and far more comfortable than she should be at the moment; she still had a large pile of work to get through before she could call it quits for the night.

The doors to the Headmaster's office quickly shot open and Xu scampered out, her arms filled with paperwork. She rushed around the corner of her own desk, setting the papers down rapidly, causing them to scatter across the surface. A short sigh left her lips and she tried to sweep them back up into an organized pile and Quistis stood and walked over to her friend's desk.

Quietly, the blonde tried to help Xu, who was obviously in quite a rush. When the papers were neatly stacked again, Xu brushed a stray lock of her brown, shoulder-length hair behind her ear.

"Thanks, Quistis."

"You're welcome. Where are you off to in such a hurry?" she asked.

" _I_  have a hot date," Xu replied, her eyebrow raised suggestively.

"Oh. With whom?"

"Nida."

"...Nida? Wait,  _our_  Nida?"

"How many Nidas do you know?" Xu joked.

"Uh, I guess just the one. Nida, though? Seriously?"

Xu crossed her arms defensively. "What's wrong with Nida?"

"Nothing's wrong with him, I'm just...surprised. It didn't seem like the two of you spoke much."

"We don't. He asked me out yesterday, when I went into Cid's office to have some paperwork signed. Nida was getting ready to head up to the control deck. He's cute, so I figured why not?"

"I wish I could be as spontaneous as you," Quistis mused.

"Well you  _can_. You just turn down every guy that asks you out."

"The only people who ask me out are Trepies, Xu."

"What's wrong with them?"

"Are you kidding? I don't want to date someone who's in my  _fan club_ ," Quistis said, her tone dry in disbelief.

"Well at least they're guaranteed to love you."

"That's so not right," she muttered, as her friend laughed behind her hand.

When Xu turned and grabbed her bag, Quistis wandered back to her desk and started to sit down, until Xu hurried back over to her. She froze, her body poised above her chair, and looked up at her friend questioningly.

"Quistis, just come with us."

"I'm sorry?"

"I'm sure Nida wouldn't mind. We'll find someone else to bring, and it'll be a double date!"

"Uh, that sounds...like a  _terrible_  idea," Quistis said quietly, shaking her head. One, she didn't want to be the third wheel. Two, if Xu did manage to find someone to pair up with Quistis, Hyne knew it  _would_ probably be a Trepie and honestly, she just didn't want to deal with that. They'd fawn over her the entire night and claim that she was the ideal woman-'everything I've ever dreamed about!'- when she was far from perfect.

"Come on! You've been holed up in your room and this office for the past couple of  _weeks_! You obviously didn't take my advice last week when I told you to unwind."

"I don't want to go on an impromptu date, Xu. I'd rather be able to prepare and I don't know, go out with someone I'm interested in."

"Fine. Suit yourself. But I  _will_  get you out of this office, if it's the last thing I do," Xu threatened in a low voice.

Quistis waved her hand in dismissal, and her fingers quickly flew across the keyboard once again. Xu huffed in annoyance as she left, the elevator whirring loudly as it returned to the first floor. A few minutes passed as Quistis tried to concentrate on the rest of her work, but eventually, she realized it was pointless. Xu's comment had stuck and she sighed in frustration as she shut off her computer for the night.

Slowly, she stood and trudged over to the elevator as well. Lost in her thoughts, she was barely aware of her surroundings as she traveled through the peaceful lobby to her dorm at the far end of the hall.

Even  _Xu_  had regular interaction with the opposite sex. Granted, Xu had always been very aggressive in her intentions. If someone were to look up the definition of 'assertive female' in the dictionary, a picture of Xu would be there. Quistis couldn't exactly fault her friend in that aspect. While she herself could also be considered assertive, it was in a different way. Quistis always knew what the end goal would be, in any situation; become an Instructor, concentrate on being the best SeeD she could be, protect the world, save the world, rebuild. Now however, she just couldn't seem to find the guts to take the final step to achieve what she really wanted.

After she walked into her dorm's living area, the door silently slid shut behind her, trapping her in darkness. She sunk down onto the soft cushions and pulled her boots off, annoyed at how snugly they fit. Normally she appreciated the way they hugged her calves like a second skin, but at this moment in time, she just wanted everything off.

When the heavy soles finally thudded onto the carpeted floor, she rose and traipsed into her bedroom, flipping the light on and shedding her SeeD uniform. After pulling on a pair of black leggings and a salmon-pink sheer tank top, she crouched in front of her closet and pulled a cardboard box out, cringing slightly at the way its base scratched roughly against the carpet. She opened the top and stared at the contents: a photo album of her time with the Trepes, an old, nearly crumbled flower from the field behind the orphanage, and her original weapon, the Chain Whip. She'd kept it as a memento, even though she currently used her Save the Queen whip.

She kept the box as a reminder of who she'd been in the beginning, so that she could compare it to how far she'd come. With yet another sigh, she rose again and swiftly padded over to where she'd left her uniform crumpled on the floor near the bedroom door. In her right pocket was a crumpled piece of paper. She gently pulled it out and returned to the box, folding her legs underneath her so that her thighs rested on her calves. The paper had seen better days; it had been folded and unfolded multiple times, causing the edges to become soft and worn.

Gingerly, she unfolded it for what felt like the hundredth time. With her eyebrows furrowed and her azure eyes dark with sorrow, she gazed down at the piece of paper in her hand. Slowly, she traced her fingertip along the lines that ran horizontally across it.

_Name: Quistis Trepe._

_Birthdate: October 4th._

_Occupation: SeeD, rank A._

_Position that you are applying for: Instructor._

_Have you had prior experience? Yes._

At the memory of losing the one thing she'd been passionate about, she closed her eyes tightly, as her fingers curled around the paper in her hand. She'd  _loved_  being an instructor, loved making a difference in young cadets' lives. Other instructors hated grading papers, making lesson plans...but Quistis had revelled in all of the mundane tasks that had come with the job.

Until Seifer.

The mental image of the blonde gunbladist flashing through her mind, sent a fresh wave of bitterness rolling through Quistis and her lip curled up in distaste. When he'd been placed in her class, every day had been an extreme challenge. He had tested her patience at every turn and made her question whether she was truly cut out for the job. Apparently, Garden faculty under NORG had picked up on her lack of experience and stripped her of her position. Now that she could reflect on it clearly, she knew that it wasn't  _just_  Seifer's fault that she'd lost her license-he was just the catalyst. Still though, he worked well as a scapegoat for her anger, so that's what she'd continue to use him for.

It just wasn't fair. Out of all of them,  _Seifer_ was the one she was most envious of. Regardless of the fact that he'd nearly destroyed the world and that everyone on the planet despised him, he always had Fujin and Raijin. Their undying loyalty to the man was beyond natural. Why, after everything that Seifer had done, was he the one who had what Quistis desired most?

With what felt like the upteenth sigh of the day, Quistis hesitantly placed the application inside her box of memories, her fingers lingering on it. In a brash moment of decisiveness, she clumsily closed the top, and shoved it back into the dark depths of her closet. She hastily slid the closet door shut and rested her forehead against it. A shaky breath escaped from her, and her eyes firmly closed once more.

A single tear escaped from underneath her eyelashes as she sat there in her bedroom, for yet another night alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, leave a comment if you liked it ;)


	3. Departure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two friends say goodbye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Here's an update sooner than I'm sure many of you expected.
> 
> Thank you to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading, and helping me transform my chapters into writing that I'm proud of. 
> 
> Sorry this chapter is a bit on the short side.

* * *

_**Departure:** an act or instance of departing; to go away, leave;_

* * *

The mundane conversations from the cadets and faculty members surrounded Quistis, as she walked to the group's usual booth in the far corner of the Cafeteria. Breakfast hour tended to get rather crowded, so they liked to arrive early to try to bypass the line. Unfortunately, policy stated that SeeD members did not get priority treatment, much to their annoyance.  _"In Garden, we're all equal beings!"_ according to the Headmaster.

Most, if not all of the cadets, recognized her when she passed by. Some greeted her verbally, while others would wave, and Quistis tried to nod politely at all of them in return. A large majority of the students would start whispering amongst themselves and she cringed at being treated like a celebrity. It was the same reaction everywhere she went. Of course, it wasn't only Quistis that experienced this; the entire group had to put up with it.

As she wandered through the room, gracefully weaving around tables and chairs, the sweet scent of powdered sugar wafted through the air-apparently, the cook had decided on french toast for today's breakfast. Quistis' stomach rumbled loudly and she pressed her gloved hand into her abdomen, in an attempt to stifle the embarrassing sound. She rounded the last potted plant and when Selphie caught sight of Quistis, she stood up on the booth's seat and waved her arms excitedly through the air.

"QUISTY! Over here!"

Quistis smiled and slowly shook her head. Even though the group always sat at the same booth whenever they got together, Selphie still felt the need to throw up her own personal version of a neon sign-top volume level announcement included. Quistis finally reached the table and slid into the booth, next to Rinoa. Everyone else was already there, except for Zell; he tended to eat breakfast even earlier than they did. The gang preferred to have their morning meal a few hours after the sun rose, but Zell was far too dedicated to training to sleep in.

The onyx-haired sorceress turned to Quistis with a gentle smile on her face. She had just announced her pregnancy to the group, the morning of the night that Quistis had gone to the bar in Balamb and bumped into Seifer. Regardless of the fact that she was probably only a month into her nine-month 'sentence', she already seemed to be glowing. Then again, maybe she always had, and Quistis had simply never noticed.

"It's been awhile since you've stopped by, Quistis," Rinoa commented softly.

Quistis smiled hesitantly and in an attempt to make up a solid excuse, said, "I know. I...I've been kind of feeling under the weather lately."

Rinoa's eyebrows furrowed and her warm eyes narrowed slightly, as she laid her hand on Quistis' shoulder. "You don't have to lie to  _us_ , Quisty. If you've been down lately, you can just say so."

The blue mage tilted her head down, tucking her chin into her chest. While she appreciated the gesture and her friends' concern, she didn't feel like now was the time or the place to go into detail. She gently placed her hand over Rinoa's and squeezed lightly.

"I know, Rinoa. Thank you. Maybe later, okay?"

Irvine and Selphie were on the other side of the booth and Irvine had his long arm draped over Selphie's slender shoulders. A little belatedly, Quistis realized that Squall was also missing from the gathering.

"Where's Squall?" Quistis questioned.

At the mention of her knight's name, Rinoa's eyes lit up. The corners of her lips curled upwards in a smile and she rested her chin on the heel of her palm. She gazed off into space wistfully and in a soft voice said, "Oh he's probably working. I always tell him to take breaks and come join us but he ends up complaining that he has a huge pile of stuff to do."

Quistis chuckled shortly. "That sounds like Squall."

"Well he needs to hurry! I have something to tell you guys, but I wanna tell everyone at once!" Selphie exclaimed impatiently. Irvine nipped the top of her ear gently with his fingers, in a slight reprimand, as he smirked at her.

"Zell isn't here either, so you'll end up repeatin' yourself anyway, Sephy," Irvine reminded the brunette.

"Ugh!" Selphie complained.

Quistis heard the light patter of multiple footsteps approaching and when she looked up, she spotted Squall and Zell. Squall was scowling, as always, and Zell was energetically prancing over to them. Quistis slid out of the booth and stood, so that Squall could sit next to RInoa and the Commander nodded gratefully. He and Rinoa were nearly always joined at the hip and Quistis figured that while Rinoa was pregnant, that would probably increase tenfold.

Quickly, she dragged two empty chairs over from the table nearby, and her and Zell sat down at the end of the booth, facing the rest of the group. Once they were settled, Rinoa straightened in her seat and looked expectantly at Selphie.

"Well, we're all here! What's your big news, Sephy? Is it as exciting as ours was?" the sorceress teased, as her dark, slender eyebrows wiggled up and down suggestively.

Irvine coughed into his hand, as he tipped his hat down over his face. The brunette SeeD blushed at Rinoa's implication and said, "No, no, nothing like that! Anyway uh...well...you guys know how much I love Trabia, right?"

A round of nods ensued.

"So uh...I guess they've been working on rebuilding since the missiles hit a few years ago, and things are going  _pretty_ slowly. The thing is, without someone to coordinate repairs and stuff, it's been dragging on and on and on…" Selphie trailed off.

"We get the idea, Selphie," Squall prompted.

"Right! So they contacted me and asked me to come back...and be their coordinator…"

"And you said?" Quistis asked.

"...I said...yes!" Selphie replied, her verdant eyes wide and hopeful.

Cheers and congratulations were thrown Selphie's way by the rest of the gang, but Quistis's heart lurched. Selphie would be the first person in their tight-knit circle to leave Garden and pursue their own endeavors. Quistis was happy for Selphie of course; Trabia was Selphie's home and she'd never made that a secret. But the blonde was afraid that once Selphie left, the rest of them would scatter as well.

Selphie's quiet voice interrupted her thoughts. "Quisty?"

She blinked, coming out of her reverie, and looked back up, meeting Selphie's gaze. Her friend's forehead was creased with concern, and Quistis tried to put what she hoped was a convincing smile on her face. "I'm happy for you Selphie. I know how much you've been wanting to help Trabia rebuild."

"Yeah, I always felt so bad that I pretty much abandoned them. I mean, you guys are my family too, but Trabia is my home."

"Hey, don't worry about it, Selph! We'll hold down the fort while you're gone!" Zell reassured her.

A sly smile slowly crept across Selphie's face and she tilted her head down to look up at Zell, from underneath her eyelashes. She batted them quickly at the martial artist and Zell leaned back, squeezing his eyebrows together as his mouth fell open slightly at her sudden change in behavior.

"Uh…" the martial artist mumbled nervously.

"Does that mean  _you'll_  take care of running the Festival Committee, Zell?" Selphie asked, her voice high and innocent.

"Oh no. No, no, no. You don't think that was me  _offerin'_  do ya?!"

"Well, you  _did_ say you'd 'hold down the fort', didn't you?" Squall asked dryly.

"I said WE.  _WE_!"

"Thank you Zell! I feel so much better knowing that you'll be watching over  _everything_ for me!" the brunette cried, as she scrambled over the table. Her arms wrapped around Zell in a fierce hug and he winced at her strength. For such a small woman, she had an awful lot of power.

Quistis and Irvine chuckled to themselves at the fact that Selphie had somehow managed to coerce Zell into taking over the Committee. Their eyes met across the table and Quistis tilted her head at Irvine in curiosity.

"So will you be going too, Irvine?" she asked softly.

"Where Sephy goes, I go."

Her sky blue eyes lowered and she nodded slowly before muttering, "I thought as much."

Frankly, Quistis was jealous. Selphie had always been passionate about rebuilding Trabia. Actually, it was probably more accurate to say that she was passionate about everything. That was why so many people loved her. She put her entire heart and soul into every activity, every promise. That included Irvine. Their sheer dedication to each other was astounding, especially since Irvine took every opportunity to flirt with any female that walked past. While it drove Selphie crazy, at the end of the day, she knew Irvine was faithful to her.  _That_  was what Quistis was so jealous of. The unspoken promise of companionship that would always be there.

_Even Seifer, of all people, has that,_ Quistis thought indignantly to herself, as the memory of their meeting at the bar flashed through her mind.

Rinoa, sensing that Quistis might not be handling the news as well as Selphie had hoped, piped up then. "So when do you guys head out?"

Selphie straightened, finished with physically torturing Zell, and said, "In a week! I've just gotta pack everything up. I was hoping you guys could help?"

"Of course! We're free now, right Quistis?"

"Oh uh...yes, I suppose so."

* * *

**One week later.**

The deafening roar of Ragnarok's engine jets powering up blasted through the meadow, and Quistis cringed slightly from the sheer power the ship exuded. The wind gusts chaotically twisted the blades of grass in the plains, and whipped the blonde strands of Quistis' hair around her face. She brushed her bangs back behind her ear, in an attempt to keep them at bay but due to the gale, they refused to stay put. A sigh left her and it was quickly swallowed up by the thunderous sound of the airship.

Selphie and Irvine were setting off for Trabia Garden today, and they'd all gathered outside of Balamb Garden to bid them farewell. In true Selphie fashion however, she was late to her own send off. Quistis crossed her arms and leaned up against the wrought iron fence that marked the Garden's entrance. Irvine paced back and forth, while Zell practiced his moves off in the far corner, near the entrance to the parking garage. Rinoa was sitting on the steps and Squall chose to remain standing, just to the side of his sorceress. His foot tapped impatiently on the stone pathway, and Quistis giggled at the stoic Commander showing his emotions so freely. Normally, he was off in the opposite corner from Zell, scowling at everything.

"Hey, there she is!" Zell exclaimed as he pointed back through the gate, and the whole group turned to look towards the academy.

Selphie could be seen off in the distance, multiple bags looped around her arms as she sprinted to the front entrance. Irvine paused in his effort to wear grooves into the cement, and shook his head while he watched her run towards them. Finally, she reached the top step and came to a stop just beside Quistis, bracing her hands on her knees, panting as she caught her breath.

"Sorry...guys...I...slept in," she explained, in between large gasps of air.

"I kind of figured, Sephy. Good thing we're not in any rush right?" teased Irvine.

"Speak for yourself. I have a meeting this afternoon," Squall complained from below the steps, his voice quiet. Rinoa elbowed him in the ribs for his lack of tact, and the Commander let out an 'oomph'.

"It's fine, Selphie. We  _really_ aren't in any rush," the darker-haired brunette assured.

Selphie's face scrunched up and she set all of her bags down next to her on the cement. "I really am sorry! I tried to hurry, I swear."

Irvine climbed the steps and gathered Selphie's bags in his longer arms. He straightened and headed for the Ragnarok, turning to say over his shoulder, "I'll go load this stuff up."

Selphie nodded at the cowboy's retreating back and shuffled her feet in place. None of them were very skilled at saying goodbye, and Selphie could probably be classified as the worst. Quistis, deciding to take the first step, pushed off of the iron gate and trudged over to the perky brunette, raising her arms up in an invitation. Tears welled in Selphie's viridian eyes and she ran into Quistis' arms, nearly knocking the blonde over. Quistis gently ran her hand up and down Selphie's back, as the younger woman sobbed into her shoulder.

"Selphie...goodbyes aren't forever," she said softly.

"But...Trabia is... _so_  far! And...I'll...miss you guys," Selphie sputtered, as sobs interrupted her words.

"I know. We'll miss you too," the blue mage replied.

Rinoa's eyes started to water as well and she hastily ascended the steps, wrapping both Quistis and Selphie up in her arms. "We'll come visit, Sephy! All the time!"

"You better! Once a month, okay!? I want to see your belly grow!" Selphie demanded, as she straightened and wiped the tears from her cheeks.

Squall walked up to them as well and said, "Once a month might be hard. But we  _will_  visit."

Selphie turned and tried to glare at Squall, but she started crying again instead, which caused her expression to scrunch up in an extremely unattractive way. She ran over to the dark-haired gunbladist, one of the many people she'd always looked up to,  _their_  Commander, and squeezed him tightly in one of her infamous hugs. Squall tensed at the sudden physical contact but eventually, he hesitantly placed his hand on Selphie's upper back, patting it in an attempt to awkwardly comfort her.

She leaned back and gazed up at Squall, her lips curling upwards in a smile.

Zell yelled up at her from the sidewalk, "Hey, don't  _I_ get a hug?!"

Selphie giggled and let Squall go, racing down the steps to jump on Zell. She looped her arms around his neck and he swung her around, laughing the entire time. Quistis shook her head as she watched them; they'd always been the two most rambunctious of the group.

As Zell set Selphie back down on the sidewalk, Irvine's voice drifted over to them. "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were tryin' to steal my girl, Zell."

Zell blushed and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. "No, I-"

"I'm kidding. I know Sephy better than that," the taller man jokingly interrupted the martial artist, as he held his arm out for his girlfriend. She skipped over to him and placed her arm around his back, and the two of them looked back at their friends.

"Well. I guess this is it," Irvine said quietly. Selphie's eyes started to water again at his final statement and she wiped her cheeks again, with the back of her hand.

"You guys know where to find us. I expect to see everyone  _once a month_ , Squall!" she threatened.

Squall simply shook his head in response, as he walked towards the Ragnarok. "It seems like you're forgetting that I have to drop you off."

"Oh yeah!" Selphie said.

Quistis placed her finger on her temple as she too shook her head at the brunette's forgetfulness. A smile spread across her face as she watched the trio walk towards the airship, and a wave of sadness rushed through her. Trabia wasn't far, as her friend had stated, but it did mean that they would no longer be together, in the same place. She wouldn't be able to see Selphie at breakfast, she couldn't head over to her room for a chat in the late evening hours, and she wouldn't have anyone to pester her about Garden Festival ideas. Ironically, as much as Selphie had annoyed her about the Festival, she realized that'd been one of her favorite things about the brunette.

When Selphie turned and waved at them, Quistis, with unbidden tears rising in her eyes, returned the gesture, and tried to memorize the sight of one of her closest friends before she walked out of their lives. Rinoa came up to Quistis and leaned her head on the blonde's shoulder, linking their arms together.

"I'm going to miss her," the sorceress whispered.

"I think we're all going to miss her," Quistis quietly agreed.

"She's just so…" Rinoa trailed off.

"Spunky," Zell finished, a wistful expression on his face. The girls giggled softly and Quistis nodded; spunky defined Selphie perfectly.

The Ragnarok rose swiftly into the air, and the trio on the ground could hear the sound of the jets powering up, even from the Garden's front gate. When the airship had reached full clearance, the sonance of the engine reached a feverish pitch and the dragon-shaped vessel darted off into the distance, leaving trails of white, fluffy smoke behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Awww, bye Selphie & Irvine :( Cookie for a review? :3


	4. Dissonance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quistis comes down with the flu, realizes she unintentionally ignored Selphie for a few months, and Rinoa stops by to cheer her up...only it doesn't quite work out that way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beginning of this chapter is formatted as emails :) This chapter was so much fun to write! Again though, this one is rather short, sorry. Gearing up for the monstrous chapter five!
> 
> Much thanks to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest, my betas. Thanks to PuPu_Rin & Arenoptara for bookmarking and for the kudos!

* * *

_**Dissonance:** disagreement or incongruity._

* * *

**Recipient: Quistis Trepe [ qtrepe at bgarden dot com]**

**From: Selphie Tilmitt [** **chocobos_are_fluffy at tgarden dot com** **]**

**Date: January 7th**

**Subject: TO QUISTY!**

_Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!_

_Ah, it's been so long, Quisty! How are you? How is everyone?!_

_Brrr, Trabia's cold! I mean, I always knew that it was cold, but now that I have to live here again, it's FREEZING._

_The repairs are coming along! We've had meetings and stuff and everything is kind of falling into place, so it's been great. Right now we're fixing up our Quad so we can get the Trabia Garden Festival going! Do you have any ideas for what we should do for our first one?! You should ask Rinoa, too. I bet she'd have tons of good ideas._

_Speaking of Rinoa, how's her belly?! Is she HUGE yet?_

_Reply super fast, 'cuz I miss you guys!_

* * *

**Recipient: Quistis Trepe [ qtrepe at bgarden dot com]**

**From: Selphie Tilmitt [** **chocobos_are_fluffy at tgarden dot com** **]**

**Date: March 3**

**Subject: YAY BIRTHDAYS!**

_Are you guys doing anything fun today? It's Rin's birthday, right?! How big is her belly now? Seriously, I keep asking you guys for pictures and NO ONE sends me anything…I wanna stay in the loop, too!_

_Anyway, Rin's birthday. Is Squall doing something super adorable? How's her wedding planning going?_

_Quisty, you never replied to my last email. You're not ignoring me, are you?! ARE YOU?!_

_Email me back. I wanna know all the things!_

* * *

**Recipient: Quistis Trepe [ qtrepe at bgarden dot com]**

**From: Selphie Tilmitt [** **chocobos_are_fluffy at tgarden dot com** **]**

**Date: April 15**

**Subject: …**

_Quistis._

_Are you alive? I haven't heard from you since the day I left. You're still there, right?_

_Rebuilding is going super well. We finished the Quad last week and I'm starting to put together details for our festival. You never got back to me about ideas...yours are always so good :( I mean, the last one at Balamb was amazing!_

_Anyway. I really miss you guys. I made Squall promise to come visit once a month and I haven't seen anyone yet...Please come visit?_

_And email me back! D_

_Love,_

_Super angry Selphie._

* * *

_Ping!_

Quistis' large, fluffy down comforter was pulled up over her head, and tucked tightly around her body. No matter how high she turned up the temperature, or how many layers she wore, her body was still racked with massive shivers. She'd come down with the flu recently and was having an incredibly hard time kicking the virus. For that, Dr. Kadowaki had assigned her to bed rest for a week. Quistis was going insane from the lack of work, social interaction, and too much of her own company.

_Ping!_

The blonde groaned and rolled over in bed, braving the chilly air of her bedroom -or at least, chilly to her- to reach out and grab her phone off of her nightstand. She was temporarily blinded when she unlocked the screen; the white glow of the phone's screen shone straight into the back of her eyes. The little envelope icon showed three new notifications and Quistis tapped the screen, opening up the program.

_**Three**_ _messages from Selphie? When did those come through?_  she thought, irritated at the fact that her phone had failed to let her know sooner. Then again, maybe it was user error.

When she opened the first email from Selphie, she sighed at the date; it was from three months ago. She quickly read through the correspondence, then the next one, and finally opened another from just two days ago. Her fingers flew across the virtual keyboard as she typed a response, feeling horrible for unintentionally ignoring one of her closest friends.

* * *

**Recipient:** **Selphie Tilmitt [** **chocobos_are_fluffy at tgarden dot com** **]**

**From:** **Quistis Trepe [ qtrepe at bgarden dot com]**

**Date: April 17**

**Subject: Apology?**

_Selphie,_

_I am so incredibly sorry that I haven't replied to any of your emails. I recently came down with the flu and before that, I was swamped with work. I know that it seems like I'm just throwing excuses at you, but I promise I haven't been ignoring you- at least, not on purpose._

_We're all doing fine. Squall is busy as always, and Xu and I are left to clean up his paper trail. I'm surprised at how terrible he is at filling out the required forms. It's a little ridiculous._

_Zell was accepted as a martial arts instructor finally, so he took over Instructor Williams' position. He was pretty excited._

_Rinoa is showing now; she's around four months along. I believe she just passed into her second trimester last week? Maybe the week before. Not entirely sure. Why don't you email her? Her email is [ angelwing33 at bgarden dot com ]._

_I'll talk to Squall about maybe visiting you sometime soon. Like I mentioned, he_ _**is** _ _busy right now, so I'm not sure what he'll say. Actually, you might have more luck asking Rinoa to ask Squall._

_Again, sorry I ignored you. I just got a new work phone and am barely figuring it out. I promise I'll reply on time from now on. Miss you too._

_\- Quistis._

* * *

Quistis set her phone down next to her head, task completed, and pulled the covers up under her chin again. She knew that she should probably get up and try to do something, but her body ached. Sickness rarely affected her, but when it did, it hit hard. Her phone vibrated again and she groaned, before reaching for it once more. A message from Rinoa popped up on the screen and before she had a chance to read it, a knock sounded on her door.

"Quisty, are you doing alright? I'm coming in, okay?" Rinoa's muffled voice drifted through the room.

The door to the main living area whooshed open and Rinoa hesitantly stepped inside. It was impossible to see anything, since the entire dorm room was flooded with darkness. Quistis hadn't left her bed in what felt like years, and thus, hadn't bothered to turn on any of the lights.

"Quistis?" her friend called out, her voice timid. The sound of shallow, panting breaths also drifted into the room, which meant that Rinoa had probably brought her trusty sidekick along.

"In here," the blonde croaked, her voice raspy. When was the last time she'd even said anything? She sounded like a ninety-year old woman.

Rinoa walked into the room and spotted Quistis hiding under the covers, her normally flawless blonde hair in complete disarray. "Oh, you look terrible! Have you taken any of the medication Dr. Kadowaki gave you?"

Quistis shook her head in response, not daring to speak any further. With her motherly instincts already showing, Rinoa came up to the bed, and leaned over to place the back of her hand against Quistis' forehead. Her eyebrows furrowed in concern and she straightened, placing her hands on her hips. Angelo shuffled along after her owner, sitting at attention at the end of the bed, her shrewd eyes inspecting Quistis.

"You're really warm. I think you should take your meds," her friend suggested, concern coloring her every word.

The blue mage snaked her arm up and over the comforter, trying to keep as much warmth inside as possible, and pointed to an orange bottle on a shelf on the opposite side of the room. Rinoa went back into the kitchen and returned with a glass of water, pausing to grab the medication on her way back. When she handed them to the blonde, she gazed down at her friend pityingly and Quistis shook her head as she said, "I'm fine, really. You don't need to be so concerned."

A doubtful expression flashed across Rinoa's face as she countered, "You don't  _sound_  fine. We've all been really worried about you."

Quistis sat up and quickly swallowed two pill capsules, subsequently guzzling half of the water in the cup. She winced at the feeling of the pills creeping down her throat. A trickle of water escaped from her mouth and she quickly ran the back of her hand across her lips.

"I really am okay, Rinoa. One or two more days in bed, and I'll be back to normal."

"Hmm," the sorceress hummed, completely unconvinced.

In an attempt to change the subject, Quistis gestured to Rinoa's ever-expanding stomach. "So, how are  _you_ feeling?"

Gently, Rinoa rested her hand above her burgeoning baby bump, a soft smile gracing her features. "I'm good. The morning sickness is finally gone, for the most part."

Quistis laughed quietly and said, "That's good to hear. How's the wedding planning coming?"

The younger woman sighed as she looked away towards the other side of the room. "Okay, I guess? I really wanted to get married before I started showing but obviously, it's a little late for that now. Squall and I decided that having the wedding after the baby is born would be best, so our little boy or girl can be there too, you know?"

"Yeah, that does sound nice," she wistfully responded, as her eyes lowered and she picked at a loose thread on the comforter.

Rinoa reached out and placed her hand on top of Quistis', prompting the blonde to look up at her friend. Her azure eyes connected with Rinoa's chocolate brown ones, and the warmth in her friend's stare made her feel guilty, causing her to sigh apologetically.

"I'm sorry, Rinoa. I'm happy for you and Squall. Really."

An understanding smile spread across Rinoa's face and she slowly nodded. Sensing that she could be here awhile, the raven-haired woman climbed onto the bed, tucking her legs underneath her so that her stomach didn't get in the way. After Angelo jumped onto the comforter as well, much to Quistis' dismay- _That dog's hair is impossible to get out!_ -the sorceress quietly asked, "Do you want to talk?"

Quistis looked away again, fighting with herself on whether she should say anything. It wasn't that she didn't trust Rinoa, it was more so that the blue mage didn't want to seem weak. Frankly, she struggled to admit her shortcomings to anyone. Maybe the illness made her vulnerable, but the need to confide in someone- _anyone-_ made her speak. "I used to be jealous of you two, you know. I guess I still am."

Rinoa tilted her head to the side, encouraging her friend to continue.

"I've always felt like...I've always been on the sidelines. At the orphanage, from what I can remember...Squall followed Ellone everywhere, Seifer was always picking on Zell, and Irvine was pretty much Selphie's shadow. I was just kind of there.

"Now that we're older...honestly, not much has changed. Squall has you, and I've never seen him look happier. Selphie and Irvine were always meant to be together and I'm glad that they've reconnected. I'm pretty sure Zell is going to ask out that girl in the library any day now. Even  _Seifer_  has Fujin and Raijin, and he probably always will; those two are insanely loyal to him, even after everything that happened. Then there's me. Everyone has moved on and I'm just...stuck," she finished bitterly.

"I think I understand what that's like."

"Do you, Rinoa? Regardless of you and your father not getting along, at least you have one. You have a family. Then there's Zone and Watts, and the rest of the Forest Owls. People are drawn to you- they protect you. I've tried to open up and express myself time and time again, but everything I do seems to push people away."

Rinoa lowered her eyes and stared at her hands.

"I'm just tired of facing everything on my own. That's hard to explain to someone who has never experienced what that feels like," Quistis said.

Silently, Rinoa slid off the bed and straightened, pointedly looking away from Quistis. "Maybe. But I  _am_  a sorceress, remember? No matter what, even though I have Squall, I'll always feel alone. That's something no one else can even begin to understand, except for maybe Edea."

A wave of guilt swept through Quistis, and she realized that she'd basically shot her friend down by saying that her own situation was far worse, when Rinoa had only been trying to comfort her. She watched Rinoa trudge towards the door, her loyal companion right at her heels.

"Rinoa, I…" Quistis began, but her words trailed off.

The other woman turned back as the door opened, her eyebrows lowered in disappointment and quietly, she spoke. "You're right, Quistis. We are different. I'm doomed to always be alone in what I am. But because I have friends that I choose to rely on, it means that I don't have to  _feel_ alone. Quistis...you don't have to either."

With that, she stepped out into the hall and the door slid shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Quistis. More angst. Worry not, those of you who are wondering when Seifer shall return...it'll be soon. Like, really soon. Soon as in, next chapter soon :0


	5. Vulnerability

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer makes a dramatic return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading. 
> 
> This chapter marks the last that I had pre-written so updates may be a bit slower from here on out. I'll try to keep at it though, and hopefully update roughly once a week. Enjoy!

* * *

  _ **Vulnerable** : open to moral attack, criticism, temptation;_

* * *

 

All Quistis ever did nowadays was sigh; it seemed like her default response to everything. If someone asked her a redundant question, she sighed. If anything didn't go her way, she sighed. If she didn't rein herself in, it would soon become a trademark action of hers. Hyne knew the Trepies would be all over that in a heartbeat.

First, the coffee machine kept her waiting for  _fifteen_ minutes, eliciting a sigh from the blonde. If she didn't get a fresh pot of coffee first thing in the morning, she remained cranky throughout the day. No one wanted that. Then, she'd gone down to get lunch and of course, today happened to be hot dog day. She'd waited in line for nearly a half an hour before she finally returned to her desk, plate of hot dogs in hand.

She quickly scarfed her lunch down, much to Xu's amusement, and continued working on the large pile of papers in her inbox. By the time her computer's clock read  _4:57 PM_ , she only had one invoice left to process. After she completed it, she printed out the day's deposit slip and attached it to her clipboard. Taking her time, she rose from her chair and headed for the Headmaster's office. The doors creaked as usual when she pushed them open - _The Headmaster really needs to get those oiled_ \- and approached Cid's desk.

His head was bowed, and brown and silver-streaked strands of his hair hung in front of his glasses, as he pored over a document. Quistis rapped lightly on his desk with her knuckles and, startled, he hastily sat upright.

"Oh, Quistis! I didn't see you come in, I'm sorry."

"It's alright, Headmaster. I didn't exactly announce myself. Could you sign the deposit slip for the day?"

"Yes, yes, of course. Let me find a pen…" Cid trailed off, as he patted around his desk for one. When he was unable to find anything after a minute or so, Quistis swiftly pulled one out of her breast pocket, holding it out for him.

"Ah, thank you. Always prepared, aren't you, Quistis?" the older gentleman teased.

"I try, Headmaster."

The doors opened again and Quistis turned around, expecting to see Xu. Instead, Squall strode in, his heavy boots pounding on the carpeted floor. His long strides allowed him to overtake the distance between them quickly, and he stood at attention next to Quistis.

"At ease, Squall," Cid said.

"Hi, Squall. It's been awhile," Quistis greeted.

The brown-haired gunbladist glanced at Quistis and nodded in response, his mindset obviously still focused on the business at hand. Quistis saluted the Headmaster, and left the room, shutting the door behind her. As she passed Xu's desk, she tossed the signed form into her inbox as usual, and drifted back to her own desk.

Returning to her desk, she turned off her computer and began to gather her things. Xu watched her silently and when Quistis straightened, the brunette softly suggested, "You know, I think you'd benefit from taking a vacation."

"Xu...you say that all the time," Quistis said in exasperation.

"Yeah, because I mean it. You obviously need one, and I only want what's best for you."

"What makes you think I need one?" she questioned.

As soon as the words were formed on Quistis' lips, the doors to the Headmaster's office opened again, and Squall stepped out. When he spotted Quistis, he ambled over to her and asked in a low voice, "Have you talked to Rinoa, lately?"

"Not since a couple of weeks ago, when I had the flu. Why?"

"She wanted your opinion on something about the baby, I'm not entirely sure on what. Has she asked you yet?"

"Ah, no...we...haven't talked much since then," Quistis muttered.

Squall's eyebrows furrowed and he crossed his arms over his chest, causing the leather of his jacket to creak in protest. "Why not?"

"Has she not told you?" she asked quietly.

"Told me what?"

"Well, it's nothing really. Just...I said something inconsiderate and she left because she was upset."

A beat passed before Squall asked, "What did you say exactly?"

"I'd rather not go into the details. Basically, I just assumed something I shouldn't have."

"Hm. Well, you two should work it out."

Quistis hung her head and crossed her arms, her fingers tightening around her biceps. "I know we should, Squall. I just...I've been busy."

"Mmhm. You know that with Selphie gone, you're really her only friend here that she can talk to about stuff like this, right?"

"Yes, Squall. I know," she responded, irked at his reprimand.

"Okay. whatever. Just...talk to her, okay?" he suggested, and stalked over to the elevator.

Quistis brushed her hair out of her face and tucked it behind her ear, needing a moment to recover from the interaction. Xu had watched the entire exchange in silence, with her chin propped up on her hands. After the elevator started heading back down to the first floor, she finally glanced up at Quistis, who had her fingers pressed up against her forehead.

"Hey, Quistis?" she inquired.

Tired of being pestered by everyone, Quistis hesitated before responding. "Yes, Xu?"

"What do you say we hit the bar, get your mind off of everything? I mean honestly, when was the last time you went out? I've been bugging you for weeks to do something. Live a little, for once."

"The bar...tonight?" the blonde asked incredulously, as she met Xu's gaze.

"Yeah, tonight. I'd say you deserve it. Well, and that vacation, but that's another topic for another time."

"I...I don't know, I mean...I wake up pretty early. If we go out to the bar, we'll probably be out for most of the night. I don't want to get back too late. Plus the prelim budget is due in the morning, and I can't miss that deadline..." Quistis trailed off.

"Seriously? You're worried about deadlines? Come ooon, come out with me! It'll be fun! How often do we get to act our age, anyway?"

Quistis thought deeply about Xu's suggestion. Part of her shied away from the thought of being surrounded by a large amount of drunk individuals, and the raucous behavior that normally accompanied them. On the other hand, at the thought of being able to let go of all of her inhibitions and  _be_  one of those obnoxiously drunk people, she was surprised to realize that it actually did sound fun. For once, she was excited at the prospect of a night out.

In a moment of impulse, Quistis said, "You know what? Yeah, let's go."

* * *

Two hours later, the girls had traded their SeeD uniforms for something more casual and were on their way to Balamb, in an official Garden vehicle. In Xu's case, casual meant a little black dress paired with simple black heels. Xu's opinion was that Quistis was too fair to rock an all black ensemble, so she'd shoved a slinky red number the blonde's way and of course, Quistis had ended up agreeing to wear it. The dress' material fell between satin and silk, and had an exposed back with straps that criss-crossed to the front. She'd paired it with a set of black heels, like Xu's, and had chosen to leave her hair down. She couldn't remember the last time she hadn't had her hair up, and the strands brushing against the back of her neck tickled.

Red lipstick in the same shade as the dress adorned her lips, but what bothered Quistis the most, out of her entire appearance, was the dress itself. It was even shorter than the standard SeeD skirt, and the blue mage found herself constantly trying to pull the hemline down. When she struggled with it for what seemed like the fifth time, Xu rolled her eyes at her friend and said, "You know, the point of a sexy dress is to _show off_ some skin."

Quistis scoffed. "If I showed off any more, I'd be naked."

"Maybe that's the point."

"Xu!"

"Joking, joking. So this bar, how is it?" Xu asked.

"Well, I've only been there once. It's relatively new. From what I could tell, it's a lot cleaner than most bars," Quistis explained.  _Last time, I also happened to run into someone I'd rather not see again..._

At that train of thought, Quistis shook her head slightly. Just because she'd run into Seifer all those months ago, didn't mean that she needed to allow him to haunt her forever. Hyne knew she thought about the past far too much already.

They passed under the city of Balamb's front gate and parked the car next to the rental station. After the girls stepped out, Xu handed the keys to the station attendant, with the threat of bodily harm should any damage happen to the Garden-issued vehicle. With that settled, they walked down the main street towards the train station, their heels clicking on the cobblestone surface. Xu linked her arm around Quistis and said slyly, "See, the nightlife isn't so bad after all, right?"

"Xu...we're in Balamb. You could hardly call this 'the nightlife'," Quistis rebutted.

"Whatever, you know what I mean. The night is young and we're going to get drunk, and get your mind off of work."

"Suddenly, I'm  _not_  excited anymore," Quistis muttered under her breath.

The building that the duo walked into, had a bright green neon sign hanging above the door. ' _Thousand Needles'_  blinked down at them, obnoxiously announcing the name of the establishment to everyone within a five mile radius, it was so blinding.

 _Somehow, if they ever experience that attack, I'd imagine they'd want to change the name of the establishment_ , Quistis thought to herself.

Because it was a Friday night, the bar was packed. The girls tried to peer over all the people in the room to find a place to sit, and Xu finally spotted an empty booth in the far corner, by the restrooms. They made a beeline for the table and Quistis hastily slid onto the seat, setting her purse down on the table. Xu remained standing and pointed at the bar, shouting over the music, "I'm going to go get us our first round, okay?"

Quistis nodded in affirmation, not wanting to even attempt shouting over the noise. Subconsciously, her fingers pulled at the hem of her dress again until she caught herself, and instead spread her hands out in her lap. A few minutes later, Xu returned with a tray of shot glasses, filled to the brim with clear liquid. She set it down in the middle of the table, and slid into the booth on the opposite side of Quistis. After she was settled, she leaned over the table and said, "Does it always smell like piss and vomit in here?"

The blonde threw her head back and laughed, as a smile spread across her face. "Pretty much. I asked myself the same thing when I was here last time."

Xu shook her head, amused, and passed over two shot glasses to Quistis. The girls lifted them and clinked the tips together in a salute, and downed both of the shots quickly. Quistis cringed at the harsh burn and choked out, "Did you get tequila?"

With her face equally scrunched up in distaste, Xu nodded. "It was cheaper than vodka."

"Ugh, I'll go get us something a little more palatable," Quistis offered, as she slid out of her seat and grabbed her purse. In her attempt to get to the bar, she had to squeeze in between quite a few people and more often than not, she got a few disgruntled patrons glaring at her. After what felt like years, she finally braced herself on the bartop and tried to catch the bartender's eye. The old gentleman from last time was nowhere to be seen and most of the bartenders tonight seemed rather young.

Eventually, one of the bartenders, a man with a bright blue mohawk, spotted Quistis and wandered over to her. "What can I get ya?"

"Uh, I'll take...four shots of bourbon, and can I also get a whiskey on the rocks?"

"Sure thing. Wanna open a tab?"

"Yes, please. That'd be great," she replied.

After a couple of minutes, the bartender returned with a tray, laden with her requested beverages, and handed it over to Quistis. She nodded her thanks and turned around, trying to make her way back to Xu without spilling anything. As she nudged her way through the crowd, working on keeping the tray balanced, she glanced over to their table and was surprised to see Nida, sitting in the booth with Xu.

She paused, trying to figure out why Nida would be here, since Xu had never mentioned that he'd be joining them. Unfortunately, she'd remained standing in a crowd of intoxicated individuals for a bit too long, and a burly man jabbed Quistis in the side, causing her to yelp. The tray tilted sideways and she tried to right it, but the glass of whiskey started to slide off. Just as the glass fell off the lip of the tray, a strong hand snaked out of the crowd and caught it in mid-air. Finally, Quistis managed to get the tray level again and she turned to thank the man for saving her drink. As she spun around and saw him, she froze in place.

Seifer Almasy's vivid turquoise eyes bore into hers and her heart stopped. Whether it was due to the two shots she'd already consumed, or whether it was the sheer shock at seeing him again -in the  _same_  bar nonetheless- Quistis wasn't entirely sure. He also seemed surprised to see her, judging by how tightly he was holding onto the glass and how tense his shoulders were. His knuckles were starting to turn white from his death grip on her cup and Quistis gestured to it.

"Can I...have that back?"

As if snapping out of a trance, he quickly shoved the glass towards Quistis and she barely managed to grab it before he let go. She placed it gently on the tray, which Seifer took from her unexpectedly. Indignantly, she protested, "I can carry a tray, Seifer."

"Of course you can, that's why you almost dropped it just now, right?" his deep voice boomed at her.

"I was handling it just fine."

"Yeah, I'll  _bet_ you handle things just fine."

" _Excuse_  me?" she asked, stunned at his audacity.

"Nothing, Instructor. Are you here by yourself again? You're gonna turn into an alcoholic if you keep hittin' up the bar with no friends to keep you in check. I mean, from the amount of drinks on this tray, one would think you were  _trying_  to drink yourself to death."

Seifer raised an eyebrow when she didn't comment on his jab. Quistis refused to meet his gaze and quickly looked down at her heels, as she muttered, "I'm not here alone, I came with Xu."

"Xu? Wow, Miss Prissy actually drinks?"

"She's not prissy, Seifer, that's really rude. We were sitting...over there…" Quistis trailed off, as she pointed at the booth in the corner that Xu  _and_ Nida now occupied.

Seifer glanced over his shoulder at the booth and when he turned again, he smirked. "Well well, looks like 'girl's night' is over before it even began. Bringing her boyfriend is kind of a low blow, don't you think?"

"He's not her boyfriend-and she didn't  _bring_  him. He wasn't here when I came to get more drinks."

"Hm," he grunted, and gestured towards the bar. "Well, looks like they might be a while. Keep me company over there?"

"Oh uh, I don't know…"

"Come on," he insisted, as he grasped her shoulder and pushed her lightly towards the bar.

Quistis took a deep breath and exhaled loudly, before she trudged back to where she just came from. She climbed onto a free stool and Seifer set down the tray of drinks before he sat down on the stool next to her, whirling around to face her. As he turned, he nudged the side of her thigh with his knee, which sent a shock tingling up Quistis' spine. She sputtered at his invasion of her personal space and promptly moved her legs under the counter, to make room for his much longer legs.

"So, what caused you to grace this inferior establishment with your presence on a Friday night, hm?" Seifer pried.

"Nothing," Quistis said.

"Riiiiight. And I'm the President of Galbadia," he said.

"Why are  _you_  here, Seifer?" she asked, needling him.

"It's a bar. I'm here to get rip-roaring drunk, obviously," he replied, as he reached out for one of the shots of bourbon.

As he lifted the glass to his lips, Quistis started to open her mouth to protest that he was taking drinks he wouldn't be paying for, but at the last minute, she changed her mind. Seifer was Seifer, and he was going to do whatever he wanted, regardless of whether she said anything.

Though they weren't technically alone, the way Seifer angled his body towards Quistis made it seem as if, in this moment, it was only the two of them. The awkwardness of the situation became painfully obvious. The space between them seemed charged with electricity; Quistis was more than aware of their close proximity, as the fabric of Seifer's black pants rubbed against her bare thigh every time he shifted on his stool.

A few tense moments of silence passed by, before Seifer finally turned to Quistis, placing her glass of whiskey in front of her. Quistis eyed the honey-colored liquid before glancing up at Seifer, confused at how he knew the whiskey had been hers.

"You were drinking one, when I saw you last," he explained, when he saw the expression on her face.

"Don't pretend that you remember. That was months ago."

"I remember a lot more than people think I do," Seifer mumbled.

At that, which seemed like a thinly veiled reminder of the past, Quistis looked down uncomfortably at her hands in her lap. With Seifer sitting right next to her, she felt even more exposed in this dress. She tried to subtly pull the hemline down without getting his attention, but of course, he'd never let anything like that slide.

Without making eye contact, he reached for another shot glass and in a low voice, commented, "You've always had amazing legs, why are you trying so hard to hide them?"

Quistis froze at being caught, not sure if she'd correctly heard what he'd said over the ambient noise. " What did you say?" she asked, as she looked up at him.

He swiftly tossed the bourbon back, cringing only slightly at the harshness of it, and his gaze swiveled around to meet hers. The shade of his eyes had always been incredibly bright, and even in the darkness of the bar, they seemed to catch every ray of light so they appeared to glow. When he spoke again, his voice was rough, almost hoarse. "You heard what I said, Instructor. Though in a dress like that, a guy would have to be blind to  _not_  see your...assets."

When she realized that he'd been using her former title again, a fresh wave of anger quickly swept through her. "Really, Seifer? One minute you're complimenting me and the next, you're insulting me with that Instructor crap," she said, between clenched teeth.

Though she was trying to deny to herself that he'd actually complimented her, deep down, she knew that he had -and that he'd meant it- which made her uncomfortably good about herself. For once, someone  _noticed_  her, noticed the effort she'd put in. Now of course, because he was Seifer, he just had to go and ruin the moment.

"You do know that I do it just to piss you off, right?" he asked.

"Yes," Quistis muttered.

"Good. Have another shot," he said, as he placed a shot glass in front of her.

Quistis scoffed and glared at him, gesturing to her glass of whiskey. "I still haven't finished this drink."

"You're right, you haven't even started."

With a sigh, she quickly downed the shot, as well as her whiskey, and roughly placed the glasses back down on the table with a thud. She breathed out slowly, trying to will the burning in her throat to fade. When she looked up at Seifer again, he was smirking, clearly impressed at her gusto.

"Don't even start. I've had a long week," she said defensively.

"I didn't say anything."

The realization that she was in a dive bar, drinking with  _Seifer_ of all people, hit her then and she giggled. It was just so out of character for her and such an outrageous situation. What were the chances? When she realized what she'd done, she rapidly clapped her hand over her mouth. Afraid that Seifer had noticed, she tried to surreptitiously glance at him out of the corner of her eye. His lips were turned up in a smile, and she groaned inwardly. He'd definitely noticed.

"I'm surprised, Quistis. I didn't know you knew  _how_  to laugh."

"Don't be an ass. Pretend you didn't hear it, please? It...makes me self conscious," she commanded.

"You know, you light up when you laugh? It's pretty sexy," he admitted.

Quistis sat there in silence, unsure of how to respond to that. By this point, she'd had far too much alcohol and could barely process the fact that Seifer had given her a compliment, let alone respond.

When she still hadn't said anything after a few seconds, Seifer straightened on his seat and rested his hand on the counter. "So, why exactly are you drowning your sorrows in bars so often lately? This is the second time I've seen you here, you know."

"Rinoa and I had a disagreement a couple of weeks ago," she admitted hastily.

"A disagreement sends you on a bender?" he asked, a bit confused at her sudden change in topic.

Quistis shot him a look and said, "I said something I shouldn't have."

"I...can't really see you and Rinoa fighting, unless it's with pillows. I might have visualized that once or twice."

"Why do you have to be so  _vulgar_ all the time? We weren't  _fighting_. I just...I hurt her feelings. Again, like I did all those years ago in Deling."

"What exactly did you say?"

"I was trying to tell her that I had always felt isolated, and she turned it around and used her own situation as an example. She had to remind me -as if I'd forgotten- that she was a sorceress and that they were always alone. So then I felt guilty for putting her down, but it was like she didn't even see where I was coming from," she vented.

"Unbelievable," he muttered.

"What is?"

"The fact that you still think that everything is about you."

Quistis' mouth dropped open in indignation. "You're kidding me, right?"

" 'Oh, I'm Quistis, no one understands me. Woe is me!' " he mocked.

"I told you how I felt at your insistence and now you throw it back in my face? Thanks." Quistis scoffed in disbelief and went to slide off the stool.

Seifer reached out and grasped her wrist tightly, not allowing her to leave. "Let me say my piece, then you can go."

"Let me go, Seifer," she demanded harshly.

The fierce expression on Seifer's face fell and it morphed into something more akin to desperation. "Please."

She hesitated at his plea. Seifer wasn't one to beg very often-if ever. Reluctantly, she sat back down and faced him again. "Fine. Talk," she mumbled.

"You've always assumed that you're alone. But really, you've always had this support system behind you that you just ignore. There are so many people out there who don't have that, Quistis. I sure as hell don't, and  _I_  know what being truly alone is like. Here you are, with people reaching out to you and you're just turning away from them. Even after Cid managed to get a full pardon for me, people  _still_  run away from me, and I mean that literally.

Do you have any idea what it's like to have everyone stare at you in hatred, everywhere you go? Or to have some evil sorceress take over your mind, your thoughts, and fuck with your deepest desires? Your most intense dreams?"

The entire time Seifer had spoken, his eyes were lit with a fire that Quistis, for the first time in the long time that they'd known each other, was frightened of. He'd always been a passionate individual, but this type of passion was something she knew all too well.  _That_  was what frightened her the most. The fact that they actually had something in common: the feeling of loss and a sense of not belonging...anywhere. With anyone.

She broke eye contact at the end of his confession and looked at her hands again, tracing the scars she'd gained from all the battles she'd been in. It was funny, she could run headlong into a fierce battle with no hesitation, but asking for help? The mere thought of doing that made her break out in a sweat.

Quietly, she said, "You're right. I don't know what any of that feels like. I didn't think about how you might've felt then, either. I guess I...I'm scared to  _ask_  for help. I'm terrified of losing control of the situation and having them just turn away from me." She scoffed before mumbling under her breath, "I guess I'm more like Squall than I realized, huh?"

It was Seifer's turn to scoff in disbelief and vehemently, he said, "You are  _nothing_  like puberty boy."

He seemed to deflate by her admission and rubbed his hands down his face, propping them up on the counter afterwards, absentmindedly playing with one of the empty shot glasses. In the silence that filled the air between them, Quistis took the time to study his hands-something she'd never done before.

Mostly that had been because he'd always worn his leather gloves, just like Squall. A gunblade was a difficult weapon to wield, and calluses were simply trophies proving the hard work that went into becoming proficient at it. In this particular moment though, his hands were bare. They were large, hefty even, and the veins on top were prominent enough for her to trace their paths from across the table. His fingers were wide, capable of wrapping themselves around the handle of his gunblade with ease. Surprisingly, his fingernails were kept short and neat, a personal hygiene task that most men seemed to ignore. However, in stark contrast to their overall cleanliness, his hands were riddled with scars-more so than even her own. His fingers were crisscrossed with white slashes and the tops of his hands had crescent marks and diagonal lines running across them.

Seifer's voice broke her out of her reverie. "Whatever, that's in the past. It's not like I think about it a whole lot either."

"That can't be true. From the way that you sounded just now, it seems like something you reflect on rather often."

He narrowed his eyes at her and muttered, "How about we drop my little confession just like we're dropping the fact that I heard you giggle earlier, hm?"

Indignantly, she said, "I didn't  _giggle_. It was a regular, normal laugh…"

"Right. Hey, you know what? I need some air. Come with me?" he asked, as he slid off of the stool and stood, rather unsteadily.

"W-what? No, I should wait here in case Xu needs to find me."

"I don't think she'll be lookin' for you any time soon. She and pretty boy over there are still cozying up in the corner. Come on, Instructor. Act for once without weighing all of the pros and cons, okay? It's liberating, I promise," he encouraged, as he sidled over to her and grasped her hand in his.

Xu's face flashed through Quistis' mind then and she groaned, realizing that she'd forgotten that she'd come to the bar with her friend-she and Seifer had been talking for far longer than she had thought. She glanced over at the booth, where Xu and Nida were now wrapped around each other, and her nose wrinkled up in distaste. Lightly, she pulled her hand out of Seifer's, missing the warmth of his skin for reasons she didn't quite understand in her currently intoxicated state, and gestured over to the booth.

"I should return to Xu...I'd feel bad leaving without letting her know."

"Yeah, because she's being such a good friend, making out with her boyfriend in the corner and all," he said, rolling his eyes.

Quistis waved her hand in the air in dismissal and slid off of her stool, making her way over to the booth with uncoordinated legs, leaving Seifer behind at the bar. When she reached the booth, she rested her hands on the table for balance and cleared her throat obnoxiously. Xu and Nida jumped apart and Xu turned to face Quistis, trying to smooth her hair down.

"Oh, Quistis! Where have you been?"

"At the bar. Hey, I think I'm just going to take a cab back, you can stay with Nida. Deadline tomorrow morning and all."

"Wait, are you sure? I can take us back-" Xu began to say until Quistis started shaking her head.

"No, I'm fine with a cab. Stay, have fun! I'll see you tomorrow!" the blonde reassured, nearly tripping over herself as she headed towards the door.

"Alright, if you're sure...I'm sorry, okay? See you later?" Xu asked, and Quistis nodded as she walked away with a wave. She weaved through the crowd and when she got to the door, she pushed it open roughly, causing it to slam against the building. A cool Balamb breeze drifted over her, colder than it had been when they'd first arrived and she shivered. Over the sound of rumbling thunder in the distance, she faintly heard the sound of the door shutting behind her, after she'd stepped out onto the street.

With a deep breath, she started heading for the exit to ask the attendant to call her a cab until she realized she didn't even know what time it was. She pulled her phone out of her purse and when she pressed the button on the side,  _1:32 A.M._  blinked up at her and she groaned. The attendant closed his window at 1:00 sharp, which left her stranded...in the cold, in a skimpy dress.

Unfortunately for her, in addition to being unprepared for the sudden chill, she was also more intoxicated than she'd realized and now that she was standing, it was hitting her full force. As she tried to decide what her options were, the heel of her shoe got caught in the mortar in between the stones and she nearly fell, catching herself on the side of the building. She heard a muffled chuckle from behind her and she whirled around, her eyes narrowing in anger at being watched.

Seifer was standing on the other side of the street, leaning against a building, watching her struggle with an amused smile on his face. "You know, I think this is the first time I've seen you like this," he said, his voice sounding incredibly loud in the silence of the night.

Her eyebrows furrowed, causing her forehead to crease up. "Like what? Drunk?"

He walked up to her then and his bright, cerulean eyes met her equally crystalline ones. He gazed at her without saying a word and his eyes flitted from her loose, golden hair to the red lipstick that colored her lips. The vivid shade caused them to stand out and when his stare lingered on them for a moment longer than was polite, she stuck her tongue out to wet them, feeling uncomfortable, and his gaze shot back up.

"This is the first time you've let your hair down, foregone your glasses and...put  _lipstick_  on. It's the first time I've seen you so...shit, I don't know." After the words left him, he turned away again and stared out past Balamb's docks, to the dark ocean beyond.

"So...what?" Quistis asked quietly, hesitantly. If she had to admit it to herself, she was slightly afraid of his answer.

Without looking back at her and actively avoiding eye contact, he whispered, "So...beautiful."

Either she was far more intoxicated than she realized or she'd actually heard him say what she thought he'd said. She reached out and grabbed his hand and he reluctantly turned back to face her. His eyebrows were lowered, uncertainty clouding his expression, and he let go of her hand almost immediately, trudging towards the hotel around the corner.

It started sprinkling then, and the frigid drops of rain began to gently fall on to her skin. A few beads hit the top of her head and her hair began to darken, as it gradually moistened. Through the unexpected shower, she watched him walk away from her, realizing then that he had been as vulnerable in that moment as she had felt over the past few months. Hastily, she ran after him and pulled harshly on his coat sleeve, yanking him around to face her once more.

"How can you say something like that and then just walk away?!" she asked, heatedly.

He shrugged, indifferent. "Fuckin' alcohol. That kind of just...slipped out," he muttered as he turned away and rubbed his chin.

"You  _would_  blame it on the alcohol, Seifer. Admit to what you said."

" What good will it do either of us if I say it again?"

"...I just...I  _really_  need to hear it again."

Seifer just stared at her, his face devoid of emotion, dewdrops resting on his eyelashes. When he didn't reply, Quistis huffed and mumbled 'fine' under her breath, stalking towards the town's exit. She stumbled a couple of times again and Seifer sighed, as he watched her try to walk away with her dignity intact. By the time she reached the door to Zell's Ma's house, she'd stumbled three more times and he quickly strode after her, pulling on her arm to turn her around.

"Will you stop? You're going to break your ankle by the time you get outta here. You're obviously way too drunk to make it back to Garden tonight and it just started pouring. You walk back now, you're also gonna get sick."

"Well I  _was_  going to get a cab, but...I didn't realize how late it was. It's not like I  _knew_  it was going to start raining, either," she muttered.

He ran his fingers through his hair and said, "Look, I'm sure as shit not gonna be caught going back to Garden of my own accord, so I'm not going to take you back. I'm not really in the best condition to do so, anyway. I'm staying at the hotel. Just...come back with me tonight and we'll figure it out tomorrow, when we're less drunk and it's not fuckin' stormin'."

At the prospect of staying in Seifer's hotel room, alone with him, Quistis crossed her arms over her chest tightly, as if she were trying to hide her appearance. Her expression shuttered and she looked away, over his shoulder.

"Don't look like that, Hyne. I'm not going to throw you over my shoulder and assault you. I'll sleep on the floor, I promise," he stated, as he raised his hands in the air in a gesture of goodwill.

"You? Promise?"

"Yes, Quistis. I  _promise_."

Hesitantly, she glanced over her shoulder at the archway that was so close and yet so far from her. She slowly turned back and met Seifer's gaze, holding it for a few moments to try and gauge how much she could really trust him.

Eventually, a resigned sigh left her and she mumbled, "Okay."

"Okay. Take those god damn death traps off, so we can actually make it to the hotel. Not that they don't make you look sexy and all, but I really would prefer  _not_  to carry you over my shoulder. Doubt I could make the locals like me any less, but I'd rather not try."

Muttering under her breath, Quistis reached down and pulled her heels off, carrying them with her fingers as they traipsed to the hotel. After they entered, she trailed after Seifer through the lobby, up the stairs, and headed down the hall right behind him, until he stopped in front of room '128' on their left. He pulled a keycard out of his inner coat pocket and pushed the heavy door open, indicating that she should go first. She padded past him, her bare feet quiet on the carpeted floors.

When the door swung shut loudly, he brushed past her and shrugged his tattered grey trenchcoat off, slinging it over the back of the only chair in the room. Quistis' gaze flitted about the room, taking in the homely, but cozy surroundings. There was only one bed, as Seifer had implied when he said he'd take the floor, and it was draped in a frilly, sky blue comforter. The shaggy carpet was also blue, as was the floral wallpaper. The hotel's owners were obviously rather fond of the color.

Seifer faced Quistis again and shoved his hands into his trousers' front pockets, shrugging at their surroundings. "So uh, yeah. This is the room I'm staying in."

"I...gathered as much," Quistis replied, as she set her shoes and purse down on the floor, next to the door.

She tucked her bangs behind her ear and, embarrassed that she even had to ask, requested, "Do you...have an extra shirt I could borrow? I don't think sleeping in this dress would be all too comfortable."

At the mention of her slinky red attire, his gaze quickly drifted over her body and he coughed to mask his embarrassment, turning around to reach into the dresser behind him. He lifted a simple white shirt out and held it out to her, which she quickly took from him and ducked into the adjoining bathroom. Hurriedly, she tugged the skintight dress off and clumsily pulled the shirt over her head, lifting her damp hair out from underneath the collar. The hem was long, as she had been counting on, and it reached about mid-thigh on her.

Hesitantly, she trailed out off the bathroom and cleared her throat to indicate that she was finished changing. Seifer had moved to look out the window, brushing one of the curtain a, and he turned around then, freezing when he saw her. She shifted uncomfortably at his scrutiny and slowly trudged over to the bed. His eyes followed her and Quistis could swear she could feel the heat of his gaze on her legs as she drifted past him.

When her thighs touched the comforter, she felt Seifer's hand gently grasp her forearm, pulling on it slightly. She acquiesced to his silent request and looked up at him, over her shoulder. With more concentration than she would have thought him capable of, he gazed fiercely down at her. His brilliant turquoise eyes bore into hers, not allowing her to look away, and her breathing quickened at his undivided attention. With the light hitting his face just so, he looked remarkably handsome.

Whether it was the alcohol clouding her judgment and her ability to think, or whether it was the fact that she subconsciously had always wanted to do this, she couldn't say. Even in the future, when she looked back on this moment and asked herself why, she still couldn't figure out the real reason why she'd stepped up.

Quistis braced herself on Seifer's arm, pushing herself up on to her tiptoes to reach his face. She pressed her lips gently against his and closed her eyes in concentration, hoping for a reaction of some sort. When he didn't respond, she leaned away and opened her eyes again, studying his expression. His eyes were narrowed as he looked down at her, trying to gauge why she would ever do such a thing.

"I-I understand," she muttered, as she averted her gaze and stepped back, crossing her arms over her chest.

 _This is what I get for trying to make the first move_ , she thought bitterly.

Seifer grasped Quistis' face, asking her silently to look up at him, and the pressure of his fingers pressed painfully into her chin. His lips came crashing down against hers then, and the unexpected action sent a searing wave of heat through her. He wrapped his arm around her back, pulling her flush against his body. Quistis marveled at how soft his lips were-such an unexpected observation to make. He broke away and planted gentle kisses along the edge of her jaw before returning to the main attraction. Hesitantly, he licked the seam of her lips, begging for entrance. Quistis fought him the first few attempts, until finally, she gave in. Seifer took the opportunity to sweep in then, and his tongue caressed hers lightly, causing metaphorical fireworks to set off throughout Quistis' entire body.

He kept her on the brink, teasing her by alternating featherlight strokes with more full contact. Eventually, Quistis broke away for air and tucked her head into the crook of his neck, hiding her face from his view. Seifer gently ran his fingers through her golden strands of hair, while she struggled to catch her breath.

"Holy shit," she mumbled, surprised at her body's reaction to him. Sure, Seifer had always been attractive and she'd heard plenty of rumors of his prowess when he had been at Garden, but  _this_ far exceeded her expectations.

He snickered at her reaction, ever the egotistical male, and she rolled her eyes at him before she straightened and playfully punched him on the upper arm-more of a light tap than anything. He grasped his bicep in mock pain and mouthed 'ow' and she shook her head, as an amused smile teased at the corners of her lips. They gazed into each other's eyes for a second before their expressions sobered.

Hesitantly, Quistis placed her hand in his much larger one, the warmth from the feeling of skin-on-skin spreading through her all the way to her toes. Part of her was irked that Seifer seemed to know her so well. He knew her personality, her common tendencies-he even knew the exact way to kiss her that made her knees weak, and considering she hadn't had much experience with that, it was nearly a miracle that he was capable of such a thing. The other part of her was so grateful and relieved that  _someone_ , even though it was Seifer, was willing to listen to her rant and actually understood where she was coming from. Right at this moment, she didn't want to delve too deep into the 'hows' or 'whys' of the situation. She just wanted to experience those fireworks again.

From under lashes, Quistis glanced up at him and shyly asked, "Again?"

A grin spread across his face and he wrapped his arms around her again, lowering them onto the bed, still entwined around each other. He asked for permission to deepen the kiss again and she accepted, opening her mouth for him. As his tongue caressed the tip of hers, he planted his hands flat against her back and laid her down gently, holding himself above her so that his body weight didn't crush her.

Quistis lost herself in the kiss, unaware of how long it went on for, forgetting even where they were...until Seifer started to slide his hand up and under her loose fitting shirt-well, his shirt. She froze, her fingers still entangled in his incredibly soft hair. When he sensed that she had stopped responding, he lifted his head and gazed down his aquiline nose at her.

"Too far?"

"Uh, a little. I think...actually, I can't think. Can you...can you get off me?"

He sighed softly and lifted himself off of her, planting his feet firmly back on the carpet beside the bed. She sat up and straightened the shirt, clearing her throat in an attempt to both center herself and get rid of the awkward tension.

"Well. I'm going to uh, get comfortable on the floor so...night," Seifer mumbled, avoiding making eye contact with her.

Quistis nodded and immediately after, he turned off the lights, plunging them into darkness.


	6. Fortuitous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quistis returns to Garden from her little escapade at the bar, and gets a bit of a surprise later that day.

* * *

_**Fortuitous:** happening or produced by chance; accidental._

* * *

Quistis floated in the void between consciousness and deep sleep, instinctively rolling towards the comforting warmth of the sun's rays that drifted in through the hotel's sheer curtains. The silky blue comforter was twisted around her slender calves; one leg rested on top of the blanket, while the other was pinned underneath. She snuggled her face into the goose down pillow, sighing in content. Her mattress back at Garden was most definitely not this comfortable.

_Wait...Garden...why am I not at Garden?_

The thought floated aimlessly around in her mind for a few minutes, before she shot up in bed with a loud gasp, as the realization hit her. The unfamiliar sight of pale blue wallpaper greeted her, and she turned to her left, towards the bright light that was permeating the room. Languidly, she untangled herself from the blanket and slid off of the bed, silently padding over to the window. When she pushed the white curtain out of the way, she could see the wooden piers of the Balamb docks, and the calming sound of the water lapping against them reached her ears. She tilted her head in confusion at the sight, as her slender eyebrows lowered over her narrowed eyes.

_Why am I still in Balamb?_  she asked herself, as she tried to remember the events of the night before.

Hazy memories of heading to the bar with Xu, as well as her conversation with Seifer and the storm forcing her to return to the hotel with him -and the  _kiss_  they'd shared- hit her suddenly, and she groaned. She whirled around and her gaze flitted from left to right, until she spotted Seifer, still fast asleep in the opposite corner of the room, by the bathroom door. It was at that moment, that she realized she really,  _really_  needed to relieve her bladder.

Quistis tiptoed around him to the adjoining bathroom, trying to make as little noise as possible. He'd bunched up his trench coat in a poor attempt to make a pillow and had his arms crossed tightly over his chest, his brows furrowed over his closed eyes. Since she had her eyes fixated on Seifer, she failed to notice the corner of the wall rapidly approaching, as she neared the bathroom. With a resounding smack, her elbow collided with the sharp edge.

"Ow, shit!"

The blonde curled into a ball, cradling her arm as waves of pain shot through it. Her expletive had been rather loud and she glanced back at Seifer, surprised to find that he hadn't woken up. Rubbing her elbow, she slowly turned back around and stepped into the bathroom. The transition from plush blue carpet to cold tiles sent shivers up her spine.

She flipped on the fluorescent light and shut the door gently. She made a beeline for the toilet and quickly took care of her business, rinsing her hands afterwards and glancing up into the mirror at her reflection. At the sight of her smeared makeup and ratty hair, she grimaced in disgust and averted her gaze. She definitely needed to take a shower when she got back to Garden.

_Speaking of which…_ Quistis thought, as she scanned the bathroom for her discarded dress from the night before. When she finally spotted it, tossed carelessly into the corner, she hastily pulled Seifer's shirt off and slid back into the skintight garment.

_I really hope Xu wasn't overly fond of this dress_ , she thought.

It wasn't a completely lost cause, but it would take quite a bit of dry cleaning to be presentable again, after surviving a rainstorm and being bunched up overnight.

She slinked out of the bathroom and headed over to the door, bending down to pick up her 'death trap shoes' -as Seifer had called them- and her purse. Trying to be as quiet as possible, she pulled the door open and hesitated in the doorway, glancing back at Seifer's sleeping form. A flash of guilt spread through her at just sneaking away without saying anything. However, in the early morning hours, without being able to hide behind her inebriation, she was struck by a streak of cowardice-she was afraid of the possible confrontation and rather than meet it head on, she ducked into the hallway.

Hastily, she sprinted down the steps to the lobby, afraid that Seifer would wake up and come out into the hall at any second, shaking his fist at her in anger for skipping out on him. The receptionist raised an eyebrow at Quistis' appearance as the blonde passed by the podium, and she leaned over and slipped her heels back on, before stepping out onto Balamb's cobblestone street, into the blinding sunlight.

Squinting her ice-blue eyes at the overwhelming brightness, she walked on wobbly feet towards the town's front gate, her steps faltering a couple of times, as her heels got stuck in the mortar between the bricks. Miraculously, she finally walked up to the window of the rental booth with her ankles intact.

"Good morning!" the attendant greeted her cheerfully, a friendly smile on his face.

"Morning. I'd like to rent a car, please."

"Of course! It's five thousand gil per day, and then three thousand gil per fuel unit. Is that alright?"

"Sure," Quistis mumbled, as she reached into her purse to grab the funds. She counted out two hundred gil and swore under her breath before looking back up at the attendant.

"Actually, can you charge the fees to Garden?"

"Absolutely, ma'am. We do that all the time! Just fill out this form with the required information, please," he instructed, as he pushed a clipboard through the window slot towards her.

She filled out the forms quickly, her letters sloppy in her haste, and slid the clipboard back to him, drumming her fingers on the countertop as she waited. Finally, he passed a set of keys her way as he said, "Here you are! Charged to Garden, as requested. Drive safely!"

Quistis mumbled her thanks as she swiped the keys off of the countertop and hit the unlock button. The lights on a compact, blue convertible flashed at her and she quickly slid onto the leather driver's seat. Once she turned the key in the ignition and the engine flared to life, she carefully pulled out of the tiny space and turned out onto the main road.

Her eyes inspected the dash until she found the button to activate the convertible top and it slowly folded down with an electronic whir. The warm Balamb breeze ruffled the strands of her hair and a grin teased at the corners of her lips. Driving was an activity that she'd always enjoyed, though she rarely got to do it. When they used Garden vehicles for missions, one of the cadets or another SeeD member usually drove, so that they could return the car to Garden after dropping the team off at the town's front gate. Even though she was hung over beyond belief, the one positive was that she got to drive back to Garden herself for once-and in perfect weather, too.

As she followed the curve of the road, the beach appeared off to her right and her gaze slid over to the beautiful view. Seagulls flew overhead and cawed, their calls intermingling with the sound of the waves. Though Garden was by no means a cottage with a white picket fence, it didn't make it any less  _home_. The past few years had been rough, yes, but when the familiar sight of Garden's blue, massive façade rose up ahead, she was grateful that she at least had it to consider as home. The entire orphanage gang, in fact, was lucky that they had anything at all.

At that, her thoughts strayed back to Seifer. In addition to feeling guilty about leaving him so abruptly, she now wondered what he had been doing in Balamb both times she'd seen him. Obviously, since he was staying at the hotel, it meant that he didn't have a permanent residence. Was he in Balamb on business then? Or was he using the hotel as his residence?

His words from last night came back to her then:  _Unbelievable…You still think everything is about you…_

Quistis cringed. She'd been so offended when he'd said that but he apparently knew her better than she knew herself. Worst of all, he'd been right. She'd complained about all of her problems to him and even though he'd brought her up to speed about the past three years of his life, she'd just compared it to her situation-rather than thinking about how it might have made  _him_  feel, about what he'd gone through as he'd tried to pick up the shattered pieces of his life. It had taken her up until this point to even begin to question why he was staying at the hotel, without Fujin and Raijin to boot. The thought of him wandering throughout his life, throughout the  _world_ , without a purpose, made her heart ache for him and just like last night, she was struck with amazement at how similar their lives had been-or at least, where they'd ended up.

Now, because hindsight is twenty-twenty, she felt even worse for deserting him. Hyne knew when she'd see him again.

Finally, she arrived at the wrought iron gate in front of Garden and pulled into the parking garage entrance, bringing the convertible top back up as she descended into the dark lot. She parked in the first spot by the door and clambered out, tucking the keys into her purse after she locked it up. Her heels clicked on the concrete floor of the hallway leading to the main lobby, and she crossed her fingers that she wouldn't run into anyone before she had a chance to make it back to her dorm room.

The comforting sound of the fountains in the lobby surrounded Quistis, and she gazed upwards at the sky, as she wandered towards the back of the building. A few students were wandering around the halls but for the most part, Garden was relatively empty.

_Everyone must be in class. Thank Hyne_ , Quistis thought, relieved at her stroke of luck.

After what felt like ages, she approached the door with her nameplate on it and let herself into her room, shutting the door behind her and wandering into the bedroom. Her purse bounced when she tossed it onto her bed, and she quickly stripped out of Xu's dress, kicking it to the side before ambling into her bathroom.

The shower always took a few minutes to warm up, so she turned the dial all the way to hot and stuck her hand under the cold trickle to make sure it was warming up, before she traipsed over to the sink. She brushed her teeth and stripped out of her undergarments afterwards, returning to the now-warm shower. A quick shower was known to fix a lot of problems and she stepped into the stall with anticipation coursing through her, shutting the glass door securely behind her.

Once she stepped into the stream of warm water and her hair began to dampen, she sighed in relief. There weren't many comforts offered in the life of a mercenary for hire, but she thanked Hyne that periodically, hot showers were in the cards.

Her thoughts wandered as she went through the motions, from thinking about Seifer, to questioning what she really wanted out of life. Though she thoroughly enjoyed teaching, being stuck in the interim left her feeling empty and it made her question whether she enjoyed being a SeeD at all. The events of her life thus far had left her little choice, but she was an adult now; she was perfectly capable of asking herself whether she was ready to move on, or whether this was her true calling.

When she was finished rinsing the soap from her body, she turned off the stream of water and stepped out of the stall, grabbing the fluffy white towel hanging from the rack by the door.

Thirty minutes later, she was completely ready for the day and she left her room, heading back out into the lobby. The elevator ride was blissfully uninterrupted and Quistis thought that she just might be in the clear. That is, until she arrived on the third floor.

"Quistis, what is  _this_?!" Xu's angry voice demanded, as soon as the blonde stepped off of the elevator.

A paper was subsequently thrust into her face and the words were far too close to her eyes for her to be able to read anything. She gently pushed Xu's arm back, allowing her vision to focus on what appeared to be a bill for the car rental from Balamb.

_Oh shit…_

"Uh, I had to rent a car?" Quistis explained, trying to brush it off as no big deal.

"Yes, yes you did. I can clearly see that. I can also see the time stamp, which is marked as only two hours ago. I thought you took a cab back last night?!"

"Well turns out it was past one, so I was kind of stranded."

"And you didn't come back into the bar to get me...why?"

"Because I found a place to crash for the night?" Quistis offered.

Xu stared in silence at her friend, her face completely blank as she processed that bit of information. "Quistis...who  _are_  you? Since when do you just leave with random people? Granted, from what I could tell from the back of the guy's head, he seemed hot-" Quistis snorted at the fact that Xu had just unknowingly called Seifer Almasy  _hot_. "-but he could have been dangerous."

At that, Quistis rolled her eyes. "Please, Xu. We both know that I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. And besides, it worked out. I snuck out of the room this morning and avoided having to explain anything to him."

"Hyne, you  _slept_  with him?!"

"No! I never said that! He was a perfect gentleman and let me take the bed, while he slept on the floor."

"..."

"Xu, it was fine, I promise. Can we just...get to work?"

"Next time, come back and get me, got it?" the brunette demanded, as she poked Quistis in the chest with her finger.

Quistis brushed her friend's hand aside and wandered over to her desk. "Yes, yes, I promise."

The rest of the day passed with no further events, other than Xu glaring daggers at Quistis from across the way every few hours. An hour before she finished for the day, Headmaster Cid popped his head out of his office and looked at Quistis, his expression unreadable.

"Quistis, could you come into my office for a minute?"

"Of course, Headmaster," she replied, as she rose from her desk and trailed through the open door.

She shut it softly behind her, before she walked up to the Headmaster's desk. Cid stood opposite from Quistis and had a manila envelope clasped tightly in his hand. When her eyes flitted from the envelope to meet his gaze, he straightened his glasses and cleared his throat before speaking.

"At 0300, we were informed that President Loire received, what is believed to be, a death threat." Quistis narrowed her eyes at that unexpected information and Cid continued. "According to Vice President Kiros, an unmarked envelope arrived at the Presidential Palace. Inside was a letter, with a variety of pasted characters that spelled out the message."

"Do we have any suspects yet, sir?"

"None yet. We've decided not to open communication with Esthar at the moment, in case the perpetrator is smarter than most. It's easy to listen in, even on secure channels. So, because of our close relationship with President Loire, we've decided to send a team straight to Esthar to confer with him and his staff. You leave at 0600 tomorrow morning."

"Affirmative, sir. Who am I paired with on this mission? Squall?"

"Unfortunately, this time, we are leaving the Commander out. Because of his personal relationship with the President, he will not be assigned to this mission. However, we have a contracted agent available that Commander Leonhart has requested personally, that we reserve for only the most covert operations, that are likely to contain a high level of danger. The agent is also familiar with Esthar's layout, which will come in handy. Because of the agent's unique position, we can't tell you their identity right now. You'll be meeting them at Balamb's front gate tomorrow."

"Affirmative, sir. I am confident that they are skilled enough to see the mission through."

"Had the agent been an official SeeD member, they would have easily ranked A, if that helps to reassure you. Here is all of the information we have on the mission thus far. I expect you to look it over, prior to leaving in the morning," Cid explained, as he handed the manila envelope over to Quistis.

Her mind was reeling from all of the information and unanswered questions, and she was grateful that the Headmaster had given her time to process everything, before she had to meet her 'unknown' partner. She quickly saluted the Headmaster, before striding out of his office. She shut off her computer and piled all unfinished work in her inbox, before waving to Xu and heading back down to her dorm.

Once she was safely within the confines of her room, she unsealed the envelope and pulled out a stack of papers, with an information sheet clipped to the top. It listed her name, as well as the mission objective, which read: 'Ensure the safety of President Laguna Loire, at all times. Determine the main suspect behind the death threat.' It also contained a copy of the threat itself. The letters that formed the message, appeared to be cut out of various magazines and newspapers, then glued onto a standard eight and a half by eleven sheet of paper. The message itself was incredibly cryptic, though that didn't surprise Quistis in the slightest. Criminals were hardly known to spell things out clearly.

She shuffled through the call logs provided, marking any numbers that repeated often enough to catch her attention. They had also included discs that contained CCTV footage for the Palace over the past week, but that was something that was best sorted through with two sets of eyes, so she set that aside for later.

Hours passed as Quistis pored over the materials, until she glanced up at the clock and realized that it was nearly midnight. With a sigh, she placed all of the information back into the envelope, in the same order that she'd taken it out. Finally, she let herself wonder who exactly it was that she was to be paired with tomorrow. If she had been partnered with Zell, there would be no reason for her to walk all the way out to Balamb. Selphie and Irvine were both out of the picture-busy with Trabia's reconstruction, no doubt. The Headmaster had already discussed that Squall wasn't an option, and Rinoa being nearly five months pregnant took her out of the equation as well. It wouldn't be any of the original gang, of that she was certain. Quistis' last train of thought for the night drifted through her mind aimlessly, as she finally fell asleep.

_So who exactly does that leave?_

* * *

Quistis' anxiety refused to let her sleep and by 4:00 AM, she was already up. As she waited for her hair to dry, she quickly put on her SeeD uniform and stuffed some clothes into a duffel bag, as well as some bathroom necessities. It was hard, if not impossible, to say how long she'd be gone, so she figured it didn't hurt to be prepared. By the time she finished packing, her hair was still slightly damp so she pulled it up into her usual up-do, and clipped it into place. She grabbed her bag and headed out into the hall, sliding her card key into her pocket-she'd have to leave that with Xu for safekeeping while she was gone.

She traipsed through the quiet lobby towards to the parking garage, marveling at how peaceful Garden seemed to be after curfew. Though it had been her job to chase rebellious cadets out of the secret area in the training center in the late hours of the night, she couldn't fault them for wanting to have some peace and quiet. She herself had spent more time there than she could count over the past few years, trying to sort through her thoughts.

As she turned down the hallway from the lobby, she checked the time on her phone. White letters that read  _5:51 AM,_ blinked up at her and inwardly, she cringed. On time for Quistis was ten to fifteen minutes early and it drove her crazy that she was, in her mind, a minute late.

Xu was leaning against the hunter green and yellow transport vehicle, already waiting for her. When Quistis walked into the lot, Xu pushed off of the car and met her by the doorway.

"Hey," the brunette greeted in a brusque tone.

Quistis exhaled lightly and replied, "Hey. You're not still upset with me, are you?"

Xu rolled her eyes at the blonde. "No, not anymore. It's your life, Quistis. If you want to make stupid decisions, then fine. I'm just glad that you're even getting out at all. You're right, I know you can take care of yourself."

A smile teased at the corners of Quistis' lips and she nudged Xu with her shoulder. "Thank you, for being concerned. It means a lot."

Xu returned the smile before she held out her hand. "Key card to your room? I assume you want me to hang onto it for you."

Quistis pulled the card out of her pocket, and after she placed it in Xu's hand, she opened the split-hatch door of the car, placing her duffel bag inside. "So why am I meeting my partner at Balamb? Why don't we just take the Ragnarok to Esthar?"

"You  _are_ taking the Ragnarok. Squall will be dropping you off. Your partner is temporarily stationed in Balamb, and we didn't want him walking up to Garden. Kind of ruins the whole incognito thing if he comes waltzing in through our front door. Especially since people are bound to recognize him," Xu explained.

_Recognize him?_  "So it's a 'he'? Is he easy to notice or something?" Quistis probed.

At that, Xu scoffed and shook her head. " _Oh_  yeah. If it weren't for his appearance, his big mouth would get him noticed right away."

"O...kay...why can't you just tell me who he is?"

Once Xu shut the hatch doors, she turned and faced Quistis. With a level stare, she gazed at the blonde for a few seconds before she finally mumbled, "You'll see in a few minutes. Get in, I'll drive."

"Why do  _you_ always get to drive?"

About a half an hour later, they were just outside of Balamb's front gate, and Xu parked the car a few feet away from the town's limits. The girls climbed out and Quistis retrieved her bag from the trunk, before she joined Xu next to the hood.

"When is Squall coming?" Quistis asked.

Xu glanced at her wristwatch and said, "Should be here any minute. I'll call him, if you want to keep an eye out for your partner."

"Wait, I don't know what he looks like…" Quistis trailed off, as Xu got back into the driver's seat.

The brunette shouted back, "You'll recognize him, trust me!"

With a sigh, Quistis turned back to face Balamb, squinting her eyes so that she could see farther into the distance. A figure was approaching but it was still quite a ways out-probably down by the Hotel, if Quistis had to guess. Her foot tapped on the asphalt road as she watched the person slowly approach, and she crossed her arms tightly over her chest. As the person gradually started to come into focus, Quistis could at least pick out that the man had blonde hair that was closer to short than long, though it couldn't exactly be classified as such. He was wearing rather nondescript clothing: a white button up with dark pants. A long, ebony case of some sort was in his hand, but due to the distance, it was difficult to guess what it could be.

Xu finally clambered back out of the vehicle and sidled up to Quistis, leaning against the front end of the car. "Wow, he's taking his sweet time, isn't he?"

She hummed in affirmation and set her duffel bag down on the ground beside her, since her arm was starting to ache from the weight. The man was nearing the attendant booth now and Quistis squinted again. She knew she should've worn her glasses today, but she'd opted for contacts on the mission; it was obviously time to update her prescription.

When the figure's face finally came into focus and Quistis spotted the long, jagged scar that ran across his face, paired with his striking cerulean eyes, she gasped loudly in disbelief.

"You have  _got_  to be shitting me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Elhaym (thanks for the subscription as well!) and sheldem for the kudos and comments :D
> 
> Last bit of business, thanks to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading. Hope you enjoyed the chapter, would love to hear what you thought!


	7. Astriction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer and Quistis travel to Esthar and some developments occur while on the Ragnarok, both emotionally and in their mission.

* * *

**_Astrict:_ ** _to bind morally._

* * *

Quistis Trepe was not the type of woman who panicked. She prided herself on always remaining calm and collected, someone that the team could rely on as their pillar of strength. Even if something did frighten her, or if she worried about the way a mission was carried out, she never voiced her doubts. Trusting the Commander, one-hundred percent, was something that she always tried to do.

But in this particular moment, with Seifer Almasy standing right in front of her as her partner for the mission to Esthar, she was definitely panicking. And as far as trusting Squall? Right now, all she wanted to do was wrap her slender fingers around his neck and squeeze until he went blue.

Seifer also seemed to be having a hard time with this new development because he just stood there, staring at Quistis in disbelief.

"What the  _hell_  is going on?" he demanded, his fingers tightening around the handle of the long, ebony leather case that he carried.

Now that he was no longer an unknown figure in the distance, she could surmise that the case he carried likely housed Hyperion. It was much more discreet than just carrying it over his shoulder, so she supposed she was grateful for his foresight. Maybe. If she had to be honest with herself right now, she didn't particularly want to give him any credit for anything.

Xu narrowed her eyes at Seifer before she replied, "Watch your tone, Almasy. You're not in a position to select your own partner, and Quistis was chosen by the Commander himself."

Seifer sneered at her harsh response and his cerulean eyes swiveled over to Quistis. "Didn't think I'd be seeing you again so soon. You're not happy with this either, right?"

At his mention of their previous encounter, Quistis blushed and cleared her throat, hoping that Xu hadn't noticed Seifer's implication and put two and two together yet.

"  _I_  can request a new partner, right? I'm not going to Esthar with  _him_ ," Quistis said as she pointed at Seifer, which made him scoff at her thinly-veiled disgust.

The assistant Headmaster sighed, as she rolled her eyes. "Neither of you can request a new partner for this mission. Commander Leonhart requested that the  _two of you_  go. Sorry. It is what it is. If you have a problem with it, you can take it up with him when he arrives."

"Don't worry, I will. Speaking of which, where is puberty boy?"

"Don't call him that to his face. He should be here in a few minutes. I'm returning to Garden, so good luck to the both of you," Xu stated, her voice firm, as she climbed back into the vehicle and started the engine.

Quistis glanced over at Seifer who was watching Xu's departure, his arms crossed over his chest. Before Xu turned the car completely around, she waved to Quistis, who returned the gesture. Within a few minutes, only the white smoke from the car's exhaust remained.

Now that the sound of the engine had faded, cricket chirps were all that filled the air. Quistis tried to concentrate on the sound of the waves from the nearby beach, instead of the awkward silence. When she moved over to sit down on her duffle bag, Seifer finally spoke.

"So, how was the walk of shame back to Garden, huh? Must have been better than having to deal with me in the morning, considering you left and all," he needled, his voice low and rough. His voice only got that way when he was beyond irritated, and she cringed in anticipation at how this conversation would most likely go.

"I'm sorry. My deadline was only a few hours away, so I couldn't wait," she said, attempting to sound authoritative.

"Please, Instructor. You can fool Xu with your bullshit, but I ain't buyin' it."

Quistis glared up at Seifer and mumbled, "It's not exactly bullshit. I did have a deadline."

"Yeah, okay. If that's what you gotta keep telling yourself to help you fuckin' sleep at night."

"Excuse me? Why are you being so rude? I am really not in the mood to put up with you right now," she said, shaking her head.

"Put up with me? Oh, is that what you were doing at the bar, when I spilled my fucking guts to you about the shit I went through? Is that what you were doing when we were in  _my_  fucking hotel room?  _Putting up with me_? Hyne, Quistis. If you didn't want to talk to me or fucking  _suck face_ , all you had to do was just say so," he ranted.

A laugh threatened to creep up Quistis' throat and she pressed her lips together, in an attempt to stifle the sound. Seifer narrowed his eyes at her and in a low voice, asked, "Are you...are you seriously fuckin' laughing at me, right now?"

"No, no I'm not. I just...suck face?"

"You know what Trepe, fuck you," he spat, before he turned around and put his back to her.

His shoulders were heaving up and down with the massive breaths he took; he was likely trying to calm himself down. Quistis marveled at how quickly his hackles rose. That was one aspect of his personality that would probably never change.

Looking away from him, she ran her fingers through her hair, only to have them get caught in the tangles. With a sigh of frustration, she eventually gave up and after nearly fifteen minutes of silence had passed, she glanced up at him and opened her mouth to apologize. It was then that the roar of the Ragnarok's jets reached their ears and they both turned to face the sound.

The red, dragon-shaped vessel landed beside the beach and its cargo ramp lowered, revealing Squall as he descended, his hand above his eyes to shield them from the sun. When he spotted the duo standing a ways away, he waved his hand to beckon them closer.

Quistis bent down to grab her bag and Seifer brushed past her, stalking towards the ship, his posture rigid and unyielding. A dejected sigh left her lips and she traipsed after him. If that was the attitude he was going to have the entire time they were on this mission, it was going to be even worse than she'd first imagined.

Seifer and Squall nodded at each other, and the blond gunbladist disappeared into the bowels of the airship. When Quistis sidled up to Squall, their eyes met and in a dry voice, she asked, "Seifer? Really?"

Squall shrugged and said, "I know. But he  _is_ good at what he does, and you'll need that in Esthar."

Quistis hummed a noncommittal response, before she followed the same path that Seifer had. As she made her way through the ship, she wondered if Rinoa had come along. It'd been weeks since they'd spoken, and the guilt that she harbored, knowing she still hadn't apologized to her friend, was ever present at the back of her mind. She was confident that she and Seifer were able to see this mission through, but it never hurt to get all your chocobos in a row beforehand. Goodbyes were important, apologies equally so, and Quistis wanted to make sure she had the chance to do that before the mission began.

Finally, Quistis wandered into the passenger room and froze when she realized that Seifer had also ended up here. He and Rinoa were talking on the other end of the room, and when the door slid open, they both glanced up at her.

Rinoa smiled, though it was with hesitation, and Quistis responded in kind, as she set her bag down on one of the chairs in the back. The sorceress ambled over to her and Seifer rolled his eyes at them, before turning to look out the window. Quistis had forgotten that she'd confided in him about the little bump in hers and Rinoa's relationship. Even though they were at odds at the moment, Quistis appreciated his attempt at giving them a bit of privacy.

"Hi Quisty," Rinoa greeted, her voice quiet and reticent.

"Hi…" Quistis trailed off and she grasped the younger woman's hands in her own, before continuing. "Rinoa I...I'm sorry about what I said to you that day. It was horrible of me to assume that I knew how you felt, and I shouldn't have gone there."

Rinoa's dark locks swayed from side to side as she shook her head. "Quistis, it's okay. I forgave you ages ago. You had the flu and you were upset. People say things they don't mean all the time," she replied, as she waved her hand in the air in a nonchalant manner.

"Oh good," Quistis said, and her smile widened in relief.

Rinoa pulled her into a tight hug then, and Quistis squeaked in surprise before wrapping her arms around her friend. They stayed in that position for a few moments, giggling to themselves about how silly girls could be. Squall walked into the room and raised an eyebrow at them. They separated, smiling at each other, before Rinoa drifted over to stand beside Squall.

"Almasy," Squall called out.

Seifer turned and glared at Squall, before coming up to stand beside Quistis. She tried to look over at him, but he adamantly refused to meet her gaze. Her ice-blue eyes shifted to the floor, before returning to Squall's face. Rinoa had apparently noticed the tension and she tilted her head at Quistis in a silent question. The blue mage shook her head at the sorceress and mouthed 'later'.

Squall's steel-blue eyes focused on Quistis and he asked, "You brought the mission information, right?"

She nodded and unzipped her bag, pulling out the manila envelope that she'd received from Headmaster Cid.

Squall gestured to the electronic panel on the far end of the room. "You can use the computer up there to watch the CCTV footage. I'm going to head up to the cockpit so we can take off and get to Esthar on time. Should be a couple of hours until we arrive."

With that, he left the room and Seifer stomped back over to the panel. Rinoa trailed after Squall, but paused in the doorway and glanced back at Quistis, her warm, chocolate-brown eyes full of concern.

"I'm fine, Rin. I'll talk to you later," Quistis reassured.

Rinoa's eyes flickered over to Seifer and back, before she nodded and walked out, and the electronic door slid shut behind her. Quistis exhaled softly before she strode over to join Seifer. He'd sat down in the chair on the left and had his heavy boots propped up on the panel. Quistis sank down onto the opposite chair and pulled everything out of the envelope. The Ragnarok's engine roared to life again and the landscape in front of them fell away as they rose into the air.

"Have you seen any of the information yet?" she asked, pulling her gaze away from the window.

Seifer shook his head and laced his fingers together behind his head. "Nope. Got the call late last night, remember? Haven't seen anything or heard anything about the mission."

Quistis' organized tendencies took over then and she nudged his legs out of the way, so that she could place all the paperwork in neat piles on top of the console. Opening the clear case that held the disc with the camera footage, she opened the disc tray and placed it inside, pushing it shut. When the video started to play, she paused it and turned to face Seifer.

"Okay, let's go through this in order and save the footage for last. In front of you is the copy of the actual death threat. Want to start there?"

Seifer chose not to answer her and picked up the piece of paper instead. His bright eyes narrowed in concentration and he brought his hand up to his face, propping it against his knuckles.

She reached over and picked up the second copy so that she could re-read it. She'd been sleep deprived last night, so a refresher couldn't hurt.

 

_PreSident Lo ire,_

_The PasT is often best left ForgotTen. TheRe are feW who have The luXury of doing so, HowevEr._

_You Will nOt be one of those Lucky few._

_For the CriMe you commiTted against my family, I will rEsponD in KIND._

_NoW would be A good Time to say goodBye to those you love._

 

"This is morbid as fuck," Seifer muttered.

His comment caused Quistis to snort, which earned her a glare from his direction.

"Aren't death threats usually morbid?" she asked.

"Fair enough," he said, as he set the letter back down. He reached over and picked up the stapled stack of papers that Quistis recognized as the call log.

"I already went through and highlighted the numbers that I noticed repeated more often than others. I figured we could trace them and see how they're connected to Laguna, if at all," she explained.

Seifer nodded as he flipped through the pages, his eyes lingering on the numbers she'd highlighted.

"Are we sure the old man doesn't have a girlfriend?" he asked, which made Quistis chuckle under her breath.

Seifer's eyebrows furrowed as he stared her down. "I was being serious."

She waved his comment aside and said, "I know, I'm sorry. Just the thought of Laguna managing to get a girlfriend...it's humorous."

"You know what, you're welcome. I'm tryin' over here. That's one option at least though, yeah?"

She shrugged as she set her copy of the letter down. "Yes, anything is possible. But I'm sure he would have mentioned it. We can clarify that when we see him, if you think it's important enough to keep in mind."

He tossed the stack of papers back down onto the console and gestured to the monitor. "Let's watch this shit."

Quistis reached over and pressed play, and the black and white security footage resumed. "Great, there's no audio," she mumbled.

"It'd be hard to hear over the engine jets anyway. Did you bring a notepad?" he asked.

"Yeah, in my bag," she replied, as she rose from the chair and hurried to the other side of the room. She ran back with a yellow legal pad in her hand, as well as a pen, and handed it over to Seifer, before sinking back down into her chair.

Silence fell again and she crossed her arms and legs, feeling uncomfortable at their close proximity. She knew she should be focused only on the mission, but she couldn't help but wonder what was going through Seifer's mind right now, as they sat beside each other. Was he wondering why she'd walked out on him the other morning? He'd asked about it before the Ragnarok had arrived, but it was hard for her to gauge whether he actually cared. If he probed her on the subject, was she willing to admit the real reason?

She glanced over at him out of the corner of her eye, and her mouth fell open when she saw that he was scribbling away. "Did you notice something  _already_?"

He looked up at her from underneath his lowered brows and with disdain in his voice, asked, "Have you even been watching, Trepe? This same guy's walked past the main door like three times on different days."

"Which guy?" she asked, her voice high pitched due to her surprise.

"Oh for the love of...rewind like two or three minutes."

"Sorry. I was thinking about something else," she muttered.

"Clearly. Okay, stop. See that guy, in the corner? Sportin' a leather jacket with the cap blocking his face?"

"This one?" she clarified, as she placed her finger on the screen, hovering over the individual that Seifer had described.

"Yeah, him. Hit play again and keep an eye out for him."

"Okay…" she trailed off, as she pressed the play button again.

This time, her eyes were glued to the screen as she watched for the same guy to make an appearance again. When they'd gone through another 24 hours of footage and he still hadn't reappeared, she scoffed in frustration.

"I didn't see him," she said.

"Get your head in the game, Quistis, shit. Rewind again. He's over on the right side this time."

"You don't have to be so condescending, Seifer," she said, from between clenched teeth.

"It's not my fault you're terrible at paying attention. Aren't you supposed to be one of the best SeeDs? Beats me how you got there."

"Says the guy who didn't pass," she threw back at him.

"We both know I had the  _skills_  to pass."

"Yes, but you still didn't. You tried, what, three times?"

"Wow, Trepe. That was an impressive insult. But considering you were my instructor, I think that says more about you than it does about me."

Quistis chose to stop responding, in the hopes that he would give up on trying to rile her up. He'd always enjoyed doing that, and she hated that she rose to the bait every single time. She kept her gaze focused on the monitor, trying to keep her mind on the task at hand, until he spoke again.

"So Trepe, how  _is_  teaching going? You pick it up again yet? Because it's pretty obvious that you failed. Guess we're in the same boat, huh?" Seifer asked, his tone hostile.

Obviously he hadn't decided to let it go like she thought he had. A sharp spike of anger seared through her then, and she yelled, "Seriously, Seifer? Will you stop talking, so that I can concentrate!?"

"Yeah, 'cause you're so good at it even without me distracting you."

Quistis turned and glared at Seifer, her fingers clenched so tightly around the edge of the console, that her knuckles were turning white. He threw up his hands in a defensive gesture, mockingly zipping his lips together. She clenched her jaw and turned away from him, looking back at the monitor.

This time, she noticed the man on the right side of the screen who stood with the exact same posture as the man from before. However, he was wearing different clothing in the footage from this particular day. She fast forwarded through the next couple of days, mentally cataloging that the same individual had walked past the front doors of the Presidential Palace at least once, every other day.

"Tell me that he can't be that stupid?" Seifer quipped.

"Criminals have predictable patterns, even if they don't realize it. He's scoping out the entrance, and he keeps glancing up at the windows. What's his plan?" Quistis mumbled to herself, her anger momentarily forgotten.

"Shit. He keeps his back to the cameras and always wears a hat, so that it hides his face. Why can't they ever make it easy for us?" Seifer asked.

"Speaking of which-" Quistis began, as she continued to watch the footage roll by on the monitor, "-since when were you a 'contracted agent' for Garden?"

"Yeah, I'm surprised they were able to keep that a secret from  _you_ , of all people. Hyne knows you're nosy enough. Anyway, since the trial. One of the rules of my pardon was that I remain under Garden's supervision 'at all times'," he said in a mocking tone, as he threw up quotation marks at the end.

She turned back to look at him, her gaze searching his face. "How many missions have they assigned to you so far?"

"Three."

"In three years? Is this the third?"

"Yep."

"They told me they chose you because you're familiar with Esthar's layout. I should've figured," she said in a quiet voice.

Seifer scoffed then before he muttered, "Yeah, like they'd ever forget that I hijacked Lunatic Pandora and set fire to the city, right?"

A beat passed before Quistis asked softly, "Do you wish  _you_ could forget?"

His eyes met hers and he stared at her, his gaze heated, before he replied, "Forget it. Let's drop it."

With a nod from Quistis, Seifer adjusted the notepad on his lap and went back to staring at the monitor. They watched the rest of the footage in silence, with Seifer scribbling away every few seconds, and Quistis tapping her fingers on the console. She could smell his cologne from her seat, and the spicy, masculine scent made her head swim.

Squall's voice came over the intercom unexpectedly, making Quistis jump in her seat. "We'll be landing in Esthar in about fifteen minutes. Get ready."

Under her breath, she muttered how it didn't seem like it'd been that long and reached up to stop the footage, ejecting the drive and placing the disc back in its case. She tucked everything back into the manila envelope and rose from her seat, ambling back over to her bag and placing the envelope securely inside. After zipping it back up afterwards, she turned around and jumped when she saw that Seifer was standing right behind her.

"Hyne, Seifer. Don't sneak up on people like that," she gasped. The smell of his cologne was wafting over her again and she felt lightheaded when she breathed it in.

"We gonna talk about the other night?" he asked.

"I...w-what do you want to talk about? I mean, what could we possibly say? We were drunk, things escalated," she rambled.

"That's for damn sure. You were the one trying to get in  _my_  pants."

"What?! No, that's not...that's not true," she said indignantly.

"You do know that when people are drunk, they tend to be more honest, right?"

"What is that supposed to mean?"

He stepped closer to her, causing her to back up and brace herself against the side of the seat, and she tried to lean away from him. He placed his hands on the armrest, on either side of her body as he hovered over her. At an extremely slow pace, he lowered his head down, bringing his face closer to hers. Quistis's heart rate picked up and her quick breaths caused her chest to rise and fall, faster than usual.

When he was close enough that she could feel his breath on her lips, without realizing what she was doing, she tilted her face up towards his. From under heavy-lidded eyes, she saw the corner of his mouth curl upwards.

It was then that he muttered, "No one likes a liar, Trepe," before he straightened and walked out of the room, leaving an astonished Quistis behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many thanks to Layla Evercrest and Arenoptara for beta-reading, as always.


	8. Influence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer and Quistis arrive in Esthar and more tension builds between them.

* * *

_**Influence** : the power of persons to be a compelling force on the actions, behavior, opinions of others._

* * *

  _What the hell was that supposed to be?_  Quistis thought, as the doors slid shut behind Seifer.

Her heart was still pounding from the unexpected confrontation and she pressed the heel of her palm into her chest in an attempt to calm herself down. Perhaps confrontation was too strong of a word but...what exactly had Seifer been trying to do with that little stunt?

The Ragnarok shook as it touched down on Esthar's landing pad, and she braced herself on the chair's armrest again. Once the ship had settled, she straightened and picked up her duffel bag, slinging it over her shoulder. Still flustered, she hastily strode out of the room and tried to smooth her hair down as much as possible. Just when she stepped out into the hallway, the elevator from the cockpit descended with Squall and Rinoa on it, and the trio followed Seifer out into the hangar.

The realization that Squall and Rinoa were getting off as well hit Quistis then and she turned to Squall. "Wait, I thought you guys aren't allowed to come with us on the mission?"

Squall opened his mouth to reply only to have Rinoa lean around him and explain, "We won't be here long. We're just going to visit with Laguna for a day or two, then go back."

"Ah, I see. Well that will be nice," Quistis replied as they walked into the boarding room.

Squall snorted as he pressed the button to lower the ramp. "Nice. That's one word for it."

Rinoa smacked him on the side of the arm, a slight frown on her face. "Squall! He's your father. We have to visit every now and then."

"Whatever."

As they waited and the sound of the hydraulics working filled the room, Seifer piped up to say, "By the way, Leonhart, you fuckin' suck at flying this thing. That was the worst landing I've ever had the shitty luck to sit through."

Rinoa covered her mouth in an attempt to hide her giggle, and Quistis sighed as she shook her head. Squall looked over at Seifer and narrowed his eyes before responding, "Go to hell, Almasy."

"Been there, done that," the other man commented as he stomped down the now-lowered ramp.

Squall sighed before he muttered, "Remind me why we keep him around?"

The corners of Quistis' lips curled upwards and she said, "Because he's good at what he does, remember?"

Squall simply shook his head in response to Quistis throwing his statement from yesterday back at him, and the trio followed Seifer down the ramp. They made their way through the air station and when they reached the front entrance, Rinoa reprimanded, "You know, he's a lot better than he used to be. You two don't give him enough credit."

Quistis glanced over at the sorceress in shock, before she replied, "I'm surprised you're defending him, Rinoa."

With a quick glance to check that the street was clear, they crossed and just before they walked through the sliding glass doors of the car rental terminal, Rinoa said, "Well, we've spoken here and there since everything happened and...he seems more like the Seifer I knew before things went bad. But you know, older. I mean, you can tell he's changed. But everyone gives him such a hard time,  _all_ the time, that I think it's difficult for him to move on."

They finally caught up to Seifer who was standing next to the car rental panel. He must have already requested a car because the platform was already gone, and once they stepped up beside him, it reappeared with a low, silver and blue vehicle perched on top.

After they tossed their bags into the trunk and climbed inside, with Squall behind the wheel and Rinoa in the front passenger seat, the platform spun them around. The gate to the terminal opened, and the automatic ramp propelled them out onto the streets of Esthar. Once they reached the end of the ramp, Squall accelerated and they were on their way to the Presidential Palace.

As the city flew past them, Quistis took the time to gaze up at the skyscrapers that formed the Estharian skyline. The events of the Lunar Cry three years ago had devastated the city, and Quistis could still remember the disturbing crimson shade of the sky that day. The monsters had destroyed nearly all the buildings, reducing them down to rubble, and countless bodies had lined the streets.

Estharians were resilient though, and they'd rebuilt quickly. Much of that was thanks to Laguna's never ending determination and positivity. The streets had long since been repaired and the reflective blue surface shined in the sunlight, as their car sped across.

Quistis glanced over at Seifer, who was gazing out the opposite window. If she was having a hard time with the memories of the past, she couldn't even begin to imagine how he must be feeling at the moment.

His eyebrows were furrowed, causing his forehead to crease up. He had his chin propped up on his palm, with his knuckles curled into his cheek. His other hand was in his lap, with fingers clenched just as tight. The look on his face was a mixture of irritation and discomfort, as if this were the last place he wanted to be-which was probably exactly the case.

Hesitantly, Quistis reached out and touched Seifer's hand to get his attention, and when her fingertips brushed against the side of his hand, he quickly pulled it away. Embarrassed that she'd even tried to reach out to him, she leaned back in her seat and he placed his hand back in his lap as he mumbled, "Sorry, reflex."

"It's okay. Are you...doing alright?"

"Fine," he said shortly.

With cheeks flushed with chagrin, Quistis nodded and turned to look out her own window. The city rushed by far too quickly for her to focus on anything in particular and she zoned out, lost in her own thoughts.

_Never thought I'd try to comfort_ Seifer. _Maybe Rinoa is right about him having a hard time. Or maybe her infinite optimism is just rubbing off on me,_ she thought, in an attempt to justify her actions.

Eventually, the car slowed and she glanced up, spotting the Presidential Palace's massive facade looming up ahead. A valet attendant was waving them over to the side of the cul-de-sac, and Squall maneuvered the vehicle right in front him.

The group climbed out as the attendant approached Squall and bowed slightly. In a jovial tone, he greeted, "Welcome to the Presidential Palace! If you would like to hand me your key, I can park your vehicle safely in our garage."

"Actually it's a rental, so if you just want to return it, that'd be fine," Squall explained, as he placed the keys in the attendant's outstretched hand.

With another bow, the attendant replied, "Of course, sir. Please check in at the security desk just through the front doors."

The man trailed away, back towards the valet stand, and Seifer grabbed their bags out of the trunk, slinging one over each of his shoulders.

Quistis huffed in annoyance and said, "I can carry my own bag."

Ignoring her, he followed Squall and Rinoa through the Palace's courtyard, forcing her to trail after him. She rolled her eyes at his back, and the group walked through the Palace's front doors.

Esthar's architecture had always been more futuristic, and the Presidential Palace was no exception. The grand entrance foyer had a transparent glass floor, with golden lines running through that divided it into large sections. Overhead hung an enormous copper light fixture with tubes of crystal dispersed in random disarray, and the sunbeams that shone through the pieces reflected patterns onto the floor. Esthar's moon symbol rested on a plaque in the center of the room, just in front of a desk where a woman in a crisp dress suit stood. Identical staircases flanked her that led up to a balcony directly above.

When the group approached, she also bowed and with a smile, said, "Welcome Commander Leonhart. We've been expecting you. As always, you are allowed to bypass the security check. Vice President Kiros will be waiting for you upstairs, just down the first hallway."

Squall nodded his thanks and the four of them ascended to the second floor. As the receptionist had promised, Kiros, who hadn't appeared to age a day, awaited them at the end of the long hall. His dark skin glistened in the light and his hair, save for the beaded dreadlocks that ran down his back, was still cropped short. His dark eyes were also as sharp as ever. Instead of his maroon leather uniform that he used to wear in battle, he now sported a tight fitting suit that he'd had tailored to allow for as little extra space as possible.

He bowed in acknowledgment and when he straightened, his deep, soothing voice called out to them. "Good to see you all again."

Rinoa closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around him in a tight hug. She leaned back and smiled up at him. "No need to be so formal, Kiros! It's good to see you, too."

Kiros chuckled as he turned and nodded at Squall, who returned the gesture. His friendly countenance faltered when he spotted Seifer, who stood just behind the Commander. Estharians didn't forget easily, and Kiros was no exception.

"Mr. Almasy. I trust that you will be on your best behavior while you are in our city?"

Seifer's lip curled a little, before he schooled his expression into something more neutral. With a grunt, he replied, "Yeah, I'll behave."

Kiros nodded as his lips tightened into a thin line. With another polite nod in Quistis' direction, he turned and led them through the next set of doors, their footsteps padding loudly on the plush carpet, until they reached the main room that branched off into the presidential quarters.

"Laguna is currently in a meeting, but he should be finishing up in the next few minutes. Squall, if you and Rinoa want to wait here, I can show them where their rooms are," Kiros explained.

Kiros proceeded down the hallway to their left, beckoning for Quistis and Seifer to follow him. Quistis waved to Rinoa, who was wandering over to the couches along the wall, before trailing after Kiros and Seifer.

"We couldn't put you in the presidential quarters, but we have plenty of space in the guest hall. I hope that will be satisfactory."

Seifer's eyebrow raised and when he opened his mouth to speak, Quistis piped up immediately to interrupt him, so that he wouldn't have the chance to say something sarcastic. "Of course. We appreciate you housing us at all."

Kiros glanced over his shoulder and with a grim expression on his face, replied, "No,  _we_ are in your debt. Laguna is...well, he's Laguna. We never would've thought he'd receive such a threat and it worries me. We couldn't be more grateful for your help."

He came to a stop then, gesturing to a set of doors on their left. Quistis gently laid a hand on his arm and reassured, "Even if Squall and Laguna weren't related, we still would have come."

The older man smiled and tilted his head in a small nod, before saying, "Feel free to get settled in and explore the city, if you wish. We'll go over the mission details tomorrow at 0600. I think Laguna wanted to spend some time with Squall and Rinoa before they leave."

"Yes, that's perfect. Thank you, Kiros," Quistis said.

After Kiros headed back the way they came, Quistis glanced over at Seifer who was staring at her.

"What?" she prompted.

He shook his head. "Nothing. You want your bag now?"

"That was unnecessary. I could have carried it myself."

"Back to being formal, huh?" he quipped.

Quistis' eyebrows scrunched together and the corners of her lips turned down slightly. "No, I-"

He interrupted her to say, "Never mind. I'll see you in the morning," before opening his door and heading into his room.

Quistis reached out and planted her hand against his door, stopping it just before it closed. In a rush, she asked, "Wait! Did you not want to go and get some dinner later tonight?"

She cringed at the desperate, breathless tone of her voice. Her question had slipped out before she could catch herself and now, she was having a foot-in-mouth moment. Why she'd even asked was beyond her. It's not as if they regularly saw each other or spent time together. Lately, it'd been an exception, not the rule. Knowing Seifer, he also would never let her live this down.

Seifer turned back around as he tossed his bag onto the floor. With a raised eyebrow he teased, "Is that you asking me on a date, Trepe?"

_I_ _**knew** _ _he'd say something like that…_

The insinuation made her stammer, as she said, "N-No, I just meant that we need food and...I didn't want to assume that Laguna would feed us."

"Yeah well, I like to avoid going out into the city as much as possible. Estharians don't like me much, remember?" he asked, as his smirk fell into the same neutral expression he'd worn earlier, when Kiros had reminded him to be on his best behavior.

"Seifer…"

"I'm good, Quistis. I'll see you tomorrow. I'm gonna change into something more comfortable, so you might want to get out of here," he said, as he walked over to shut the door.

She sputtered at his response and he winked before closing the door in her face.

Quistis closed her eyes, letting out a long exhale. He seemed upset. The tone of his voice when he'd tried to joke about Estharians' attitudes towards him, and the way that his face fell...She had to admit that it made her chest feel heavy. It was uncomfortable, knowing that he tried to hide the way he felt behind jokes and a tough exterior. It was also upsetting that she knew him well enough by now to recognize when he was doing it.

She couldn't help but feel like a terrible person for not asking him about it. Were they friends now? No, friends seemed like too strong of a word. They'd have each other's backs during this mission, but that was essentially their jobs. A friend cared about the other person's well-being. Did she care?

_Who am I kidding? I wouldn't be asking myself if I cared, if I didn't already_ , she thought bitterly.

With nothing else to do, she let herself into the room beside Seifer's, copying his action from earlier and tossing her duffel bag on to the floor. She stretched her arms above her head and leaned from side to side until she felt, as well as heard, her back pop.

Changing into something more comfortable did sound appealing and so she unzipped her salmon-pink vest,shrugged out of it, and her sepia-toned leather sleeves off as well. Kneeling down next to her bag, she shuffled through her things until she found the sheer, lightweight hoodie she'd had the foresight to bring. She hastily changed into her favorite black lace bralette and a sheer sweater, tugging on the hood when it got caught on her upturned hair. After yanking a pair of black leggings on, she stood and placed her hands on her hips.

A quick glance at her phone's locked screen showed that it was just after noon. While she hated to waste half of the day lounging around in her room, she wasn't sure if she was in the mood to go explore the city by herself. So instead, she ordered some lunch from the kitchen. After specifying that she also wanted an eight ounce steak for dinner, delivered promptly at seven, she placed the phone back in its cradle and sank down onto the bed.

_Now what do I do for the rest of the day?_

Her lunch was delivered a prompt half hour later and she scarfed it down. Once she was full, she proceeded to mull over the mission materials inside of the envelope for the next couple of hours. Afterwards, she turned on the television and stared blankly at the screen for another two hours.

Towards the end of the day, she went through her daily workout routine which ended with a few yoga poses, set to the backdrop of the Estharian skyline as the sun began to set. She preferred to do yoga either at sunrise or sunset, because the variety of colors that painted the sky relaxed her. The scenery in Balamb was beautiful, but so was Esthar.

By then, her dinner arrived and she took her time while enjoying the prime cut of steak that she'd ordered. Sometimes, it was nice having friends in high places. Quistis could swear that the fact that she didn't have to pay for such a high quality steak, made it taste that much better.

Hoping that she'd wasted enough of the day and could finally go to bed, she checked the time on her phone and groaned when it read  _9:08 P.M_. Quistis made it a point to wake up at exactly 5:30 every morning, and go to sleep at 9:30, every night. It would drive her crazy to break that habit by just shy of a half an hour.

Luckily, the Presidential Palace was well equipped for guests and the each one of the individual suites had private balconies that overlooked the city. It was there that Quistis now headed to waste a bit more time.

She swept the curtains aside and pulled the sliding glass door open, stepping out into the cool, Estharian night. The weather was perfect for what she'd changed into, but every so often, a stronger wind blew past and she crossed her arms over her chest to trap in her body heat. As Quistis stood there on the balcony and gazed out at the bright lights that twinkled below her, she found that her thoughts drifted from the mission to Seifer.

With every mission, she always hoped for the best. SeeDs aimed for efficiency above all else, so it was her goal to make sure that they finished this as fast as possible. After the briefing in the morning, she wanted to get to work checking out all the leads that they'd come across while on the Ragnarok. Though Seifer had never officially become a SeeD, he had many of the same tendencies and she hoped that he was on the same page that she was. Like she'd said to Kiros, regardless of Laguna and Squall's relationship, they would've treated this mission with the utmost importance. The fact that that relationship did exist however, simply expedited the process. If Laguna was in danger, she'd do her damndest to find out who was behind it.

As for Seifer…

Quistis glanced over to his balcony and found that he'd opened the curtains as well. He hadn't been lying earlier when he said that he was going to get undressed and was currently wandering around his room with nothing but a white towel tied around his waist. His back was to the door and she could see that a plethora of scars marred his tan skin, crisscrossing all the way down to the towel's edge.

Seifer turned slightly, the muscles in his calves flexing to support his sudden shift in weight. The sight triggered images of him in the shower—water running down his developed physique—to flash through her mind. Quistis flushed but her eyes remained focused on him, drinking in visuals that she never thought she'd see.

He grabbed the edge of the towel and her mind didn't have a chance to catch up to what she should have known was going to happen. Next thing she knew, the towel was off and tossed aside, leaving Seifer as naked as the day he was born.

As soon as her mind processed that she was staring at his rather firm ass, she gasped. He bent at the waist slightly to pick something up off of the bed and his massive thigh muscles went taut. When he started to turn to the side, Quistis realized that she was about to get a front row seat to the all access Seifer pass, and with what could closely be described as a squeal, she yanked the patio door back open and jumped inside her room.

_Oh Hyne, I hope he didn't see me!_

With an embarrassed huff, she stripped out of the rest of her clothes except for her pullover, turned out the lights and clambered into bed. She shut her eyes, trying to will her thoughts away from naked Seifer and concentrated on slowing her breathing. When a half an hour had passed and she was nowhere near falling asleep, she threw the covers aside with a frustrated groan. Padding over to her bag, she sifted through it for the sleeping pills that Dr. Kadowaki had prescribed to her a few months ago.

She tried to avoid using them since they left her groggy for most of the next day. But there was no way she was falling asleep with the mental image of a completely nude Seifer refusing to leave her alone. In her opinion, she was acting like an infatuated teenager, and that frustrated her. She was an adult and was perfectly in control of her own thoughts and actions. With that mantra running through her mind, she quickly shook out two of the pills from the little orange bottle and headed into the bathroom to get some water. After tossing them back, she climbed back into bed and double checked that her alarm was set for 5:30 AM.

She hadn't exactly been tired when she got into bed but now that the lights were off and she was laying there in silence, she found that she was wide awake. Her pills wouldn't be kicking in for some time.

The image of Seifer's face from earlier, crestfallen and closed off, flashed into her mind—replacing the more recent, more suggestive version of him—and she rubbed her temples, trying to force the visual away.

With a frustrated sigh, she threw the covers back and got out of bed. Shoving her feet into a pair of flats that she'd brought along, she yanked her door open and went over to Seifer's room. Right before her fist made contact with the door, she hesitated.

_Is he even awake? He'll probably tell me that I'm being nosy if I so much as ask him how he's doing…_

Before she had the chance to change her mind, his door opened and she jumped, caught in the act. She noticed that he'd gotten dressed in a plain white shirt paired with jeans. Which wasn't a bad thing—or so she  _should have_  thought.

When Seifer saw her standing there, her hand poised in mid-air, he raised an eyebrow at her before a smile slowly spread across his face. "You tryin' to sneak into my room, Trepe?"

Quistis snapped her arm back to her side and stuttered, "No! Hyne you almost gave me a heart attack. I just wanted to check in with you about the briefing tomorrow."

"What about it?"

"It's at 0600."

"Yeah, I know. That's what that guy said earlier, right?"

"Kiros."

"Right, so...why you reminding me?" he demanded as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Didn't think I'd wake up on time or something? I'm not a kid anymore, Hyne."

"I just wanted to make sure you knew," she muttered.

"You  _sure_  you weren't tryin' to sneak in and catch me naked or something?"

"What? Why in the  _world_  would I do  _that_?!"

"Well you  _were_  watching me change earlier."

At that, Quistis sputtered as a blush spread across her cheeks. Of  _course_  he'd seen her. He was trained to be observant. It would've surprised her if he  _hadn't_ seen her out on the patio, what with his curtains wide open. Mentally, she kicked herself for hoping for the impossible.

"I-I wasn't  _watching_  you. I just...I was standing on my patio and you...whatever, that's not why I came over here!" she stammered, due to being flustered.

"Woah, no need to be so defensive, Trepe. It's alright if you've got the hots for me. I know my reputation precedes me," he teased, the corner of his mouth curving up into a smirk.

"Seifer!"

He sighed as he leaned against the doorframe, his hand held out to prop the door open. "Great, you're breakin' out the 'Instructor' tone. If that's not why you came over here, then what? Spit it out, I don't got all night."

Quistis huffed and placed her hands on her hips as she spoke. "I came over here to ask about how you were feeling."

"Uh, fine?"

"No, not physically. I mean, how are you dealing with being here? In Esthar?"

"What is this, a therapy session? I'm  _fine_  Trepe. I told you that earlier."

"Seifer."

"Will you stop that?! I'm not gonna fuckin' pour my guts out to you because you break out the  _tone_."

"No, you just need a bottle of whisky in you for you to act like an actual human being, don't you?" she retorted.

His eyes narrowed at her. "The amount of alcohol it would take for that to happen would kill me. But bravo, Instructor. Your comebacks are improving."

"Seifer! I am  _trying_  to be compassionate. It can't be easy being here again. I saw how upset you were earlier. I'm just telling you that I'm here if you want to talk about it."

He sneered at her before replying, "I'm not a fuckin' girl. I don't want to talk about  _shit_  and I don't want your  _pity_. Besides, you were being  _real_  compassionate when you skipped out on me the other day, after I did exactly what you're asking me to do again. What makes you think I'd want to tell you anything now?" he ranted, as he let go of the door and brushed past her into the hallway.

She let out a deep sigh before she followed him. "I'm not asking out of pity, Seifer!"

He stopped abruptly in the middle of the hall and she nearly crashed right into him, before he turned and faced her. "What the hell do you want me to say, Trepe? That I'm fuckin' miserable being here?"

"I just want you to tell me the truth. I need to know that you can handle the pressure of being here, for the mission's sake."

"Yeah it's always about the damn mission with you, isn't it? Like I told you earlier, I'm  _fine_. You know, it's pretty damn convenient for you that you get to push me about  _my_  feelings—or whatever shit it is you want to know—but you get to keep avoiding  _my_  question."

"What? What question?" Quistis asked, goading him into continuing his thought.

"The same damn question I've asked you twice now, that you keep avoiding! You want me to talk? Then grow a pair and tell me why you left me at the hotel, alone, on the fucking floor! After I told you something that I've  _never_  told anyone before. How's that for being fucking  _compassionate_?!"

"I'm sorry, okay? Is that what you wanted to hear? I left because...I didn't know what to say to you. I didn't expect to see you at the bar, I didn't expect to go to the hotel with you. I didn't expect for us to...I didn't expect for  _any_  of that to happen."

"And you think I did? It's not like I stalk that fucking bar, waiting for you to come back. I wasn't expecting you either but at least I'm man enough to face you the next morning."

"Well...I don't know, that's something you're used to, I guess. It's not every day that I wake up in a hotel room with some guy I left the bar with."

"Oh, so whoring myself out is a new trademark of mine? I have to pick up chicks from the bar because they'd be the only ones who wouldn't give two shits about who I was? That's why it must be the norm for me, huh? And I'm just  _some guy_  now? Like we didn't know each other before, like I didn't offer to let you stay in my room because making you walk through the fucking rain back to Garden would've been a dick move. You know what? Fuck you, Quistis," he spat before he turned around and stalked away.

Throughout Seifer's entire tirade, Quistis hands had clenched tighter and tighter, her fingernails leaving painful crescent marks in her palm. She watched Seifer's retreating back, his shoulders hunched and his hands clenched into fists at his side. "Where are you going?" she called out to him.

"Somewhere that isn't here! Thanks to  _you_ , I need a fuckin' drink now!" he shouted back at her over his shoulder.

He disappeared around the corner and she clenched her jaw so tightly that her cheeks ached. Seifer had always been difficult, even when he'd been her student. Now that they were older, he was more vulgar, his emotions locked down behind the even thicker wall he'd erected to keep everyone out.

Oddly enough though, Seifer had always been the only one who was willing to call her out on her bullshit and apparently, he'd just done exactly that. As much as she hated to admit it, he was right. Like a coward, she'd ran away that day, afraid of exposing her vulnerable side to anyone, let alone to him. Surprisingly,  _he'd_  been the first one to open up and share a piece of himself with her. She hadn't even thought to consider how difficult that must have been for him and then the next day, she'd disappeared, like everyone else in his life. As if it had meant nothing to her that he'd put himself out there.

She shook her head, exhausted from their confrontation, and slowly walked back into her room. Collapsing into bed and pulling the covers over her head, she closed her eyes and her medication finally kicked in. She drifted off to sleep, her heart heavy in her chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so very much to all of my readers as well as those who have subscribed and left kudos. This is by far my most popular story here on AO3 and it's because of you guys that I continue to do what I enjoy so very much. I hope you guys liked this chapter and I always love to hear your thoughts!
> 
> Lastly, thanks to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading.


	9. Convolution

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quistis and Seifer venture into the city to investigate leads. Plot twists everywhere!

* * *

_**Convolution:** an intricate, involved matter or condition._

* * *

Quistis absentmindedly stirred her coffee, causing the liquid to form a mini whirlpool in the center of the mug. The warmth of the desert sun permeated the empty board room, making the already stale air extremely stuffy, and she leaned her elbows on the windowsill as she gazed out upon the city. She lifted her mug and took a sip as she gazed out over the rim through the wide windows that lined the room. From the Presidential Palace she was able to see the entirety of Esthar's cityscape and she had to admit that she could see why many of the people she knew weren't fond of it.

Esthar was the very epitome of a metropolis. Its streets wound around tall skyscrapers and the majority of the architecture was comprised of blue-toned, reflective glass. From high up, it looked like a monochrome maze with no exit that was nearly triple the size of Deling City. Unless one was a fan of sprawling urban cities that were packed to the brim with people, Esthar was not the place for them.

Good thing Quistis didn't have a preference.

As always, she was the first to arrive. A quick glance at the screen of her phone showed that it was 5:40 A. a slight shake of her head at her predictable behavior, she turned away from the window and pulled one of the plush, leather chairs out from under the table. Sinking into it with a content sigh—the board room had much more comfortable chairs than Balamb Garden's meeting room—she set her mug down on the lacquered wooden surface.

After a few minutes had passed, her impatience got the best of her and she started drumming her fingers on the table. The thin sound of her nails rapping on the hollow surface filled the room and she kept at it for the next little bit until it threatened to drive her crazy. She switched from making obnoxious noises to wrapping her fingers around the porcelain mug, letting the coffee warm her palms. She took another sip and realized that it was pretty much empty, so she rose and ambled over to the coffee machine, topping her mug off.

It was then that the door burst open and Laguna Loire nearly fell into the board room, catching himself on the door knob. Quistis watched him regain his balance with an amused smile on her face as she ripped open a few sugar packets and dumped their contents into her coffee.

Kiros and Ward shuffled in after him a few seconds later, with Kiros rolling his eyes at his friend's clumsiness. When the President glanced over and spotted Quistis, he chuckled unabashedly and sent a half-hearted wave her way.

"Good morning President Loire," Quistis greeted politely as she wandered back over to her chair.

Laguna's face fell at her professional tone and he mockingly placed his hand over his heart as he said, "Quistis! How many times have I asked you to call me Laguna?"

Under her breath, Quistis sighed lightly and she smiled at his jovial attitude. Squall and his father could not be more opposite. "I'm sorry, Laguna. Force of habit."

"Yeah, yeah, that's what you all say," he replied as he waved his hands at her in dismissal before continuing. "Except for Selphie. She always calls me Laguna! Where is she anyway?"

At the mention of her bubbly friend, Quistis tensed as she waited for the flash of sadness to shoot through her. To her surprise, all that she felt was a slight ache—the kind that popped up when you missed someone because you hadn't seen them in so long, but that wasn't accompanied by crippling emotional pain.

"She and Irvine returned to Trabia to help with repairs," she explained, her eyebrows lowered and her eyes focused on the painting behind Laguna's face.

"Oh, that's too bad! I love chatting with her. Well we're a little early. I guess we'll just wait for Squall and Rinoa to get here and then we can get started!" Laguna said as he rubbed his hands together and plopped down into the chair at the head of the table.

Kiros and Ward took their seats on opposite sides of Laguna, and Quistis leaned forward to say, "What about Seifer? He needs to be here for the mission briefing, correct?"

At the mention of Seifer, Laguna's easy smile morphed into a more grim expression and he replied, "Ah yes, Mr. Almasy. I guess we should probably wait for him, too."

For some reason, even though she understood Laguna's trepidation, his disregard for Seifer's presence irked Quistis and she leaned back into the chair, crossing her arms tightly over her chest.

A few minutes later, the door opened again, albeit less violently than before. Squall strode in, in his usual 'civilian' clothing—though most could probably recognize him in his trademark fur-collared leather jacket by now—and came around the table, sinking down into the seat at the opposite end of the table from his father.

Quistis found it amusing how they looked so alike in some ways: their hair color, the usually disheveled appearance of their longer-than-most hair length, their eyes, their builds. Yet, in other ways, they were so different.

Laguna was nearly always the center of attention, the pivotal presence in a room. A cheerful, welcoming smile was always on his face. Many always felt like they could pour out their heart and soul to him and he'd be the best listener anyone could have asked for. His body language was always open and inviting and whether you knew him personally or not, he was always willing to envelope you in a hug.

Whereas in Squall's case...the apple did indeed fall far from the tree. Squall had always been closed off, slow to divest personal information, which included the way he might feel about a person or a situation. Even to those in his close inner circle, the maximum limit of his words per sentence was perhaps ten. His expression was permanently etched into a deep frown, though that had lessened somewhat since Rinoa had entered his life. He was all business, all the time.

One could argue that it was their life experiences that made them different, but they were both exposed to battle and hardships. They'd simply dealt with them in completely opposite ways.

Once Squall was settled in his seat, Quistis turned to him. "Where's Rinoa?"

"I tried to wake her up this morning. She just rolled over and mumbled something about it being too early. I assume she fell back asleep after I left the room," he explained.

She laughed once, short and to the point, and replied, "That sounds like her."

"She sleeps even more now that she's pregnant. I would've never thought that would be possible but...here we are," he said wryly. Again, one had to know Squall well in order to tell that he was joking. An outsider might've assumed that he was irritated that his fiance slept so much.

"Well, we're just waiting on Mr. Almasy now," Laguna commented.

Squall narrowed his eyes at Laguna's statement and his father's lack of attempt at disguising his irritation. Laguna was like an open book and hiding his emotions was a foreign concept to the older man.

Finally, nearly thirty minutes past 0600, Seifer strolled into the room, Hyperion strapped to his waist. Nonchalantly, he meandered around the table and sank down into the only available chair: the one beside Quistis. He propped his gunblade against the armrest and relaxed into the back of the chair, interlacing his fingers and propping them up behind his head as he leaned back. When a few minutes had passed and no one had spoken, he quirked an eyebrow around the room and said, "What, you guys still haven't started yet?"

"We were waiting for you," Quistis hissed under her breath.

"Aw, you guys didn't have to do that! I'm flattered you think I'm so important," Seifer quipped.

Squall let out an almost imperceptible sigh before looking over at Kiros. "Whatever, let's get to it. Kiros, if you would?"

The darker-skinned male pulled out a stack of papers from the briefcase he'd set on the floor and passed them out to Quistis, Seifer and Squall. The top sheet was labeled 'Classified' and Quistis quickly skimmed through the pages that were held together with a large binder clip. Most of it was identical to the information packet Headmaster Cid had provided before they'd left Garden, but there were a few sheets that didn't look familiar.

After the packets had been disbursed, Kiros stood and unclipped his stack, lifting the first sheet up to show the group. A copy of the death threat that Quistis and Seifer had analyzed on the Ragnarok was before them. "As you've all been informed before your arrival, we received this death threat, which we believe was aimed at President Laguna, less than forty-eight hours ago."

"It arrived in an unmarked envelope, dropped off at the front security desk with the rest of the daily mail. I'm sure you've had time to go over the security footage that we've provided for you and we'd like to hear your thoughts on possible suspects," Kiros finished before he sat back down.

At that, Squall turned to Quistis and said, "SeeD Trepe, you are taking point on this operation. Care to inform us of yours and Agent Almasy's findings in the material?"

Quistis stood and brushed the back of her skirt down before placing her fingertips on the table's surface. "While we were en route to Esthar, we studied the security footage and noticed one individual in particular who had made multiple appearances, over a period of a few days. This individual—"

Folded pieces of paper landed on the table in front of Quistis and when she turned and glared at Seifer for interrupting her, he shrugged indifferently. She picked them up and unfolded them, seeing that he'd printed out still images of the man in the hat that they'd picked out from the footage. Clearing her throat before holding up the images, she continued, "This individual appears to be male, likely between the ages of twenty and forty, which we've surmised from his posture and his movements. Unfortunately, all of the times he's appeared in the footage, his face has been hidden with a cap and he always has the collar of his jacket pulled up, making it difficult to discern his appearance."

Once she'd finished speaking, she handed the photo over to Ward who inspected it closely before passing it on to Laguna. As the picture was making its way around the room, she then held up the copy of the phone log that they'd received.

"Agent Almasy and I went through the phone log and have highlighted numbers that caught our attention, due to showing up multiple times. We'd like you all to please go through the list of common numbers and eliminate those that you recognize, so that we don't waste time chasing empty leads," she explained before pushing the highlighted list over to Kiros.

"Hey Pres, you got a girlfriend?" Seifer piped up.

Laguna's eyes shot up from the photo he'd been studying to meet Seifer's, his eyebrows raised in surprise. "I'm sorry?"

Squall sighed and placed his head in his hands. Seifer grinned and moved his hands from behind his head to point at the phone list. "I'm just saying. If you have a lady friend you talk to a lot, it'd let us cross off at least one of those numbers."

Laguna stared at Seifer, his mouth hanging open in disbelief. "No, Agent Almasy. I do  _not_  have a girlfriend."

"Alright, alright. I gotta admit that it's kinda disappointing to hear that…" he trailed off.

Quistis sighed in exasperation and said, "Anyway! Once you've gone through the list, please inform us which numbers are  _not_  familiar to you and we'll go investigate those individuals. Often times, you'll get radical members of resistance factions or anti-government groups who like to call and think they're making a difference somehow. It doesn't hurt to cross those people off of our list."

Laguna, Kiros, and Ward nodded in agreement before Kiros spoke. "Is there anything else  _we_  can do to help your investigation?"

The blue mage nodded. "If there are any public appearances you're planning on making in the next little while President Loire, we'd like to know. We know that we can't stop you from doing your job but if you absolutely have to show yourself in public, we can try to use that to our advantage. Obviously this man has paid a visit to the Palace enough times to show that he wouldn't hesitate to come if you put yourself out there."

"Ah." Laguna held his finger up as he began to speak. "I'll be making a speech tonight in the Presidential Plaza. It's the anniversary of our liberation from Adel's rule—kind of a big event here in Esthar."

Squall glared at his father from across the table. In a low voice, he said, "That would've been nice to know  _before_  we got here. If it's tonight, we only have maybe twelve hours to prepare and set up. That's not a lot of time."

Laguna shrugged and replied, "Sorry, I forgot. I mean, everyone here in Esthar knows. Didn't think to tell you guys."

Quistis and Squall glanced at each other before Quistis turned to Laguna. "Where is the Presidential Plaza?"

"It's just the plaza in front of the Palace's front doors," Laguna explained.

"Kiros, what is the setup going to look like? Can you draw us a diagram?" Quistis asked.

Kiros nodded before standing and wandering over to the whiteboard behind Squall. As he drew images in black marker, Quistis turned back to Laguna and questioned, "How long is the event? Is it just a speech or is there more afterwards? What does the entire event involve?"

"First I make a speech about how we've come so far since Adel's reign, followed by a bunch of stuff about where we're going in the future. I think that takes about...oh I don't know, thirty or forty minutes?" the President explained as he waved his hands in the air.

Kiros faced the group again and picked up where Laguna had left off. "After the speech, we clear the crowd from the plaza and a parade travels through the city, starting from the Palace and circling around the outer edge before returning."

"Then?" Quistis prompted.

"The parade takes about an hour and once it returns to the Palace, we finish the night with fireworks," Kiros explained.

"When does the party begin?" Seifer asked.

Kiros turned to Seifer, clearly displeased at having to explain anything to the blond gunbladist. "The speech is scheduled to begin promptly at 7:00 P.M. The fireworks usually go up around 8:30 P.M."

"And you people gather in the plaza for the fireworks?" Seifer continued on to ask.

Kiros sighed and said, "Many stay in the plaza, yes. Others return to their homes and watch from their balconies or get together at restaurants, things like that."

Quistis took her seat again and Seifer looked at her, holding her gaze. Though they'd left off on bad terms last night, right now they needed to focus on the mission and she was impressed that he was acting so professional. Well, as professional as  _Seifer_  could.

"I wouldn't be surprised if this guy does something rash during the parade, or even during the speech. It's a good time for terrorists to make their move," Seifer commented.

"You mean like you?" Squall prodded.

Seifer narrowed his eyes at the Commander and muttered, "Watch it, Puberty Boy."

"Ahem, let's stay on topic," Quistis instructed before looking at the diagram Kiros had drawn on the board. "According to Kiros' depiction, we'll need to find points of vulnerability and make sure that they stay adequately covered. President Loire, how many members of your personal guard are we allowed to use for support?"

At that, Laguna looked at Ward, who made a few gestures with his hands. Quistis lowered her eyebrows and looked over at Seifer, who shrugged. When Quistis glanced back at Laguna she stuttered, "I-I'm sorry President Loire, I don't…"

Kiros piped up then and said, "Oh, Ward is in charge of security at the Palace. He says you're welcome to borrow as many guards as you need."

Quistis folded her hands in her lap before saying, "I...see. Thank you for uh, translating. If you could give our team a few minutes to deliberate over the diagram, we'll get back to you on the exact number of guards. For now, we plan on going out into the city and following a few leads as well as visualizing where things will be per the diagram you've given us. It helps to see things in person and form a plan from there."

Laguna rose from his chair, prompting Kiros and Ward to follow his lead. The older man looked down at Quistis and smiled. "Thank you for being here, you guys. It really means a lot that you're helping us out. Let us know if you need anything else, okay? We gotta run now. I actually still haven't written said speech so uh...I'll be in my office if you guys need me!"

The three men trailed out of the room, shutting the door behind them. A few seconds of silence passed before Quistis turned to Squall and asked, "So when are you and Rinoa leaving?"

Squall pushed his chair back and stood, crossing his arms over his chest. "We were planning on staying for a little while because Rinoa wanted to spend time with Laguna. Since the speech is tonight I guess we'll probably end up sticking around to listen. Making an appearance would probably send Laguna into fits of inexplicable excitement."

Seifer scoffed at the image and Quistis chuckled under her breath before commenting, "That  _is_  something I could see happening."

"Yeah, whatever. Let me know if you guys need any help with the prep for tonight. I'm going to go try and wake Rinoa up again," Squall replied before traipsing over to the door and walking out of the room.

"Well, shall we?" Quistis said, rising from her chair.

"You gonna take a picture of that diagram so we can head outside?" Seifer asked, jerking his thumb at the whiteboard.

"Oh right," she mumbled as she reached into her pocket and pulled out her phone. After snapping a shot of the board, she gathered all of the materials on the table and made her way to the door.

To her surprise, Seifer rushed ahead of her and held the door open. When she quirked an eyebrow at his uncharacteristically chivalrous behavior, he rebutted, "What, could you have opened the door with all that shit in your hands?"

"Uh no, I couldn't have. Thank you," she muttered before walking through the doorway and heading down the hall towards their rooms.

He trailed after her and when they reached the sitting area, he plopped down onto one of the couches, draping his arm over the back. "I'll wait for you here."

Quistis rolled her eyes at him and continued down the hall. Once she'd dropped off the material and grabbed Save the Queen from the table, she left the room and returned to where she'd left Seifer. When he saw her coming, he stood and they ambled down the hall, towards the exit.

They traveled in silence—the only sound in the rounded hallway was their footsteps against the plush carpet. Before they started to descend the stairs into the lobby, Quistis prompted, "About last night…"

Seifer shook his head in a single, sharp motion. "Don't wanna talk about it."

She turned away, pressing her mouth into a thin line before nodding. "Alright. We should be focusing on the mission anyway."

"Yep."

Quistis glanced over at him as they walked out the sliding glass doors and into the plaza.  _Okay then…_

Once they were standing in the middle of the circular area, Seifer tilted his head back and narrowed his eyes as he stared up at the top of the Palace. Quistis pulled her phone out of her pocket, brought up the diagram that Kiros had drawn, and held the picture out in front of them.

"So the stage is going to go...there," she said, pointing at the doors they'd just walked out of.

"Yeah, I'm willing to bet that they'll close down traffic in and out of the place in a few hours," Seifer predicted.

"Probably. Where we're standing is more than likely where the majority of the crowd is going to be," she continued.

Seifer looked up again and pointed this time. Quistis followed his finger up to the spot on the roof, just above the entrance. "That'd be a good place for sniper coverage."

"We don't have Irvine on this mission," Quistis reminded him.

"Yeah, I know that. I'm sure Pres has got someone with sharpshootin' skills around here somewhere."

She hummed before turning to look at the plaza's opening. "We should probably post a few guards there too, to keep an eye out for anyone matching the suspect's description."

Seifer nodded and crossed his arms over his chest. "Puberty Boy said you're taking point, so where are you gonna hole up?"

Quistis' crystal blue eyes flitted around the perimeter until landing on the doors again. "I'll stand on the stage with President Loire, so I have a vantage point over the crowd. People are bound to recognize you and I'm not sure that the Estharians would feel reassured knowing  _you_  were protecting their president."

"Fuckin' ridiculous. I know I screwed them over all those years ago but I'm  _helping_  this time. It's bullshit but whatever. Where you puttin' me then?"

Quistis pointed over to the opening and said, "There. I want you wandering through the crowd, keeping an eye out for the guy. If he tries anything, I want you near the entrance in case you need to pursue on foot."

"Whatever you want, Instructor."

She sighed and with less vehemence than usual said, "Seifer..."

"Yeah, yeah. Well it's only 0800 right now. What do you want me doing until tonight?" he asked.

"I'm going to investigate some of these phone numbers. Why don't you come along?" she suggested.

"Oh, you want to spend time with me now?" he quipped.

"No. It's so we can trade off on the good-cop, bad-cop routine. You are familiar with that technique, aren't you?" Quistis asked in a dry voice.

"I was actually listening to your lecture that day, so yeah, I am. Wait, am I the good cop or the bad cop?" he asked as they made their way out of the plaza and on to the cobalt streets of Esthar.

She sighed again before impatiently saying, "Honestly, does it matter?"

* * *

 Over the next few hours, they stopped people on the streets and showed them the image of the man from the security footage. It was a stretch considering not much of the man's face was visible, but if someone knew him, they were likely to pick up on certain visual cues that they might have missed.

Unfortunately, not a single person was able to identify the man, and by the time the duo reached the opposite end of the city, they were annoyed and exhausted. Seifer suggested grabbing a bite to eat while they recuperated and Quistis had readily agreed. After making their way into the shopping district of the city, they wandered up to a steakhouse named "The Queen's House of Cards".

"Is that supposed to be a play on the card group?" Seifer asked.

She shrugged and they strode inside, pausing in front of the seating podium. The hostess took them out onto the outdoor patio and they sat down at a tall table along the patio's fence. Once they'd ordered their drinks—"Really Seifer? Whisky for  _lunch_?"—Quistis pulled her phone out of her pocket again and pulled up the directory that Kiros had given her access to. It allowed her to search all residents of Esthar by name, address, phone number, or identification number.

After pulling out the copy of the condensed phone log, which only contained the numbers they'd highlighted earlier, she inputted the numbers into the database and jotted down the names and addresses of those individuals. Their food arrived a few minutes later and she set aside the list for afterwards.

"So, who'd you find?" Seifer asked, pointing to the stack next to Quistis' elbow with his steak knife.

"Oh uh...a few people so far. A man named Marcus and a lady named Winnifred," she mumbled before taking a bite out of her cheeseburger.

"Winnifred? Who the fuck names their kid Winnifred?"

"Estharians? I don't know," she replied.

"Huh, alright. We checkin' these people out?"

"Let's just find these two and then we'll head back. I want to make sure everyone gets into position before the speech begins," Quistis explains.

"Whatever you say, boss lady," Seifer remarked before leaning back in his chair and sticking his hand into the air. "Hey! Waitress! We're done here!"

"Seifer! That's incredibly rude!" Quistis hissed.

"Well she ain't coming back. Takin' her sweet fuckin' time and we're in a rush, right?" he retorted.

Quistis rubbed her temple with her fingers and shook her head at his behavior.  _I swear I can't take him into public._

The waitress finally ambled over to their table, her face scrunched up in annoyance at being summoned. Seifer placed a few bills in her hand, told her to keep the change and rose from his chair, prompting Quistis to hurry with his hand.

She rolled her eyes at him and grabbed her things from the table, trailing after him back outside. Once they were on the street again, Seifer shielded his eyes from the blazing sun and looked in both directions before saying, "Which way?"

Quistis pulled up the address for 'Winnifred Sanderson' and pointed to the left, "She lives just outside of the shopping district. Head that direction."

They trekked past multiple shops until the commercial buildings began to turn into apartments, eventually making their way down a side street labeled 'Gesper Lane'. Modern houses comprised of stacked cubes in varying shades of cobalt and lavender lined the street, and Quistis craned her neck back to inspect the architectural style.

"Estharians are weird," Seifer commented.

Quistis hummed a noncommittal sound and stopped in front of a house labeled '1802' before reaching out and tugging on Seifer's coat. "Stop. It's this one."

Ms. Sanderson turned out to be a woman in her mid-fifties with unruly red hair and a croaky voice. When they'd questioned her on whether she recognized the man in the photo, she'd denied having any knowledge of him. Quistis pressed her on why she'd called the Presidential Palace nearly four times a day and Ms. Sanderson had said, "My son works in the kitchens. What, I can't call my own son without the government gettin' suspicious?! I swear, our president is a real kook. When I was young…"

They'd left her talking to herself on her front porch.

Seifer flagged a taxi down and they made their way to Marcus Bywater's house, the second suspicious person who also called the Palace frequently. His residence was near the Presidential Palace, in some high-rise condo building that had a perfect view of the plaza.

"Coincidence, much?" Seifer observed, which Quistis was inclined to agree.

Fifteen minutes later, the cab dropped them off on the side of the street in front of the condo entrance.

"You got this one right, Trepe?" Seifer said as he brushed past her and into the main lobby.

With an irritated exhale, she pulled a few bills out of her wallet and paid the driver, then trailed after Seifer into the building. She found him standing by a directory, his finger tracing along the glass as he read the names on the board.

"Bywater, right?" he asked.

"Yeah. Marcus Bywater," she confirmed.

"He's up on the twentieth floor. I don't think we can get up there without a key though."

"Hmm, we'll just have to get resourceful. Do they have a call box?" she asked while her eyes scanned the lobby.

"Nope. You scan the key to get up to the floor, then you knock on the door. Call boxes are for condos in the slums."

"Is there even such a thing as a condominium in the  _slums_?"

"In Esthar? Probably not. These guys seem loaded," he mumbled.

Just then, a brunette woman walked into the lobby, her arms lined with shopping bags. She sidled up to the elevator and tried to press the 'up' button but couldn't reach with her arms full. Seifer darted over to her and pressed the button, his mouth moving quickly as he spoke to her. Quistis narrowed her eyes at him and once the elevator dinged to announce its arrival, with his hand at his side, he motioned for Quistis to follow.

Seifer and the brunette turned to face the front and Quistis stood in front of them, not acknowledging Seifer or even looking at him. In fact, it was like she didn't even know him.

"So...are you from here?" the woman asked Seifer in a vaguely disguised innocent tone.

In a smoother, richer voice than Quistis was used to hearing out of Seifer's mouth, he replied, "No, I'm visiting family. My sister lives in this building."

"Oh really? On what floor?" the woman asked next.

"The twentieth?"

"You're kidding! I live on that floor too!" she exclaimed. Quistis rolled her eyes at the girl's exuberance.

"Well how 'bout that?" Seifer replied.

"Do you uh, do you come and visit often?" the woman pried, her voice falling into a low and sultry tone.

"I don't but uh, I think I might have to from now on," he responded.

The elevator announced its arrival on the twentieth floor and Quistis stepped out, letting Seifer and the woman pass by first. The woman was so enraptured by Seifer's "charm" that she didn't even notice Quistis as she passed by.

They made their way down the hall, with Quistis a ways behind them and when they paused in front of what she assumed was the woman's apartment, she pressed herself against the wall and pretended to be playing on her phone. She heard the woman giggle—rather obnoxiously too—and Seifer said something in a low voice, before she heard the sound of a closing door.

She glanced up and Seifer tilted his head at her, beckoning for her to follow before continuing on down the hall. When she caught up to him, she glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and as nonchalantly as possible, asked, "What was that all about?"

"Nothin'. Just tryin' to be smooth to get us a ride up here without her asking questions," Seifer explained.

"Hmm."

"Why Trepe? You jealous or something?" he smirked down at her.

Quistis scoffed as they came to a stop in front of a door with the 'Bywater' nameplate. "Why would I be jealous? Feel free to date whoever you want."

"Who said I wanted to date her?" he goaded with his arms crossed.

"Well why  _else_  would you be flirting?" she stated while she knocked on the door.

"Don't gotta date someone to sleep with them," he commented.

"Is that all men think about? Sex?"

"Yes."

She made a disgusted sound and knocked again. When a few more seconds had passed with no answer, Seifer said, "Doesn't look like he's home. Want me to pick the lock?"

Quistis glanced up and down the hall, checking that the coast was clear before nodding curtly. "Yes. I want to make sure this guy is clean. But hurry, it's almost four and I want to get back and start prepping for the speech."

"You got it," he agreed as he kneeled down and pulled a kit out of his coat pocket.

Seifer worked at the lock, moving the pick left and right before jiggling the doorknob a couple of times. Quistis tapped her foot impatiently against the carpeted floor, her hands on her hips. When a minute or two had passed and he still hadn't gotten it, she asked, "You  _are_  capable of doing this, right?"

"Would ya shut up, Trepe? I'm concentrating," he muttered under his breath.

Quistis let out a sharp exhale and crossed her arms over her chest. "Just hurry!" she whispered.

"I am!" he retorted, placing the pick in between his teeth before pulling something else out of the kit.

The elevator dinged then and Quistis' head whipped around to the end of the hall. "Get up!" she hissed at Seifer.

He shot to his feet and leaned against the wall next to the doorframe, his leg crossed lazily over the opposite ankle.

A man with brown hair traipsed down the hall towards them, slowing when he lifted his head and spotted them by the door. "You guys having trouble?" he asked, his voice low.

"Oh no, we don't live here. We're visiting a friend and he just told us that he isn't home yet so we're waiting for him to get here," Quistis lied with a cheerful smile pasted onto her face.

"Are you talkin' about Bywater?" the guy asked, pointing to the door the duo was standing by.

"Yes! Marcus! Do you know him?" Quistis pushed.

"I live two units down so I've talked to him from time to time. He uh, he moved out like a month ago…" he trailed off.

"Shit, you're kidding! He said he'd be here. What a dick!" Seifer exclaimed.

The brunet man raised an eyebrow at Seifer and shuffled away, back towards the elevator. "Ah, speaking of friends, I forgot a friend of mine wanted me to drop something off to her apartment before the parade. I should do that while I still got time. But yeah, as far as Marcus goes, I wouldn't wait around. Considering he moved, you'll be waiting for awhile."

"Huh. Thanks buddy," Seifer called out and the guy waved as the elevator doors closed, hiding him from view.

"Moved? When I checked the directory this morning, it said he still lived here," Quistis whispered.

"I dunno, maybe the directory is old," he suggested.

Quistis looked the other way and stared intently down the hall before saying, "Hold on. Let me get the names off of the units that are two doors down."

"What for?"

"So we can check that guy out as well. I'm not sure I believe him," she called out over her shoulder as she jogged away.

"Whatever you wanna do. Let's head back so you can prep for the shit that's goin' down tonight. You can ask Dreadlock Boy about how often they update the directory later," Seifer suggested when Quistis returned to his side and together, they trekked down the hall to the elevator.

"Kiros, Seifer. His name is Kiros," she reprimanded as she pressed the down button.

"Yeah, yeah."

* * *

Roughly two and a half hours later, Quistis was positioned behind the stage and in front of the sliding glass doors to the Presidential Palace. The speech was scheduled to start in a half hour and she'd just sent guards out to the plaza's entrance, stationed more along the roof of the Palace, and placed a few around the perimeter of the plaza.

She lifted her radio and spoke into the static. "Knight, do you copy?"

"Loud and clear, Ice Queen," Seifer's voice came back.

A sigh left her at the ridiculous codename he'd chosen for her. "Are you in position?"

"Yep."

"Alright. It's t-minus thirty minutes before Head Honcho is scheduled to hit the stage. Make sure you remain in position throughout the speech," she instructed.

"Got it."

"Also, these codenames are the worst," she mumbled.

A chuckle came through the radio and Seifer joked, "Whatever, they're the best. It's not like you've never heard Ice Queen back at home base."

"That doesn't mean I  _like_  it," she replied before turning to face the stairs. Squall and Rinoa were coming down to the lobby with Laguna, Kiros and Ward right behind them.

Rinoa waved to Quistis who lifted her hand in response while she said, "Okay, radio silence for now. I'll check in with you again when we hit the stage."

"Roger that, Ice Queen," Seifer returned.

Quistis rolled her eyes and tucked the walkie talkie into her pocket as the group reached her. Laguna was waving his hands in front of his face and making boat noises with his lips while Kiros read cues to him from flash cards in his hand. Ward was gesturing to the few remaining guards in the lobby and Squall was shaking his head at Laguna's antics.

"I swear. I really don't understand how such a moron became president of an advanced country," the Commander commented.

Rinoa punched him in the arm and reprimanded, "Squall, he's your father! Be nice!"

"Whatever, it's the truth. I get to say that  _because_  he's my father, Rin."

Quistis shook her head slowly with a smile on her face and asked, "Are you guys going to be on the stage too?"

"Yeah. Apparently it's to show 'moral support' to the public. You know, considering we're family," Squall replied, deadpan.

"Cheer up, Squall. At least you won't have to speak," Quistis encouraged.

"Okay Mr. President. Fifteen minutes!" a guard called out.

Quistis turned and glanced out the doors before facing Squall and Rinoa again. "I'm going to head out there and get into position now. I'll see you guys out there."

The couple nodded and Quistis walked out into the plaza, the sound of cheering Estharians echoing between the raised sides of the Palace walls. She quickly climbed up the side stairs leading up to the stage and walked across the platform, coming to a stop just past the Estharian flag they'd placed in a stand behind the podium.

Her eyes scanned the massive throng of people that filled the area, double-checking that all of the guards were in position. To confirm, she raised the radio to her mouth again and asked, "This is Ice Queen. All guards in position?"

"Affirmative."

"Affirmative, Ice Queen."

"You got it, Ice Queen."

She rolled her eyes at Seifer's response and lowered the radio, looking over at the stairs for Squall and Rinoa, who were supposed to appear before Laguna. A quick check of her wristwatch showed they had five minutes left until they hit the stage. Right when she lowered her wrist, the Estharian anthem began to play over the loudspeakers and the crowd cheered as confetti rained down from the roof.

Quistis' radio sparked to life and she lifted it as a guard said, "Commander and Angel Wing coming your way, Ice Queen. Head Honcho is right behind them."

"Copy that," she replied.

Just a few minutes later, Squall and Rinoa came to the stage, followed closely by Laguna, Kiros and Ward. True to form, Laguna choked as he began giving the speech that Kiros had written for him about the trials of overcoming the oppressive sorceress' rule. Instead of the estimated forty minutes, he kicked off the parade after ten minutes of mostly nonsensical babbling about sorceresses and freedom to the overwhelming cheers and shouts of the Estharian people. Once the crowd had been cleared from the middle of the plaza, the floats were pushed out and the parade was officially underway.

Laguna turned to Quistis and said, "So, meeting back here in an hour for the fireworks, right?"

She nodded and replied, "I'd prefer it if you went back inside for the duration of the parade, President Loire. We'll ensure that everyone is in position and ready for the commencement of the fireworks."

"What would we do without you Quistis? See you in a bit!" the older man exclaimed before waving and leaving the stage with Kiros and Ward in tow.

Quistis remained on the stage with Squall and Rinoa, her shrewd eyes inspecting the plaza. Squall crossed his arms and stared off into the distance, spotting Seifer who was pacing back and forth at the entrance.

"How's working with Almasy going?" he inquired.

"Okay, for the most part. He's surprisingly professional when he needs to be and his usual obnoxious self at other times. I suppose I shouldn't have expected anything different," she replied.

"You expected a different version of Seifer?" he asked, his raised eyebrow causing his scar to pucker oddly. At that, Rinoa giggled.

"Well...no, I guess I didn't," she said with a small laugh.

Squall grunted in response and Quistis motioned to the stairs. "I'm going to go around and check in with the guards. I want to make sure everyone is in position and on their toes for the fireworks. Be back in a bit?"

The Commander nodded and said, "We'll come with you. We've got an hour to kill."

* * *

Seventy minutes later, the crowd had reconvened in the plaza and Quistis and Squall were on the stage again, awaiting Laguna's return. The fireworks were scheduled to start in a few minutes, after Laguna made another small announcement to officially begin the celebration. Though the parade and the fireworks were today, the memorial event would continue on for the rest of the week.

When Rinoa sprinted back out and onto the stage to stand next to Squall, Quistis raised her radio again and prompted, "Last check before the fireworks begin. Everyone good?"

All of the guard teams chimed in with their confirmations except Seifer. Quistis frowned and said, "Knight. Do you copy?"

A beat passed before he replied, "Yeah, sorry. Thought I saw someone. Anyway, I'm in position. We should be good to go."

"Let's get started then," she instructed before motioning to Laguna off-stage.

The President started at her hand signal and rushed onto the stage, jogging over to the podium. "You guys ready for some fireworks?!" he shouted.

The crowd cheered and Quistis nearly rolled her eyes at the man's childlike ardor. Laguna was really just a big kid on the inside and Squall hadn't been far off when he'd questioned how in the world he'd managed to become president of a country like Esthar.

"Alright! Shoot 'em up, boys!" Laguna commanded.

Streaks of red, green and blue shot up into the sky, exploding into a cascade of light. The loud boom followed soon after and the crowd sighed in awe at the spectacle. Quistis craned her neck back so she could watch the show and a few minutes in, her radio crackled to life. Her eyebrows furrowed and she lifted it to her mouth, her gaze trained on the bursts of color high above.

"Ice Queen. What is it?"

"...he...his...way….to you!" Seifer shouted through the speaker.

"What? Knight, repeat. I can't hear you over the sound of the fireworks," she yelled back.

"Way...to you...Shit!" she heard him cry before another bang interrupted him.

Quistis turned and looked into the crowd, searching for Seifer near the mouth of the plaza. She saw him across the way, trying to squeeze in between people as he gestured frantically at her. When she raised her arms to imply that she didn't understand, he kept pointing ahead of him, his eyes wild.

A wave of premonition washed over Quistis then and her instincts kicked into overdrive. She crouched on the stage and scanned the throng ahead of Seifer, keeping her eye out for someone moving through the mass of still bodies. A second too late, her gaze landed a man near the stage who was wearing a leather jacket with the collar upturned. A black cap was low over his face, hiding his eyes from her view.

Her hand shot to Save the Queen on her belt but she swore under her breath when she realized that she couldn't get to the man without hitting civilians who were in the way. Before she could react, the man pulled a pistol out of his jacket and aimed it up at the stage.

Quistis' crystalline eyes widened as the world seemed to slow down and she could see nothing but the splash of color across the man's face as a firework burst above them. When the man cocked the hammer of his pistol back, Quistis turned and dove for Laguna.

"Laguna! Get down!" she shouted just before she tackled him, causing both of them to hit the stage with a resounding thud.

Just as another firework shot into the air and exploded with a deafening bang, the heart-stopping sound of Rinoa's scream filled the air.

"SQUALL! NO!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading.
> 
> A massive thank you to all of my readers, especially those who take the time to leave kudos and comments. Words are not enough to express my gratitude!


	10. Burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the fireworks, the situation escalates, and things between Seifer and Quistis finally ignite.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning!! This chapter has smutty content. The lemon is after the line break. Because of the content in this chapter, I've pushed the rating up to E. If you don't like lemons/sexual content/smut, then do not read past the line break!
> 
> You've been warned. To the rest of you, enjoy the chapter!

* * *

_And I can barely breathe_  
_When you're here loving me_  
_Fire meet gasoline_  
_Burn with me tonight_

**_Sia - Fire Meet Gasoline_ **

* * *

The booming echo of the gunshot caused chaos to break out across the plaza. Frightened screams from those in the crowd shattered the silence and closed in on Quistis in an overwhelming cacophony of sound. But nothing could overshadow the terrified cry that had come from Rinoa only moments before. Now, she cradled Squall's still body in her arms.

Quistis tore her eyes away from the disturbing sight and pushed herself up from the stage. Looking down into Laguna's eyes, she asked, "Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?"

Despite the fact that his face was pale and his eyes were slightly disoriented, Laguna nodded that he was fine and Quistis scrambled to her feet, rushing over to Squall and Rinoa. She stooped and grabbed the radio from where she'd dropped it when she dove for Laguna, and frantically spoke into it, her voice shaking. "Knight! Knight, do you copy?! What is your position?!"

Seifer's voice immediately came through the radio, causing a wave of relief to wash over Quistis. "The entrance! He ran like a fuckin' coward and I'm going after that son of a bitch!"

"Wait! Take backup with you! Do not engage alone, Knight! Do you hear me?! Do  _not_  engage him alone!"

"Fuck that! He takes a shot at the commander and I gotta let him go 'cause there's no one else around? I'm going after him Ice Queen, whether you like it or not!" he responded snidely and the radio fell silent as he cut the call.

"Knight? Knight, respond!" Quistis spat before shoving the radio into her pocket.  _Damn it Seifer! Why can't you_ ever _follow orders?!_

She knelt down beside Rinoa and placed her hand on the sorceress' shoulder. "How is he?"

"I cast Cura already and he's breathing, but he isn't waking up. There's still  _so_  much blood and I...I can't use Curaga because I don't have any...I-I'm too...I can't focus right now, not with his... _blood_  all over me…" Rinoa trailed off as she erupted into loud sobs, her shoulders quivering with each exhale.

"Rinoa. Rinoa, look at me," Quistis prompted. When the sorceress glanced up and met her eyes, she continued. "He'll be okay. Squall is strong—the strongest of us. With your support, he'll pull through. Here, take my Curagas and once they dig the bullet out, just keep casting until the bleeding stops. I have to go after Seifer, so I need you to stay here and watch over Squall and Laguna. Can you do that, Rinoa?"

Rinoa nodded fervently, her gaze immediately dropping to focus on Squall's face again. Quistis touched the sorceress' shoulder gently, closing her eyes as blue light engulfed the two of them. Once the spells had transferred, she stood, her eyes scanning the stage for Kiros and Ward. She found them crouching by the president, trying to lift him to his feet. Rushing over to them, she instructed, "We need to get Laguna back inside and safe. I assume you two are taking care of that?"

Ward nodded and Kiros said, "We already requested a medical team for Squall. They should be here shortly."

Quistis stared out at the panicked crowd before nodding her head again. "Good. Squall was hit in the shoulder somewhere but with all of the blood in the way, it's hard to tell how serious it is. Also, see if you can manage some crowd control in the meantime. I need to go after Seifer," she instructed, before jumping down from the stage.

Quistis turned back to Kiros and said, "When the med team gets here, make sure they take Squall inside as  _soon_  as possible! I can't have them out here right now. The less I need to worry about, the better."

Kiros nodded and Quistis attempted to move forward through the crowd. People were sprinting in all directions due to the pandemonium—some were running away from the stage, others were frantically pushing anyone who got in their way aside, as they tried to find their loved ones. She squeezed in between bodies and apologized for forcing her way through the throng.

After what felt like ages, she managed to break free from the crowd and came to a stop on the street in front of the Palace. With a quick glance in both directions, she realized she couldn't see Seifer anywhere. Lifting the radio, she asked, "Knight, come in. Where are you?"

"Can't talk...right now...Ice...Queen," Seifer replied, his words interrupted by heavy breaths.

"Where are you?! I'm coming to meet you," she explained.

"Over by the Airstation. Might wanna hurry," he insisted.

Due to Esthar's enormous size, running to the Airstation would take far more time than Quistis had. Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted a man in a seafoam green convertible, trying to start up his car. He was obviously panicking, as she could hear him muttering to himself from the other side of the street. He kept dropping his keys and had to bend over, time and time again, to pick them up.

She sprinted over to him and called out, "Excuse me! I need to borrow your vehicle!"

He glanced at her with wild eyes, his hair sticking out in all directions, as if he'd been running his fingers through it constantly. "W-What? Are you kidding me?! Did you see what happening just now? I gotta get outta here! Sorry lady, you're on your own."

" _I'm_  sorry, I think you misunderstood. This is an emergency, and that  _wasn't_  a request. Move over!" Quistis demanded as she swiped the keys out of his hand and shoved him aside.

He fell to the ground, sputtering in disbelief and she hopped over the closed door, right into the driver's seat. After fumbling with the keys for a few seconds, she found the one with the biggest keycap and shoved it into the ignition, engaging the clutch as she turned the key.

Once the engine roared to life, she quickly shifted into first and sped off, in the direction of the Airstation. The wind whipped her bangs around her face, and if the situation hadn't been so dire, Quistis might've taken the time to appreciate the stolen—or rather, borrowed—vehicle.

Minutes later, the illuminated Airstation loomed up ahead and Quistis saw a glint of metal flash through the air as it reflected the spotlights that were shining down on the street. Hyperion was poised in the air above Seifer's head, the blade ready to strike. In front of Seifer, stood the man that had shot Squall.

She slammed on the brakes and the car skidded to a stop, a few feet away from the two men. Shutting off the car and tossing the keys onto the passenger seat, she opened the door and rushed over to where Seifer and the man were dueling.

As Seifer swung, the man threw his hand up into the air and a glowing azure force field surrounded him. The gunblade glanced off and Seifer lost his balance. When the blond stumbled, the suspect took the opportunity to pull out his pistol, aiming straight for Seifer's face.

"No!" Quistis cried out as she caste Haste and when she was slightly less than a foot away from them, she wrapped her fingers around Save the Queen's leather handle.

She pulled the whip off of her belt hook and jerked her arm back, allowing the coiled weapon to unfurl in the air behind her. With a flick of her wrist, the sharpened tip shot forward and looped around the man's wrist, slicing into his skin as she yanked the gun out of his hand. It clattered to the ground and she ran past it, leaving it behind.

The suspect cried out in agonizing pain as he cradled his now useless appendage, glaring at Quistis as she neared. Seifer regained his footing and swiped Hyperion through the air in frustration as the man turned tail and fled once more.

"Like hell am I lettin' you get away from me!" Seifer bellowed, before darting after the other man.

"Seifer, wait!" Quistis shouted after him. When he didn't listen, she groaned and chased after them.

Since Haste was still active, she caught up to Seifer in no time at all and threw her hand out, ready to cast Slow on the retreating man. Seifer glanced over at her and his eyebrows shot up before he reached out and grabbed her arm, yelling, "Don't! He-"

By then, it was too late and the spell had already left Quistis' hand. When it reached the suspect, instead of successfully slowing him down, the vibrant blue shield of Reflect surrounded the man again and the spell quickly rushed back to hit Quistis, catching her off guard.

"Hyne-damn it! I was trying to remind you that he cast Reflect! Stay here!" he spat, before rushing off.

With excruciatingly slow movements, Quistis came to a stop in the middle of the street. It felt like she was trying to move through viscous quicksand. Though she couldn't move normally, she could still follow Seifer's movements and saw that Seifer had caught up to the suspect, tackling him to the ground.

Hyperion slid across the street when the two men hit the reflective cobalt surface. Seifer reared up and punched the suspect repeatedly in the face, before the other man managed to block Seifer's last hit with his forearms. He hooked his leg around Seifer's waist and rolled them over, gaining the advantage. With his other hand, the suspect pulled a blade out of his inner coat pocket and brought it down point-first towards Seifer's face. At the last second, Seifer's hands came up and he braced them underneath the suspect's wrist, trying to push the man's arms away.

After a few tense seconds, Seifer managed to win the power struggle and bucked his left thigh, throwing the man off of him, and causing the blade to fly out of the man's hand and through the air. When the suspect hit the ground again, he rolled and tried to stand, but Seifer wrapped his fingers around the man's ankle and tugged, causing the man's chin to smack against the street as he fell back down.

The man twisted around and kicked at Seifer's face, his boot connecting with the gunbladist's chin with a sickening crack. Seifer let out a "Fuck me!" as the man scrambled to his feet. His eyes darted around and when he realized his gun was closer than the knife he'd just dropped, he sprinted for it, jumping into the air to gain momentum and sliding along the road when he neared it.

His fingers wrapped around the handle of the pistol and Quistis' tried to warn Seifer, only to have her mouth open centimeter by centimeter due to Slow still being active. Frustrated, she slowly reached up into the air and cast Esuna, feeling the sluggish pall over her body fade as the circular blue rings traveled from her head to her feet. Once the spell finished, she leapt towards the man and snapped her wrist out to the side and then forward. The momentum of her swing caused Save the Queen to curl around the man's neck, the barbed tip of her weapon stabbing into the thin flesh protecting his jugular, and he froze.

"Drop the gun and get on your feet!" she commanded.

The man raised his hands into the air, the pistol falling onto the street as he pushed off of his knees, rising to his feet at a languid pace. Once he'd backed away from Seifer, the blond rolled over and shoved himself up off of the ground. With a sneer on his face, he stalked over to where Hyperion had landed, snatched it up, and stomped back over to the suspect.

"Alright, asshole. Let's see who the fuck we're dealing with, huh?" he spat, before yanking the cap off of the guy's head.

After a brief moment of silence, Seifer scoffed and said to Quistis, "You have to be fucking kidding me. It's the dickwad from the condos. The one who told us Marcus moved?" He turned back to the man and questioned, "The hell are  _you_ doin' trying to shoot the President?"

When the man didn't respond, Seifer glanced down at Save the Queen, before turning to Quistis. "Y'know, he can't exactly talk while your whip is wrapped around his neck," he stated.

Quistis rolled her eyes before pulling back on the leather coil, allowing Save the Queen to unwind. When it fell to the ground, she jerked her wrist and the entire length of the weapon shot up into the air and back into her hand. After looping it together and placing it around her belt hook, she strode over to stand beside Seifer and scrutinize the suspect.

"We need to question him. Let's head back to the Presidential Palace," Quistis instructed as she moved behind the man to secure his hands.

"Got it, Ice Queen," Seifer confirmed.

When Quistis reached for the suspect's arms, the man reared back and headbutted her in the forehead, causing white stars to pop up all over her vision. She staggered back and inhaled sharply at the unexpected pain, as Seifer reached forward to grab the man's midsection. The suspect ducked and swept his leg out, knocking Seifer to the ground.

The man about-faced to dart around Quistis but he obviously hadn't expected her to recover as quickly as she had. Not a second after he'd brushed past her, she loosed Save the Queen and the whip flew through the air, winding around the man's ankle. She yanked it back and he crashed to the ground again, twisting around to reach down and pull the leather coil off of him.

She hurried over to where he'd fallen, but the suspect managed to untangle himself from Save the Queen's hold and got to his feet. Quistis caught up to him just as he moved to break into a run and grabbed his shoulder, whirling him around.

The suspect used his newfound momentum to leap towards her. He reached into his jacket again and a flash of metal caught her eye. With a sharp inhalation of air, she reflexively jumped away and grabbed the man's wrist as it flew in her direction, twisting it up and to the side to disarm him. He threw the blade he'd been holding into the air, only to grab it with his other hand and slice it across Quistis' abdomen.

She cried out, the blade leaving a searing trail across her stomach, and she fell to her knees. While she was incapacitated, the suspect sped past her. Pressing her hand into her side, she groaned at the pain as Seifer sprinted over, skidding to a stop and kneeling down in front of her.

"Hyne-damn it, he's getting away. Holy shit! You're bleeding all over the place!" he shouted.

"I'll be fine! Go after him!" she directed. When Seifer still didn't move, his eyes fixated on the blood that was spreading rapidly across her clothing, she pointed at the suspect's retreating figure and yelled, "GO!"

"Tch, damn it!" he exclaimed, before springing to his feet and racing off after the suspect.

Quistis pulled her hand away from her stomach, feeling light-headed once she saw her fingers coated in her blood. With heavy breaths, she reached down to cast Curaga, only to remember that she'd given them all to Rinoa before she left the Plaza. She knew Seifer would have some, but he'd just ran off, per her command.

 _Great plan, Quistis. Such a_ fantastic  _leader you are…_

With shaky legs, she stood and began making her way back towards the car so that she could drive to the Palace, where she knew she could get medical attention. She'd only made it about four steps when a sharp spike of pain shot through her midsection, radiating from the stab wound outwards, and she collapsed to her knees once more.

She tried to take small breaths so as to limit her movements, but it was difficult when all she wanted to do was inhale deeply to calm her racing heart. Heavy footsteps reverberated on the semi-hollow streets and Quistis glanced up at the sound.

Seifer was rushing back towards her, the tattered hemline of his grey trenchcoat flapping behind him. When he reached her, he knelt and placed her arm around his neck and lifted her to her feet.

"S-Seifer? What are you doing?! I asked you to-"

He interrupted and said, "Yeah, I know what you asked. I barely made it around the corner before I decided it was stupid as fuck and turned around. I'm not gonna leave you here to bleed out."

"But you...you need to catch...the suspect! He-"

Seifer interrupted her again and yelled, "I know, Trepe! Damn it, you stayin' alive is more important! You don't have any Curagas, do you?"

"No, I...Rinoa has them to keep Squall alive..."

"Figures. All I've got is Cura, so it'll stop the bleeding for now. We'll have to patch you up all the way when we get back," he explained as he gestured towards her stomach with his hand. Bright tendrils of light snaked through the air, winding their way around her before glowing and then dissipating into sparkling fragments of energy.

When the spell had done its job and healed Quistis—albeit temporarily, and only on the surface—Seifer wound his arm around Quistis' waist and they headed towards the convertible Quistis had stolen. They'd only been walking for a couple of seconds before Quistis started to feel lightheaded again, and she placed her hand on Seifer's forearm.

He looked over. "What? What's wrong?" he asked.

"I...I just feel dizzy. We might have to slow down…" she trailed off.

"Slow down? It's already gonna take us five years to get there, at the pace we're goin'," he rebutted.

"I know, I'm sorry, I just-" Quistis broke off in mid-sentence, the edges of her vision fading as dark tendrils crept across her eyes. She pressed her hand to her forehead, trying to shake the blurriness from her eyesight, but to no avail.

She swayed and Seifer reflexively tightened his hold on her to keep her upright, his eyebrows low over his eyes. Within seconds, Quistis lost consciousness and fell backwards, only to have Seifer sweep his arm underneath her knees and her upper back, cradling her gently. He stared down at her face with tight lips, before glancing at her blood-soaked clothing.

"Don't die on me now, Trepe," he mumbled as he ran towards the nearby car with Quistis unconscious in his arms.

* * *

Murmurs of quiet conversation, followed by the soft sound of a closing door, woke Quistis. She kept her eyes closed though, appreciating the darkness behind her lids.

Taking her time, she slowly cracked an eye open and sighed in relief when she saw that the room was nearly pitch black.  _It must still be nighttime. Wait...is it even the same day?_

When she attempted to sit up, a sharp spike of pain lanced through her and she hissed, wrapping her arm around her midsection in reaction to the unexpected agony. Leaning up against the headboard, she lifted the hem of her tanktop up, only to find that her stomach was hidden underneath layers upon layers of gauze. She sighed, letting her shirt fall back down to cover her injured midsection again.

 _The life of a SeeD. Just another scar to add to my collection,_ she thought bitterly as her eyes flitted around the room.

When she realized that her surroundings were familiar to her, her forehead scrunched up and she pinched her eyebrows together.  _This is..._ my _room._

The last thing she remembered was Seifer helping her to her feet after the suspect had ran off. They'd been all the way out by the Airstation and the Palace was quite a ways away—halfway across the city to be precise. She tried to search back through her memories, but found that she couldn't remember anything about how they'd gotten back to the Palace.

_He must've brought me back on his own. These bandages...I'm assuming the doctor patched me up. I wonder how bad it was?_

With inconvenient timing, her body reminded her that she was still human and currently had the pressing need to use the toilet. She let out a groan and swung her legs over the edge of the bed and tried to stand, her thighs shaking at the effort. As she made her way over to the attached bathroom, she dragged her fingers along the wall so that if her knees did give out, she could at least try to catch herself and avoid face-planting onto the floor.

She staggered into the room, flipping on the fluorescent lights as she passed through the doorway. A shiver ran through her when her bare feet touched the cold tile and, irritated, she thought,  _Every, single, time. You'd think people would invest in heated floor tiles._

She quickly took care of business, and ambled over to the sink to rinse her hands. As she finished, she glanced into the mirror at her reflection. Her hair was an absolute mess—tangled, knotted clusters of the normally fine strands stuck out in multiple different directions. Her eyes were slightly swollen, likely from sleeping for an extended period of time, which told her that it had been more than just a few hours since her last conscious memory. With stiff fingers, she rubbed the crusty remnants of her slumber from the corners of her eyes.

Now that she had ample time to process what had happened over the past few days, her obsessive-compulsive nature came back to haunt her and she started to tally up the list of things she could have done differently. The longer her mental list got, the more she seemed to shrink in on herself until the last,  _major_ thing she could've changed, drifted through her mind.

_Laguna...I could have just cast Protect on him and then I would've been able to stop the bullet that hit Squall...I could have prevented everything._

Tears welled up in her eyes at the realization that she'd failed yet  _again,_  and as the drops of moisture trailed down her cheeks, she buried her face in her hands and sobbed, her shoulders shaking as she quietly broke down, alone in the bathroom.

She sunk down onto the frigid porcelain floor, her sobs escalating in volume. For the next few minutes, she didn't move from that spot, feeling like her chest would implode from the heavy emotional weight that she could never seem to get rid of.

Over the sound of her weeping, she didn't realize that someone had walked in until she heard boots scuffing against the carpet. With a gasp, her head shot up and her gaze traveled up the length of dark cargo pants, past his casual white t-shirt, and up to his turquoise eyes.

Seifer stood in the bathroom doorway, staring down at her with his mouth tight. "The hell you doin' out of bed, Trepe?"

"I-I had to use the bathroom and…" she trailed off as she wiped her hands across her cheeks, trying to hide the fact that she was crying.

Apparently, it did little to hide the other evidence against her because Seifer sighed before stepping into the room. He held his hand out to her and she studied it intently, debating whether she wanted to accept his help or not.

"It's just a  _hand_ , Instructor. Whether you wanna admit it or not, you need help. It's gonna hurt like a bitch if you try and get up on your own," he insisted.

Hesitantly, she placed her hand in his and he pulled her to her feet in a surprisingly gentle manner. Once she stood in front of him, she averted her gaze, embarrassed that he'd walked in while she was having a mental breakdown.

Seifer placed his fingers under her chin and swiveled her head back around, so that he could look into her red, swollen eyes. He tsked at her before saying, "Let me guess: you're blamin' the whole damn thing on yourself right about now, aren't you?"

"It  _was_  my fault, Seifer. I took point on this mission. I should've made sure that I'd covered every possibility, protected every member of the team," she whispered.

"That's a lot of work for one woman. Even if that one woman is you, Trepe."

Quistis yanked her chin out of his grasp and dropped her gaze. "It was my responsibility."

"Like  _I_ was your responsibility?"

Her eyes darted up to meet his, and he raised his eyebrows at her in a single, sharp motion. "You blamed yourself for  _me_  when shit hit the fan during the war, too. You remember that?"

"I-I do but...how do  _you_  remember that?"

"I told you that I remember a lot more than people think I do. This wasn't your fault, Trepe. I know you feel like it was 'cause Puberty Boy got hurt on your watch, but he's capable of handling himself. And he's fine, by the way.

"Just because you were in charge and things went south, it doesn't mean it was automatically your fault. I was damn well capable of making my own decisions back then, and it was stupid that you blamed yourself for my involvement with E-Ulti-damn it, the  _sorceress_. That was  _my_ call, not yours."

"But if I had been a better instructor, guided you better, then maybe-"

"Will you stop?! For Hyne's sake, do you even hear yourself? You're makin' excuses so that you'll be in the right, so that you can justify taking the blame for everything. It's  _not_  your fucking fault!" he railed at her.

Tears spilled over onto her cheeks again and after letting out a shaky breath, she tried to argue, "You don't know that it isn't. What if I had made sure that Laguna was protected? What if I had been standing closer to Squall and had leapt for him instead? He wouldn't be lying in a hospital bed right now and Rinoa wouldn't be going through unneeded stress. She's pregnant for Hyne's sake!"

"Alright, one, Puberty Boy's been up and about for like two days. He's  _fine_. Two, how the hell were you supposed to know the psycho was gonna shoot  _him_ and not Pres?  _Three_ , so what? You gonna stress over shit  _for_  her? That ain't your job, Trepe. Your job isn't to be a friend. It's to be a leader, to be a  _SeeD_! You did what a SeeD is supposed to do in that situation: you protected your target, at all costs."

As she cried harder, she blubbered, "That might be...how you see it Seifer, but I-"

With a disgusted scoff, Seifer trapped her face in his hands and commanded, "Stop, Trepe. It's not your fault. And for fuck's sake,  _stop crying_. I can't handle seein' you like this."

"Then leave! I didn't ask you to come in here and pretend that you care!" she shouted.

Instead of responding to the antagonism in her voice like Quistis thought he would, Seifer brushed his thumbs across her cheeks instead, wiping away her tears for her. At the uncharacteristically compassionate gesture, she gasped and tried to lean away from him, unsure of how to react.

"Will you just let me fuckin' comfort you? Do you really hate it that much when I touch you?" he sniped.

She was about to retort and say yes until memories of the last time they'd been alone in a hotel room flashed back through her mind. A blush spread across her cheeks when she realized that no, as a matter of fact, she  _didn't_  hate when Seifer touched her. She'd just been in denial about how much she actually  _enjoyed_ it.

"I never said that I did," she mumbled.

"Well I never said I was  _pretending_  to care either, so I guess we're even," he responded, before pulling her into his chest and wrapping his arms around her shoulders.

Quistis stiffened for a moment before relaxing into his embrace and lifting her arms so that she could place them on his back. They stood there for a few silent minutes, entwined around each other. With her face pressed up against his bicep, she muttered, "Why  _do_ you care, Seifer? We were never exactly friends and during the war I...I was forced to make a lot of decisions that weren't to your benefit."

She could feel his chest rise and fall as he let out a long sigh. When he spoke, his deep voice resounded around her. "You were...When I saw you...damn it," he mumbled before trying again. "Seeing you there on the street like that, with your guts practically hanging out, bleedin' all over the place...I freaked out. The whole time the doctor was working on you, I couldn't sit still, I couldn't stop thinking, 'What if she dies?'. The fuck would I do if you  _died_?"

Suddenly, he changed the subject and asked, "Do you remember when we were kids? Back at the orphanage?"

After she nodded imperceptibly, he continued. "I was always chasin' you around and bullying you. I was such a little shit."

"Yes, yes you were," she readily agreed.

He chuckled and said, "When I got to Garden, you, Puberty Boy and Chicken-wuss had already forgotten about me. I was pissed. We'd spent most of our childhood together and I wasn't even important enough for you to remember me."

She tilted her head up and furrowed her eyebrows. "You know that's not why, Seifer. It was because of the GFs."

"Yeah, I know. I mean, I know that now. Back then though, I was just straight up  _pissed_. It got worse with every year and by the time you made Instructor and I was placed in your class, I did everything I could think of to get you to remember me."

" _That's_  why you always acted up in class?" she asked incredulously.

"Why the hell else would I be such a dick? I mean it was funny seeing you all red in the face but I had a reason for all of that shit. What, you thought I was just an asshole all the time?" he pressed.

Quistis' eyes darted back and forth as she mumbled, "Well...yes."

"Tch, figures. Anyway, I sound like a fuckin' pansy for admitting this but...I missed you. I missed teasing you, I missed that annoying giggle of yours," he said softly as he swept a loose strand of her golden hair behind her ear. As he traced his fingers along the outer edge of her ear, down to her earlobe, he murmured, " I've never heard you laugh since then, except for that time at the bar,"

"Oh…right," she gasped, a trail of warmth lingering where he had brushed against her skin.

His fingers drifted down to cradle her cheek and he brushed away the last remnants of her tears before whispering, "If I kiss you again, are you gonna punch me?"

"Wouldn't you just block it? No Seifer, I'm not going to punch you," she replied, shaking her head slightly.

"That's consent enough for me," Seifer mumbled before lowering his head, bringing his lips closer to hers at an excruciatingly slow pace. She moved her arms from his back to wrap around his neck, trying to pull him down faster as she tilted her head up. He chuckled and hovered over her, causing his breath to fan out and tickle her lips, and she licked them in anticipation.

"Someone's eager," he teased.

"No, I just want you to distract me," she admitted.

A smile spread across his face, a sight that was unfamiliar to Quistis, and she placed her hand on his cheek, her eyes widening in surprise. His expression quickly fell and he asked, "What?"

"You just...I've never seen you smile like that," she commented,

"Yeah, well...it happens," he mumbled as his gaze dropped and focused on her lips.

The air in the room seemed to thicken and he leaned down again, brushing his lips lightly across hers. Goosebumps broke out along her skin and she shuddered, causing Seifer to tighten his arms around her waist.

Finally, he pressed his lips firmly against hers and she gasped at the shock that coursed through her body. He used that to his advantage, and slid his tongue into her mouth, caressing it along the side of hers, causing waves of pleasure to roll through her lower abdomen.

Her fingers wandered up into his hair and she grasped the thick strands tightly, as the intensity of the kiss heightened. She didn't know how this was possible, considering they'd only done this once before, but it was as if Seifer knew exactly how she wanted—no,  _needed_ —to be kissed.

Skillfully, he rolled his tongue against hers, meeting her every movement with a twist of his own. Each time their tongues separated, only to reconnect, her heart jumped in her chest. By this point, it was beating so hard that she swore hecould hear it.

After a few minutes, Seifer broke away.. With rough hands, he pushed her back into the cabinet and when she bumped up against the hard surface, his pelvis pressed into hers, causing her to gasp. He had obviously enjoyed the kiss just as much as she did, because she could feel his hard length through the stiff material of his pants. His hands encircled her waist and he turned her around until she faced the mirror again.

Quistis raised her eyes and almost didn't recognize her own reflection. Her cheeks were flushed and her already pale irises looked even brighter in her excitement. Seifer lowered his head again and planted fleeting kisses along her neckline as he moved his hands down, his fingers lightly grazing across the skin above the waistline of her leggings. She sucked in a breath and her eyes slid shut at his touch, the sensitive skin of the curve of her hip tightening in anticipation.

The feeling of Seifer's fingers drifting through her hair elicited a soft moan from her, and she opened her eyes again in time to witness the golden waves of her hair cascading down onto her shoulders—he'd removed her clip. When she raised an eyebrow at him through the mirror, his expression morphed into something far more devilish than she was used to seeing, the corner of his lip curled up in a smirk..

After he brushed the fine strands forward onto her chest, he leaned in and whispered along her outer ear, "You should let your hair down more... _Instructor._ "

Normally she hated that damn word, but in this moment, in that deep, suggestive tone that he'd used, she found that she didn't mind it nearly as much as usual.

He swooped in then and nuzzled her before nipping gently along the edge of her neck. When she sucked in a breath, she could feel his smiling lips against her skin. His hands wandered up from her waist to hook underneath the hem of her tanktop, lifting it up inch by torturous inch as she watched their reflections.

Once his fingers skimmed the bottom of her bra, he paused and gazed into her eyes through the mirror, asking for permission. When she nodded, he leaned away and pulled her tanktop up and over her head. The sudden chill in the air caused her to tremble and after shrugging out of his t-shirt as well, he embraced her again from behind and the warmth of his skin on hers felt incredible.

She leaned into him, craning her neck back so that she could rest her head on his shoulder. He trailed his fingers up her stomach, pausing when he touched her bandages. Wrapping her fingers around his, she mumbled, "Don't stop."

At her command, he continued moving his hands up until he cupped her breasts in his palms, kneading them gently. A soft sigh left her lips and he reached up, peeling both of her straps from her shoulders. She lifted her arms and pulled them out of the straps, allowing him to reach behind her and unclasp the hook. Afterwards, he tossed her bra to the ground.

With nothing in the way now, he reached up again and grazed his thumbs over her nipples. A bolt of pleasure shot straight to her core and she let out a throaty moan that caused Seifer to glance up at her in the mirror.

"Seems like you're a fan of that," he teased.

She pinched the top of his hand in retaliation, and he feigned offense before pulling her around to face him again. Cupping the back of her head in his hands, he leaned in and kissed her passionately, his tongue stroking hers in all of the places he'd found earlier that sent shivers down her spine.

Without warning, he pulled away and moved down her body, taking her nipple into his mouth and flicking his tongue across the peaking bud. Throwing her head back as another moan escaped from her, she wound her fingers into his hair again and pulled, causing him to moan in return; the vibration from his throat seemed to reverberate through her body.

Releasing her from his mouth, he traveled farther down and hooked his fingers around the waistband of her leggings. Before he pulled them down, he glanced up at her, his turquoise eyes bright in the luminescence of the bathroom light. She nodded and he tugged them down ever so slowly, his eyes never leaving hers.

Once they were pooled around her ankles, she lifted her feet out of them and he pushed them aside, caressing the sides of her slender legs as he moved back up. He toyed with the band of her red lace thong before straightening completely and grabbing her tightly around the waist, lifting her up onto the cabinet's countertop. At the feeling of her abdomen stretching, she winced and when Seifer saw her face scrunch up, he froze and asked, "Are you okay?"

She nodded fervently before hooking her legs behind him. "Stop asking me that, Seifer. I'm not a porcelain doll. I'm fine," she insisted, and in order to bring the mood back, a sensuous smile teased at her lips as she pointed at the lower half of his body. "Is there a reason you still have your pants on and I don't?"

He laughed and backed up, bending at the waist to pull his boots off. They clattered onto the tile when he tossed them aside, and he undid his belt, shoving his pants off. He kicked them away as well, and now stood before her in nothing but his black boxer-briefs.

Quistis took the time to admire the view.

Seifer had always been fit; he had the type of build that was stockier than Squall's lean body, with broad shoulders and heavy muscle mass. His biceps were massive, and Quistis could follow the prominent vein in his upper arm all the way down into his sinewy forearms. From there, her eyes traveled back up to his wide chest, and then down past the ridges and indents of his rippling abs.

When her eyes traveled even lower, she averted her gaze at the last minute, avoiding the visible bulge in his underwear. It was funny—she'd enjoyed the feel of it pressing into her, but  _looking_  at it was something else entirely.

Seifer scoffed and stepped closer, causing her to tense, her shoulders hunching up. After coming to a stop in front of her, he grabbed her hand from her lap and pressed his hard length into her palm. At the intimate touch, her face turned bright red and she started sputtering in protest, trying to pull her hand away.

"If we're gonna do this, Trepe, you can't be shy," he stated.

"I'm  _not_  shy, I just...it's that…"

"Look at me," he commanded.

Timidly, she lifted her eyes from her lap and raised them to his. His vivid stare bore into hers, and she gulped down the lump in her throat.

"How 'bout you take over? Will that help?"

"W-What?"

"Here," he said as he moved closer, into the space between her legs. He lifted her hands and placed them at his hips, on top of the band of his underwear and continued. "Your turn."

Quistis opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out, so she closed it again with a snap. Hesitantly, she slipped her fingers underneath the elastic band, like he had done with her leggings earlier, and pushed down, little by little. The fabric caught on the tip of his member and she reached around the front, pulling the band up and then over, exposing him.

Seifer covered her hands with his and slowly helped her push his underwear completely off, hooking his arms underneath her knees afterwards and pulling her to the edge of the counter. He slowly pulled her lacy thong off and threw it over his shoulder, adding to the pile of discarded clothes on the floor before taking a step forward.

At the feel of his cock brushing against her wet slit, she moaned and he echoed her sentiment with a groan of his own. When he didn't do anything, she looked up at him and breathlessly asked, "What are you waiting for?"

"When was the last time you got your contraception shot from Kadowaki?"

Taken aback at the slight change in topic, Quistis stuttered when she replied, "U-Uh, a month ago. I'm good for another six months."

Seifer nodded before cradling her cheek in his hand. The rough calluses on his palm scratched against her skin as he questioned, "Are you  _sure_  you want this, Quistis? I don't want to be another one of your regrets."

"Oh Seifer," she reassured as she leaned into his touch. "You won't be. I want this."

He nodded again and crushed his lips to hers as he thrust up with his hips, entering her all the way to the hilt. If her mouth hadn't been otherwise occupied, she would've cried out. Instead, a muffled cry escaped her, only to be swallowed up by him. Her hands shot up to his shoulders and she dug her fingernails into the skin of his back, her chest heaving as she took in deep breaths through her nose.

Pulling back until only the head was still in, he broke the kiss and leaned his forehead against hers. He wound his arm around her, his fingers curling around her ribs, causing her to arch her back. Without warning, he thrust again. She let out a deep, guttural moan as she moved her hands from his shoulders to brace herself on the counter against the harsh jerk of his hips.

Each time he stroked her inner walls, it felt like the fire inside of her grew, like she was combusting from within. Her eyes slid shut and she threw her head back once more, lost in the throes of ecstasy. The sounds of his moans and her breathless gasps filled the room.

His rough hand trailed down her body, massaging her breast slightly before he lowered his mouth to latch onto her nipple again. Her lower abdomen fluttered with every flick of his tongue, and when he moved his hand down to the apex of her thighs, she inhaled sharply in surprise. With unpredictable motions, his fingers circled her clit, never once touching it directly—though he came close plenty of times.

She let out a frustrated cry and he chuckled around her nipple before straightening. Finally, he stroked against the sensitive bundle of nerves and a hoarse moan left her. His eyes darkened at the sound, and her inner walls quivered slightly around his cock, buried deep inside of her. He let out a husky groan, his head falling onto her chest.

Pulling out and placing his hand underneath her ass, he lifted her into the air. Not expecting the sudden motion, her arms quickly looped around his neck and she let out a squeak before asking. "What are you doing?!"

"I'm gonna finish this right. I'm taking you to bed," he insisted.

"Personally, I thought the counter was working out just fine," she quipped.

"Hey, I'm not  _dis_ agreeing," he replied as he carried her out of the bathroom and traipsed over to the bed. "I just want to watch you come on the  _bed_."

At his choice of words, she blushed again and he laid her gently on top of the comforter, climbing on afterwards. His hands encircled her ankles, lifting them up and placing them around his waist once more. In one fluid motion, he slid into her and she arched her back again. Planting his hands on either side of her head, he loomed over her as he drove into her, the motion of his hips relentless.

Her moans escalated in volume as the tension within her built. She dragged her nails down his back, her hands coming to a stop on his firm ass. When she squeezed his cheeks, he let out a strained moan, staring down at her with wide eyes.

"Well  _that_ was a surprise," he muttered into her ear.

She pulled his hips into hers, causing the spot on his pelvic bone above his penis to rub against her clit. A harsh cry left her and he tucked his legs underneath hers, rearing up so that he could start teasing the sensitive spot again. From higher up, Seifer was able to watch Quistis' lithe body undulate beneath him, as she arched her back every time he thrust into her.

When her moans became less throaty and more breathy, he switched from flicking her clit to pressing against it, alternating between using harder and lighter pressure. The searing heat within her spread to her extremities, and she could feel the tension in her lower abdomen reaching its peak. Her fingers wrapped around his forearms and in a raspy, breathless voice, she said, "Seifer, I...I…"

He leaned over just slightly so that he could still reach her clit and whispered, "Let go, Quistis. For once, trust me and let go. I want to see you lose control because of me."

She threw her head back, her brilliant golden hair spreading out in a halo around her as she cried out his name, and the world seemed to come to a complete standstill.

The sight of Quistis shattering into a million pieces as she orgasmed around him, paired with the feeling of her shuddering around  _his_  cock, caused Seifer to come as well and he let out a harsh grunt as he pulsed within her.

When Quistis came down from her high, Seifer's face was nestled against her neck and he was bent over at the waist, still buried inside of her. With arms that felt like lead, she lifted her hands and lightly massaged his scalp as she ran her fingers through his hair.

At her touch, he raised his head and gazed into her eyes, propping his head up against her, cradled in her arm. A smile teased at the corners of her lips and he laughed briefly when he saw it, asking in a gruff voice, "What're you smiling about?"

"I'm not allowed to smile?" she asked softly, feeling like she was floating on a cloud. Her limbs weren't numb necessarily, but she felt light, at ease... _comfortable_.

"Never said that. I already told you that you're beautiful when you smile."

Her smile widened and she continued caressing his scalp, causing him to groan softly at the relaxing sensation.

After a few minutes, he pulled out of her and got up from the bed, trekking over to the bathroom and returning with a towel shortly afterwards. With gentle hands, he cleaned the traces of their passionate, shared moment from her inner thighs, tossing the towel to the floor before climbing back on and laying down on his back, folding his arms behind his head.

She rolled over and placed her hand on his chest, snuggling into his side. He brought his arm down and curled it around her back, his fingers lightly tracing patterns into her skin. They laid there beside each other in silence, the soft sounds of their breathing filling the air. It was an easy silence though, nowhere even remotely close to the awkward silences they'd shared over the past few months.

As more time passed and neither one of them broke the silence, Quistis' eyelids kept fluttering shut and she fought her body's natural indication that she was falling asleep. When Seifer glanced down and saw that she was forcing herself to stay awake, he muttered, "Go to sleep, Trepe. I'll still be here when you wake up."

"Will you?" she murmured groggily.

"Yep."

"...Pro...mise?" she asked, her eyelids already completely closed as she slurred her words.

Seifer chuckled and in a soft, reassuring tone, replied, "I promise. I'm not leavin' ya."

Quistis hummed as she drifted off into the land of dreams, her cheek resting on Seifer's rigid chest, his arm wrapped protectively around her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, well, well. Ten chapters later and Seifer and Quistis finally get around to it. I know, I built up an insane amount of sexual tension so it's about time they did the dirty, am I right?
> 
> Thanks to Arenoptara and Layla Evercrest for beta-reading. Again, I'd love to hear your guys' thoughts. See y'all next time.


	11. Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Quistis is ordered to rest and Seifer takes up the investigation. A member of the old gang makes an appearance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case the summary did not make it clear enough, this chapter follows Seifer, and not Quistis. Usual closing notes at the bottom.
> 
> Enjoy!

* * *

_**Discovery** : get knowledge of, learn of, find, or findout;_

* * *

 Seifer’s life had never been perfect.

For Hyne’s sake, his earliest memory consisted of his time at an _orphanage_. From the get go, he knew he’d been unwanted. With every consecutive birthday, as he witnessed his “siblings” leaving with their new families, elated smiles plastered on their innocent faces, he began to understand that he’d never _be_ wanted.

It was a feeling he became all too familiar with when he was at Garden, years later. Aside from Fujin and Raijin, he’d never been able to really connect with anyone else, never managed to form a true friendship with anyone else. Even his former “siblings” didn’t care to remember him. Granted, he knew now that it was because of their use of GFs. Back then though, that was beside the point. It hadn’t mattered.

All that he knew was that he wasn’t wanted.

Yet, at this particular moment in his life, he felt otherwise. For once, things were falling into place. Things felt...perfect. He wasn’t a pussy so he’d never admit it aloud but frankly, that scared him. It _terrified_ him.

The only relationship he’d ever been in had been with Rinoa. Sure, they’d parted ways somewhat amicably, but what it boiled down to was that they _had_ parted ways. His longest relationship was a whole three months. Out of his entire twenty-one years on the planet.

He glanced down at the woman who was currently asleep in his arms. Her golden hair fanned out across his bicep, tickling his skin like the soft, downy edges of a feather. He ran his fingers through the fine strands, reveling in the way they drifted across his skin. She murmured a bit of incoherent nonsense before nuzzling her face into his chest again.

Seifer chuckled under his breath at how she could be so... _adorable_ when asleep. This was a woman who, when she was awake, was one of the deadliest fighters he’d ever known; who, with a flick of her wrist could decapitate a man; whose icy glare could make even the toughest, most seasoned warriors feel like a child who’d done something egregiously wrong.

Hyne knew he’d been a victim of that glare more than once.

A knock interrupted his musing and he pulled his arm away, laying her head back down on the pillow as gently as possible, so as not to wake her. He trekked into the bathroom and grabbed his clothes from where he’d unceremoniously tossed them last night, quickly tugging them on before making his way to the door.

Whoever was on the other side of the door knocked again and he called out, “One sec, I’m comin’!”

He yanked it open and a woman in a long, white labcoat stood in front of him, her auburn hair pulled up into a loose ponytail. When she spotted him in the doorway, her eyes widened and she stammered, “O-Oh, I was...this is Miss Trepe’s room, isn’t it?”

Seifer ran his hand down his face and sighed. “Yeah, she’s sleepin’ right now.” Recognition lit up his eyes and he continued on to say, “Oh hey, you’re the doctor who did the surgery, right?”

The woman nodded and replied, “Yes, Doctor Mills. I just came to check up on her. If she’s sleeping, I can—”

Quistis’ voice called out from behind him. “Seifer? Who is it?”

He glanced over his shoulder and Quistis appeared, dressed in her tank top and leggings from the day before. She rubbed the sleep from her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest when she saw Doctor Mills in the hallway.

“Good morning, Miss Trepe. I’m Doctor Mills, I performed the surgery on you a few days ago. I’m happy to see that you’re up and about,” Dr. Mills greeted as a small smile spread across her face.

Quistis returned the gesture and said, “I’m sorry, I can’t say that I _remember_ you.”

Dr. Mills nodded and waved her hand in the air dismissively. “Of course, of course. I just came to check up on you.” She lifted the rounded bag she was holding and finished with, “Do you mind if I take a peek under your bandage to see how your wound is healing?”

Quistis shook her head and headed back into the room. “No, that’d be fine. Please, come in. I’m sorry it’s messy. Again, I’ve been asleep for a little while.”

The two women brushed past Seifer and he shut the door before trailing after them. Quistis sat back down on the bed, against the headboard. After Dr. Mills placed her bag on the floor, she lifted Quistis’ tank top and began to unravel the bandage from her abdomen.

Seifer crossed his arms and leaned against the opposite wall, observing with intense curiosity. He’d been waiting outside in the hall during the surgery and had helped transport Quistis back to her room. The wound had been bad—worse than it had seemed initially. He was anxious to see how it looked now.

Dr. Mills finally pulled the last layer away and both she and Seifer sucked in a breath at what was revealed. A puckered red line slashed across Quistis’ lower stomach, from her right hip bone up to her navel. The skin around the wound was bright pink and looked extremely tender. Dark stitches criss-crossed over the wound, marring her otherwise perfect skin, and Seifer cringed at the disturbing sight.

“What in Hyne’s name?” Dr. Mills muttered. She glanced up at Quistis, her brows furrowed. “I instructed Mr. Almasy to ensure that you took it easy for the next few days. This looks _far_ too aggravated. You’ve been staying in bed, correct?”

Quistis blushed for a brief second before responding. “I—Yes, for the most part.”

Seifer coughed into his hand and Dr. Mills glanced over at him, before doing a double take. “Mr. Almasy, you were in charge of her care. If you’ve been keeping an eye on her, how do _you_ explain the fact that her wound is rubbed raw?”

He glanced down and mumbled, “Well I—we—shit.” He threw his hands up in the air before coming clean. “I was in here last night.”

Dr. Mills raised a slender eyebrow at him before asking, “Supervising _only_ , I hope.”

Seifer and Quistis glanced at each other before Seifer replied, “Not exactly, Doc. Sorry?”

Dr. Mills let out a long sigh before leaning over and lifting her bag into her lap. After she opened it and pulled out a small pile of medical supplies, she instructed Quistis to lay completely flat on the bed. Quistis obliged, her cheeks still slightly flushed from her embarrassment at getting caught.

“I understand that you two have been through a scare,” Dr. Mills began, as her hands moved quickly across Quistis’ stomach.

While she worked, she continued speaking. “Quistis, your condition was nowhere near as stable as I’d hoped after the surgery. I’m very happy to see that you’ve recovered quickly, and Mr. Almasy, I’m sure that _you’re_ happy to see that she’s doing fine. However, I’d advise you both to avoid any...extraneous activities, until these stitches are ready to come out.”

Quistis mumbled her agreement and a cocky grin spread across Seifer’s face. When Dr. Mills didn’t hear Seifer respond, she paused in her motions and glanced over at him. He immediately sobered his expression and nodded his consent, acting like the ever-innocent third party. Dr. Mills raised an eyebrow at him, but returned the gesture and looked back at Quistis, her hands moving once more.

“Mr. Almasy, I believe the President’s son wished to speak with you. He should be in the board room, if you’d like to go and meet him,” Dr. Mills called out, as her gaze remained focus on Quistis’ scar.

“Puber—Leonhart, did? He’s already back to working? Shit, he needs a life. Did he say when he wanted to see me? A shower would be nice first,” Seifer responded.

Dr. Mills shook her head. “I’m not sure when. I passed him in the hall on my way here. I’d assume he’s waiting there for you already.”

“Fuck, he’s impatient. All right, I’ll go now. You gonna be okay, Quis?” Seifer called out.

At his new nickname for her, Quistis started and Dr. Mills exhaled sharply at the sudden motion. After muttering an apology to the doctor, she looked up at Seifer and replied, “U-Uh, yes, I will be. I’ll see you later.”

Quistis averted her gaze afterwards and Seifer grabbed his boots from the bathroom, before heading out into the hallway. He made his way to the other end of the Palace and when he reached the board room, he shoved the door open unceremoniously and stomped as he walked in, announcing his arrival.

_Damn Puberty Boy. Summoning me like I’m his own personal GF._

Squall glanced up from where he was standing by the white board, his hand poised in the air, a marker held tightly in his grasp.

That was when Seifer noticed Zell sitting beside the Commander. “Hyne-damnit. The hell _you_ doin’ here, Chicken-wuss?” Seifer demanded.

Zell shot to his feet, his fists clenched tightly. The martial artist opened his mouth to retort, but Squall placed his hand on Zell’s shoulder, pushing him back down into the chair.

The Commander replied, “He’s here to help you. Don’t be an ass.”

“ _Help_ me? Leonhart, I don’t know if you’ve noticed or not but you paired me with Quis—Trepe, and raised up a huge fuckin’ stink about us stickin’ together. Now you’re pairin’ me with _him_?” Seifer exclaimed, pointing at Zell.

He’d almost slipped up and called Quistis by name. Sure, he called her by her given name to her face, but referring to her as anything other than ‘Instructor’ or ‘Trepe’ to everyone else would indicate that he actually gave two shits. He _did_ , but he didn’t think he was ready to admit that just yet.

Zell scoffed and Squall just stared at Seifer, his expression completely devoid of any emotions. Turning back to face the board, he continued copying information from the sheet in his other hand onto the erasable white surface. Without looking at Seifer, he said, “Sit, Almasy. We’ve got stuff to talk about.”

“Not a fuckin’ dog, Leonhart,” Seifer spat, before slamming the door shut behind him and sitting on the opposite side of the table from Zell.

“You know, I’m not happy to see you either,” Zell sniped.

“Yeah, whatever Chicken-wuss. Just shut up,” Seifer snapped.

“ _Both_ of you shut up,” Squall instructed as he popped the lid back onto the marker with a snap. He set it down on the board and turned around, eyeing both of them as he continued, “Quistis is obviously out for a little longer, Almasy. So in the meantime, Zell’s the only available SeeD I trust to replace her.”

“Why are you even up and walking around? Shouldn’t you be bedridden or something? With your little princess bringin’ you food and your mid-morning tea?” Seifer quipped at Squall.

At the mention of his condition, Squall rolled his shoulder and responded with, “I’m fine. I’m sore, but it’s not like I can’t _walk_.” He then mumbled, “I’m not an invalid.”

Seifer snickered and Zell narrowed his eyes at the blond gunbladist before saying, “Do you always have to be such a douche?”

“Bite me,” Seifer deadpanned.

Squall sighed before talking over them, his voice rising in volume until the two other men stopped bickering. “The plan is...to find the guy who shot me. At this point, we don’t know whether he was aiming for Laguna and missed, or whether he was intentionally aiming for me.”

“From my vantage point, sure as hell looked like he was aimin’ for you,” Seifer piped up. “Plus, I went toe-to-toe with the guy. Didn’t seem like the type to _miss_.”

Squall crossed his arms, his head lowering onto his chest as he thought.

The seconds ticked by in silence, and Zell waved his hand in front of Squall. “Yo, Squall! I know you like to think to yourself a lot but, keep us in the loop, yeah?”

The stoic brunet shook his head. “Sorry. Habit. So,” he began, before looking at Seifer, “you think he’s trained?”

Seifer nodded and kicked his feet up onto the table, propping his hands behind his head. “Oh yeah. Ex-military maybe?”

“It’s possible. You said you’d seen him before?” Squall asked as he shoved Seifer’s feet off of the lacquered surface.

“Yeah. Trepe and I went to check out some condo down the street and this guy popped up outta nowhere. Said the guy we were lookin’ for had moved,” Seifer replied.

Zell sputtered and interrupted with, “W-Wait, you and Quisty were looking at condos?”

“Not to like, move into, or whatever the hell it is you’re thinkin’. If you’d been listening, you woulda caught the part where I said ‘the guy we were lookin’ for’. One of the leads from the call log was a Marcus Bywater,” Seifer explained.

“And the man who interrupted you at Marcus’ condo, was the man who shot me?” Squall clarified.

“Seems that way.”

Squall nodded, processing the information. He turned back to the board and scribbled ‘Marcus Bywater’ across it, then commanded, “You two are heading back to that condo. I want you to get inside and tear it apart. Try to find anything that would relate him to the case, or might give you a clue as to who the shooter was.”

“Guy claimed to live two doors down from Marcus. Trepe got the names off their doors before we hightailed it outta there. I can check them out, too,” Seifer offered.

“Do it. I want this guy found,” Squall stated.

Seifer nodded and he and Zell rose, making their way over to the door. Zell walked out into the hallway and Seifer caught the door before it closed, propping it open. He looked back at Squall and asked, “You headin’ back to Garden, then?”

Squall turned back around and crossed his arms. “I’m not heading back to Garden now, no way in hell. We’re finding this guy.”

Seifer chuckled once and replied, “Never thought we’d be working together on this—hell, on anything. Figured your baby momma would send ya back to Balamb by now.”

Squall narrowed his eyes at Seifer. They stared each other down in silence for a few seconds until Squall spoke again, his voice low.

“No. I’m not going back to Balamb. Now? This is personal.”

* * *

 The heavy wooden door slammed into the wall, rattling on its hinges from the sheer force that it’d been hit with.

Zell lowered his leg, his stance poised and refined. Seifer slow-clapped as he begrudgingly admitted, “That was...impressive, Chicken-wuss.”

“Tch, it was no big deal,” Zell replied as he brushed his fist across his nose.

“Yeah alright, forget I said anything. Get inside,” Seifer prompted, grabbing the sleeve of Zell’s shirt and swinging him through the open doorway.

Once he’d followed after the martial artist, he shut the door and locked it to buy them a bit more time—though hopefully, they wouldn’t need it.

When he turned back around, he swore under his breath at the sight that greeted him. Marcus Bywater’s condo was...a downright warzone. Papers covered every inch of every surface and were piled so high, Seifer wondered how any of the stacks hadn’t fallen over yet. Then again, maybe some had, because the floor was impossible to see. Before he’d left, Marcus had drawn the curtains, cloaking the entire living room in darkness, which didn’t help visibility in the slightest.

Seifer stepped farther into the room, documents crunching under his boots. As he swept his gaze from right to left, Zell piped up from the window on the opposite side of the room.

“Where the heck are we supposed to start?” the martial artist asked, his voice tainted with discouragement.

“I have no fuckin’ clue,” Seifer exhaled. After a second, he pointed to the left and instructed, “You take that side. I’ll start over here.”

“Gotcha,” Zell confirmed, pulling the curtains open before he hopped over a document-covered ottoman, and headed to the opposite end of the room.

Seifer wandered to his right, making his way down the hallway towards what he assumed was the bedroom. Hesitantly, he grabbed the doorknob, placing his opposite hand on the handle of his gunblade. As he turned the knob, his fingers tightened around Hyperion’s leather-wrapped hilt and he shoved the door open, bracing himself for any sudden movements.

When nothing moved and he didn’t hear any noises beyond Zell shuffling through papers down the hall, he straightened and flipped on the light switch, blinking rapidly as the overhead fluorescent lights flickered on.

“Shit, does this guy ever clean?” he commented.

This room wasn’t any better than the last.

A metal desk sat against the wall to Seifer’s left. Beneath the paper-strewn surface lay a desk chair, tossed over onto its side, its wheels completely still. On the wall in front of Seifer stood a bookshelf that stretched from floor to ceiling. Oddly enough, its shelves were nearly bare. A few volumes were propped up against the edges, but for the most part, it was the only object in the room that wasn’t completely buried under documents.

Seifer drifted into the room, making his way over to the desk. He brushed some of the uppermost sheets aside, his eyes quickly scanning over their contents for any pertinent information. When it looked like most of the papers were just bills or useless junk, he scoffed under his breath and crossed his arms over his chest, looking over at the other side of the room.

A green, leather-bound tome caught his eye, and he lowered his eyebrows as he stalked over to the bookshelf. Running his finger down the book’s spine, he muttered the title under his breath.

“ _Estharian Presidents_...Do people here actually give a shit about their own history?” he mumbled to himself as he pulled the volume off of the shelf.

With a casual turn of his wrist, the book flopped open in his hand and he quickly flipped through the pages, until he reached the current era. A black and white, grainy photograph of Laguna sat in the uppermost corner along the edge of the left page. A goofy, lopsided grin was plastered on Laguna’s face and Seifer rolled his eyes at the sight.

“Some dad Leonhart’s got,” he quipped.

His bright eyes flitted left and right as he read the blurb about Laguna’s past in the Galbadian army, his time in Esthar before he’d become President, and how he’d managed to imprison Adel. A wave of reluctant admiration flowed through him.

_Pres is an idiot, but he’s done some good shit. More than I can say for myself_ , he thought bitterly.

Irritated at his train of thought, he tossed the book back onto the shelf and reached for the next one: ‘Laguna Loire: President by Day, Journalist by Night’.

_Is this guy obsessed with Pres? For fuck’s sake…_

Seifer thumbed through the second book, pausing to read pages here and there. There was a long section about Laguna’s time with the Galbadian army—everyone seemed to like to write about his soldier days—as well as the events leading up to his presidency. This book seemed to delve deeper than most, as it mentioned his brief marriage to a woman named Raine, as well as focusing on his relationship with Ellone, Ward and Kiros for the majority of a chapter.

He reached up and placed the book back on its shelf and turned, intent on heading back to the living room to see how Zell was faring. When he swiveled on his heel, a slight breeze tickled against his cheek and he whirled back around, his eyes wide.

_The fuck?_

Standing stock-still, his eyes darted back and forth as he tried to find the source of the unexpected draft. There wasn’t a fan on the desk and even if there had been, nothing had been turned on when he’d walked into the room a few minutes ago. In his mind, he went back over his actions from the past five minutes and repeated the motions as he remembered doing them. Once he set the book down once more, like he had earlier, he turned towards the door again.

Just like the first time, a slight puff of wind hit his cheek and he exclaimed, “What the hell?”

Seifer stood in front of the bookshelf, his hands on his hips as he glared at the offending piece of furniture. Rapid footsteps traveled down the hall and Zell screeched to a halt in the doorway, his chest heaving.

“What? What’s going on?” he breathed.

“This fuckin’ bookshelf keeps huffin’ air at me!” Seifer yelled.

“Uh, the bookshelf? Dude, are you high?” Zell questioned as he walked farther into the room.

“Fuck you, Chicken-wuss, I ain’t high. Every time I set this book down and turn around, I feel a fuckin’ draft,” Seifer replied, gesturing to the bookshelf.

“Hmm,” Zell responding, tapping his finger against his chin as he stared at the piece of furniture in question. “Here, let me try.”

Seifer moved back to let Zell step forward, and the other blond grabbed the same book Seifer had been holding earlier. He chuckled shortly at the title before setting it back down on the shelf. Slowly, Zell turned to the right and Seifer piped up.

“No, I turned the other way, dumbass,” he commented.

“Well, how the heck was I supposed to know that?” Zell retorted. He faced the bookshelf again and this time, pivoted the other way.

Mid-turn, Zell’s eyes widened and he twisted back around, staring up at the bookcase in confusion. “Seriously! What the heck?!”

“I told you I wasn’t fuckin’ crazy,” Seifer muttered as he sidled up to Zell. “You felt it too, right?”

“Yeah, I did. On my right cheek,” Zell replied.

Seifer nodded and crossed his arms over his chest as he glared at the bookshelf. “Same. There’s gotta be something here. You don’t just get breezes in an enclosed room.”

“Maybe there’s something behind the shelf?”

“...C’mere. Help me move this damn thing,” Seifer instructed as he stood beside the bookshelf. He wrapped his fingers around the edge of the shelf and tugged, grunting at the effort. “This thing is...fuckin’ heavy...as fuck.”

Zell rolled his eyes and walked over to the other end of the shelf, waiting until Seifer had inched out the tall piece of furniture before he braced his palm against the opposite edge. When Seifer pulled, Zell pushed, and in no time, the massive bookshelf was out of the way.

“Wow, look at this,” Zell called over to Seifer, waving his hand at the blond gunbladist.

Seifer grumbled at being beckoned to like a dog, but acquiesced with a glare. When he stood shoulder-to-shoulder with Zell, he said, “Well, I’ll be damned. It’s a fuckin’ hidden door. Doesn’t this only happen in books or some shit?”

Zell glanced at Seifer out of the corner of his eye and snidely replied, “Bro, do you even read? And actually, you’d be surprised. A lot of people have hidden doors.”

Seifer scoffed and nudged Zell out of the way, making his way over to the door. He tried to turn the handle but it was locked and he exhaled in frustration. _Of-fuckin’-course it’s locked._

“Just pick it, dude,” Zell said from behind him.

“Shut up, will ya?” Seifer retorted, while he crouched down in front of the knob and pulled out his lock picking kit. It was the same one he’d used—or tried to use—the first time he’d been at this condo.

After a minute or two of attempted concentration—Zell kept tapping his foot against the carpet, much to Seifer’s annoyance—they heard the successful click of the door unlocking, and Zell pumped his fist into the air.

“Oh yeah! Way to go!” he shouted.

“I think that’s the first and only time I’ll accept a compliment from you. Never again, got it?” Seifer replied, getting to his feet.

“Whatever, man. Open the door!” Zell pressed.

“Alright, alright! Shit, you’re one impatient son of a bitch,” Seifer retorted.

He grabbed the door handle and turned. The sound of the hinges creaking loudly in protest made both Seifer and Zell wince. Once the door had been opened all the way, Seifer crouched down and stepped into the hidden room, with Zell right on his heels. The room was pitch black, so they inched forward hesitantly, unsure of what they might bump into or set off.

They’d only gone far enough to allow both of them to crouch inside of the doorway, and Zell tapped Seifer’s shoulder, indicating for him to stop. Then, Seifer reached out, blindly groping along the wall for a switch of some sort.

Zell mumbled “Ouch” before he said, “Oh, here!”

Light flooded the room, blinding Seifer momentarily. He squeezed his eyes shut, covering his upper face with his hand while he tried to adjust to the sudden brightness. “Holy Hyne, Dincht. Warning, much?” he chided.

“Uh...you might wanna see this, Seifer,” Zell muttered.

Seifer lowered his hand, blinking rapidly in an attempt to expedite the process. When he glanced back up, his mouth dropped open.

“What...the... _fuck_?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all of those who left kudos and comments :) They keep me going! 
> 
> As always, thanks to Arenoptara and Layla Evercrest for beta-reading. Hope you guys liked the chapter and of course, I'd love to hear your thoughts!


	12. Camaraderie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer and Zell learn a bit more about the 'suspect' and return to the Presidential Palace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter still follows Seifer. We'll return to Quistis next chapter!

* * *

_**Camaraderie:** comradeship; good-fellowship._

* * *

All four walls that made up the tiny hidden room were covered in photographs of Laguna, from floor to ceiling: Laguna standing on the side of the street, speaking with the citizens of Esthar; Laguna waving to people from various platforms at different public events throughout the years; Laguna doing everyday, mundane things, like gardening in the Palace's indoor courtyard.

A cluster of photographs on the far wall caught Seifer's eye and he rose to his feet, now that the ceiling was revealed to be of standard height. The section had caught his eye because Laguna appeared to be younger in those than he did in any of the other photos. He traipsed over to the section in question and stuck his finger under the corner of a particularly grainy black and white photograph, lifting the edge up slightly.

In the photo, Laguna was standing next to a young Ellone—she couldn't have been older than five—in a seemingly quaint village. The houses were obviously older—some of the shingles on the roof were missing and the white plaster underneath contrasting designs of dark wood appeared to be chipping off. Laguna was waving at whoever had taken the picture, bent over at the waist so that he could place his arm around Ellone's little shoulders.

Out of the corner of his eye, Seifer caught a glimpse of an official SeeD uniform, and he glanced over at the photo beside the one of Laguna and Ellone. The young man in the photo had chestnut-colored hair like Laguna—though it was shorter. However, he was looking down at the ground, which caused his hair to fall forward and hide his face.

Zell sidled up to Seifer and pointed at the photo, exclaiming, "Hey, that's Squall!"

Seifer raised an eyebrow and responded, " _That's_  what Puberty Boy looks like in uniform?"

"Yo, you've seen him in it before. This looks like it was taken at the graduation ball. I don't remember anyone taking photos that night though…" Zell trailed off.

Seifer crossed his arms as he inspected the photo. "He looks like he's leavin' the ballroom. Who would've taken this?"

"This Bywater guy, maybe?" Zell suggested.

"Nah, the angle is from above, meaning they were probably standing on the second floor. How would  _Bywater_  have gotten into Garden?"

Zell shrugged. "Seems like this guy's pretty good at being in places he shouldn't be. I wouldn't put it past him. Better question is, why is he so obsessed with  _Laguna_?"

At that, Seifer turned around and swept his gaze across the room, taking in all the pictures of said President. A minute passed before he sighed and mumbled, "That's a damn good question. There's gotta be somethin' in here that'll give us a clue."

Zell jumped in place as if he'd gotten an electric shock, and held his finger up in the air. "Wait! The books on the shelf! Both of them mentioned Laguna's time in the war. You've seen him, right? How old is this Marcus guy?"

" _I_  don't know what Marcus fuckin' looks like. It was his  _neighbor_ that told us Marcus had moved out. Pretty damn suspicious though, considering it looks more like Marcus jumped ship," Seifer replied. A second later, he added, "Qui—Trepe said she didn't believe the guy though, and went to check out the neighbors' nameplates. Never looked into 'em."

Zell placed his hands on his hips and tapped his foot on the floor. "Hmm…"

While Zell was lost in thought, Seifer moved towards the door that led back out into the study. "Keep lookin' around in here. I'm gonna run back out into the hall and do a quick search on both of the neighbors. Be right back."

The martial artist nodded and crouched, inspecting another cluster of photographs as Seifer bent over and stepped back into the previous room. He hurried back towards the front door and yanked it open.

As he stood in the open doorway, he scanned the hall to ensure he was alone. When he saw that the coast was clear, he tried to remember how far Marcus' "neighbor" had said he'd lived down the hall.

_...I live two units down so I've talked to him from time to time…_  the man's voice echoed throughout Seifer's mind.

When he'd spoken to them, Quistis and Seifer had been leaning against the wall beside the door, facing towards the elevator, which was now to Seifer's right. The guy had pointed past them, to the two units at the left end of the hall.

_Left it is, then_ , Seifer thought.

Once he was standing in between the units that were two doors down, he pulled out his phone and opened the same database that Quistis had been using at the restaurant they'd stopped at for lunch, nearly five days ago.

_Fuck, can't believe it's been that long already_.

He paced back and forth in a small arc as he waited for the database to boot up, and when it was finally finished, he clicked on the search field and entered in the name on the plate to his left.

The only 'Wilson' who lived in the same building was a Teresa Wilson, so it was  _definitely_  not that unit. The unit on the right was labeled 'Parker' and that was slightly more complicated. According to the database, the Parkers were a family of four: two dads, a teenage son, and a younger daughter.

Seifer meandered over to the little outcropping underneath the window and leaned against it as he dug a little further into the history of Mr. Parker and Mr. Parker. According to the database, one of the Mr. Parkers had been born here in Esthar, and hadn't gone anywhere since. He worked here, he obviously lived here, and he was a firm supporter of the Esthar Gespers, the professional Triple Triad team.

The other Mr. Parker was an expatriate from Dollet. He'd served in the Dolletian Army, which raised a few red flags in Seifer's memory, until he remembered that Laguna had served in the  _Galbadian_  Army. Plus, this Mr. Parker was about fifteen years younger than Laguna. The President had been retired for four years already by the time Mr. Parker enlisted, so they likely had never crossed paths.

With that knowledge in mind, Seifer lowered his phone with a sigh, staring at the Parkers' front door in irritation. He shouldn't have expected it to be so easy, but he wouldn't have complained if it  _had_  been.

A stroke of luck would've come in handy right about now.

He pushed off of the windowsill and traipsed back to Bywater's condo, locking the door behind him once more. As he made his way back to the study, he called out, "You found anything yet, Chicken-wuss?"

A groan filtered out into the hallway and Zell shouted back, "I thought you were done with that, man?"

Seifer chuckled as he rounded the corner into the room and spotted Zell sitting cross-legged on the floor by the bookshelf. He leaned against the doorframe and said, "I take it you found somethin'?"

"Yeah, c'mere," Zell beckoned.

Seifer narrowed his eyes at the other blond as he trekked into the room, using his boots to nudge aside papers on the floor, before he crouched down next to Zell.  _Is everyone going to keep callin' me over like that?_

"Look at this," Zell instructed, placing his finger on the photograph in the book of Laguna, Kiros, and Ward by a blue cave with shimmery walls.

"What the hell am I lookin' at, exactly?" Seifer pressed.

"According to this article, Laguna and the gang kind of, accidentally, infiltrated this Estharian excavation site. This book is Estharian history, right?"

"I think it's just a history on Pres himself," Seifer replied.

"Oh, well, either way. So in the book, it says that a handful of Estharian soldiers who'd been posted there on guard, died that day. Obviously because Laguna and them were like, infiltrating it, right?"

"Yeah, I get that. You gonna get to the point sometime today, Chicken-wuss?" Seifer taunted.

Zell glared up at Seifer before he continued moving his finger along the lines of text. "Says here, 'In remembrance of the Estharian soldiers who died in the line of duty: Clark Fabul, Ronan Bywater, and Lenny Pritchard.'"

"Woah,  _Bywater_?" Seifer echoed, ripping the book out of Zell's hands.

The martial artist sighed in defeat. He stood up and brushed off the backs of his pants. "Yeah, Bywater. That's why I wanted you to look at it! How old did you say Marcus was again?"

Irritated at having to repeat himself yet again, Seifer snapped, "I  _didn't_. Never saw Marcus. Saw his neighbor."

"Oh, right. Let me borrow your phone."

At the sudden switch in topic, Seifer glanced up and raised an eyebrow. "Don't you have your own?"

"It's dead," Zell replied.

With an exasperated sigh, Seifer pulled his phone out of his jacket's inner pocket and tossed it over to Zell. He continued to read the article as Zell's fingers flew across the keyboard. The room fell silent as they both concentrated on their individual tasks, until Zell shouted, "A-ha! Found him."

"Who, Marcus?" Seifer asked, his head shooting up to look at Zell.

"No, but I found  _Ronan_  Bywater. Obviously he was a citizen at one point, if he was in the Estharian Army."

"Lemme see," Seifer demanded. Zell handed the phone over and the screen showed a man who would forever be in his thirties. He quickly scrolled through the information sheet and when he saw who was listed under 'next of kin', he shook his head in disbelief.

"Well shit. Marcus is Ronan Bywater's son," Seifer stated.

Zell nodded, his expression neutral. "Makes sense. That means that Laguna killed Marcus' dad at the excavation site, like twenty years ago. Which then explains the creepy pictures in that room over there."

"Yeah but...where the hell is Marcus, then?" Seifer asked, frustration lacing his words.

"You tried looking up Marcus in this, yet?" Zell questioned.

Seifer nodded and said, "Trepe did. That's how she found the address to this condo. There's no picture in the database though, for whatever fuckin' reason."

Zell stroked his chin and hummed as he thought. Eventually, after a minute or so, he suggested, "I think we need to find out what Marcus looks like."

"No shit, Captain Obvious. How?" Seifer retorted.

Zell threw his hands up in the air and replied, "I dunno, man! Just tryin' to think of ideas! There's gotta be at least  _one_  picture of the guy in his own house."

Seifer placed the book back on the shelf and turned around, heading back for the living room. "Condo, Zell. It's a condo, not a house. Big difference."

Zell lagged behind Seifer, right on the other man's heels, and pointed at his retreating back in excitement. "Hey, you called me Zell!"

"Thanks for pointing that out, Chicken-wuss. Never again," Seifer commented as they wandered into the kitchen.

"Aw, come on, man!"

Seifer started pulling out kitchen drawers and opening cabinets—not exactly in tactful silence—looking for any sort of hint or clue at Marcus' appearance. He had a suspicious feeling that the 'neighbor' might be the very guy they were looking for, but he couldn't say that for certain without concrete evidence. Eventually, he left everything in the kitchen in absolute disarray as he wandered back over to the living room. "No pictures on the fridge, either. There's no way in hell we're gonna find  _any_ thing of value in this clusterfuck."

Zell pointed at the hall on the opposite side of the room and asked, "What about over there?"

"Didn't you check over there earlier, when I asked you to?"

"Well, no, you said check out that side of  _this_  room. I haven't gone down that hall yet," replied Zell.

"For fuck's sake. He could've been hiding out over here and ambushed us, or somethin'!" Seifer reprimanded.

Zell clenched his fists and tensed up, sneering at Seifer as he defensively replied, "I was out here the whole time! There's no one else in here!"

"Doesn't the SeeD manual say that rule number five or whatever, is to make sure the perimeter is  _secure_?" Seifer sniped as he brushed past Zell and headed down the opposite hallway.

"I bet you've never even read the rulebook!" Zell retorted as he chased after Seifer.

Without looking over his shoulder at the martial artist, Seifer spat, "Yeah, because I wasn't ever a SeeD, dickwad."

Sounding thoroughly chagrined, Zell replied, "Oh right, sorry bro."

Seifer made a noise in his throat that sounded like a mixture of severe disgust and annoyance. As they made their way to the end of the hall—in silence, much to Seifer's relief—they spotted two doors that stood perpendicular to each other.

Seifer beelined for the one straight ahead, pointing to the one on the left as he instructed, " _You,_  take this one."

"Tch, just call me Zell, man! 'You' is even more insulting than Chicken-wuss," Zell threw back.

"Fine. Chicken-wuss, take this one," Seifer deadpanned as he slid up to the other door.

"Whatever, man," Zell mumbled, bringing his fist up in front of his face as he grabbed the handle with his other hand.

Seifer mirrored his action, wrapping his fingers around the cold metal handle of his assigned door. He glanced back at Zell who met his gaze and they nodded at each other, shoving their doors open simultaneously.

The doors thudded against the walls behind them, but other than the loud thump, no other sounds came back to them. Seifer flicked the light switch, and a lamp on the opposite end of the room turned on, flooding what was apparently the bedroom with a soft glow. To his surprise, this appeared to be the  _only_  room in the entire condo that didn't look like a tornado had blown through.

The bed was neatly made, with the covers tucked in underneath the mattress. Seifer recognized it as the trademark military standard fold, and surmised that since Ronan had been in the Estharian Army, he'd likely held Marcus to the same level of cleanliness.

_Why the fuck is the rest of the house such a shitstorm, then?_

He moved farther into the room, trailing his fingers along the dresser that sat just past the door span. When he lifted his fingertips, there was a slight coating of dust on them, which would imply that Marcus  _didn't_  clean often, or that he hadn't slept here in at least a week.

Moving his hand lower, he hooked his fingers underneath the drawer pull and tugged it open, revealing piles of clothing—folded just as neatly as the bedsheets. He rifled through them, not particularly caring to keep things in perfect order, since it didn't seem like Marcus would be coming back to his condo  _any_  time soon.

Grunting when nothing of interest seemed to pop up, he turned away from the dresser and made his way over to the nightstand. After plopping down on top of the comforter, he wrenched the top drawer open first. People usually stuffed their most important belongings in the top drawer, didn't they?

There was nothing in the top drawer except for a reading glasses case and, frustrated, Seifer shoved the drawer shut, causing the nightstand to rattle against the wall behind it. With a sharp exhale, he pulled open the bottom drawer and was met with utter chaos again.

"Fuck me," he muttered, sifting through the haphazard pile of papers that were nearly spilling over onto the floor. How Marcus had managed to get the drawer shut in the first place, baffled Seifer.

Zell walked into the room then and announced, "The other door led to the bathroom. Nothin' but lots of toilet paper in there. D'you find anything?"

Seifer sighed and wrapped his hands around as many papers as he could fit in his grasp, subsequently throwing the pile over his shoulder onto the bed behind him. "Here. Start going through this shit."

"Holy...I'm starting to hate this guy already," Zell commented.

"I think I'm past hate. I fuckin' wanna strangle this dick," Seifer sneered.

Zell laughed and came around to the other side of the bed, reaching over to stack sheets of paper into neat piles so that he could sort through them. Seifer forewent the whole 'organizing process' and just started pulling out individual pieces with no rhyme or reason, reading them to determine whether they were of importance. If they weren't, they were tossed on to the floor.

So far, every single piece of paper was landing on the carpet.

Short of about five minutes later, Zell piped up and said, "Nothing in this pile."

Seifer straightened and replied, "I'm almost to the bottom of this junk heap. I haven't seen anything worth bringin' back. Not even a Girl Next Door."

"You  _read_  those?"

"You can't  _read_  girly mags, idiot."

"What about the articles?"

Seifer turned and glared at his moronic partner.

"Ugh, you know what I meant," Zell groaned.

Seifer leaned over and went back to shuffling around papers. "...No, I don't  _read_  those. Why bother, when you can go out and find a  _real_  woman?" Seifer countered.

As soon as the words left him, a flashback of the night he'd seen Quistis at the bar in Balamb hit him. That slinky red number she'd been wearing, paired with the heels she'd had on that made her legs seem to stretch on for miles...those  _legs_...

Zell scoffed and the sound pulled Seifer out of his reverie. He felt the mattress sink a little bit and turned to see that Zell had sat down on the opposite edge of the bed. He stared at the martial artist as he continued to move papers aside in the drawer, until his fingertips bumped up against the spine of a small, leather-bound book.

"Oh? Maybe he might have a girly mag in here after all," Seifer joked, pulling the book out from underneath a stack of papers.

_Definitely not a girly mag._

The book had no title on the cover, just intricate gold swirls and details that ran along the edge of the front panel. Nothing was written on the spine or the back cover either, so Seifer popped the volume open, laying it flat against his hand. It appeared to be a journal of some kind, and the entries were dated about a month apart.

' _June 15th. Went to the Presidential Palace again today, but no sign of Laguna. Saw a bunch of staff members bringing out folding chairs and a long table. Maybe something's going on?'_

' _June 17th. Something is definitely going on. Adel Memorial Week is coming up next week. Maybe there's an event scheduled? That might be the perfect time.'_

' _June 21st. Tomorrow kicks off the start of Memorial Week. Apparently there's a parade after Laguna gives some speech, followed by fireworks. I remember Dad talking about Memorial Week a lot. Guess Loire likes to pull out all the stops for the parade and the firework show. Fireworks have loud noises. That might be perfect.'_

' _June 22nd. Found out this morning from a source that Laguna's son, Squall, who is coincidentally the Commander of Balamb Garden's SeeDs, will be in town for the festivities. Maybe...maybe instead of Laguna...Squall will do.'_

"...Shit," Seifer muttered.

Zell shot up off the bed and raced over to stand in front of Seifer, leaning down into Seifer's face as he tried to read what the book said. Seifer planted his hand on Zell's chest and shoved,  _hard_ , causing the martial artist to stumble backwards.

"My face—get out of it," Seifer chided, tossing the journal at Zell.

That's what the book appeared to be anyway, a journal. Marcus Bywater's journal. In turn, Marcus Bywater's "neighbor" appeared to be Marcus Bywater. The same guy who'd shot Squall because Squall's father, Laguna, killed Marcus' dad.

_Seriously. What a clusterfuck. Well, now we know for sure that he shot Squall on purpose. Puberty Boy ain't gonna be happy to hear_ that _bit of news_.

Seifer looked up at Zell and watched the other man read the diary, his lips moving as he mouthed the words to himself. He chuckled under his breath as he waited for him to finish reading.  _Little Chicken-wuss still needs to read aloud, heh. Wonder if he'll punch me if I point that out?_

_Probably,_  he finished thinking with a smirk.

Finally, Zell snapped the book shut and looked at Seifer, his eyes wide. "We gotta head back and tell Squall!"

"Sure do. Grab the book from the study that mentioned this guy's dad. Could come in handy as evidence," Seifer instructed as he rose to his feet and shuffled out into the hallway.

"Why don't  _you_  grab it?" Zell questioned, right on Seifer's heels.

"Because, I just told  _you_  to do it. Just go get it, so we can leave!"

"Tch, fine."

Zell ran past Seifer down to the other end of the condo and disappeared into the study. Seifer watched him go, the spikes of his ridiculous hair-do bouncing with every step. He laughed at the sight and wandered over to the front door.

With a grin on his face, Seifer called out over his shoulder, "Hurry up, Chicken-wuss! Let's go tell the Commander!"

* * *

About a half an hour later, Seifer and Zell waltzed in through the sliding double glass doors of the Palace's front lobby. After nodding to the receptionist who waved them past, they climbed up to the second floor and hurried down the hall to the conference room.

Nearly half the day had gone by and it was impossible to know whether Squall had waited for them the entire time. Knowing the Commander's work ethic though, Seifer figured it was a good place to check first.

Zell pushed open the door and barged into the room, shouting, "Squall, guess what we—hey, he's not in here."

Seifer paused in the doorway behind Zell, retracing his steps back out into the hallway. "Hm, where oh where could Puberty Boy have gone?"

"Are you guys looking for Squall?"

Seifer and Zell whirled to their right, spotting Rinoa approaching them with her arms cradling her baby bump. She had a slight smile on her face when she saw them frozen in the hallway and came to a stop, rocking back on her heels.

"If you are, he's not here. He and Laguna went out to lunch about a half hour ago," she finished.

"Lunch? It's like two in the afternoon!" Zell exclaimed.

Rinoa shrugged and replied, "I guess Laguna eats lunch late? He should be back soon-ish."

Seifer groaned and ran his fingers through his hair. He just wanted to pass on the info to Mr. Leader and head back to see how Quistis was doing. This just prolonged his absence from her, and it was making him antsy. He couldn't exactly  _say_  that though, so he just shifted in place.

Rinoa tilted her head at Zell and slyly suggested, "Zell, I hear they have mini hot dogs in the kitchen…"

As soon as she mentioned "hot dogs", Zell's face lit up and a wide, slightly creepy grin spread out across his face. "Awww YEAH! I'll catch up with you later, bro!"

With that, he sprinted past them back towards the stairs. Seifer crossed his arms and shook his head at the martial artist's unnatural obsession with hot dogs. "I don't know how he eats those things all the fuckin' time. It's disgusting."

Rinoa giggled and covered her mouth with her hand. "Neither do I. But I do actually think that they have better hot dogs here than they do at Garden."

"Don't let him hear you say that," Seifer replied, which elicited another giggle from her.

Her laughter faded quickly, throwing them both into an uncomfortable moment of silence. Rinoa prompted Seifer to join her by gesturing to the couches in the sitting area with her head, and they both wandered over to sit down on the plush, inviting piece of furniture.

Seifer reached his arm back, propping it up on the rear of the couch. After pulling his leg up and resting his ankle on his knee, he glanced at Rinoa out of the corner of his eye. She'd lifted her feet out of her flat shoes and tucked them underneath her body, sinking into the couch in obvious comfort. He was somewhat jealous of the fact that pregnant women seemed to be able to do anything they wanted, and people just fawned over them because...they were pregnant.

_I wonder how Quistis would act if she were pregnant. She'd probably still be going on missions and kickin' some serious ass._

_Wait, the fuck?!_

He scrunched up his face as he tried to chase that train of thought away, completely unsure where it even came from in the first place. They'd barely slept together, for Hyne's sake. It's not like he  _wanted_  her to be pregnant.

_Fuck no, I don't!_

As if she sensed his inner turmoil, Rinoa twisted her body around and faced Seifer, though she was still slightly angled away from him. Noticing her movement, he turned his head to the side and stared at her, waiting for her to say something. Normally, when someone faced another person, they were getting ready to speak. He especially knew that to be true with Rinoa—he  _knew_  that face.

It was her 'you  _will_  answer me' face.

Finally, when she spoke, he braced himself for what he expected to be an awkward conversation.

"So...you and Quisty, huh?"

Seifer lowered his eyebrows and asked, "She tell you that?"

Rinoa waved her hands in the air and replied, "No no no, she didn't. You know Quisty. She's hardly the first one to admit personal stuff. I um, I overheard the doctor telling Squall about her condition earlier. She'd mentioned that you were in Quistis' room this  _morning_."

"Yeah, I was assigned to keep an eye on her," Seifer offered as an explanation, though he knew Rinoa wouldn't ever buy that.

True to form, Rinoa raised an eyebrow at him and teased, "Keep an eye on her, huh? Anywhere in particular?"

With a wry smile, he thought,  _Have you_ seen _her legs?_

Contrary to his inner monologue, he rolled his eyes and said, "Just spit it out. I know what you really wanna ask."

Rinoa let out an  _eep_ —she was talking to Selphie  _way_  too much—and faced him head-on. Her hands were clenched tightly in her lap and she bounced in her seat. "Are you guys like,  _together_?"

"Shit, what is this? An interrogation session?" he retorted, though he wasn't actually upset. He laced his fingers together and propped them behind his head, waiting for Rinoa to reply.

"No, I just...if you two  _are_  together, like, together together, then I'm happy for you! Quistis needs someone in her life. I think you guys are perfect for each other," she reassured.

"Perfect, huh?"

It was nice of her to say. Before he'd heard the words come out of Rinoa's mouth, he never would've phrased it quite that way. Sure, he'd all but admitted to Quistis' face that he'd had a thing for her since they were kids but...neither one of them had actually said it in a straightforward manner. Meaning, neither one of them had said, "Hey, I like you."

But  _he_  knew that  _she_  knew how he felt.

Now that his mind was filled with thoughts of Quistis and the whole... _situation_  between them, or whatever the hell it was, he was questioning how she  _really_  felt about him. Obviously she'd given in to him last night, but was that all it was? Was she just... _giving in_  to the heat of the moment? Or deep down, did she actually give a shit about him?

_Fuck, this is what I get for talking to a girl about_ feelings— _does shit to your brain._

Rinoa studied Seifer intently with her little  _doe eyes_  and he nearly groaned aloud at her persistence. Finally, he dropped his hands into his lap and admitted, "We haven't really talked about the uh, 'logistics' of whatever it was that happened between us."

"So you guys  _are_  together!" she exclaimed, bringing her hands together in glee.

"That  _would_  be what you got outta that," Seifer chuckled.

Rinoa reached out and placed her hand on Seifer's forearm, causing her to glance down at the pale, slender fingers that rested on his skin. When he looked up and met her warm, understanding eyes, she smiled at him: a genuine, gentle, equally as warm smile.

"I'm happy for you, Seifer," she said quietly.

Not knowing what to say to that, he nodded in acceptance and that was when the sound of heavy boots thudding on carpet reached them. They both turned sharply to face the owner of said heavy boots, and Squall stood across from them, staring at them with an empty expression.

Rinoa pulled away from Seifer and slipped her feet back into her shoes, rising and shuffling over to her Knight. She placed a soft kiss on Squall's cheek and headed back down the hall; Seifer assumed she was heading back to their room.

Squall watched her walk away and after a moment, he turned back to Seifer. With a quick jerk of his head, he then headed for the conference room.

Seifer rose to his feet with a grunt and followed after the Commander, pulling his phone out and sending a quick text to Zell:  _"Get your ass up here, Chicken-wuss! Sorry, I mean dickwad. Bring the books."_

He chuckled at his own offensive sense of humor and tucked his phone back into his pocket. Once Squall opened the door to the conference room and ambled inside, Seifer trailed after him and plopped down into the seat beside him. The Commander remained standing with his arms crossed as they waited for Zell to arrive.

Finally, a couple of minutes later, the door flew open and Zell crashed into the room, a miniature hot dog dangling out of his mouth. "Schfry, I fvas—" he began, but Squall interrupted him.

"Zell, sit, and finish chewing. Seifer, you can start. What'd you guys find at the condo?"

Seifer adjusted himself in his seat and cleared his throat. "A whole lotta shit," he replied, and glanced over at Zell. "Did you bring the books?"

Zell nodded fervently and reached behind him. He grabbed the books and slid them over to Squall, who caught them easily and lifted up the first book—the history one.

The brunet flipped through it and raised an eyebrow when he noticed that it was a biography of Laguna. " _Why_  am I looking through this?"

Seifer tilted his chin up and instructed, "Page one-hundred and five, or somethin' like that, has a section about Laguna's time in the war. Specifically, the part about the Estharian excavation site."

Squall nodded and flipped to the page Seifer suggested, only to turn back a few pages, then forward a few more. He seemed to have found the right page, because his forehead creased up as he concentrated on reading. After a few minutes, he finished and glanced at both of them, before he pulled the other book over to him.

This time while he read, he narrowed his eyes and clenched his jaw, eventually shutting the book with a thud. With a heavy hand, he placed the book back down on the table and kept his eyes trained on the glazed surface as he inhaled loudly. A second or two later, he glared up at Seifer and demanded, "What is this?"

"Mr. Shooter-Man's dear diary," he replied sarcastically.

"Seifer…" Squall trailed off in a warning.

"Alright, alright. Really though, it's Marcus Bywater's journal, or some shit."

"And he's...Ronan Bywater's son, I'm assuming? That's why you brought the biography, right?" Squall clarified.

Zell piped up then and said, "Yep! Turns out, according to Seifer, Marcus was the guy in the hallway who told him that Marcus had moved. Also, Marcus is the guy who shot you, because he's one and the same."

Squall blinked at Zell, obviously confused at the martial artist's convoluted explanation. Seifer sighed and tried again. "So the guy who originally told Trepe and I that Marcus had moved,  _is_  Marcus. Marcus, aka 'neighbor guy', is also the guy who put that chunk of lead in your shoulder."

"Marcus Bywater, son of Ronan Bywater, shot me?" Squall echoed.

Seifer and Zell nodded in tandem, and Squall continued. "Why?"

"Pres killed Ronan Bywater at the excavation site," Seifer explained.

Squall nodded at that and after a couple of seconds of gazing down at the carpet, he pivoted on his heel and grabbed the file folder from the board's lip. Quickly, he sifted through it and pulled out a specific sheet of paper, slapping it down onto the table once he had it pinched between his fingers.

"The death threat. Read it again," Squall stated.

Seifer pulled it over to him and hastily read over it, his eyes lingering on the line that read,  _"For the crime you committed against my family, I will respond in kind...Now would be a good time to say goodbye to those you love."_

"His dad. Laguna's son—you," Seifer noted as he glanced up at Squall, meeting his gaze.

Zell reached over the table and yanked the death threat out from under Seifer's fingers, scanning it over for the first time. When he made the connection, he jolted in his seat, causing the chair to rock backwards for a brief moment.

"Squall! You!" he shouted.

Seifer and Squall rolled their eyes and Seifer sniped, "Yes, Chicken-wuss. Squall."

"Hey, this is the first time I've read this, okay?" Zell replied defensively.

"What's the game plan, Mr. Leader?" Seifer asked Squall, choosing not to respond to Zell.

Squall crossed his arms and turned his head to the side, deep in thought. After about a minute, he faced them again. "Quistis should be back tomorrow. I want her input on this. For now, our goal is to find out where this guy might've gone. Hunt him down. We're going after him."

Seifer and Zell nodded, rising to their feet and heading for the door like they had this morning. When they were back out in the hallway and passing through the sitting area, Zell piped up and said, "See you tomorrow, then?"

Seifer, who hadn't even paused and just kept walking towards Quistis' room, waved his hand in the air in dismissal. He heard Zell grunt behind him and an amused grin teased at the corner of his lips. Teasing him never got old.

Finally, he came to a stop in front of Quistis' door and rapped his knuckles against it—softly, in case she was sleeping or something. It opened almost immediately and her crystal-clear, pale blue eyes widened in surprise when she saw who it was. "Seifer? You're back already?"

"Yeah. Got lucky with a clue," he baited, wiggling his eyebrows at her.

"A clue?! Get inside," she replied, reaching out and pulling him into the room by the lapels of his jacket.

"If you wanted to hop in between the sheets with me, all you had to do was ask," Seifer teased, shrugging out of his coat.

"That's not why, Seifer," she reprimanded with a roll of her eyes. She padded back over to the bed and sat down on it, patting the spot in front of her as she finished with, "Tell me what you found."

"All you think about is work," he scoffed, though he acquiesced to her request and plopped down onto the bed, stretching out in front of her like a cat on its side. He propped himself up on his elbow and gazed up at her, purposefully biding his time to build the anticipation.

She stared down at him expectantly, and when he still hadn't spoken after a few seconds, she prompted him with an insistent wave of her hand and he chuckled under his breath at her predictable impatience.

When it came to the job, nothing could come between Quistis and her goal.

"Since you asked  _so_  nicely...We found out who the shooter was," he explained.

"You did?! That was fast," she commented.

"Well, like I said, stroke of luck. We went back to Bywater's condo and found a secret door behind a bookshelf—which in and of itself is shady as fuck. Led to a room with a  _ton_  of pictures of Pres, and a few of Squall.

"Turns out, Pres killed Bywater's dad years ago. He wanted revenge and lo and behold, he decided to take a shot at Squall."

"In return for Laguna killing his father?" Quistis clarified.

Seifer grunted in affirmation and Quistis lifted her hand to her face, placing her chin against her knuckles as she mulled over what Seifer had just told her. "So where did Bywater go then? After we failed to catch him?"

With a sigh, he replied, "You  _would_  say it that way. After we 'attempted to apprehend the suspect'...I dunno. Puberty Boy said that's what we gotta find out next, but he wants to wait until you're cleared to return to the land of the living—which is tomorrow, apparently."

Quistis nodded, still obviously deep in thought. Deciding he was done with this particular topic, Seifer reached out and grazed his fingertips along her forearm, causing her eyes to shoot up towards his. She furrowed her eyebrows in a silent question and he pulled her arm closer, planting soft kisses along her skin.

She smiled briefly at the gesture and quietly asked, "Wasn't it just this morning that the doctor reprimanded you for making me do...'strenuous activities'?"

He hummed "mmhm" against her skin, and snaked his tongue out to lightly lick the underside of her wrist. She inhaled a sharp breath and when he glanced up at her reaction, he nearly came undone at the sight that greeted him.

Quistis' cheeks were flushed and her lips were slightly parted as she watched him with sultry, half-lidded eyes. When he repeated the motion, she gasped again and he took that as a yes, climbing to his knees and wrapping his arm around her back, laying her down on top of the bed.

"Seifer...where did this come from?" she whispered.

He stared at her intently for a second before leaning down and nuzzling the side of her neck, breathing in the scent that was uniquely hers. It was fruity, but not overly so. Just feminine enough with a touch of... _something_  else, that kept it from being overwhelming.

_So, this is what Heaven smells like...peaches and...vanilla, or something like that..._

Along her delicate skin, he murmured, "I was gone for like half the day. Didn't you miss me?"

She looped her arms around his neck and ran her fingers through the short strands of his hair. "What would you do if I said I  _didn't_?"

At that, he pulled back and mockingly glared at her with his brows pinched together over his bright eyes. "I'd make sure you  _did_  miss me," he threatened in a low voice.

A seductive smile slowly spread across her face and with a twinkle in her eye, she replied, "In that case...no. I didn't miss you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone who left comments on this story recently :) It always makes my day to get notifications from my readers.
> 
> LaylaEvercrest is on vacay so a new friend of mine, Strings805, has graciously stepped in to beta this chapter in her place. Though as always, thanks to Arenoptara for being my regular go-to beta.
> 
> See you guys next time!


	13. Metastasis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer and Quistis' relationship is beginning to transition into new and unknown territory, and the mission heads in a different direction as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back to Quistis' POV, just FYI. Also, warning for a mild lemon (mild in comparison to chapter ten anyway) right at the beginning. You'll know when. Safe to keep reading when Seifer gets up from the bed, if you don't like lemons.

* * *

_**Metastasis** : a rapid transition, as from one subject to another._

* * *

_Beep, beep, beep, beep…_

Quistis groaned and rolled over, pulling the covers over her face. Maybe if she ignored it, it would just go away.

_Beep, beep, beep, beep…_

A heavy arm swung around and smacked her on the side and she grunted, pinching her eyebrows together.

"Quis...shut the damn thing off," Seifer mumbled.

She groaned again and reached out without opening her eyes, patting her nightstand blindly for her cell phone. When her fingers touched its smooth glass screen, she wrapped her fingers around it and pulled it in front of her face, cracking her right eye open.

The bright glare of the screen blinded her momentarily and she blinked rapidly as she hit 'snooze' on the alarm. With a relieved sigh, she placed it back on the nightstand and rolled over, nuzzling against Seifer's back.

She hadn't been settled for more than a second when he spoke up. "I don't know why you have to wake up so Hyne-damned early," he muttered into his pillow.

Adjusting her cheek against his shoulder blade—muscular men were not as comfortable to cuddle with as people seemed to think—she replied, "Meeting with Squall, remember?"

"...Fuck."

A slight smile teased at the corners of her lips and she closed her eyes again, reveling in the blissful silence of their room. Before she knew it, she'd drifted back off to sleep.

_Beep, beep, beep, beep…_

"For fuck's sake, Quistis!"

"I'm sorry!" she yelped, hastily rolling over and swiping her phone off of the nightstand. She turned off the alarm and sat up in bed, rubbing her eyes to rid them of sleep.

With a sigh, she pulled her glasses on and absentmindedly stared across the room at the tv, taking in the blank screen without realizing she was even looking at it. Eventually, she threw back the covers and traipsed over to the bathroom, flipping on the light once she'd stepped inside.

Once she was in the shower, it was easier for her to start waking up. She cranked up the temperature and when the water was just on the brink of comfortable and slightly too hot, she sighed in content.

By the time she was finished and had stepped out onto the towel she'd thrown onto the ground, she was completely up. The hardest thing about mornings was actually  _waking_  up; Quistis had no problem  _being_  awake once she'd managed to get herself moving and into the shower.

After she dried herself off, she wrapped the towel around her still-dripping hair and trekked back into the bedroom, meandering over to her duffel bag to grab a change of clothes. Her usual peach battle-dress was still being dry-cleaned—since there was a huge splotch of blood on the front—and she had to make-do with more casual clothing. She'd barely straightened and moved to pull on her underwear when Seifer's arms wrapped around her bare waist.

Quistis lowered her arms with a small grin on her face and said, "I'm supposed to be getting ready, you know…"

"I know. I'm helping," he said in a raspy voice.

"How is this helping?" she whispered back.

He hummed and started lightly dragging his palms up and down her lean stomach, causing her lower abdomen to tighten in response. The change in temperature from scalding water, to the cool room air, and now to his warm hands was causing her skin to be overly sensitive.

"Seifer…" She tried to reprimand him, but she realized that she didn't want to turn him away—not really.

"I'll make it quick. Promise," he murmured into her ear, tracing his lips along the outer shell. He reached up and pulled on her towel, causing the wet strands of her hair to fall down around her face.

"Well, if you're promising, then how can I say no?" she asked in a sultry voice.

He'd had his lips against her neck when she'd spoken and she felt them curve upwards in a smile as he dragged her back to bed. After pushing her back onto the mattress, he climbed on top of her and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Without any sort of preamble, he thrust into her and she arched her back, gasping at the sensation.

Seifer groaned in return and leaned down, hooking his arms underneath her and lifting her body up so that he could embrace her, as well as control the speed at which she lowered herself onto him. That didn't sit well with the competitive streak in Quistis, so she wound her arms around his neck and jerked her weight to the side, causing him to fall back down onto the bed.

Once his back was flush against the covers, she swung her leg over his hips and took her time lowering herself back onto him, and his hands flew up and gripped her sides. Inch by torturous inch, she took him inside of her and when she bottomed out, they both let out a long, strained moan.

His fingers tightened around her waist and he lifted her body up, pulling her crashing back down immediately afterwards. She gasped at the sharp pulse of pleasure in her abdomen and rocked against him, rubbing her clit on the spot above where they were joined. She sucked in a sharp inhale and continued to rock against him every time he pulled out and thrust up into her.

A few minutes later, his thrusts became more frantic and she couldn't keep up with his frenzied pace. Frustrated that he would probably reach his peak before she would, she whimpered slightly and he reached up, placing his thumb against her clit.

As if he'd read her thoughts, in a strained voice, he reassured, "I wouldn't do that to ya, Quis."

She reached around and grabbed his wrist, encouraging him, and he planted his hand against her back so she'd remain balanced. The more he thrust, the more he circled his thumb and before she knew it, the tension that had wound so tightly within her snapped and she cried out, squeezing her eyes shut as she rode the waves of pleasure that overtook her.

Unsure of whether it was seconds or minutes that had passed, she slowly opened her eyes again once she'd come down from her high and met Seifer's hooded gaze. He was running his hands up and down her sides—so lightly that it almost tickled. When he saw that she'd recovered, he pulled her off of him but she remained poised above his body.

With a teasing smile, she said, "If we're late, I'm going to kill you."

"Woooow, are you seriously complaining right now?" he threw back at her with a grin as he rolled out from under her and off the bed.

"Only a little bit, but it is a valid concern," she replied defensively, resting the backs of her thighs on her calves.

"Yeah, to  _you_  maybe. I thought that was worth it," he retorted, making his way into the bathroom.

When he disappeared from view, she let out a small laugh and climbed off the bed, padding back over to her duffel bag. Quickly, she finished getting dressed and wandered into the bathroom.

She heard him start up the shower as she fought to get the knots out of her hair. Having fine hair meant that a slight tangle could easily turn into a bird's nest, so she had to carefully maneuver her way through the snags. Once she could run the comb through the strands with ease, she grabbed the hair-dryer and ran the concentrated gust of warm air over her hair until it was only slightly damp.

Seifer pulled back the shower curtain as she reached behind her and grabbed the ends of her golden hair. She twisted them together and flipping them upwards as she pinned them in place with her usual clip.

"You're fast," he commented.

"No, I'm late," she rebutted.

"Whatever, who cares? It's just Puberty Boy," he mocked, wrapping a towel around his slim waist.

In the mirror, she couldn't help raking her eyes over the ripples of his muscular abdomen and cleared her throat. "Regardless of the fact that it's Squall, I  _hate_  being late. You should know that by now."

He scoffed and stood there, watching her with his hands on his hips. "You know it's gonna take me at least another fifteen minutes to get ready, right?"

She let out an exasperated sigh. "I can't wait that long, Seifer. I'll just meet you in the conference room."

"It's  _fifteen minutes_ , Quistis!" he exclaimed with a roll of his eyes.

"Yes, fifteen minutes beyond how late I already am," she informed him in a stern voice, whirling around and mirroring his posture.

He shook his head in disbelief and teased, "Only you would say that fifteen minutes is 'late'. That's normal for the rest of us. Why are you in such a damn hurry, anyway? You got a problem with showin' up together?"

His words made her pause and she averted her gaze, hoping he wouldn't catch on. She wasn't sure how to answer his question without giving anything away. When she didn't respond right away, Seifer frowned and muttered, "Wait. Are you fuckin' serious?"

Feigning ignorance, she sputtered and replied, "That's not it at all. Why would you think that?"

"Because you're practically running out the door," he accused.

"That's ridiculous, Seifer," she said, traipsing out of the bathroom. She passed the main door and grabbed her boots from where she'd left them by the wall, placing her feet in them and pulling the zippers up.

Truthfully, as sad as it was for her to admit, he was right: she  _was_  trying to avoid having them arrive at the meeting together.

Though they'd been nearly inseparable since she'd woken up from her surgery a few days ago, those were private moments and nearly all of them—if not all of them—had occurred behind closed doors. Appearing together, at the same time nonetheless, to a  _work meeting_ , would imply that the dynamic between them had changed; she wasn't naive, she knew that it had. She just didn't know whether that was something that she was ready to admit to all of their friends.

Well, her friends. For him, they had just been people he grew up with due to happenstance. Or, they  _had_  been that. Now, what he considered them, and they him, was ambiguous at best.

It wasn't that she didn't care about him, because she did. She just wasn't sure exactly how. Did she want the best for him? Of course she did. In addition to everything that had happened between them the past few days, he was a part of their original group—despite what had happened during the war—and she'd always care about his well-being. Was that it though? Was that  _all_  she felt for him?

If he were to be as severely injured as she was, how would she feel? What would go through her mind? If he were to take off tomorrow and she never saw him again, what then? If he were to  _die_ , Hyne-forbid, would she be devastated? Would she recover?  _Ever_?

It was the answers to those types of questions that she didn't feel ready to confront yet, and that was why she didn't want them to head to the meeting together. Again, she wasn't naive. She knew that eventually, that talk would come up between them and she'd have no choice but to face it head-on.

Just not today.

He'd followed her out of the bathroom, still clad in nothing but a white towel, and accused, "Really? Because that's what this sure as hell looks like."

"I'm not 'rushing out of here' because of that! I just don't want to be late," she protested as she straightened and glanced over her shoulder at him.

With a sigh, she finally faced him again. Walking up to him, she placed her hand on his cheek and he leaned away from her touch. She lowered her hand to her side again and said, "Seifer, I just don't...Can we please not deal with this today?"

"You have a really bad fuckin' habit of referring to stuff that has to do with me as 'dealing with it'," he spat.

"I-I do not!"

"What-fucking-ever, Trepe. Just go if you're gonna go," Seifer replied from between clenched teeth. He broke eye contact and walked away, farther into the room.

When she heard him say 'Trepe', her heart dropped into her stomach. He must've been far more upset than she'd originally thought if he'd resorted to his defensive mechanism of referring to her by her last name.

"Why do you do that?" she asked quietly as she watched him drop the towel. Normally, she'd admire the view but at this particular moment in time, the tension between them made things awkward and she felt like she'd be violating him somehow by doing that.

"Do what?" he asked vehemently, refusing to turn around and face her again as he pulled on his boxers.

"Call me Trepe. You haven't done that lately."

"You know what, I'm gonna pull a you and say I don't wanna fuckin' talk about it right now. Didn't I say to go if you wanted to go so badly?" He yanked a plain black shirt over his head and pulled it down roughly.

"Seifer…" Quistis trailed off.

"Go!" he shouted, whirling around and throwing an intense glare her way.

She knitted her eyebrows and spun on her heel, pulling the door open a little harder than she'd intended to, and it slammed against the wall as she stepped out into the hall. She didn't bother to close it behind her and stalked towards the conference room on the other end of the Palace. When she was passing by the seating area across from the hallway that led back towards the main lobby, she heard a loud thud behind her and clenched her jaw when she realized that Seifer had slammed the door shut.

By the time she got to the conference room, she was practically stomping and had to pause in front of the door to compose herself. She took a few deep breaths and wrapped her fingers around the doorknob, letting out a long exhale as she twisted it open. Bright sunlight streamed into the room from the wide windows, causing the air to feel stifling. Apparently, whoever had used the room last hadn't bothered to shut the blinds. She blinked rapidly to allow her eyes to adjust to the sudden change and eventually, her gaze landed on Squall, who was standing in front of the whiteboard to her right.

She cleared her throat and greeted him with, "Good morning, Squall," as she wandered into the room and beelined for the coffee machine.

He watched in silence as she poured herself a mug. She opted for completely black coffee this morning—Hyne knew she needed it after that little spiff. Afterwards, she faced Squall again and leaned against the portable island that the coffee machine rested on.

They stared at each other for a few seconds before Squall let out a small, almost nonexistent chuckle and said, "It's good to see you back on your feet."

She smiled—despite her inner turmoil—and replied, "It's good to  _be_  back. Another day cooped up in my room and I might've gone insane."

"I'm right there with you," he agreed, crossing his arms over his chest.

She laughed under her breath and wrapped her other hand around the coffee mug, staring into the dark depths of the magical liquid. After a few seconds, Squall asked, "Where are Zell and Seifer?"

Trying to maintain a neutral expression, she cleared her throat again and said, "I'm not sure. I didn't pass either of them in the hall."

He grunted and rested his hands on the back of the chair in front of him, leaning his weight against it. "They'd better hurry. The more time we waste, the farther Bywater gets."

"I'm sure they'll be here soon. We are about ten minutes early, after all."

He let out another grunt and turned towards her, holding her gaze. After studying her for a little bit, he asked, "So how  _are_ you feeling?"

"Is that concern I detect in your voice, Commander?" she teased.

That earned her an eye roll and he mumbled, "Whatever."

She let out an actual laugh and replied, "I'm fine. I'm a little sore, but I'm closer to feeling normal than I was two days ago. What about you?"

"About the same. I didn't require surgery though, so I'd suspect I'm a little better off than you were," he explained, rolling his shoulder around as if he were testing that theory.

"No surgery is good," she commented, to which he nodded in agreement.

The door opened then and Zell barrelled into the room, throwing out a chipper, "Mornin' guys!"

Quistis raised her coffee mug in greeting and Squall nodded, gesturing to the seat on his right. Zell acquiesced and flopped down into the chair, causing a puff of air to whoosh out of the leather seat. He leaned back, kicking his leg up on his other knee and noted, "Seifer still not here yet?"

She trailed over to the chair in front of her—the one on Squall's left—and pulled it out, sinking down into it in a much more refined manner than Zell had. "I doubt he's much of a morning person. He'll probably waltz in ten minutes after we start."

Squall scoffed and said, "Sounds about right. Should we just get started then?"

"I don't see why not," she replied, setting her mug down on the table.

Seifer had never been one for caring about the details anyway, so she doubted he'd be irked that they'd started without him.

Squall threw a file folder in front of both of them. "Most of that stuff you two have already seen. I updated the file with the information that Zell and Seifer found yesterday, Quistis, if you want to catch up."

She nodded and opened the file, scanning through the new sheets of paper on top. Meanwhile, Squall gestured to the board behind him. "We now know that Marcus Bywater is the son of Ronan Bywater, a former Estharian soldier that became collateral damage when President Laguna and his squad stumbled upon the excavation site. According to the journal that Seifer found, he'd originally targeted Laguna for revenge, but switched his target to me when he found out that we'd be present during Adel Memorial Week. An eye for an eye, so to speak."

The door to the conference room opened again and Seifer stepped in, shutting the door rather loudly behind him. Everyone glanced up at him and Quistis was the first to look away, fixing her gaze back on the file in front of her. Once Seifer had pulled out the seat beside her and sat down, Squall continued.

"Quistis, after you and Seifer caught up to him, did you manage to see which way he went?"

Quistis shook her head in denial and replied, "I ordered Seifer to follow after him, but he ended up returning not long after."

"Yeah, you were fuckin' bleeding out," Seifer retorted.

Quistis clenched her jaw at his defensive tone of voice; he was obviously still angry. "Yes, I am well aware of my condition at that time. I was simply explaining to Squall that I wasn't able to see which way Marcus went, because I wasn't there."

"Right. I'm sure that's what you were doing," Seifer replied, his tone ice cold.

From across the table, Zell's gaze flitted from Quistis to Seifer, and back, before he raised an eyebrow. "Uh…" he trailed off.

Squall sighed and looked at Seifer. "Fine. Did  _you_  see which way he went?"

Seifer propped his elbow up on the table and rested his chin in his hand. "I followed him all the way to the other end of the block, behind the Airstation. He hopped onto a motorcycle and that's when I ran back to Trepe's location. From what I could see he was headin' east, but he could've easily changed his mind."

The Commander straightened and crossed his arms again, looking away as he fell into deep thought. They all gave him a moment to form a plan. By this point, they knew him well enough to know that once he was finished, he'd share with the group.

Sometimes, it was best to let Squall be Squall.

After a couple of minutes, he faced them again. "Well, that's better than nothing. At least we have some sort of lead on him. Seifer, Quistis, I want you guys to check with Kiros or Ward about looking at camera footage. I'm sure Esthar has a system set up where we can try to find Marcus and track his route; he probably left the city.

"Zell, you're one of the best with technology. Use Esthar's mainframe to find out as much as you possibly can about Marcus, now that we know a little bit of his background. See if he has any other residences outside of Esthar; see if you can get a bit more on his previous jobs, his experience—anything and everything."

The three of them nodded and Squall started heading towards the door. When he'd pulled it open, he turned back and instructed, "We'll reconvene tonight."

The door clicked shut behind him and Quistis pushed her chair back, standing up to stretch. She winced at the slight pull of the new skin over her wound. Zell saw her rubbing her abdomen and asked, "You sure you're ready to come back, Quisty?"

She glanced up at the martial artist and waved her hand in the air. "I can't stay in my room for another minute, Zell."

Zell nodded, and he and Seifer rose to their feet as well. Seifer placed his hands on his hips and said. "Before we get to it, I'm starving. Let's get food first."

"Where did you wanna go?" Zell piped up.

Seifer stared at Zell for a second before he quipped, "Did you hear me invite you?"

Zell's mouth dropped open and he sat there in confusion for a few seconds until Seifer guffawed and added, "I'm just kidding, shit. Let's go then."

The two men headed for the door and Quistis shook her head, holding her hand out. "Wait. I don't want to head out too far from the Palace. Especially since we have to come back here anyway."

Zell dropped his arms and hunched over at the waist. "Oh come on, Quisty! You're the one who's been cooped up here for the past few days; let's get out! Go somewhere! I want breakfast food!"

"I don't like breakfast food," Seifer commented.

Zell faced Seifer, his mouth open in astonishment. "Dude, who doesn't like breakfast food? Bacon and eggs are like, the  _best_."

After discussing back and forth on the best course of action, Quistis managed to convince them that staying at the Palace and ordering from the kitchens was a solid plan. Considering the tasks from Squall were all carried out at the Palace, it made no sense to her to leave, only to come right back. All things considered, it seemed like a waste of time, in her opinion.

It took about fifteen minutes for their food to get up to the conference room—"Quisty, you got me bacon and eggs, right?!"—and for the most part, they ate in silence. Seifer didn't voluntarily say anything to her, and in return, she didn't go out of her way to say anything to him. Zell must've picked up on the awkward signals because halfway through the meal, he started staring intently at the two of them.

Seifer frown intensified and he pointed at Zell with his fork. "The hell you starin' at?"

Zell picked his fork back up and shrugged nonchalantly. "Nothing. You guys are just acting kinda weird today."

"How so?" Quistis pressed, her eyebrows pinched together. The fact that Zell was able to pick up on the tension between them unnerved her—especially since he'd done so rather easily. She doubted Seifer would care if the group found out about them;  _she_  was the one who didn't know whether she wanted to tell anyone just yet. Mostly though, that stemmed from the fact that she  _still_  wasn't sure how to label them.

The martial artist set his silverware down again and crossed his arms, leaning back in the chair. After he tilted his head upwards, seemingly lost in thought, he said, "Well...usually you guys are kind of...you bicker a lot, you know? Ever since we started eating, you've been super quiet—which isn't like you guys. Plus there was that weird tension earlier—"

Seifer scoffed, interrupting Zell, and Quistis resisted the urge to glare at him. Instead, she met Zell's gaze and in a monotone voice, replied, "Oh, really? I guess I've never noticed before."

To that, Seifer snorted. He seemed hellbent on acting like a petulant child and Quistis groaned inwardly. If that's what she had to put up with for the rest of the day, she didn't know if she'd make it until sundown.

After all, he always had been the best at pushing her buttons.

Once they were finished eating, they trekked out into the hall and went their separate ways: Zell headed for the control room down in the basement, and Quistis and Seifer headed down the hall towards Laguna's office to find Kiros and Ward.

The President's office was difficult to miss. A unique set of double doors marked the entrance: frosted blue glass that mirrored the lobby's floors were set inside of dark mahogany wood, framed by golden detailing that traced around the opaque panes. They paused in front of the doors and Seifer raised his fist, rapping his knuckles against the glass in rapid succession.

From within the office, Laguna's ever-cheerful voice called out to them. "Cooome on in!"

Seifer rolled his eyes and turned the door knob, striding into the office with assertive purpose. Quistis trailed after him and glanced around the room at the extravagant surroundings. A guy like Laguna, who was perpetually in casual mode, seemed incredibly out of place in such an opulent room.

The floor was adorned with extremely plush carpet and directly in the center of the space, in front of Laguna's desk, rested the Estharian crest in all of its multi-colored, vibrant glory. The walls were covered in the highest quality wallpaper that was a pale blue, with pearly-white stripes running vertically along the length of the wall. A wide, spotless window loomed behind the President, offering what was probably the best view of Esthar to the room's inhabitants. Beside the desk, on either side of Laguna, stood Kiros and Ward.

When Seifer and Quistis stood directly in front of the desk, Laguna rose and Quistis firmly saluted the President, while Seifer nodded in his direction.

As per usual, Laguna offered a jovial wave and a cheerful smile. "Hey guys! What can I do for ya?"

Quistis continued to stand at attention, though she dropped her salute. "We were actually looking for Kiros and Ward, President Loire."

"Quistis…" Laguna reprimanded softly, which caused the blue mage to sigh under her breath.

"Sorry... _Laguna_ , we were looking for Kiros and Ward," she amended.

Kiros piped up and asked, "Whatever for?"

This time, Seifer responded. "We need to look at camera footage for the city. Tryin' to hunt down Bywater's exit route to see if we can pinpoint where he went after the shooting."

Understanding lit up Kiros' face and he said, "Ah, that makes perfect sense. Come with me," before walking past them towards the door.

Quistis saluted Laguna again while Seifer followed after Kiros, and as they were on their way out of the office, Laguna called out, "See you later, Quistis!"

She threw a smile over her shoulder towards the President and Ward waved goodbye as the doors shut behind her. Seifer and Kiros were a ways ahead so she sped up a bit in order to catch up to them. Kiros hung a left once they'd reached the main sitting area and headed towards the lobby.

Confused, Quistis questioned, "Kiros, where  _is_ the security wing?"

As they descended the steps, he replied, "It's actually not connected to the main Palace. We have to head out into the Plaza and through a side door to get to it."

Seifer raised an eyebrow and asked, "There a reason for that?"

"Only that Adel was extremely paranoid. During her reign is when the security wing was installed, and though she demanded that they keep a close eye on the citizens, she didn't trust them enough to have them that near in proximity to where she resided."

"Crazy bitch," Seifer muttered, to which Kiros replied, "Indeed."

They crossed the Plaza diagonally and approached a small, two-story, non-descript building. Instead of heading to the front door, Kiros rounded the corner to the side of the building and stepped up to an industrial-looking steel door that was set into the brick wall. He punched in a four-number code into the door's keypad and after it let out a beep, it bounced open, allowing the trio to head inside.

A guard directly inside the door faced them and when he recognized Kiros, he bowed at the waist. "Vice President Seagill."

Kiros nodded in return and gestured to Quistis and Seifer behind him. "Greetings, Johnson. This is Seifer Almasy and SeeD Quistis Trepe. They're here to inspect the security footage for the city."

Johnson inclined his head in their direction and Kiros turned around, facing the duo head-on. "I'm going to head back to the Palace now but if you have any questions, have Johnson contact me."

Quistis nodded. "Thank you, Kiros."

The Vice President headed back out to the Plaza and after she turned back around, Johnson waved them over to the small staircase at the far end of the room.

As they ascended, Quistis stared at the back of Seifer's coat, her eyebrows slightly furrowed. Since their little spat this morning, he'd spoken a grand total of maybe twenty words to her, which like Zell had said, was highly unlike the blond gunbladist. Usually he sniped sarcastic remarks at her, or teased her relentlessly about trivial things. Surprisingly, she found that she kind of missed his jabs; anything was better than this uncharacteristic silent treatment.

_Is he honestly going to ignore me the entire day? This is the exact reason I was hesitant to say anything to the group…_ she thought with a huff.

They reached the next landing and Johnson wandered down the hall, coming to a stop in front of the second door on their right. He gestured to the interior of the room through the open doorway and explained, "This is the camera room. You can use the console to go back through the footage to whenever you need. If you get confused, I'll be outside."

Johnson turned and headed back over to the staircase and Seifer flipped on the light switch as he walked into the room. Quistis trailed in after him and shut the door, making her way over to the console and sinking down into the chair beside Seifer. A weird sense of deja vu swept over her and she realized that it had been less than a week since they'd flown to Esthar on the Ragnarok, in a setting much like this one.

_Could that much have changed between us in less than seven days?_

Seifer reached up and switched on the console, and the buzzing hum of the electronic panel coming to life filled the room. Now, instead of empty silence, they had white noise. Quistis crossed her arms over her body as she waited for him to find the right footage, grasping her elbows within her palms.

He typed a few things into the control keyboard, and the footage dated the night of the events popped up onto the screen. A couple clicks of the mouse later, he'd switched through the cameras until he settled on the one that rested outside of the Airstation. With a neutral expression, he turned to Quistis and asked, "Ready?"

She nodded and he pressed play; the black and white video showed various Estharian citizens walking past the Airstation, and Quistis glanced at the time-stamp. She pointed at it and instructed, "It's too early. Go forward a little bit."

Seifer grunted and pressed a button on the console, causing the video to zoom ahead until it hit early evening. Quistis held up her hand and said, "Okay, stop. You should be showing up in about an hour."

"You don't seriously want to sit through an hour of people walkin' by, do you?"

"...No, I guess not. Fast-forward again," she said, and the video zoomed ahead until the view darkened, implying that the sun had set in the footage. Seifer let off of the button and the time-stamp now showed that it was just before the fireworks had begun.

He kicked back in his seat, resting his ankle on the opposite knee and bracing his hands behind his head. With him rocking back and forth and her staring intently at the screen, they sat there in silence for about ten minutes, when Marcus' figure raced across the camera's viewpoint.

"There he is...which means I'm about to show up in a few seconds," Seifer noted.

"Thanks for the commentary," she quipped.

"You're fuckin' welcome," he replied, though his profanity lacked its usual fire. In fact, he sounded sarcastically chipper, which ended up irritating Quistis even more than if he'd just cursed with conviction.

In the hopes of being the bigger person, Quistis opted for silence and continued to watch the footage. True to what he'd said, a couple of seconds later, Seifer came into view, sprinting after Marcus.

It was slightly disorienting watching the same events play out from a different angle than she'd originally witnessed. On the screen, she saw Seifer tackle Marcus and they exchanged blows. Not long after, she saw herself join in the fray.

"You can skip this too, since we know how it ends. Jump to the side camera that shows the street behind the Airstation," she instructed.

"'Cause you call all the shots, right? Since you're on point?" Seifer spat.

Surprised by his sudden anger, she whirled around. " _What_? If you're referring to the mission then  _yes_ , I do."

He turned and met her gaze. "What else would I be talkin' about?" he deadpanned.

"Don't," Quistis threatened, her voice low.

"Don't what?" he needled.

"This! Don't pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about! You're blowing this entire thing out of proportion!"

"Yeah, okay. You're just too damn embarrassed to admit it," he rebutted.

"There's nothing to admit," she huffed indignantly, turning back to the screen.

Unfortunately, now that Seifer was riled up, it didn't seem like he was going to drop it. "Come on! Don't be a pussy, Trepe. Even if you  _are_ embarrassed to admit it to your little orphanage friends, at least have the balls to say it to my face instead of leading me on."

Quistis clenched her jaw and refused to respond to his bait. On the screen, Seifer chased Marcus down the side alley and Marcus hopped onto a waiting motorcycle, like Seifer had recounted this morning. He started up the bike and sped off-screen, at which point, she saw Seifer about-face and run back in the opposite direction.

"This doesn't give us  _any_  leads," she mumbled, frustrated at both the lack of direction the footage offered as well as Seifer's attitude.

"Un-fucking-believable," he muttered.

The tone of his voice rubbed her the wrong way and she balled her hands into tight fists as she whirled around to face him. " _Now_  what?" she asked from between clenched teeth.

"Is this seriously all that's important to you? Is this all you care about in your sad little life?" he spat.

Quistis' mouth fell open in shock at his animosity. "Ex _cuse_  me?"

"Your fuckin'  _job_! I'm trying to have a discussion with you about shit that's actually important and you keep focusing on your Hyne-damned work!" he shouted, throwing his hands up in her face.

She leaned away from his frantic gestures and reprimanded, "Because we are on a  _mission_ , Seifer. This is our job, regardless of what you might think about it. We didn't come here to discuss the dynamics of whatever might be between us."

" _Might be_? For the love of Hyne, Quistis. Sounds like you just want to sweep me under the fucking rug. Like I'm some Hyne-damned stray animal you took in out of pity, or some shit. I knew you were cold-hearted but this is beyond any expectation I might've had," he retorted, breaking eye contact and looking away at the wall.

Confused and hurt by his words, Quistis opened her mouth to respond but closed it immediately after. At Garden, cadets had jokingly referred to her as the 'Ice Queen'. Over time, the nickname began to have a rather negative connotation in her mind. It implied that she was unattainable, unapproachable...an automaton who simply followed the routine that Garden dictated. She had always hoped that someone would see past that persona and realize that she was a woman; a woman who, like everyone else, has wants, needs, desires, and dreams.

After opening herself up and allowing Seifer to see the vulnerable sides of her, it hurt to hear  _him_  say it.

Tears pooled in her eyes and her throat tightened as she quietly replied. " _I_ don't even know what we are, Seifer. How could I possibly tell my friends if I don't even know what this is between us. But I'm sorry, Seifer. I'm sorry that I failed to meet  _your_  expectations."

In truth, that was only partially the reason. On the one hand, Quistis  _didn't_  know where they stood; neither one of them had been willing to broach the subject about "what" they were. It seemed juvenile to say they were dating or that he was her "boyfriend", and somewhere not so deep down inside, she was terrified that if she did ask, Seifer would run. She was so afraid that he would tell her it was only a fling and that by bringing it up, it would imply to him that she wanted something more.

Men tended to disappear once the topic of long-term commitment came up. To back that up with sound evidence, she rarely ever put herself out there and the few times that she had, she'd been rejected. If  _Seifer_ rejected her...she wasn't sure if she'd be able to handle it. The voice at the back of her mind told her that that, in and of itself, implied that her feelings had moved beyond a simple fling. But her fear of rejection was far more prominent than that knowledge.

So she figured it was better to not ask.

They stood there, chests heaving as they stared each other down. Eventually, when Seifer spoke, his voice was low, almost impossible to hear. If Quistis didn't know any better, she might've thought that he sounded hurt.

"Damn it, Quistis. Do I really need to spell it out for you? Do you honestly not have a single fuckin' clue?"

He stared at her, waiting for her response, his gaze so intense and bright that she felt like he could stare into her soul. What frightened her the most about the ferocity of his stare, was that he could either rip her to pieces or lift her up higher than she'd ever been. This bizarre and unfamiliar control that he had over her emotions unnerved her.

Before she could respond, the chipper tone of his phone ringing interrupted them and broke the tension in the air. She glanced away, trying to regain her composure as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone.

After tapping the screen, he held the phone up to his ear. "What?" he snapped in lieu of a more polite greeting, the muscle in his jaw twitching.

She couldn't hear the voice on the other end well enough to tell who it was, but the muffled response of the caller reached her ears and she thought it sounded male. After a couple of seconds, Seifer replied, "You sure about that?"

More mumbling ensued and he nodded, hanging up on the caller and stuffing his phone back into his pocket. Swiftly, he turned on his heel and headed for the door, leaving behind an incredibly confused and vulnerable Quistis.

"Seifer, what's going on?" she called out to him.

He turned the knob and pushed open the door, glancing over his shoulder at her. "We're leaving."

She rushed after him and grabbed onto his coat, pulling him back. "Why? Who was that?"

"Apparently, Zell found info on Marcus in the mainframe. Says he had another residence elsewhere, so we're heading there in a few after he updates Mr. Leader," he explained, pulling his arm out of her grasp and trekking over to the stairs.

As they descended and reached the bottom floor, he made his way to the exit, always one step ahead of her. Frustrated, she grabbed his arm and pulled harder this time, commanding, "Seifer, wait. You have to keep me informed. Where are we going?"

Finally, he turned around and stared down at her, his expression tense, his eyes cold and distanced.

"Looks like we're stuck with each other a little longer, Trepe. We're heading to Deling."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hooray! An update! Many thanks to Strings805 and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading for me. The things Layla does with arguments and tension though...so great!
> 
> See you guys next time!


	14. Adamo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang arrive in Deling City and Quistis receives a birthday surprise.

* * *

_**Adamo:** to fall in love with; to find pleasure in_

* * *

Even with the Ragnarok's high speeds, the flight from Esthar to Deling was estimated to be just under six hours. That meant six hours on the ship with Seifer, spent in silence.

Quistis was not excited.

For once in her life—and likely the  _only_  time in her life—she found herself wishing that Selphie was the one piloting the Ragnarok, instead of Squall. Somehow, the upbeat brunette always managed to shave off an hour or so of travel time. Most of the time, Quistis didn't want to think about  _how_  she managed to do that, or exactly what speeds they had to travel at in order to make that happen, but it was something she would've appreciated today.

For the third time since they'd taken off, she glanced out of the corner of her eye at Seifer, who was reading on the other side of the passenger cabin. He'd said no more than ten words to her since they'd met up that morning for breakfast, and chose to sit across the aisle from her rather than beside her. Silence from Seifer made her more uncomfortable than when he was shouting in her face, and the tension in the air was far more unsettling than when she'd found herself standing across from him during the war with her whip in hand, ready to strike him down.

Out of her peripheral vision, she saw Seifer shift in his seat, switching which leg was crossed over the other. He cleared his throat and that was when she twisted in her seat so that she could finally face him head-on.

Deciding that it was now or never, Quistis broke the silence in the room. "Seifer?"

He placed his finger on the page and looked up, meeting her gaze. "What?"

"Are you going to ignore me the entire way to Deling?"

"I'm reading," he replied, looking back down at his book. It was a clear dismissal and Quistis narrowed her eyes at him, irritated.

"I've never once seen you read," she commented.

An irritated sigh escaped him and he glared up at her. "What's with people thinkin' I can't read? I'm not fuckin' illiterate, you know."

"I didn't say you were  _illiterate_. I was just saying that I've never seen you read for pleasure before."

"Yeah, well...six hours is a long ass time." He went back to reading his book, even making it a point to angle his body away from her.

Quistis looked down at her hands and picked at her nail for a minute or so, before she asked, "Is this how it's going to be the whole time?"

"Is this how what's gonna be?" he asked without looking at her.

"Never mind. Read your damn book," she spat, facing forward again as she crossed her arms and legs. She was fed up with his attitude and if he wanted to ignore her, then fine. She'd gladly acquiesce.

"Wow, someone's feeling feisty today. Look at you, swearin' like an adult and all," he said.

Instead of responding, Quistis clenched her jaw and stared at the headrest of the seat in front of her. Silence settled in again and she tapped her fingers against the backside of her bicep, suddenly feeling impatient and holed up. With a sharp exhale, she rose from her seat and stalked towards the door.

As she was about to step over the threshold into the hallway, Seifer called out to her, "Where you goin'?"

"Wherever you're not," she sniped, and the doors slid shut behind her.

She placed her hands on her hips and sighed, trying to collect herself before she saw anyone else and snapped at them, too. There was just something about Seifer that had always set her off and now that they were...whatever they were, it was almost as if he irritated her  _more_  than he had before.

After she took a few deep breaths, she glanced to her left and stared at the elevator.  _Maybe I'll go find Rinoa or Zell._

She knew Rinoa would be anywhere Squall was, especially since she was just shy of six months pregnant. But Zell? He could be anywhere on the ship.

With a new goal in mind, she stepped up onto the elevator, her arms hanging loosely at her sides as she rode up to the cockpit. Zell hadn't been in the passenger cabin with them—likely because he hadn't wanted to be in a room with Seifer for too long, even if Quistis was also there—so she figured she'd see if the martial artist was with Squall and Rinoa. If he wasn't, it would probably take her nearly an hour to search the entire ship and at least that would leave her with only four hours left until they reached Deling, instead of five.

Once the elevator reached the top, the reflective red doors ahead of her slid open, revealing the oval cockpit. The wide, clear windshield of the ship offered an unobstructed view of the landscape as it flew below them. Quistis had to admit that she could see why Selphie loved flying so much. It was freeing and calming; there was nothing, and no one else up there but them.

In front of her, she could see the top of Squall's head over the pilot seat's headrest—well, it was more so the feathered ends of his chestnut-colored hair. Beside him stood Rinoa, who had her arm resting on the back of the seat as she stared out at the incredible view. To her right, in one of the two co-pilot seats, was Zell. He had his eyes closed, hands resting behind his head.

"There you are," Quistis greeted.

His bright blue eyes popped open and the edge of his tattoo wrinkled up when he grinned. "Heya Quisty! I thought you were downstairs with Seifer?"

She crossed her arms and replied, "I  _was_. He started driving me insane so I thought I'd come up and see how things were going up here."

At that, Rinoa turned around and Quistis glanced up at her. When their eyes met, the sorceress smiled and quipped, "Well, we haven't crashed yet, so I guess things are going well."

Something akin to a snort came from Squall, and without turning, he said, "I'm mildly offended that you thought we'd have the slightest chance of crashing. Considering we trust  _Selphie_ —of all people—to pilot this thing, I'd like to think I could at least keep us in the air."

Rinoa rolled her eyes and lightly smacked Squall on the arm. "Yeah, yeah, concentrate on flying, mister!"

"You shouldn't hit the pilot," Squall deadpanned.

Rinoa waved her hand in the air dismissively and wandered over to stand in front of Quistis. "So Seifer's driving you crazy, huh? What's he doing?"

Quistis sighed and placed her hands on her hips. "He's just...being Seifer. Nothing new."

Rinoa patted Quistis' arm and drew her lips into a thin line, which Quistis figured her friend meant as a consoling grimace. How a grimace could be consoling, Quistis didn't exactly know, but leave it to Rinoa to somehow make it work.

The younger woman offered, "You could stay up here with us for a little while, then? There's an extra seat!"

At the suggestion, Quistis made her way over to the chair opposite Zell and plopped down into it, her knees rocking upwards with the sudden motion. "Sounds good to me. If I had to spend another second with him, I might've gone crazy."

Rinoa strode over to the chair beside Squall and, after sinking down into it, spun it around so she could face Quistis. "Yikes, that bad, huh?"

Before Quistis could answer, Zell interrupted the girls' conversation and pleaded, "Come on, you two. No 'girl talk' while we're around! It's seriously a bore. Right, Squall?"

A noncommittal grunt came from the other side of the pilot's seat and Zell frowned before muttering, "Thanks for the support, man."

Rinoa threw up her hands. "What  _else_  are we supposed to do for four hours, you guys? Besides, it was important, right Quistis?"

Quistis shrugged and responded, "Not particularly. I'm not sure if I really want to talk about it right now, either."

Zell straightened in his chair and suggested, "I brought my Triple Triad deck! We could play that for a bit!"

Quistis opened her mouth to shoot down the idea, but instead of saying no, closed it. Why  _not_  play? When was the last time she let herself go and spend some time with her friends? Goofing off and having fun?

"Sure. Why not?" she told Zell with a smile.

* * *

**Two and a half hours later.**

"Aw come on, Quisty! You've won almost every single game!" Zell shouted.

"No need to yell, Zell. You just need to work on your strategy," Quistis advised as she collected the cards off of the playing mat.

"You're pretty much impossible to beat! I've tried everything," the martial artist protested.

"Everything other than strategy," Squall ragged.

"You come beat her then, Squall!" Zell goaded.

"Fine," the commander stated, pressing the autopilot button on the ship's dash.

Fifteen minutes later, Squall tossed down his final card, flipping over Quistis' two remaining cards. The former instructor let out a surprised gasp and glanced up at her usually stoic friend, who had a wide grin on his face. "Rin  _did_  tell you that no one's been able to beat me."

"Unbelievable. You're the first person who's managed to defeat me in six months," Quistis confessed, her mouth hanging slightly open in shock.

Squall let out a quiet, satisfied chuckle. Quistis started shuffling her cards again and stated, "One more time."

"You sure you want to go through that again?" Squall asked.

With fire in her eyes, Quistis glared up at him. "I'm  _positive._ "

This time, almost twenty minutes later, it was Quistis who threw down her last card with a triumphant grin on her face. "Take  _that_ , Commander."

He sat there in silence with his arms crossed, until the frown on his face curled upwards into a small smile. "Well, if anyone was going to beat me at this, it was going to be you, Quistis. Good game."

"Thank you, Squall." With a smile on her face, Quistis gathered the cards and placed them in a neat stack before handing them over to Zell.

"Way to go, Quisty!" Zell cheered.

Quistis laughed and shook her head at his antics. "Thanks, Zell. I'm going to head back down, now. Hyne knows what Seifer's been doing to stay entertained this whole time. I'll see you guys when we land."

She headed out of the cockpit and rode the elevator back down to the Ragnarok's main level. Before she entered the passenger cabin, she took a deep breath and let it out slowly, mentally preparing herself for what was likely to be a rather heated confrontation. When the doors slid open and she stepped inside, she stopped in her tracks in surprise.

Over the edge of one of the seats, hung Seifer's long legs. He'd kicked his boots off and they were resting in a heap at the base of the chair. It would have been silent in the cabin, if it weren't for his soft snores. An affectionate smile teased at the corners of her lips and she tried to suppress it as she ambled over to the row he'd been sitting in earlier. When she stood over him, the smile took over her face, and she covered her mouth to hide a giggle at the sight.

Seifer had lifted the armrest and laid down, draping his arm over his eyes. The book he'd been reading earlier was propped open on his chest, rising and falling with every breath he took.

He rarely ever let his guard down enough to fall asleep in public places, and though they were on a ship with people he knew and were familiar with, she wouldn't have thought that he'd consider it a "safe environment" to let himself go. It was surprising, yes, but in a good way. Somehow, the knowledge that that's how he viewed her friends made her irritation and anger dissipate. Perhaps he was slowly beginning to consider them  _his_  friends, or at the very least, trust them—even if it was only a little.

She sat down on the other side of the aisle, watching him sleep with a wistful expression on her face. In some ways, he was still very much the Seifer she'd known before the war. He was still quick to anger, still incredibly sarcastic, and still prone to throwing in at least three curse words per sentence. However, there was so much more to him than she'd originally thought. When they were at Garden, she hadn't cared to find out the hows or whys of his behavior, and simply took him at face value. The war, as well as the past few months, had shown her otherwise.

He was quick to anger because he was often shunned for simply being who he was. He was defensive because life had constantly thrown things at him, and he was often blamed for others' mistakes. He was sarcastic because in truth, he was more vulnerable than many people thought he was. That was a side of him that he didn't want others to see, but had shown it to her.

However, as people were wont to do, he'd changed. Yes, he still angered quickly, but he was more capable of calming himself down and working through his anger. Yes, he still used sarcasm as a buffer, but as she'd seen firsthand, he was more willing to open up and share his thoughts and feelings with her. She did still have a hard time reconciling the Seifer from the past with the Seifer she knew now. But in this moment in time, she decided to just take him as he was. Like she'd told Rinoa earlier: Seifer was simply Seifer.

As she pondered over his unexpectedly multi-faceted persona, her eyes began to drift shut and before she knew it, she'd fallen asleep, too.

* * *

A rough jolt shuddered through the Ragnarok and Quistis shot upright in her seat as her eyes darted around the cabin. Her abrupt awakening left her slightly disoriented, and it took her a few seconds to realize that a black sweater had been draped over her. It slid down her body as she stood up, glancing around for the cause of the disruption. She glanced out the window and saw the Great Plains of Galbadia that surrounded Deling City. It was closer to early evening than it was to noon, and she realized that she'd slept through the last hour and a half of their flight.

Seifer wasn't in the cabin and neither were their bags; Quistis surmised that he must've carried them out to the boarding ramp in preparation for their trek into the city. She tucked her bangs behind her ears and, with the sweater in hand, headed for the main hallway. A sudden shiver wracked her body and she realized that since the ship had been shut off, a cold draft was seeping into the cabin from outside. Quickly, she shrugged the sweater on and realized that it must be Seifer's, since it hung to about mid-thigh on her, and the sleeves nearly dwarfed her hands.

A surreptitious sniff confirmed that deduction: it smelled like spices and musk—the same scent that she'd noticed on him from before on the Ragnarok, when he'd leaned down as if to kiss her. She'd also smelled it on him in her bathroom that night, and like a young schoolgirl, a blush crept across her cheeks.

_Oh for Hyne's sake, I turned twenty-two today and here I am, acting like a teenager_ , she reprimanded herself.

The doors slid open and she hastily stepped out of the cabin. Squall, Rinoa, Zell, and Seifer were standing out in the hall, chatting with each other, but fell silent when they spotted her.

Seifer grinned and announced, "Looks like someone's decided to grace us with her presence."

"Oh please. You were sleeping earlier, too," she mumbled, pulling the sweater tighter around her frame.

His eyes flickered over her body and the grin on his face widened, making her blush again. From the expression on his face, he was obviously very pleased to see her wearing his clothing. Why the visual in question gave men such satisfaction was beyond her. However, he was obviously in a much better mood than he'd been when they'd first taken off, and for that, she couldn't complain. With a not-so-serious huff, she strode past them all, and the doors leading into the bay slid open for her. The rest of the group trailed after her and she pressed the button for the boarding ramp to lower, crossing her arms as she waited.

Seifer hoisted their bags up onto his shoulders and once the ramp was fully lowered, they all stomped down to the grass below the ship. When they were on stationary ground once more, Quistis faced Squall and Rinoa. "Are you two accompanying us into the city?"

Squall shook his head in denial and replied, "As much as I want to be there when you catch this guy, Cid's called me back to Garden. I have to return tonight."

Rinoa bounced back onto her heels and added, "Which, naturally, means I'm going too. But I'll see you guys when you get back. Promise me that you'll be safe, okay? All of you?" She stepped forward and embraced Quistis before finishing. "I know you're more than capable of finding this guy, because you're all SeeDs and stuff, but...just be careful."

Quistis pulled back from the hug and rested her hands on Rinoa's elbows. "We promise, Rin. You just need to focus on taking care of yourself. We'll be fine. We'll see you guys in a few days, hopefully."

Squall nodded and saluted the trio. Zell and Quistis returned the gesture, while Seifer just waved his hand in the air. As if he'd expected that response, Squall just shook his head and walked back up the ramp. Rinoa quickly hugged both Zell and Seifer, before waving and rushing after the commander. A few seconds later, the ramp began to close and the three of them turned, heading for the city.

Even from far away, Deling City was difficult to miss. It was a center hub for nightlife and had earned its reputation as the city that never slept. No matter the hour, there was always something going on in Deling. Right now, at the beginning of the evening rush, the entire city was lit up. The sky above them was a mid-tone blue, which faded into a deep navy on their left, and a pale periwinkle along the horizon, out past the cliffs beyond the city. A halo of illumination rose up above the Deling skyline, and as they walked closer, the glow only intensified. Since the Ragnarok wasn't too far from the city's main entrance, in just under ten minutes, they were walking past the car rental office and into the depths of the metropolis.

Once they stood on the sidewalk, Seifer dropped their bags onto the ground and rolled his shoulders. "The hell you got in your bag, Trepe?"

"Clothes. Mission materials. Hopefully nothing overly fragile, considering the way you just put it down," she remarked.

"You're welcome for carrying it for you," he retorted.

"Yes, thank you, Seifer."

Zell groaned and said, "I can never tell if you two are legit fighting, or what."

At the same time, they both said, "We're not fighting."

The martial artist rolled his eyes and mumbled, "Yeah, okay."

With perfect timing, the bus marked '08' pulled up to the curb and the accordion doors popped open for them, revealing the driver who tipped up his cap in greeting. The trio piled onto the vehicle and the doors snapped shut behind them. Thankfully, the ride into the heart of the city was shorter than anticipated, and before she knew it, they were parked in front of the hotel.

After they clambered off and thanked the driver, Zell stretched his arms over his head and let out a long groan. "Man, I'm beat. Are you guys just heading straight to bed?"

As if on reflex, Quistis rushed to clarify Zell's insinuation. "Yes, I imagine we are. Heading to bed separately, I mean."

Zell raised an eyebrow at her reaction and said, "Yeah, okay...I just meant like, are you two calling it a night? Because if you wanted to go search for the guy  _now_ , that's cool. But sleep sounds pretty great, too."

Embarrassed, Quistis felt a wave of heat rush up her neck and she muttered, "Right. No, we're probably heading straight to bed."

Seifer didn't say anything and just propped his hand up on the duffel bag over his shoulder. When Quistis didn't add onto her statement, Zell shrugged and shoved his hands into his back pockets. "All righty, then. Should we go check in?"

Without waiting for a response, he turned and strolled over to the front desk, leaning over to speak to the receptionist. Quistis and Seifer followed after him in silence and caught the tail end of his request.

"...check in?"

The receptionist nodded and asked, "Names?"

Zell cleared his throat and replied, "It should just be under SeeD - Balamb Garden."

"Ah yes, I see the reservation. Three of you, correct? Would you like two or three rooms?"

Quickly, Quistis stated, "Three." At the same time, Seifer said, "Two is good."

Zell glanced over his shoulder at them with a confused expression and Seifer explained, "You and I can share a room, dumbass."

"Oh, right," he agreed, and turned back to the receptionist. "Two is fine, please."

The woman nodded and they could hear her nails clicking against the keyboard while she entered their information. A few seconds later, she rose from her chair and walked to the back section of the space, grabbing some key cards from the printer. With an assured snap, she placed them down on the counter and said, "You will be in rooms 405 and 406. They're adjoining, so if you need to, feel free to open the door that connects your rooms. Check out time is eleven a.m. We do offer free breakfast downstairs in the lounge, and every evening, there is live piano music served with dinner. Let us know if there is anything else we can do for you."

Zell grabbed the cards and thanked the receptionist, before leading them over to the elevators. Once they were on their way up to the fourth floor, he let out a long sigh and glanced sidelong at Seifer and Quistis. "You sure  _you_   _guys_ don't wanna share a room?"

"Zell, whyever would you think that?" Quistis asked in a nearly monotone voice.  _How does he keep picking up on things?_

"Just asking. I'm fine with a room to myself and I'm pretty sure each room has two beds," he replied, which caused Seifer to snicker.

"Yeah, they better. Sorry chicken-wuss. I'm not sharing a bed with you."

"Whatever, man," Zell threw back, though he sounded almost bored, which was a stark contrast to how feisty he usually was in his responses.

Once the doors opened, they trudged down the hall towards their rooms, which weren't very far from the elevator. Zell sped up slightly and reached their rooms first, pushing open the door once he'd swiped the key card. He turned and handed Quistis her key, before saying, "See you inside, Seifer!"

Seifer rolled his eyes as he faced Quistis. "That kid has way too much energy, I'm tellin' ya."

"He's just enthusiastic about life," Quistis said in defense of her friend.

"Sure, if that's what you wanna call it," he replied as he glanced back over his shoulder. He turned back and asked, "Hey, meet me down in the lobby in fifteen minutes?"

"Why?"

"Just 'cause. Did you bring a dress of any kind?"

"A  _dress_? This is a mission, Seifer, not a vacation," she reprimanded.

"Yeah, I  _know_ , thanks for that. I'm just asking, shit. Did you or did you not?" he retorted.

"...I might've brought a light sundress," Quistis begrudgingly admitted.

"Called it. From how heavy your bag was, I figured you'd brought some extra stuff," he stated as he handed her bag over. "Wear it. I'll see you in the lobby in a bit." He turned and walked over to his door, pounding on it for Zell to let him in. Apparently, the martial artist had forgotten that each room only had one key.

Quistis rolled her eyes at the boys' antics, before letting herself into her own room. She had to admit that it was rather nice to have a bit of privacy. Things between her and Seifer had gotten significantly more confusing as of late, and some space between them would help, not hurt. On that note, she questioned why Seifer wanted her to meet him in the lobby, let alone in a  _dress_. After all, hadn't she told Zell that she assumed they'd all turn in for the night?

She briefly considered not going, but knew that the 'what-if' would only bother her for the rest of the night. If she didn't go, she wasn't likely to get any sleep and she knew that was why Seifer hadn't explained the reason  _why_  he wanted her to head back downstairs. He knew that the lack of explanation and resolution would only drive her crazy, until she gave in and tried to find answers.

_Damn you, Seifer. He apparently knows me better than I thought he did…_

She tossed her bag onto the bed and rifled through it for the dress she'd mentioned. It wasn't anything overly fancy; she'd brought it just in case she had some down time to herself. It was slightly on the shorter side, hitting her only mid-thigh, but was nowhere near as racy as the red dress she'd worn to the bar in Balamb, all those nights ago.

When her fingers brushed against the somewhat scratchy chiffon, she grasped the material and yanked her dress out of the bag. She shook it to try to smooth out the wrinkles, and ended up pulling at the ruffle on the upper section in an attempt to straighten the edges. After feeling around the contents of her bag again, she pulled out the peach fashion belt that was meant to go with the dress, and quickly shrugged out of Seifer's sweater. She laid it down on the bed and after she'd kicked her battle outfit aside, she stepped into the dress and zipped up the back, threading the belt through the small, flimsy hoops on the sides afterwards.

She hurried into the bathroom and undid her trademark clip, opting instead for a casual bun on top of her head. Purposefully leaving small wisps free, she tried to work it into an artful disarray, before giving up with a huff. She ran back to her bag and grabbed her makeup, quickly transforming her daytime look into something more appropriate for a night out.

Figuring that was good enough, she walked back into the room and tossed her makeup back into her duffel, reaching in for her flat, comfortable shoes. After all, this wasn't a date...right? He hadn't explicitly stated that it was, and she'd never dressed up for him before-not really, anyway. That time at the bar had been at Xu's insistence, not for Seifer's sake.

With a quick glance at her phone, she realized she only had three minutes to spare. She tossed her credit card and room key in her clutch and headed out the door, hurrying back to the elevator. As she rode down to the lobby, she was surprised to find that she felt...rather nervous. Again, he hadn't stated that it was a date, but she couldn't help but feel like it was. After all, this was the first time that they'd officially gone out together, alone, in a city. They'd had lunch in Esthar, yes, but that was technically during a mission and her mindset had been very much in the work-zone. Now, in what felt like a break from the stress and danger of the mission, she had a chance to actually  _have fun_.

When the elevator doors slid open, her eyes immediately landed on Seifer's broad back, standing over by the hotel's rotating glass doors. He was staring out at the street, seemingly lost in his thoughts. He'd changed into something more casual as well, and it looked like he was wearing a gray knit sweater over simple dark jeans. The thing about Seifer that had always irritated Quistis, was that he could wear the world's most ragged clothing and still look like a runway model—and he knew it, too. She also realized that they'd inadvertently matched outfits and cringed inwardly. They weren't exactly the matchy-matchy type of couple—not that they were even a "couple".

She walked towards him and since her shoes were flat, her steps were rather quiet. He didn't hear her approach and when she stood just behind him, she reached out and lightly tapped his arm. "Seifer?"

At the sound of her voice, he whirled around and she saw his eyes travel from her shoes back up to her face. A slow, seductive grin spread out across his face and he greeted her with, "You look great."

Trying not to blush like a teenager on her first date, Quistis smiled and replied, "Thank you. Uh, you do, too."

She would've never thought it'd be possible, but his grin turned more suggestive at her compliment. "Let's go?" he asked, lifting his arm up for her.

Quistis paused, hesitating before she looped her arm through his. Though she'd been excited while she was getting ready upstairs, now that she was faced with the decision of 'to go' or 'not to go', the knowledge that just that morning, things had still been awkward between them gave her pause. "I don't know...it  _is_  kind of late, and we probably should get some rest."

"You're thinking too much again, Quis. Just go with it," Seifer tried to convince her.

She glanced up into his bright, clear eyes, and after gazing into their depths for a few seconds, she let out a resigned sigh. He took that as a yes, and she allowed him to lead her out onto the street. Once they were out the revolving doors, the sounds of cars driving by and people honking assaulted her senses. The mindless chatter of other people walking around them drifted past, and she instinctively inched closer to Seifer.

"Where exactly are we going?" she asked.

"You know that the definition of 'surprise' is that you don't know in advance, right?"

Quistis scoffed and shook her head at his teasing, though it was with a slight smile on her face. Seifer turned and headed left, pulling her along behind him. They walked in companionable silence and a wave of relief washed over her at the lack of awkwardness between them. Ever since yesterday, the tension in the air whenever they were in the same room was nearly palpable, and it was starting to drive her crazy. In this stolen, peaceful moment in time, she was relieved that it was nowhere to be found. It was also the first time she felt so at ease in his presence.

They were nearly at the end of the street when Seifer came to a stop in front of a restaurant, and Quistis glanced up so she could read the sign. When she realized they were standing in front of The Renault, she gasped in surprise. "Are we...Are we  _eating here_?"

Seifer looked down at her and smiled; the sight nearly took her breath away because for the first time in all the years she'd known him, it was the most carefree smile she'd ever seen on his face. There was no malice, no sarcasm, no inherent anger at the world and anyone around them. He was just... _happy_.

They stood there on the sidewalk, staring into each other's eyes, surrounded by the crowd. Eventually, Seifer realized he hadn't replied and he looked back up at the restaurant. "It was a bitch to get a reservation, so you're welcome."

"Isn't The Renault booked  _months_  in advance? I heard it's nearly impossible to get a table on such short notice."

"I know a guy," he said as he shrugged nonchalantly.

They headed for the door, and the attendant posted nearby held it open for them. Deling was well-known for having one of the best culinary scenes, and The Renault was at the very top of that list. It was a five-star restaurant that served government officials, celebrities, and other persons of interest. Because of its popularity, reservations were made months in advance; cancellations were unheard of, and Quistis wondered who exactly it was that Seifer knew that had connections to the restaurant.

The view inside was breathtaking. Red velvet curtains draped the walls, and romantic candlelight illuminated the space. Curved staircases stood on either side of the room, flanking a small fountain that sat in the center of the rotunda. The soft gurgle of water was relaxing and Quistis practically melted into Seifer's arm. Quiet piano music drifted through the room and a hostess stood directly in front of them, with a polite smile on her face.

"Welcome to The Renault. May I have the name your reservation is under?"

"Leonhart," Seifer replied, which earned him a disdainful look from Quistis.

"Ah, yes. We always have a table ready for the Commander. Please, follow me this way," the hostess instructed, before grabbing two menus and leading them up the plush carpeted staircase.

As they followed after the hostess, Quistis hissed, " _Leonhart?_  Really, Seifer? Does Squall know that you used his connections to get us a table?"

Under his breath, he replied, "Technically I didn't. I just gave them his name when I called. I mean seriously, do you like spit in your food? 'Cuz I sure as hell don't, and that's what would've happened if I gave them  _my_  name."

A laugh escaped from her lips and she shook her head at him. "You're an ass sometimes, you know that?"

"Yeah, you love it."

Once they reached the upper landing, the hostess weaved in between occupied tables, leading them across the restaurant's floor. The atmosphere of the restaurant was obviously meant to be intimate, because though the restaurant was at near max capacity, its guests never raised their voices above soft murmurs.

When they reached a set of tall, wrought-iron and glass doors, the attendant there pushed the door open for them and they were led out onto an open balcony. A single table sat in front of them, draped in a deep, maroon tablecloth. Atop the table sat a miniature candelabra, which lit up the table with a soft, diffused glow. The attendant pulled out a chair for Quistis, and she sat down, while Seifer was seated across from her.

"Enjoy your meal," the hostess said, before she walked away. The attendant poured them both a glass of water and set the carafe on a side table before he too stepped back, shutting the door behind him.

Now that they were alone, Quistis looked over at Seifer across the table, her mouth hanging open slightly in disbelief. "This is incredible!"

"I thought you'd like it. I mean, it's fancy as fuck, so pretty much anyone with an appetite would like it, right?"

"The Renault is one of the best restaurants  _worldwide_. I'm pretty sure I'll enjoy it," she replied with a smile. "What exactly is the occasion, though?"

"Seriously? Don't tell me you forgot your own birthday?"

_My...birthday?_  She closed her mouth with a snap before she asked, "I...You remember my birthday?"

"I've known when your birthday is since we were like fourteen, Quistis. Not that hard to remember," he responded as he opened the menu.

The fact that  _Seifer_  had gone out of his way to surprise her with a birthday dinner to one of the most coveted restaurants in the city, especially knowing that they'd argued just the day before, made Quistis' chest tighten up. It was such an uncharacteristically romantic gesture-one that she'd never expected him to make-that she wasn't sure how to process it all.

"Thank you," she whispered, unsure of what else to say.

Another shrug was his response. "I'm not really good at all of this 'date' stuff, But I figured I'd be a dick if I didn't try so, here we are."

She reached across the table and laid her hand on his, as she smiled again. "I...This means a lot, Seifer. So thank you—really."

He grinned again, pleased at her praise, and said, "Tch. Yeah. It's expensive as fuck here so, you know. Enjoy it."

There was the Seifer she knew. She chuckled under her breath at him and finally opened up her own menu. However, after a few seconds of reading the exact same word over and over again, she realized that she was having a hard time focusing on the words in front of her. As if she weren't able to control her own actions, her eyes kept jumping to Seifer above the brim of the menu.

Considering how much thought he'd put into organizing the entire night, she felt like she should at least apologize for their argument the night before. She knew that he'd wanted her to say something yesterday, but as much as she hated to admit it...she'd been afraid to.

She, Quistis Trepe, youngest SeeD in all of history and a former instructor, master of blue magic and trained mercenary, was  _afraid_  to admit her own feelings.

It wasn't that she was scared of being rejected—well okay, there was a small fear of that, and probably always would be. But Seifer had never once given her any indication that he wasn't serious about whatever it was that was between them. Didn't that mean that he at least deserved an honest answer from her? Trouble was, how could she answer his unspoken question when she herself wasn't even sure of where they stood.

She knew that she enjoyed his company, which frankly, was a surprise. When he wasn't being a jerk, he was remarkably fun to be around. He had this sort of dry humor that was interlaced with vulgarity, and had it been coming from anyone else, Quistis would've immediately left the room. But with Seifer, somehow he made her laugh— _really_  laugh.

And by Hyne, did she love that about him.

Why had she run away that morning in Balamb? What had she been so afraid of? No, she knew the answer to that. She'd been afraid of someone—anyone—finding out that they'd spent the night together. They hadn't  _slept_ together, but the insinuation was there and for whatever reason, that had felt like something she'd needed to keep a secret. But  _why_? Was she embarrassed of Seifer?

Sadly, that day, the answer had been yes. She hadn't wanted her friends, or even the townsfolk of Balamb, to see that she'd spent the night with  _Seifer Almasy_. Now, though? Sitting across from him at one of Deling's most expensive restaurants, as the candlelight cast a warm glow across his undeniably masculine features, she felt  _proud_  to be the one who was there with him.

As her eyes were trained on his face, she realized that his lips were moving and the world came back into focus. She hadn't realized that she'd been shutting out the sounds around them.

"Sorry, what did you say?" Quistis asked.

He shook his head with a knowing smile on his face. "I asked what you were getting."

"Oh, I...I have no idea, to be honest," she admitted as her eyes fell to the menu again.

"I'm getting steak and lobster."

"Of  _course_  you are. That sounds horrendously packed with calories."

"Hell yeah it does."

She glanced up and met his eyes again, noticing how the corners of his eyes wrinkled up slightly when he grinned.  _Have they always done that?_

Trying not to grin like a fool, she said, "I think I'm just going to get a salad."

"Quistis, don't be one of those girls," Seifer reprimanded.

" _What_  girls?"

"The ones who get a damn salad when a guy takes them to a nice restaurant. Order something hefty, for Hyne's sake. Curves are good."

"I'm not trying to watch my figure, Seifer. Hyne knows I burn more calories in battle than I take in per day," she said defensively. "I just...there are too many options on the menu."

He opened his mouth to speak but the doors to the balcony opened, interrupting him. With impeccable timing, the waiter stepped out to their table. "What can I get you tonight?" His words were tinged with a slight accent and Quistis found herself wondering where he might be from.

They quickly ordered: Seifer got his steak and lobster as planned, and at the last minute, Quistis decided on seafood alfredo. The waiter disappeared again and once the doors were shut once more, she interlaced her fingers and placed her hands on the table.

With slight grins on their faces, they stared across the table at each other. This went on for a few minutes until Seifer leaned back in his seat and crossed his leg over his knee. He tapped his fingers on the table, ending the moment. "So."

Quistis raised an eyebrow at him. "So?"

"Shit, I dunno. We should talk about something," he shrugged.

She let out a small laugh and looked down at her hands. "What, staring at each other doesn't count for conversation?"

"Not really. But I'm down to keep doin' it, if you want to."

Her eyes shot up to meet his again and she tilted her head to the side. "Why?"

He held her gaze for a few seconds before he quietly said, "Because you look beautiful. You do all the time but…"

As if he was suddenly embarrassed, he trailed off and shrugged, dropping his hands into his lap. The sudden desire to touch him, to reassure him so that he didn't feel awkward, made Quistis reach across the table with her palm up. He looked down at her hand and back up at her, before threading his fingers through hers.

"Thank you," she said with a smile.

Again, he shrugged, though the corners of his lips curled upwards slightly. Deciding to spare him, Quistis started chatting nonsensically about her life since the war. He'd opened up to her about what he'd gone through when they were at the bar, but she'd never reciprocated. It was useless, mundane knowledge; she talked about how she'd considered applying to be an instructor again but hadn't, about how she'd floated aimlessly from day to day, just going through the motions of her life.

Getting everything off her chest felt...therapeutic. She'd never really told anyone about how  _pointless_  her life seemed since they'd returned to Garden. Best of all, she knew that Seifer would understand better than anyone else could.

Their waiter brought out their food in the middle of the conversation, and it was then that Seifer chimed in and spoke a little bit about how he'd come to work for Garden again—though not as a SeeD. He'd run into Cid in Balamb one day, and surprisingly, the old man had sat him down at the hotel restaurant, wanting to know about his life. From there, things snowballed and suddenly, he was a "third-party consultant". They both laughed about the fact that they'd never thought he'd carry the title of "consultant", but here he was.

Their hands were still entwined and as the conversation hit a lull, she turned his over, tracing the faint vein lines that ran under his skin. Even as a teenager, Seifer had always been muscular, with body mass that veered into bulky territory, as opposed to lean. Now, as an adult, the wiry ropes in his forearm were more prominent and every time she ghosted her fingertip along his skin, he tensed, causing the muscles to flex.

In a rough, gravelly voice, Seifer said, "You might wanna not do that…"

Her eyes shot up to his. "Why?"

With the slow burn of desire lighting up his eyes, he stared at her. "You know why."

Quistis blushed and reluctantly, she let go of his hand. Seifer cleared his throat and looked away, his eyes trained on the buildings below. They sat in silence, and the air was thick with sexual tension. With a single look, a single touch, he was able to set her body on fire, and she had no idea how he did it.

This time, it was his turn to fill the silence with mindless chatter. Surprisingly, he started talking about Zell. He hurriedly recounted their mission together, and gave Quistis a play-by-play of their entire conversation inside Marcus' condo. Though he was talking about work-related things, his focus was more on Zell's "ridiculous attitude" and "how that idiot ever became a SeeD and I didn't, I'll never fuckin' know".

Within seconds, Quistis was doubled over in laughter again, and the moment had passed. She was surprised to realize that, for once in her life, she didn't think about her own work a single time that night.

When their empty plates had been cleared and Seifer had paid the bill, they rose from their chairs and left the restaurant, taking their time as they strolled back to the hotel. The entire dinner had been absolutely perfect, and that scared Quistis. She found herself wary of what the future held. With the way their relationship had been since she'd seen him at the bar that first time, Quistis found herself wondering if they'd just be at each other's throats again tomorrow. After all, that was just the way Seifer was. He was generally abrasive, rough at the edges, and put up with no one's nonsense, let alone hers.

He'd never been the roses and wine type of guy, and it made her really think about  _why_  he'd pull out all the stops and plan a night like tonight. He had to have done most of it last night, after they'd been told they were being sent to Deling. If not last night, then while they were in the air and she'd been up in the cockpit with the rest of the group.

She glanced up at his profile; her eyes traced along the sharp edge of his straight nose, followed the curve of his fuller-than-average lips, and the lines of his strong, masculine jaw. In this moment in time, he was a paradox to her, and she found herself asking herself whether she could handle his back and forth, his push and pull, on a constant basis.

They made their way through the hotel's revolving door and once they were in the elevator, Seifer pressed the button for their floor. The ride up was silent, but filled with heated glances. That shared moment at the restaurant had fueled the fire between them, and spoke volumes about where the night would likely lead. When they were standing in front of their room doors, Seifer's eyes flickered over to her door, before landing on her face again.

"Still trying to avoid tellin' the rest of them about us?" he questioned. She knew that was his way of giving her an out, if that was what she needed.

She wanted him—Hyne how she wanted him—but wasn't sure if she could handle everything that came with that. Their first time had been driven by unbridled passion, and desperation at the fact that they could both have easily lost one another. At the time, they hadn't questioned why they cared so much about that—they'd simply acted on it. Now, they both had time to think about the whys and hows, and though he seemed willing to take the plunge, she wasn't so sure how she felt.

Without a word, she closed her eyes and nodded. When she opened them again, she saw him tense.

"So, I take it you  _don't_  want me to come in."

"Seifer...I don't want to fight about this. Not again, not tonight," she said quietly.

The muscle in his jaw flexed and he nodded, "Okay. I guess I got my answer."

He started to head for his door and at the last second, when his fingers were wrapped around the handle, she reached out for him. "Wait."

With a shuttered expression, he faced her again and didn't say anything as he waited for her to make the next move. Inside her mind, Quistis fought with herself on whether Zell would notice that Seifer hadn't returned. If he did, would he put two and two together or simply assume that Seifer had been with someone else, not Quistis? Earlier, when he'd asked if they wanted to share a room, she'd taken that as indication that he  _knew_  what was going on between her and Seifer, but with Zell, it was often impossible to guess how much he really  _did_ know.

Was it worth the risk? Was it worth Zell knowing and telling the rest of her friends? And if he did know, what did it really matter? What would change, other than the way her friends saw her?

In the end, was keeping their relationship a secret, worth hurting Seifer and never seeing that smile on his face again?

Seifer started to turn away from her and reach into his pocket for his key, and it was then that she knew her decision was made. She rushed forward and placed her hand on his forearm, and he stilled, glancing back up at her with that same closed-off expression on his face.

"I want you to stay with me tonight," she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

With those four words, his face transformed from tense and disconnected, to hopeful and vulnerable. The knowledge that  _she_  was able to do that to him, nearly broke her heart in two. He was never one to beat around the bush, and for once, she was thankful for that. With no further preamble, he reached for her and wrapped his arms around her waist, pushing her back up against her closed door. His lips crashed down onto hers and within seconds, his tongue snaked along the edge of hers, sending a rippling wave of desire through her body.

After a few mind-numbing seconds, he broke the kiss and placed his lips against the curve of her jaw. Slowly, he made his way down her neck, leaving a trail of kisses along her vein. The ticklish sensation made her want to giggle, but at the same time, sent bolts of pleasure shooting through her lower abdomen.

"Seifer...Seifer, wait," she whispered, her voice hoarse with arousal.

He straightened and looked down at her with heavy lids. "Give me a good reason to wait."

"Let me open my door."

She placed her hands against his firm chest and lightly pushed him back, so that she could reach into her pocket and pull out her key card. When she turned and tried to concentrate on letting them into her room, he reached down and slid her dress up, lightly dragging his fingertips along the creamy skin of her legs. He kept inching them higher, closer to the apex of her thighs, and as the light on her lock flashed green, she let out a gasp. Her eyelids fluttered in pleasure and she gripped the door handle tightly, unable to process anything other than what he was doing to her body—and they weren't even inside, yet.

"Here," Seifer whispered, his lips tracing along the edge of her outer ear. He wrapped his fingers around hers and turned the handle for her, pushing her inside with his massive body.

He kicked the door shut with the heel of his boot and since her room was pitch black now, she heard rather than saw him shrug off his sweater. The darkness amplified every sensation, every sound, and when his hands found hers again, the feeling of his skin against hers caused her abdomen to tighten in anticipation.

Silently, he led her towards the bed and she jumped in surprise when she felt his lips on hers once more. The corners of his lips turned upwards in a smile, and his fingers trailed along her arms briefly, before disappearing. She frowned at the sudden lack of contact, until she felt him making his way down her body. He toyed with the hemline of her dress for a few seconds, and inch by inch, pushed it upwards until he reached her waist. When he paused, she sensed that he wanted her help, so she took over and held her dress as he moved his hands over to her belt, quickly undoing it and tossing it aside.

In a single, rough motion, he placed his hands on her waist and spun her around, causing her to fall forward onto her hands. A surprised gasp escaped her again and she cursed herself inwardly for sounding like such a damsel in distress. She felt his fingers at her zipper and at an excruciatingly slow pace, he pulled it down, causing her to shiver as the cold air hit her exposed back.

Once it was undone all the way, he leaned down and pressed his lips against her skin, sucking ever so slightly before moving lower. It was more than a kiss, but less than a lick, and the unfamiliar sensation caused her to shiver again-though this time, it was more in anticipation of what was to come than the temperature in the room.

With deft fingers, he unclasped her bra and pushed the straps down her arms, leaving her completely undressed from the waist up. When he pulled away and straightened, she crawled up the bed and out of her dress, flipping over so that she was on her back. The sound of clothing rustling told her that he was likely getting undressed as well, and when she felt the end of the bed dip under his weight, she opened her arms for him. In what felt like the most natural action in the world, he climbed over her and she wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down for another kiss.

As his tongue slid along the length of hers again in practiced, familiar fashion, she trailed her hands down his back, ghosting her fingertips along his skin. Once she reached the waistband of his boxers, she pushed her fingers inside and tugged them down. He leaned up and hastily climbed out of them, tossing them aside before lowering his weight onto her again. This time, she could feel his desire for her against her inner thigh; the velvety soft, but rigid and demanding length caused a spike of arousal to shoot straight to her core, and she automatically opened her legs, wrapping them around his waist.

He broke the kiss again and she felt him smile against her neck, before he headed lower down her body. Suddenly feeling impatient, she threaded her fingers through his hair and broke the silence. "Seifer, I appreciate you taking the time to make sure that I'm thoroughly satisfied, but at this point? I just need you inside of me. Please."

She heard him chuckle-the sound was throaty, rough, and had her rolling her hips in anticipation. "Whatever you want, Quis."

In one sure, purposeful thrust, they were one, and Quistis arched her back as she cried out, her fingers tightening in his hair. Seifer propped himself up on his elbows and cradled her head in his hands as he continued to drive into her.

Somehow, this time was different. This time, in the dark, with their bodies connected in the most primal way, Quistis  _felt_  him.

She felt his fears, his vulnerability; she felt how they shared the same hesitations about life, about relationships, about trusting people. She felt how he pushed her higher, made her fight harder to be who she was meant to be, to be true to herself. She felt the strength in his arms as they wrapped around her, as he held her in his embrace.

The emotions swirling within her amplified every time his hips pushed against hers, and she felt tears prickling at her eyes. Unable to stop them, she turned her head to the side and let the moisture fall towards the pillow. Seifer must've heard the hitch in her breathing and he paused, rearing up above her as he lifted his hand to her face. Softly, he trailed his thumb along her cheekbone, wiping the dampness from her skin.

"Quis, what's wrong?" Though his voice was hoarse and his breaths came quickly, she could hear the concern hidden underneath his desire and that, in and of itself, made her cry even more.

"Seifer...I…" Unable to form words that would adequately describe how she was feeling, she trailed off and simply shook her head.

With surprising gentleness, he planted a kiss on her lips before slowly pulling all the way out until only the tip of his member was inside of her. His hips remained poised there as he kissed along her cheek until he reached her ear. Up above her head, he laced their fingers together and squeezed, before he whispered, "Trust me. I know," and drove into her completely.

She cried out again, both at the overwhelming pleasure and the emotional epiphany she'd just had, but was unable to vocalize. Within minutes, she felt her release creeping up on her and after one more thrust from him, the tension within her snapped and her inner walls pulsed around him. She tensed and gripped the bedsheets as she gasped aloud, riding the wave of sensations. Seconds after her release, she knew he'd reached his because he let out a husky groan and tightened his fingers around hers.

They laid there, basking in the afterglow, and she reveled in the feel of his substantial weight on hers. It was comforting, and she was suddenly afraid for when it would no longer be there. Seifer pulled out of her and rolled over, tugging her back so that her back was flush against his chest.

As he nuzzled her hair, she felt tears trailing down her face again and turned into the pillow. By inviting him into her room, she'd all but said she didn't care if their friends knew about them. With this shared moment, they'd officially made up from yesterday, and he currently had his arm around her waist, holding her close. In stark contrast to the first time they'd slept together, this time had been much more emotional and closer to making love than a 'wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am'. Granted, Seifer hadn't ever indicated that's what it had been for him, even the first time.

So if all of that was true, why did she feel so upset? She knew that he'd gone through all of that trouble to make sure that her birthday ended in the most perfect way—which was the closest Seifer Almasy would ever come to an apology. Despite the way her day had begun, his efforts had ensured that she'd had a good birthday to remember. Shouldn't that have left her feeling blissfully happy?

Trying to ignore the unease that was rolling through her stomach, she turned over, tucking her head underneath Seifer's chin. He accommodated to her shift in position, lifting his arm from her waist to drape it over her shoulders, and shoving the other one underneath her head. All of his movements felt natural—almost second nature—and she mused at the fact that they were already so familiar with each other.

Within seconds, Seifer was snoring away, but Quistis remained awake. She listened to the sound of his deep, even breaths, and reveled in the feel of his firm chest pressing against her cheek. Though she was still unsettled, she knew she wouldn't be able to pinpoint the reason why—at least not right now—and so, comforted by the knowledge that they were as close to one another as two human beings could possibly be, she finally drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lord in heaven, I actually updated?! & it's ridiculously long?! What is happening in this world? :P
> 
> First bit of business: Quistis and I share a birthday (Happy birthday to our favorite blue mage!), so I really wanted to post this on our actual birthday, considering what happened in the chapter ;) Yes, that was planned specifically for this day! Fun stuff.
> 
> Many, many thanks to Strings805, Arenoptara, and Layla Evercrest for beta-reading this chapter for me. I normally only have two people read through this, but considering how long it is and how much is in between the lines, I really wanted it to be the best it could be. So thanks to you guys for working with me on this beast of a chapter.
> 
> I know it's been awhile since I updated last, but credit is due where it's deserved. HUGE THANK YOU to runicmagitek for reading through the entirety of the story and leaving me a bajillion comments! It meant so much to me and I'm so happy that you enjoy this :)
> 
> Thank you to everyone else who has subscribed and/or left comments. It warms my heart to see that people care about this story as much as I do; it really has become my baby, my favorite project, and I'm so happy that you're all still invested in this story.
> 
> We are almost at the finish line, my friends. There are maybe two chapters left, and a possible epilogue, before we see the figurative credits roll. It's very bittersweet, but at the same time, I am so excited to see everyone's reactions to the final chapters. Hooray!
> 
> Again, thank you so much to everyone for reading this story. You guys make it all worth it.


	15. Cessation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer, Zell, and Quistis finally catch up to Marcus, but the plan doesn't work out as they'd intended.

The next morning, Seifer and Quistis headed down to the main lobby to meet up with Zell and get to work. They'd slept in—or at least, slept in as much as military-trained individuals could—and had been surprised that the martial artist hadn't knocked on Quistis' door to wake them up. While she finished getting ready, Seifer had sneaked back into his and Zell's room to grab a change of clothes. They'd met back up in the hallway a few minutes later, and Seifer had said that Zell wasn't inside. Figuring he was already up, ready, and waiting for them, they headed downstairs to the lobby.

As expected, Zell was standing right by the revolving glass doors at the front of the hotel, bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet. They knew the exact moment he spotted them, because he started waving his arm in a rather enthusiastic manner. "Hey guys!" he called out across the lobby.

A few guests turned and glared at him, but Zell didn't seem to notice—either that, or he didn't care. Seifer grumbled under his breath about the martial artist needing someone to curb his unnaturally high level of energy, especially this early in the morning.

Quistis nudged him in the side and, in Zell's defense, said, "Be nice, Seifer. He's just a morning person, that's all."

All Seifer did was grunt in response and they finally came to a halt in front of the exuberant man in question. With a smile, Quistis greeted, "Good morning, Zell."

Zell shoved his hands into his back pockets. "Mornin'! Did you guys sleep well?" he asked as he peered up at them, his tattoo scrunching up when he winked in an exaggerated fashion.

_I think he's been talking to Irvine and Selphie a little too much, lately..._

Out of the corner of her eye, Quistis saw Seifer angle his body towards her, giving her full control of the situation. She knew that this was his way of letting her know that, whether she wanted to come clean now or not, he was leaving the decision up to her. Gratitude spread throughout her chest and she smiled, though she didn't direct it at Seifer. He'd understand that it was meant for him, whether she was looking right at him or not.

She knew that if she wasn't truly ready to tell anyone, that Zell wouldn't betray her trust if she asked him not to. However, last night when she'd invited Seifer into her room, that had been her acceptance of them. She knew that when she'd asked him to stay, it had been for more than just the night. She'd meant for good. It had taken a lot for her to finally admit that to herself—that she  _wanted_ him to stay, and that she  _needed_ someone. "Stay for the night" had really meant stay for future birthday parties, future graduations, dinner together every evening. Their feelings were no longer confined to a single room, to hushed whispers and light touches in complete darkness. It was time she told her friends about them. Her actions had been a silent, unspoken promise to Seifer, and she wouldn't back out of that now.

With her mind made, Quistis leaned in and winked right back at Zell. He was obviously caught off-guard by her uncharacteristic behavior, because he staggered back slightly as he stared at her with uncertainty on his face. "Well, when we  _were_  sleeping, we slept rather well," she replied.

Zell did a double-take at her words. "Wait, wha—"

Seifer chortled at Zell's reaction, and Quistis placed her hand on her hip as she retorted, "Please, don't act so surprised. You obviously already knew and that's why you've been trying to get us to admit it since we were in Esthar."

"Nah, I mean I  _suspected_  it but….Holy Hyne! For real?" Zell exclaimed.

"Yes, and now you know for sure. Shall we?" Quistis stated as she casually strolled out the revolving doors.

The sound of Seifer's rich laughter and Zell's protests followed her out onto the street, and she had to suppress a pleased smile. It wasn't often that she got to shock people—most of her friends and acquaintances saw her as the prim and proper one who never stepped out of line—so she had to admit that that had been rather enjoyable.

Quistis leaned against the railing that ran along the edge of the sidewalk as she waited for the boys to join her. After a few seconds, they emerged from the revolving doors. Seifer had a wide grin on his face and he stared over at her with pride, while Zell was still obviously dumbfounded. He trailed after Seifer with a confused expression on his face, rubbing the back of his head.

"I think you just blew Chicken-wuss' mind, Quis," Seifer quipped.

"Aw, shut up, man! It's not every day you hear stuff like that!" Zell said defensively.

"Leave Zell alone, Seifer," Quistis reprimanded, though it was far from serious considering she still had a smile on her face.

Zell puffed his cheeks out in frustration, and a flashback of when they were all younger and together at the orphanage came back to her. Whenever Seifer bullied him and the other kids, Zell had always made that exact same face, and it was amusing to see that some things never changed. The parallel between the past and the present was also heartwarming, and it felt like a wave of deja vu passed over her as they stood on the street together.

Once the atmosphere had sobered up a bit, Quistis pushed off of the railing and crossed her arms over her small frame, cradling her elbows. As if they'd sensed that she'd entered work mode, Seifer straightened, while Zell stood at attention.

"Okay," she began, "what do we know for certain about Marcus' whereabouts?"

Since Zell had been the one who'd found the information, Seifer and Quistis turned to him. The martial artist shrugged and admitted, "Not much, to be honest. I found information that he had a condo here, too, but no specifics. No address, no general area—nothing. Every time I tried to dig further, it would either lock me out and say 'classified', or the address just didn't exist. It was like something kept loopin' me around."

Seifer scoffed. "That's not really much to go off of, is it?"

"Hey man, it's hard to find specifics when you're halfway across the world," Zell replied.

"Sure, excuses, excuses," Seifer ribbed, before looking over at Quistis. "Why don't you check in with Mr. Leader?"

Zell held up his hand and said, "Woah, wait. You wanna ask  _Squall_  for advice?"

Seifer crossed his arms as he drew his eyebrows together. "Yeah, so?"

"I don't know, man. Never thought I'd see the day where you'd ask for help, let alone from Squall."

"Tch, I ain't a kid anymore. Besides, you got any better ideas, Chickenwuss? You're the one who couldn't find the address in the first place."

"Dude…harsh."

Quistis threw her hands up in the air, exasperated with both of them. "Will you two cut it out? I'll give Squall a call, so for Hyne's sake, stop bickering."

As she pulled her cell phone out of her pocket, Seifer raised an eyebrow at her and teased, "Feel like you're babysittin', yet?"

Quistis let out a long sigh as she dialed Squall's personal number and lifted the phone to her ear. She got distracted by Seifer and Zell picking up their banter from before, and didn't hear when Squall said, "Hello?"

Still not paying attention, it startled her when Squall spoke again. "Quistis? Are you there?"

She jumped slightly before she turned away from them and replied, "Sorry, Squall. Yes, I'm here."

"What is it? Is everything okay?"

"Yes, everything's fine. Sorry to bother you. We were just heading out to try and find Marcus when Zell admitted that he didn't have a solid location on him. We were wondering if you might have any ideas or clues as to where we should start?"

"Hmm...Seifer found information on Marcus' past, right? Were there any clues in his history that might indicate where he would be in the city?"

"Not that I could find from the files."

"Well, maybe—Hold on, Rinoa's trying to get my attention," Squall said, sounded a bit irritated at the interruption. Quistis could hear a bit of shuffling from Squall's end, and heard him say something to Rinoa, though it sounded muffled. A few seconds later, in a much clearer voice, Squall finished, "She says you could try asking her father."

In the background, Quistis heard Rinoa shout, "I didn't call him  _that_!"

Squall sighed and continued on to say, "Whatever. Maybe you could try asking  _Caraway_  if he'll let you access the database in Deling. It works much the same as the one in Esthar, but goes into a bit more detail since their military is currently more active."

Quistis snapped her fingers as a sudden idea hit her. "We might be able to dig into his history further! I mean, we know that Marcus' father was in the Estharian military, but when we spoke to Marcus, he didn't have an Estharian accent. Why doesn't he? There's this whole gap in his history that we don't know anything about."

She could almost picture Squall nodding on his end when he replied, "Exactly. Start with Caraway and go from there. That's what I would suggest."

"I completely agree. Thanks, Squall. We'll check in tonight if we have any updates."

"Okay. Good luck, Quistis," the commander responded, before he hung up.

She turned back to Seifer and Zell who were staring at her expectantly. After tucking her phone back into her pocket, she explained, "Squall suggests we speak to Caraway. Apparently, Galbadia also has a database that works much like Esthar's. He thinks we'd be able to find out a bit more about both Marcus' residence in the city, as well as shed some light on the portion of his history that we don't know."

Seifer crossed his arms and nodded, though the expression on his face implied that he wasn't too happy with the new plan. "Caraway's kind of a dick. What makes you think he's going to help us? I can safely say he probably wouldn't be too willing to help  _me_."

Zell piped up and added, "Well yeah, you think? You dated his daughter and then took over part of his military during the war. I wouldn't like you either. "

"Like I needed the reminder, dumbass."

Quistis placed her hands on her hips as she looked at Seifer. "I have to agree that you're right; I don't think General Caraway would  _willingly_  help us. The only reason he assisted during the assassination attempt was because he had his own agenda."

"So why help us now?" Seifer questioned.

Quistis crossed her arms, then placed her finger on her chin as she thought up a new plan.

"I recognize that look. What are you cookin' up in there, Quis?" Seifer asked.

"I think I have an idea. Caraway won't be able to turn us down, and we'll get what we need out of him. It's just a little...unethical."

"So what, we just gonna force this guy to help us because you two are SeeD?" Seifer asked, raising a doubtful eyebrow.

To that, Quistis rolled her eyes. "You can't strongarm everyone, Seifer, let alone the Galbadian military. But, you  _can_ blackmail them."

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, the bus puttered away after dropping them off on the side of the street, across the way from Caraway's Mansion. Without a doubt, Rinoa's father had a penchant for being ostentatious, and his residence was no exception to that. The illuminated facade loomed above them, and the Galbadian banner flew proudly from a flagpole that jutted out from the left tower. There were so many spotlights aimed at the front of the house that Quistis wondered whether the man thought it was some work of art to be gawked at. For Hyne's sake, it was early morning and one could see the lights from the street.

Then she remembered who she was thinking about, and figured yes, the cry for attention was probably intentional.

After checking that the coast was clear, the trio hustled over to the opposite sidewalk and made their way up to the wrought-iron encased front door. When they stood before it, none of them moved to knock and Seifer looked back at Zell and Quistis. "Well? Who's gonna be the lucky one?"

Quistis and Zell glanced at each other, and the martial artist placed his finger on his nose. "Not it."

She gave him a reprimanding glare and turned back to Seifer, who grinned and mirrored Zell's motion. After rolling her eyes, she stepped up to the door and mumbled, "Honestly…"

She lifted the heavy door-knocker pull and slammed it back down. They could hear the sound echoing throughout the mansion and simultaneously cringed; there was no hiding or changing their minds now.

A few seconds later, the door opened, revealing an elderly butler who was slightly hunched over at the waist. "Yes, may I help you?" he questioned in a surprisingly firm voice.

Seifer cleared his throat, prompting Quistis to step aside, and he said, "Uh, yeah. We'd like to see General Caraway." A beat passed before he added, "Please."

The butler quirked an eyebrow at Seifer, before inspecting Quistis and Zell with judgmental eyes. Once he was finished with his analysis—though whether it had a positive or negative result, none of them had any idea—he turned and stepped behind the door, holding it open for them. "Come in."

Their shoes clacked against the marble flooring in the foyer as the butler led them to a sitting room off to the side of the grand staircase. After they'd stepped inside, he paused by the door and asked, "Your names?"

Quistis faced him and replied, "We're here from Balamb Garden: Trepe and Dincht. Oh, and Almasy. He'll know who we are once you tell him those names."

The butler pressed his lips together, and though he was clearly miffed at her authority, he inclined his head in a polite nod. "Please wait here. I will notify General Caraway that you have requested to see him."

"Thank you very much," Quistis replied with a smile.

WIthout returning the gesture, the butler walked out of the room, shutting the door behind him. In a wry voice, Zell noted, "He's just a ball of sunshine, isn't he?"

When Seifer scoffed, Quistis, with exasperation in her tone, chided, "Be professional you two, please."

They both held up their hands in a mollifying gesture before plopping down onto separate ornate couches. The furniture in question was just as gaudy as the set she'd seen upstairs in Caraway's office all those years ago: hunter green upholstery, paired with mahogany edging. Like the office, the walls were adorned with a dark mint shade that was interspersed with cream damask patterns. For whatever reason, Caraway—or for his sake, she hoped it was his interior designer's fault—had placed salmon pink curtains over the windows. The color contrast was not a pleasant one.

Though the boys had found seats to wait in, Quistis chose to remain standing. There was something about Caraway's attitude that had always rubbed her the wrong way, and she didn't want to be scrambling to her feet when he entered the room. Not a good way to make a good first impression, in her opinion—though technically it would be a second impression.

A minute or two later, the door opened and the General himself stepped inside. As always, he was dressed in his pristine uniform, ironed and pressed to perfection. The medals pinned to his chest shimmered in the light, and Quistis wondered whether he spent his entire evening polishing them in his closet.

She snapped to attention and saluted him, prompting Zell to shoot to his feet and do the same. In contrast, Seifer languidly rose to his full height and nonchalantly offered a pseudo-salute to the man. Caraway shook his head at the blond gunbladist and mumbled, "Why am I not surprised?"

His brown eyes drifted over to Quistis and Zell, and he tilted his head. "I do have to admit though, that I  _am_ surprised to see  _you two_  again. Well, all three of you, to be honest."

Quistis dropped her arm to her side, though her heels remained rigidly pressed together. "Sir, I apologize for interrupting you without notice. We're in Deling on a mission, and were hoping that you might be able to help."

Caraway raised a gloved finger to his chin, staring intently at Quistis for a few seconds before he spoke again. "Help in what way, exactly?"

Zell stepped forward to explain. "We're in pursuit of a suspect who committed crimes in Esthar. Our orders are to track him down and bring him in to Garden for questioning. We were wondering if you would be willing to assist us in finding his possible location?"

The general's shrewd eyes drifted over to Zell. "What makes you think he's here?"

"I found some evidence that may show he holds a residence here," Zell continued.

"Then why are you in need of  _me_?" Caraway prompted, seemingly irritated at being interrupted for nothing.

"The uh...the evidence was inconclusive. We need access to your database to look into the lead further," Zell mumbled.

Caraway hummed and strolled past them, pacing around the room as he fell into thought. Three pairs of eyes followed the general as he strolled back and forth with his hands clasped behind his back. Eventually, he halted and faced them again. "I am hesitant to provide access to such a secure server for individuals who are not a part of Galbadia's military."

Quistis drew her eyebrows together. "I understand why you would feel that way, General Caraway, but we have no interest in exposing your military's secrets."

Still, Caraway tightened his lips and remained silent, which caused Quistis to tense. She sensed that they were losing their chance at convincing him and went to open her mouth to speak, only to be interrupted by Seifer.

"You do realize,  _sir_ , that I was technically a part of the Galbadian military—even if it was for a short while. I could probably still get into the server if I wanted to. It's because we're  _not_  assholes that we came to you to  _ask_  for access," he stated.

Caraway's eyes shot over to Seifer, and Quistis cringed.  _For Hyne's sake, Seifer, we're not trying to insult him!_

She glared at Seifer, and he shrugged unapologetically as Caraway braced his hands on his desk, continuing to inspect them. After a few tense seconds, the general said, "That makes me even less willing to help you."

_Damn it_ , Quistis thought as she cringed.  _Plan B it is…_

She faced Caraway and straightened, crossing her arms as she shifted into a position that was meant to seem casual and unassuming. "General Caraway...you do realize that by not helping us, you'll be technically harboring a fugitive? This man attempted to assassinate the President of Esthar, as well as make an attempt on the life of our Garden's Commander. He needs to answer for his crimes, and if you deny us access to the server, you'll be obstructing our investigation."

Caraway shifted his shrewd eyes from Seifer to Quistis, and narrowed them at her. He was clearly unhappy with her method of obtaining answers, but knew that he'd been backed into a corner. "Are you threatening me, Miss Trepe?"

Quistis shrugged. "Only if you force me to."

He stared Quistis down, obviously expecting her to fold, but when she merely stood there and stared right back, he eventually straightened and offered a curt nod. "I can't very well put the Galbadian military in such a position, and I suspect you knew that." The general brushed past the trio and out the door, calling over his shoulder, "Follow me."

They hurried out into the hall after him, and he turned and headed up the colossal staircase. Once he reached the second floor, he hung a sharp left and disappeared into a room on their right, at the end of the hall. Quistis recognized the path they'd taken as the one that led to his study, so when they emerged in the familiar room that was lined with bookshelves, she wasn't surprised to see that nothing had changed. Caraway seemed like the type of person who appreciated order in every aspect of his life, and moving furniture and decor around seemed counterintuitive to that; it was also likely the reason that he and his daughter never quite saw eye-to-eye.

Caraway moved through the room with sure steps, rounding the corner of his ornate desk to sit in the extravagant leather chair that sat behind it. While he was booting up his computer, Quistis glanced around the room, her eyes lingering on all of the familiar items from the past.

After a minute or so, the general rose to his feet and gestured to the chair. Zell made his way over to Caraway's desk and slid into the chair in front of the computer. Under Caraway's supervision, Zell started clacking away at the keyboard. Her curiosity won the best of her, so she wandered over to stand on the other side of Zell, peering over his shoulder as he searched through the database.

Finding Marcus was easy: all Zell had to do was enter in his first and last name. What came up under his name though, was an entirely unexpected result.

"Woah...this guy was in the Galbadian military?" Zell exclaimed.

From across the room, in a tense voice, Seifer asked, "What?" His eyes immediately jumped to Caraway, who looked just as surprised as the three SeeDs did.

"Zell, what did the Estharian database say when you tried to look up Marcus' address?" Quistis questioned.

"It wouldn't let me access the information—just kept saying 'classified'. Then, if I tried again, it'd reroute me and throw up errors left and right."

"Well, this explains it. The Galbadian military must've locked the files," Quistis noted. Like Seifer, she looked over at Caraway and accused, "Which makes me wonder  _why_."

Caraway mirrored her expression before he leaned over and inspected the screen for a moment. After a few seconds, he reached out and tapped it. "There's your reason: that subdivision no longer exists. It was demolished to build the new military base on the edge of the city."

"New military  _base_?" Quistis questioned.

"My apologies, I misspoke. After the war, the military built a small outpost near the city limits. It functions as more of a lookout, than anything else. When we zoned that area, we provided compensation for the residents to find new homes. Marcus' home was one of those," Caraway explained.

"So...where does he live now?" Seifer questioned from across the room.

Caraway gestured to the screen and instructed, "Dincht, click on the tab on the far right side. It should provide current residential information."

Zell did as he was directed, and a password prompt popped up onto the monitor. He looked up at Caraway expectantly, and the general leaned over to type something into the keyboard. When he pressed enter, the box disappeared and a new list could be seen on the screen.

After a bit of scrolling, Marcus' current address was displayed and Zell quickly pulled out his phone, typing the information into his notes. "Got it," he declared, tucking his phone back into his pocket and glancing up at Quistis.

Quistis nodded absentmindedly, as she stared at the monitor. Though they'd gotten the information they'd come for, the giant gap in Marcus' history was still bothering her. "Go back to the main menu and keep scrolling, Zell. There's something...missing in all this."

Zell raised an eyebrow, but the nonverbal question lasted only a second before he nodded and acquiesced. Once he was back to the main menu, he continued scrolling down through the extremely long block of text. When he reached Marcus' educational history, both he and Quistis breathed in a sharp inhale.

"He attended Galbadia Garden? If his father was in the Estharian military, then why…" Quistis trailed off.

Zell swiveled around in his chair and crossed his arms, holding a finger up in the air. "Wait a sec. Laguna was what, in his early thirties when he was in the army?"

"I think he was closer to his late twenties," Quistis corrected.

"Okay, well, according to the picture that Seifer and I found in Esthar's database, Marcus' Dad, Ronan, was like thirty-ish when he died."

"Meaning Marcus could've been about ten? Instead of going to an orphanage, perhaps they sent him to Galbadia Garden? But why  _Galbadia_?"

This time, to their surprise, it was Seifer that spoke up. "I think around that time, Esthar and Galbadia were trying to improve their relations. Does that sound about right, Caraway?"

The general twitched ever so slightly at being addressed so informally, before he faced Seifer. "If this was about twenty years ago, then yes, you'd be correct," he replied in a stiff voice.

Quistis stared at Seifer, taken aback by how he would've known that. Seifer shrugged and said, "I had to do a quick study into Galbadia's history when I joined up with Matron. You're welcome for learning something."

She looked back down at the computer screen and observed, "Maybe Laguna sent him over to Galbadia Garden as a gesture of goodwill, then."

"Sending a kid to a military school that trains him into being a killer doesn't sound like much of a  _goodwill_  gesture, but sure, we'll go with that," Seifer called out.

They stood there in silence for a few seconds, trying to process this new bit of information before Quistis nudged Zell. "Check and see when he joined the military. I want to make sure everything is lining up."

The martial artist faced the computer again and scrolled down a bit more, until he highlighted a specific line. "Seven years later, after graduation."

"So what's his motive? I mean, I understand that Laguna and his father were involved but, why Squall? Why all this intrigue?" Quistis mused aloud.

Seifer pushed off of the wall on the opposite side of the room and made his way over to the desk. When he stood on the other side of them, he leaned down and peered over the monitor. "He figured killing Squall would equal the same pain Laguna inflicted on him, when he killed his dad—said so in his little diary. Tell you what, now that we have this guy's address, we can go  _nicely ask_  him to explain the hows and whys in detail, deal?"

Zell nodded in agreement as Caraway stepped back and crossed his arms over his chest. "Do you three even have a plan to find this man? Going into this blindly would be foolish."

This time, the general's abrasive attitude irked Quistis, and she whirled around with fire in her eyes. "We are not naive, starry-eyed, newly minted SeeDs,  _sir_. Despite the fact that I don't believe I need to remind you of this, I will do so anyway:  _we_ defeated Sorceress Ultimecia and lifted time-compression. I would appreciate it if you didn't undermine our expertise."

Seifer let out a low whistle, and Caraway raised an eyebrow at Quistis. After a few tense seconds, he conceded, and tilted his head in acceptance of Quistis' denouncement. "I will admit that I might have had my daughter in mind when I spoke a few moments ago. I apologize."

Stiffly, Quistis replied, "Apology accepted."

Zell rose to his feet. "Well, let's go get this guy."

Quistis nodded, and the three of them made their way over to the door. Before they walked out, she about-faced and addressed Caraway. "Thank you again, General Caraway, for your assistance. If you'll excuse us, we'll be heading to the residential district now."

She saluted Caraway and without waiting for him to respond in kind, followed Seifer and Zell out the door. It wasn't until they were down the stairs, out the door, and back on the sidewalk, did Zell jump up into the air and shout, "Hell yeah, Quisty! That was pretty much the  _coolest_ thing I've ever seen you do!"

While they waited on the side of the street for the bus to pick them up, she adjusted Save the Queen on her belt-hook. "I wasn't trying to be  _cool_ , Zell."

Seifer grinned as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Maybe not, but that was pretty hot, babe."

Still irritated, Quistis glared up at Seifer out of the corner of her eye. Exasperated, she spoke on an exhale. "Don't call me that. This is seriously not the time."

He threw up his hands in goodwill, though the grin remained on his face. With perfect timing, the bus pulled up to the curb then and they all climbed on, bound for Deling City's residential district.

* * *

When Zell had first found the hint about Marcus' residence in Deling, he'd told them that it was a condo, like the one they'd investigated in Esthar. So when the trio traced the address he'd found from Galbadia's database to a  _duplex_ , they'd all been rather taken aback.

"Is this...You sure this is the place, Chickenwuss?" Seifer questioned as they stood on the opposite side of the street, facing away from the front of the house. His tone of voice implied that he thought Zell was clearly not adept at checking information.

Other than a small sigh, Zell didn't react to the nickname of old. Instead, he said, "Yeah, I'm sure. His is the one on the left."

Quistis glanced over her shoulder at the residence in question, before facing the two of them again. "All right. Seifer, you and I will stake out this side of the street. Zell, I want you to head around the side of the house. If there's a back door, keep an eye on it. I don't want him slipping past us."

Zell nodded and started heading across the street, until Seifer spoke up. "Wait. You two are pretty much the same in body mass; I'm way heavier than Zell. Why don't I head over there, in case he makes a run for it and I need to take this guy down?"

"Pfft," Zell snorted. "What are you gonna do, man. Sit on him?"

Seifer narrowed his eyes at Zell before he brushed past him. Over his shoulder, he called out, "If I fuckin' have to."

Quistis shook her head at Seifer's retreating back, and waved Zell over to the row of bushes behind them. They quickly leapt over them and took cover, peering through the branches at the front of the house once they were settled. Stakeouts were never comfortable, but it didn't hurt to try.

If she'd had a choice, the park across the street would not have been her first one. It made her uncomfortable, being so in the open, but it was their only option. The rest of the houses were lined up on the same side of the street as Marcus', and the closest high vantage point was the archway, all the way on the opposite side of the plaza. Besides, it wasn't as if they could just storm into one of his neighbors' house, demanding they let them use it as a base of operations.

Actually, they could have, but they  _were_  trying to remain under the radar.

The next two hours passed without a single glimpse of Marcus: no lights turned on in the house, no one approached the front door, even his connected neighbor didn't seem to be home. Granted, it was the middle of the afternoon and people were often out and about during the day, but she'd been hoping for at least a hint of his presence.

To be honest, if Marcus was indeed absent from the house, she didn't expect him to return. He knew that they were on his trail—after all, with what happened the last time they'd seen him, how could he not?—and with this being his only other residence, she couldn't imagine that he'd be that stupid. If he'd been some small-time criminal, maybe, but with his training and military experience, he was different—he was smart. If she were in his shoes, she wouldn't return to the only other known residence listed under her name, either.

But it was their only lead, so here they were.

Beside her, Zell shifted his weight, trying to shake out the numbness from his lower legs. "Ugh, I'm gettin' antsy. This guy better come back."

Quistis let out a soft chuckle and commented, "You and Seifer are, surprisingly, more alike than either of you think."

He turned to face her sharply, his eyebrows drawn together in mild offense. "Woah, woah. We aren't alike at all! How could you even suggest that, Quisty?"

"If he were here instead of you, he'd be complaining that this is taking way too long. In fact, he'd probably just go up there and pick the lock, deciding to go investigate inside for himself. I'm actually surprised he hasn't suggested that over the radio, yet."

As if on cue, the radio in Zell's pocket crackled to life, and Seifer's deep baritone echoed around them—albeit louder than Quistis would've liked. "Yo. You guys still awake?"

Zell turned the volume down a bit, before he responded, "Yeah, duh, of course we are. Also, why are you shouting?"

"I'm  _not_. Turn the volume down, dumbass."

"I did!"

"'Kay, well, get your ears checked, then."

Quistis sighed and leaned over to speak over Zell's shoulder. "The radio is for official business  _only_ , you two."

Zell, looking thoroughly chagrined, said, "Sorry, Qu—Ice Queen. What'dya want, Knight?"

A bit of static ensued before Seifer's voice came back to them. "Just checkin' in on whether you guys have seen anything yet. It's like he's not even home."

"I don't think he is. Also, why did we let you choose the code names again, man?" Zell asked, briefly going off on a tangent.

"Because clearly, I'm the best at it," Seifer responded in a wry tone. After a few seconds, he brought them back to the subject at hand. "Honestly, I don't even think he's comin' back here."

Zell shrugged. "You never know. Maybe he thinks he got away scot-free, y'know? This is a familiar place for him, so maybe he  _will_  come back here."

"I don't wanna jinx it, I mean...that sounds too good to be true," Seifer replied. "Hey Ice Queen, isn't there a class that teaches you not to hope for shit like that?"

She looked down at the radio in disdain, causing Zell to chuckle. "I don't think she wants to answer that, Knight. Uh, keep us posted if you see anything, 'kay?"

"Sure, Chickenwuss, sure."

"Yeah, okay, we're out," Zell responded, shoving the radio back into his pocket.

Silence fell around them again and Quistis moved aside a branch that had shifted into her view. The front porch of the house was still empty, and the curtains in the windows were still shut, keeping them from seeing the inside. Either Marcus really  _wasn't_  home, or he was biding his time until the sun went down. Escaping under the cover of darkness was something  _everyone_  tried to do.

After an impatient huff—she'd never admit it aloud, but she was just as anxious as the two of them were—Quistis addressed Zell. "Does that bother you as much as it used to?"

"What?"

"Being called Chickenwuss."

In true Zell fashion, he shrugged, like it was truly no big deal. "Eh, not really. I think it bothered me before things all went down because he was constantly ribbin' on me, you know? It's like he wouldn't give me a chance to prove that I  _wasn't_  a chicken; that I wasn't the whiny kid from the orphanage that was always bullied by him."

"Well, it wasn't just you. Seifer bullied everyone," Quistis reminded him.

"Yeah, exactly. Now it's like...I kind of can't explain it, but it almost seems like he's doin' it just because he always has? He's not doin' it to be a dick anymore. At least, that's not how it feels."

A smile spread out across Quistis' face.  _For someone who's never been friends with Seifer, I'm surprised by how well he seems to be able to pin him down._

She faced the house again and quietly commented, "He  _has_  changed quite a bit, hasn't he?"

"That's for sure. I never thought I'd say this but, it was actually kind of fun being on a mission with him."

At that, Quistis looked at Zell again and leaned forward so that she could peer up into his face. "Did I just hear you admit that it was  _fun,_  being on a  _mission,_  with  _Seifer_?"

He reached over and playfully shoved her shoulder as he brushed his other hand across his chin. "Tch, he's been rubbing off on you, Quisty."

Quistis let out a chuckle and they both faced the house again as silence fell around them once more. After a few minutes, Zell shifted again so that he faced her directly, and she looked over at him expectantly. She knew exactly what he was going to ask, and she'd been expecting it to come up sooner rather than later. Zell had never been one to beat around the bush, after all.

"Speaking of rubbing off on you...what's going on between you two, huh?"

"Was that...a dirty joke, Zell?"

He leaned away from her, his eyebrows raised. "Wha—oh no, that...no. Holy Hyne,  _no_. I just meant…" he trailed off and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I'm  _teasing_ , Zell. You're right. He probably is rubbing off on me a bit too much," she admitted as she tilted her head to the side in thought.

"Anyway, yeah. So you guys are like, together?"

"I guess you could say that," Quistis mused, until she realized how unsure that sounded. "I mean,  _yes_...yes, we are."

"I honestly never would've thought that would be possible. I mean, he drove you crazy back at Garden!"

"He  _was_  a terrible student," she admitted.

"Heh, yeah. I don't think anyone liked him. I'm pretty sure Instructor Aki threw things at him on a daily basis. I remember you having some not-so nice words about him, too."

Quistis chuckled at the visual, and the reminder of their past relationship as teacher and student. Zell reached out then, placing his hand on her forearm. She glanced up at him and she sobered at the serious expression on his face. After a second or two, he asked, "Really though, Quisty...he makes you happy, right?"

Warmth flooded through her at Zell's obvious concern for her well-being. He'd always had the biggest heart out of all of them, save for Selphie, and she was astounded at how he hadn't changed—even after the war. She was glad that he hadn't lost that trait, as it was all too often the first thing to go once experience started to settle in. As twisted as it was to say, it'd been awhile since they'd had a chance to spend this much time together, and she was grateful that he'd been the one to come and help them with their investigation.

With a fond smile, Quistis replied, "Yes, Zell. He does."

Zell returned the smile, and his lopsided grin caused the edges of his tattoo to wrinkle up. "Okay, good. Cool. I'm happy for you guys, then. But uh, you know, if he breaks your heart and stuff, I'll kick his ass."

That caused her to laugh—a true, full-bellied laugh— and she wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes. "Thanks. I'll be sure to let him know."

He grinned again, before turning towards the house. "Maybe when we get back, we can all go out somewhere. Like, with the whole gang. I think it'd be kinda nice to include him and stuff. He's out in Balamb all by himself, right?"

"That  _would_  be nice. And I'm actually not sure. When I first saw him, he was with Fujin and Raijin, but I haven't seen them since."

"Huh. Well, yeah. Let's plan something when we get back."

She smiled at Zell again. "Okay," she agreed, before repositioning herself so that her feet wouldn't fall asleep.

Zell glanced over at her and suggested, "Why don't you get some shut-eye? I'm cool with takin' first watch."

She paused in mid-stretch, raising her eyebrow at him. "Are you sure? We can keep watch together, if you want."

"Nah, no sense for both of us to be up. I'll wake you up in a couple of hours?"

Quistis nodded. "Okay. Wake me if you notice  _any_ thing," she instructed, moving to lay down on the underbrush of twigs and fallen leaves. It wasn't the most comfortable place to shut her eyes for a brief period of time, but SeeDs were trained to be able to adapt to their situations, so she'd manage—though she couldn't help but long for the comfortable mattress back at their hotel.

Once she was settled, she draped her arm over her eyes, concentrated on relaxing every single muscle in her body—a form of meditation they'd been taught to help them fall asleep in any environment—and within minutes, the world faded away.

* * *

It felt like she'd only been asleep for a few minutes when she felt Zell nudging her leg, trying to wake her up. She blinked up at the canopy of trees above them, noticing that the sky was now awash with shades of violet and magenta. After she sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes, she shifted into a crouch and sidled up to Zell once more.

"See anything?" she questioned.

He shook his head in denial and replied, "Nah, nothing yet. Seifer hasn't seen anything out back, either. Checked in with him an hour or so ago."

"How long was I asleep?"

"Two or three hours?"

Quistis let out a groan and tilted her head from side to side, stretching out her neck muscles. Once she was finished, she gestured behind them and said, "You can go ahead and sleep, Zell. Just hand me the radio?"

He nodded and placed it in her outstretched hand, before crawling behind her and stretching out on the ground. Within seconds, he was lightly snoring. She chuckled at him before facing the house again, making sure to shift her focus from window to window every few seconds.

The next hour passed by without incident. Most of the houses on the street were now lit up, and the street itself was relatively empty. In Marcus' neighbor's house, the lights were now on in the downstairs window that faced the street, and she figured they must have returned while she'd been asleep. Marcus' house, however, was still as dark as it'd been when they'd first arrived.

Concerned, Quistis brought the radio to her mouth and was about to check on Seifer, when she thought she saw the upstairs window flash bright for a split second. When she did a double-take, the window was dark once more.

She drew her eyebrows together and pressed the 'talk' button on the radio. "Knight, do you copy?"

"Loud—extremely loud—and clear, Ice Queen. What's with you two and shouting?"

"Now is not the time, Knight. Did you see something—anything—upstairs? A light, maybe?" Quistis questioned, keeping her eyes trained on the front of the house.

Seifer must have sensed the urgency in her tone, because when he next spoke, his tone was devoid of all traces of playfulness. "The windows back here remained dark. There must be a separate room in the front of the house. Did  _you_  see something?"

She shook her head, unsure of whether she  _had_  seen something or not. "I thought I did. I could've sworn a light was turned on upstairs; it was really quick, probably less than a full second."

"I didn't—Wait, hold on. I'm not seeing a  _full_  light but, there's like a...a halo? A glow? Fuck, it must be a flashlight," Seifer observed.

Quistis nodded in confirmation and reached behind her to shake Zell's foot. After she heard him grunt, she instructed, "Get ready to move. He might be prepping to make a run for it."

She heard some shuffling, and not long after, Zell crawled over to her. "Whassup?"

"We think he might be getting ready to leave. He must've been inside the entire time. We haven't seen anyone go in or out, but I saw a light turn on upstairs just a few minutes ago," she explained, bringing Zell up to speed.

"Cool. I'm ready for it, man. Bring it on! We've been here all day," Zell replied, cracking his knuckles in anticipation.

Less than five minutes passed before Seifer's voice came back through the radio. "Heads up!"

Not even a full second later, Marcus came rushing out from the side of the house, running for the street. He hadn't even reached the sidewalk when Seifer appeared as well, rushing after him. It didn't take him long to catch up and when he did, Seifer leapt forward and tackled Marcus to the ground.

Quistis and Zell shot to their feet, ready for action. With urgency fueled by the adrenaline pumping through her veins, she leapt over the foliage with Zell right on her heels. The toe of her boot got caught on the top of the bush and she stumbled for a brief second, allowing Zell to speed past her. She swore under her breath and sprinted after him once she'd recovered.

She was thankful that the street was relatively empty. If things went down like they had in Esthar, the less collateral damage and witnesses there were, the better. Hopefully with the three of them here, they'd be better equipped to handle Marcus; Zell excelled at hand-to-hand combat and clearly, so did Marcus. Even though Seifer and Quistis were capable of holding their own, they specialized in the use of a specific weapon, while Zell didn't. His expertise would definitely come in handy.

She was almost upon them when Marcus overpowered Seifer and pushed off of the ground, heading for the street once more. Unfortunately for him, Zell had reached them and grabbed Marcus as he ran past, pulling him back into a tight hold. Marcus struggled but was no match for Zell's upper body strength. When he looked up and saw Quistis approaching, he panicked and threw his head back, headbutting Zell.

The martial artist let out a shout and released Marcus. Quistis halted in place, her arm outstretched and ready to unleash Save-the-Queen as soon as she got a clear shot. As things stood right now, both Seifer and Zell were too close to Marcus for her to get a good grip on him.

Marcus took off down the street and Seifer sprinted after him with Hyperion in hand. Not long after, Zell was back on his feet and rushing off in the direction they'd gone. Cursing herself for being distracted by Zell going down, she set off in pursuit of them, hoping to catch up sooner rather than later. She was fast, yes, but Zell had incredible stamina and Seifer had the advantage of having the longest leg span.

The three of them disappeared down a side street and she reached out to grab the corner of the wall, using her momentum to propel herself farther. Off in the distance, she couldn't see Zell any longer and momentarily panicked, thinking she'd lost them. With a frustrated sigh, she cast Haste and took off down the street, using the spell's effects to gain more ground. When she reached the intersection and hung a right, she saw the back of Seifer's head about fifty yards up the street. Obviously Zell had overtaken him when she'd lost sight of them.

With newfound determination, she set off after them, keeping Seifer's blond hair in her sights. He weaved in and out of the glow of the streetlamps and his shadow faded in and out, causing an eerie contrast. A fleeting, though no less ominous, hint of premonition fluttered through her and she suppressed it, concentrating on the moment. Her thighs burned as she pushed herself to run faster, and thanks to the spell, she was almost close enough to reach out and grab the back of Seifer's shirt. Up ahead, the concrete overpass loomed above them. The tunnel underneath it was bathed in darkness, and as the group raced towards it, a sinking feeling tugged at her core. It felt like her heart had dropped into her stomach, weighing her down with a sense of foreboding.

_The tunnel...If we go into the tunnel, we'll be at a disadvantage!_

Just after Zell and Marcus disappeared into the tunnel, Seifer screeched to a halt, whirling around to face Quistis. She nearly plowed right into him and he reached out to grab her arm, spinning her back around.

"Head up and over so you can meet us on the other side! I'll go after Zell and help him contain Marcus!" he shouted.

"What? But you're both close-range! It would make more sense if I went after Zell and—" Quistis tried to protest, until Seifer interrupted her.

"Just  _do_ it, Quistis. I'm faster than you, so don't fight me on this! We don't have time!" Seifer bellowed. When Quistis opened her mouth to argue back, he pressed his lips against hers, cutting her off. "I'll see you on the other side, okay?"

Without another word, Seifer raced off and disappeared into the darkness.

"Seifer!  _Seifer!_  Hyne-damn it!" Quistis swore. Glancing to her left, she spotted a narrow staircase that led the way to the second tier of the city. She sprinted over to it, taking two steps at a time until she reached the top.

Deling's streets were built extremely wide to compensate for the high-density day traffic that ran through the city, and she cursed whoever had engineered that. She hastily made her way across the twenty-lane highway, towards the staircase that would take her down to the main street on the other side of the tunnel. Her heeled boots clicked rapidly against the asphalt and for a few seconds, it was the only sound that surrounded her.

Until she'd made it about halfway across, and the world went up in flames.

The next thing she was consciously aware of was her shoulder and side slamming back down onto the street. She yelped at the accompanying sharp spike of pain and cradled her arm, trying to will the twinges of discomfort to stop. Once the initial shock of it faded, the pain dulled into a constant throbbing ache, and she rolled over onto her back with a groan, keeping her eyes squeezed shut.

The echo of her boots was no longer the only sound in the air. Car alarms blared, the sirens wailing like banshees in the night. Before this moment, she would've never thought that fire could have a distinct sound, but it did: the sound of twisted metal groaning under the weight it could no longer support, the roar of the flames reaching ever higher into the night sky. It would haunt her for the rest of her life.

When she finally recovered enough to open her eyes, she saw that the previously midnight blue clouds were now tainted, appearing almost maroon. Closer to the left side of her vision, they were bright orange, with a flickering, vivid red center. The fire didn't only burn down below. It had apparently stained the peaceful sky as well. Her eyes darted back and forth in confusion, and she slowly sat up, wincing when the ache in her side flared up again into a razor-sharp stab.

Before her lay the shredded ruins of the highway.

The center of the street was now a wide open, gaping hole. Twisted, broken steel rods pointed upwards towards the sky, with chunks of concrete lying all around the crater. It looked as if Hyne had reached down and peeled back the layers, wanting to see what lay underneath. Quistis stared at it with glassy, unfocused eyes, unable to comprehend how everything had changed in mere seconds.

As she continued to take in the horrific sight that lay before her, it hit her: Seifer and Zell had run into the tunnel after Marcus...and the blast had come from underneath.

"No...no, no, no!" Quistis shouted, scrambling to her feet. She swayed unsteadily, almost pitching forward and falling to the ground again until she caught herself on her other foot.

She raced for the staircase she'd just ascended, since it was closer than the one that had been her goal. As she rushed back down the steps, stumbling in her haste, she kept mumbling "no" under her breath, praying to Hyne that they were both all right.

She'd never prayed in her life.

The sight that greeted her once she leapt off the last step was even more horrifying than what she'd seen up above. The tunnel's entrance had collapsed, and behind the wall of rubble was a raging inferno that looked impossible to conquer.

Quistis shook her head in disbelief, chest rising and falling faster with every breath she took. A voice in the back of her mind told her that she was starting to veer into panic-attack-territory, but she chose to ignore it. Instead, she focused on what she imagined awaited her on the other side: Seifer and Zell's mangled bodies, burnt and mutilated from the initial blast. It only made things worse.

She reached up and yanked on her hair, trying to force the morbid thoughts out of her head as she let out a high-pitched wail. She fell to her knees and the gravel bit into her flesh, even through the fabric of her dress. Her hands were splayed out on the concrete, and she curled her fingers under as she tried to regain control over her hysteria.

After a minute or two, she looked back up at the wall of debris and clenched her jaw with newfound determination. If they  _were_ still alive, there was no way she was leaving them in there. She had to find out for herself.

Rising to her feet, she sprinted over to the wall of debris and placed her hand on the closest rock, wincing when it singed her skin. The flames were definitely closer than she would have liked—just on the other side of the wall—but they would be nothing for a guardian force who was colder than ice itself. She unzipped the top of her vest so she could reach inside her shirt, scrambling for the hidden pocket on the interior.

After Ultimecia, she, along with the rest of the gang, made a promise that they would no longer summon, choosing instead to retain the memories that made them who they were. However, she'd never told any of them that she kept the summoning stones handy, in case they were ever faced with a truly desperate situation. In her opinion, this more than called for it.

She wrapped her fingers around the stones at the bottom of her pocket and pulled them out, first grabbing the one that was brown with specks of gray. Closing her hand around it, she shut her eyes and channeled the energy within, feeling it surge forth from the depths of her mind. The scent of the forest, infused with the rich aroma of soil and rushing rivers wafted up through her nostrils, and when she opened her eyes, the Brothers stood before her.

"Please, I need your help. My friends are trapped in there, and I-I can't get past the rocks. I didn't know what else to do," Quistis pleaded, pointing at the massive barrier of stone ahead of them.

The smaller of the two beasts nodded and glanced up at the taller brother, hoisting his mace up and over his shoulder. Once their weapons were in hand, they walked over to the wall and with a deafening roar, pounded their maces into the concrete in unison. The entire wall shook and from the center of the pile, the rocks burst forth and arced up into the air, falling around Quistis. The weight of the rocks reverberated through the ground and up through her legs, causing her to stumble.

When she glanced back up, the Brothers were gone, along with the obstacle that had been in her way. She tucked the earth-toned stone back into her pocket, and stared at the one that was left. It was a pale blue, glassy stone, and even resting in her palm, she could feel the chill emanating from the gem. She closed her fingers around it, and the call to Shiva was answered almost immediately.

The goddess of ice appeared before her, encased in a shard of ice that shot up from the ground. It shattered, and though Quistis raised her arm in front of her face in reflex, she knew that the ice would dissipate before it even reached her. Shiva blinked down at Quistis, awaiting her command.

Again, Quistis pointed at the tunnel, though this time it was at the colossal fire that raged out of control, and not the wall of debris. "I need the flames to stop burning, but you can't use Diamond Dust. My friends are in there and I don't know—" Her voice broke and she paused, attempting to collect herself before she finished. "I don't know if they're alive. I can't risk them getting caught in the blast."

Shiva nodded in understanding and flew off towards the tunnel. Slowly, she floated over what remained, shooting down controlled blasts of ice from her palm whenever she hovered over the flames. Quistis ran after her, making her way over residual debris as she followed the GF's path.

They'd only gone a few feet in when Quistis caught a glimpse of an arm protruding from a pile of rubble. It wasn't moving; the fingers were lying immobile and stiff. The skin was scratched and gouged beyond belief, but she would've known that arm anywhere. There was only one man she knew who had that kind of muscle mass and strength in just his forearm alone.

"Seifer...oh  _Hyne_ , Seifer," Quistis gasped, sprinting over to the pile. Her vision was blurry, and she realized that she must've started crying when she spotted him.

Overhead, Shiva paused in mid-air and watched Quistis as she tried to pull the rubble off of Seifer's body. No matter how much she tried to claw at the rocks, there was too much of it, and she wondered how anyone could possibly survive that much weight on them. Her fingertips started to bleed from how desperately she was pulling at the sharp debris, and eventually, Shiva floated down to the ground. With a wave of the GF's hand, the rocks flew aside and only Seifer was left.

Quistis' hands flew to her mouth and she let out a choked sob. The reason she'd seen his arm through the rocks was because it was bent at an unnatural angle, obviously broken. His face was battered and bruised, and his body wasn't in much better condition. There was blood everywhere, and her stomach churned at the knowledge that it was his. On her hands and knees, she scrambled over to him, hesitating before she reached out to cradle his face.

"Seifer...Seifer, please be alive," Quistis whispered.

In her mind, the quiet whisper that she knew to be Shiva's echoed, " _He needs healing. Stay with him. I will continue searching for your other friend_."

She glanced up at the GF, gratitude etched on her face. Shiva nodded and floated up into the air again before she drifted away, farther down the tunnel.

Quistis looked back at Seifer, unsure of where to begin. SeeDs were required to receive standard medical training, formatted for field use, but she'd always been on the front lines as offense; she'd never specialized in healing. Running through the checklist in her head, she knew with utmost certainty that she couldn't move him—not until she assessed the true extent of the damage. Even then, if he had internal injuries, moving him could mean life or death. All the healing she did would have to happen here.

She reached out and tried to peel back his shirt, but his blood had dried, causing the fabric to stick to his skin. Cursing under her breath, she channeled a water spell and aimed it off to the side. Working quickly so that she retained the moisture from the spell on her fingertips, she traced them down the front of his shirt, wetting the fabric enough so that it was pliable. Finally, she was able to peel it back.

Once his skin was exposed, she gasped again. It was nearly impossible to see where each cut began and where the next ended. Seifer's entire torso was littered with damage and caked in blood, and Quistis' lower lip trembled as she tried to hold in another sob. Squeezing her eyes shut, she took in a shaky breath and opened them once more, placing her hands against his body as gently as possible.

The luminescent, sparkling tendrils of Curaga snaked down her arms and into Seifer's body, causing his lifeless form to glow. When the first spell ended and he still didn't move, she channeled the second spell. After each one, Seifer still didn't open his eyes, though his chest continued to rise and fall so Quistis didn't lose hope. It wasn't until the fourth spell that Seifer finally took in a sharp inhale and cracked his eye open, though it was unfocused and he was clearly still disoriented.

Quistis immediately dropped the spell and, ignoring the burn in her veins from the overuse of magic, she brought her hands up to his face again. "Seifer? Seifer, can you hear me?"

His bright eyes—though they were currently dulled by the pain he no doubt was experiencing—swiveled around to meet hers. In a hoarse, broken voice, he asked, "Quis...tis?"

Tears pooled in her eyes again and she smiled in relief. "Yes, it's me. You're going to be okay."

"It...everything...fuckin' hurts…"

"I know, I know. Don't talk if it hurts, I—" Quistis was interrupted by a light breeze blowing past, and she glanced up to see Shiva floating back towards them.

The guardian force was still too far away for Quistis to focus on what was in her arms, but she could tell that Shiva carried something—or someone. At first, she thought it might be Marcus but she couldn't figure out why the GF would think she'd care to see his body. If the blast came from farther down the tunnel, Marcus was likely dead.

It wasn't until Shiva landed on the ground a few feet in front of them, that Quistis recognized the clothes on the body: oversized denim shorts, that bright red and black jacket, leather fighting gloves...they were clothes that she'd seen every day for years, clothes that she'd know anywhere.

In hindsight, Quistis would wonder whether it was simply her mind in denial that caused her to remain so numb at first, or whether she truly had been too much in shock to put two and two together at the time.

When the realization finally hit her a few seconds later, she let out a broken sob and clutched Seifer's hand tightly in her own. Slowly, Shiva approached them and the body's head bobbed up and down with her every step, causing the now-limp blond strands to sway from side to side. The only reason Quistis noticed this was because she recognized the way it moved—only bodies with no soul remaining, no life inside, had such loose movements, and that knowledge shattered her heart into fragments that she knew would never come back together quite the same way.

Once Shiva stood before them, she bent over and gently laid Zell's body on the ground, keeping his face turned away from the pair. Though Quistis had always believed that guardian forces were unable to feel emotion like human beings did, the expression on the goddess' face implied otherwise. She made her way over to Quistis' side and laid her cool hand on the blue mage's shoulder before whispering, " _I am so sorry_ ," and disappearing back into the ether.

With unfocused eyes, Quistis stared at the body before her, unable to comprehend how they'd reached this point. It was obvious to her, even with tears clouding her vision, that Zell had been much closer to the initial blast than Seifer had been. His body was far more damaged, his skin burnt and ruined, and she suspected that Shiva, in an attempt to be humane, had healed him as much as she could before bringing him back to them.

However much the guardian force had done, it couldn't hide the grotesque, vivid red lines criss-crossing the martial artist's skin where the blast had torn him apart. Quistis felt bile creeping her throat and she looked away from her friend's body, clenching her jaw as she tried to fight the nausea that threatened to overtake her.

Seifer squeezed her hand and she almost didn't feel it, the sensation was so faint. She glanced down at him, and the tears that hadn't left her since she'd first seen his arm coming out of the rubble, threatened to spill over onto her cheeks.

Even though he was injured and barely conscious, he met her eyes with a fierce determination that was wholly his own and always would be, even in the worst situations. "Chicken...wuss?"

When she heard his nickname for Zell, she lost all control over her emotions. She shook her head as the tears she'd been trying to hold back finally streamed down her face.

"No, Seifer...Zell didn't make it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys. I am so sorry. Please don't hate me D:
> 
> Few things I wanted to mention. A bit of head canon shift as far as how GFs work. I know it's kind of confusing right now, but all will be explained in the next and final chapter. 
> 
> Thank you to Arenoptara and Strings805 for beta-reading for me. In turn, extra special thanks to Layla Evercrest for pushing me to make this chapter even better than the first draft was. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who still leaves comments on this story. Hearing your thoughts and being able to converse with you on the events of the chapter mean so much to me! 
> 
> Despite the ending of this chapter...I hope you guys still enjoyed it :)


	16. Terminus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of the mission to Esthar is more than Quistis expected.

* * *

_Terminus: end;_

* * *

Three weeks had passed since Deling. Three long weeks since their mission had come to a violent, and heartrending end, since one of her closest friends had died at the hands of someone she considered to be an evangelical maniac. Truth be told, they still didn't know everything about Marcus and the true reason behind his actions. They knew of his history, and his motives, but they'd never had the chance to hear the real  _why_  of it all, from  _his_  mouth. Only Seifer might know the answers to those questions, and he'd yet to open his eyes.

There was one more thing she could pin on Marcus: the three weeks since she'd heard his voice, the voice of the man she loved.

The silence and uncertainty was killing her. It was a slow, excruciating death, one that radiated outwards from the innermost part of her soul, an ember that gradually destroyed everything that made her who she was.

It was funny—in the most unhumorous way possible. Only six months ago, she'd wondered where her life would take her. She'd had no purpose, no goal; she simply floated from day to day, hoping that something would just fall out of the sky and magically turn her life around. When that very thing had happened—in the form of the mission to Esthar, and Seifer being unceremoniously thrust back into her life—she'd cursed Hyne and asked what she'd done to deserve that torture. Oh, how she'd thought it was such cruel and unusual punishment.

Now, here she was, sitting beside his hospital bed, listening to the slow, but thankfully steady beeps that told her he was still alive. Her arms were resting on the bed beside his limp hand, folded to provide a makeshift pillow for her heavy head. Every time the machine beeped, she blinked in response. The action was sluggish and almost forced, as if she had to remind herself that it was necessary.

She'd spent three weeks at his bedside, jumping in excitement every time he so much as twitched. Both mentally and physically exhausted, she let out a sigh and straightened, rising to her feet shortly afterwards.

_I need to get out of this room. Even if it's only for five minutes. Right. Five minutes is the longest I can afford to be gone, just in case something...happens._

She turned and nodded to Dr. Kadowaki—who mirrored the action with a grim expression on her face—before walking out of the infirmary. The good doctor had seen Quistis all day, every single day, for the past three weeks. She'd seen Quistis' health deteriorate, eaten alive as she was with worry. She'd seen the many tears, late at night; she'd seen the desperate way she'd clung to Seifer's hand, afraid to lose him, too, as she begged for him to wake up.

If she hadn't had tunnel vision and only been concerned with Seifer's condition, she might've been embarrassed at the uncharacteristic behavior she'd been exhibiting as of late. With the way things stood now, Quistis could care less. As Seifer would say,  _fuck 'em_.

It was late—three in the morning to be precise—and the lobby was deserted. Listlessly, she made her way towards the cafeteria, desperate for...something. She wasn't sure exactly what, though. Lately, anything she tried to eat refused to stay down, and as far as liquids went, there wasn't much that piqued her interest—not even coffee. For her, that was especially surprising. Coffee was her lifeblood, her elixir of energy, her main source of...well, everything that kept her running in the early morning hours.

As of the past three weeks, the desire to hear Seifer's voice had replaced that.

When she walked into the empty cafeteria, the lone worker behind the counter smiled at her. Even though she rarely actually ate the food, she figured going through the motions might help—that, and Dr. Kadowaki practically forced her to. In order to lessen Dr. Kadowaki's concern, she had been coming to the cafeteria every night, with the intent of ordering at least one small item. The first few nights, the counter had been unmanned. Clearly, Dr. Kadowaki and said something to the Headmaster, because the day after, Bertha had been waiting for her.

Quistis walked up to the counter and smiled in return. "Hi, Bertha. Just a coffee, please."

Bertha tilted her head and, in the tone of voice that only mothers, grandmothers, and naturally nurturing women could use, asked, "Not even a hot dog, dear? You should eat something when drinking caffeine, you know."

A quiet chuckle escaped her and she nodded. It was easier to simply accept the woman's concern, rather than mustering the energy to argue with her. So, Quistis agreed, "One hot dog, then."

"That's the spirit." Bertha walked off and rummaged behind the partition, returning a few seconds later with a steaming to-go mug of coffee and an oblong object wrapped in tin-foil. "Here you are, dear. Late night again?"

Quistis lifted her mug in silent thanks, opting to ignore the question as she turned to leave. At the last minute, she changed her mind and spun around, meeting Bertha's concerned gaze. She had asked Quistis that question every night since they'd returned to Garden, and every time, Quistis never elaborated on why she was up so late. For whatever reason, tonight, she felt the need to talk to someone—anyone. Bertha just so happened to ask at the right time.

"I...nothing's changed. I keep hoping he'll open his eyes and say something, or even just... _look_  at me," Quistis muttered.

Rumors were an infectious disease at Garden, and when they'd returned from their mission, practically the entire school knew about Seifer's condition by the end of the first day. Bertha was clearly no exception; working in the cafeteria made one incredibly receptive to hearing the latest gossip.

The older woman leaned down, bracing her elbows on the counter as she waited for Quistis to continue. It was as if she sensed that Quistis just needed to vent, get things off her chest. She was right.

In a quiet voice, Quistis dove right in. "I feel like I don't even remember what he sounds like, and that makes me feel like a horrible person. How could I not remember the sound of his voice? And I...I'm so afraid that he won't wake up. That he'll stay this way, and eventually, I'll have to make the call to pull the plug." Her voice began to shake, and her grip around the coffee mug tightened. "But how can I? How could I possibly be the one who decides whether I lose him, in addition to losing Zell?"

Bertha reached across the counter and laid her fingers gently on Quistis' forearm. "Who says you'll lose him? That's not a sure thing."

With a slow shake of her head, Quistis replied, "It's been  _three weeks_. Wouldn't he have woken up by now?"

"All you can do, honey, is not give up hope. You're at his side every day, every night. That counts for something."

Again, Quistis gripped the mug tighter, staring down at the steam that was slowly rising from the opening in the lid. Dejected, with tears stinging her eyes, she mumbled, "I don't know that it does."

A lump formed in her throat and she fought to swallow it down, trying to keep her emotions in check. Overcome with feelings that she didn't dare accept as truth, she turned abruptly and hurried out of the cafeteria without another word. She ran through the lobby, not paying attention to her surroundings whatsoever. Unbeknownst to her, her feet carried her to the quad and she stumbled down the multiple steps, not coming to a stop until she stood just before the newly erected granite slab that stood on the far end of the room.

Just after the end of the war, Cid and Edea had built a memorial for those who had fallen, and it now stood where the event stage had once been. The newest addition to the memorial rose higher than the others, its pristine condition almost an insult to the rest. High-quality granite was hard to come by nowadays, but Cid had fought hard to commission this piece from the far-reaches of Trabia. Carved into the snow-white, glittering stone at her eye-level were the words, "In loving memory of Zell Dincht. Dear friend to many, loyal SeeD, and the bravest of us all."

Quistis sank to her knees, her mug of coffee and wrapped hot dog forgotten on the floor in front of her. She stared up at the letters, feeling a strange sense of numbness sweeping over her. Out of nowhere, the realization that she'd brought a hot dog from the cafeteria—something normally so difficult to get a hold of—to Zell's  _memorial_ , elicited a completely inappropriate response from her. Hysterical laughter bubbled up from her chest and when it spilled out, the boisterous giggles echoed throughout the quad. When the sound doubled back to her, it sounded even crazier than when it'd left her.

Laughing? At a memorial site? She'd officially gone crazy.

When the delirium passed, Quistis wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes and gazed upwards at the stone, a smile teasing at the corners of her lips. "Even when you're not here anymore, you can still make me laugh. Hyne, I miss you, Zell…"

Tears sprang forth again, but this time, they stung with the bitter edge of true sadness, as opposed to crazed humor. Unable to stem the flow, they spilled down her cheeks and fell onto her thighs, the warm moisture seeping into the fabric of her pants.

With a garbled laugh, she pushed the hot dog forward until it rolled to a stop at the base of the stone. "Here. You'd probably enjoy it more than I would, anyway."

The memory of Zell's sheer, almost tangible excitement when he received a beloved hot dog made her cry even harder, and she cradled her face in her hands as she sobbed. "Oh Zell, what am I supposed to do? What if he  _doesn't_  wake up, and I'm left with just  _memories_ of the both of you? I know I have Squall and Rinoa, and Selphie and Irvine too, but...it's not the same. It's just not the same."

Quistis lowered her hands and stared up at the words on Zell's memorial again. "What do I do without him?"

* * *

In the infirmary, the slow, steady beeping of Seifer's heart rate resounded throughout the room. Dr. Kadowaki rose from her desk with a long sigh after shutting off her computer for the night. It'd been nearly a half an hour since Quistis had left for her nightly visit to the cafeteria, and she found it odd that the younger woman had yet to return. It was unlike the former instructor to be absent from Seifer's bedside for longer than ten minutes.

She'd stepped through the doorway and reached behind her to flip off the lights, when she noticed the beeping gradually increasing in rhythm. In disbelief, she whirled back around and eyed Seifer's still form, narrowing her eyes in confusion at a sound she'd been bracing herself to never hear again. When the rapidity didn't slow, she hurried back into the room and over to the monitor beside his bed, staring at it with wide, incredulous eyes.

"By Hyne…" she muttered, glancing down at Seifer, waiting for something—anything—to happen.

When the young man slowly opened his eyes, the tears that had been welling in her own finally spilled down her cheeks. She reached down and gently touched his shoulder, so as not to surprise him, and whispered, "Seifer?"

His bright eyes swiveled around to focus on Dr. Kadowaki, and he blinked a couple of times in rapid succession. With a croaky voice, Seifer mumbled, "Doc...where's Quistis?"

* * *

The tell-tale chime of an announcement coming through the overhead system startled Quistis out of her emotional reverie, and she clumsily rose to her feet, trying to smooth her frazzled nerves back into place.

Once the chime died down, Dr. Kadowaki's frantic voice resonated throughout the expansive room. "Quistis, get back to the infirmary! Now!"

Whatever the reason, Dr. Kadowaki was clearly excited, and that terrified Quistis. As much as she wanted this, to think that maybe Seifer had finally woken up, she was afraid to get her hopes up.

She walked towards the lobby, and as she made her way back to the infirmary, she fought to contain her optimism. It was too soon to hope for the best, and she tried to listen to the ever-present voice of reason at the back of her mind—the one that reminded her that the rest of the night could easily go one of two ways: either Seifer had woken up, and they could finally find out exactly what happened, or Dr. Kadowaki would tell her that it was time to say goodbye.

Though she'd practically said as much to Zell's memorial a few minutes ago, she wasn't sure that she was ready to face the actual reality of things.

Subconsciously, she increased her pace and was now sprinting back towards the infirmary. When the electronic door slid open with a near-silent whoosh, she raced inside and was hit with a wave of deja vu as she stood at the end of Seifer's hospital bed. The parallel between the current moment and the last time she'd been called to the infirmary—to pick up Squall after a rough training session between he and the patient in question right now—struck her as disorienting and bizarre.

Seifer was sitting up, propped against the headboard with a pillow behind his neck. With her mouth gaping open, she stood there, staring at him for a solid minute or so in complete silence. She knew the exact moment he was sick of the quiet because, in true Seifer fashion, he tilted his chin up at her and wheezed, "Hey."

Quistis sucked in a sharp breath, and was hit with an overwhelming sense of both relief and irrational anger. She surged forward, swinging her arm back before punching Seifer in the arm.

He yelped in legitimate pain and cradled his bicep, wincing as he grunted, "The hell, Quistis?"

From behind her, Dr. Kadowaki reprimanded, "Please don't hit my patients, Quistis." Though her words were strict, they lacked true admonishment—the doctor had likely expected Quistis to react in that exact manner. The nonchalant way Seifer had greeted the former instructor was a bit uncalled for.

"You finally wake up after  _three weeks,_  and all you can say is  _hey_?" Quistis scolded from between clenched teeth.

Seifer shrugged and admitted, "Okay, I could've handled that a bit better."

"Finally,  _some_ thing we can agree on," she replied, crossing her arms as she glared down at him.

Dr. Kadowaki cleared her throat and laid a hand on Quistis' shoulder. "I'll leave you two alone for the night. Seifer, I'll have to report to Squall that you're finally awake, so I'd expect him in sometime tomorrow to debrief you."

Seifer nodded, and the doctor walked out of the room, dimming the lights behind her. Once the door slid shut, he let out a low chuckle and said, "I swear that woman is psychic. I was about to say that the hellishly bright lights were hurting my eyes, and she goes and does that."

"Well she  _is_  a doctor; she probably noticed that your pupils were responding to the fluorescents."

"Yeah, sure. Guess that's true." He narrowed his eyes at her. "You gonna stand there all night? I sure as hell ain't goin' anywhere."

Only five minutes of him being awake and they were already at it with their usual banter. With that realization, she let out a dry laugh and sank down into the chair that had been her substitute bed, as well as her retreat from the world and all her responsibilities—her  _anchor_ —for the past three weeks.

As she'd done every day prior to today since they'd gotten back, she laid her head down on the mattress, resting her cheek against her forearm. Like before, her eyes drifted up towards his, but this time, pale blue met vivid turquoise, and she exhaled a sigh laden with relief. The overwhelming emotion flooded through her, and with that relief, came the onslaught of  _pain_ —finally, she felt something other than crippling anxiety, and it  _hurt_. She'd never been the type of woman who was prone to being overtaken by her emotions—that was Rinoa's territory. But she thought that, more than any other time in her life, this moment deserved an appropriate reaction. So, she let the tears flow freely.

In that uncanny way that he'd always been able to do, he sensed exactly what she needed and reached out, running his calloused fingers through the fine strands of her flaxen hair. Her eyes slid shut, reveling in the familiar sense of intimacy that ran through them like an electric current—a sense of intimacy that she'd never thought she'd feel again. She'd been so sure, so afraid that he wouldn't come back to her.

"I know, Quis. I know," he murmured as he continued his ministrations.

The rough sound of his voice elicited more tears, and they fell from her eyes, soaking the fabric of her shirt. She didn't make a sound as she cried for the nth time that day, and Seifer continued to caress her hair, uttering quiet reassurances to her. Over the past twenty-one days, she'd only gotten maybe four hours of sleep intermittently throughout the day, and her eyes kept trying to slide shut. She was afraid, though. Afraid that if she did fall asleep, that this would turn out to be a dream and she'd be back to a few minutes ago; she'd still be waiting to hear his voice again; she'd still be afraid to lose him forever.

After a few minutes of fighting human nature, Seifer chuckled and instructed, "Go to sleep, Quis. I'll still be here when you wake up."

She hummed in response to his familiar words, and the comfort they provided. Before she knew it, she fell into the soundest sleep since before Zell had died.

* * *

_Six hours later._

Seifer's fingers now lay motionless, though they were still threaded through her hair as they'd been when she'd fallen asleep. In the hazy limbo of slumber, her mind didn't register the events of last night, and the lack of motion caused her to panic. She shot upright in her chair, her eyes wide as she gazed at Seifer's face. It was relaxed, and his mouth lay slack; like the past few weeks, his eyes were closed, and she could see them shifting from side to side, witnessing dreams that only he was privy to.

Still wracked with dread, she reached out and shook his large frame, desperately calling out his name. To her surprise and relief, he jolted awake and glared up at her with sleep-fogged eyes. In a hoarse voice, he asked, "What the fuck?"

Sagging back into the chair, Quistis let out a long, drained exhale. "Oh, thank Hyne."

Seifer stared at her with an unreadable expression on his face. After a few seconds, he slowly asked, "What's wrong?"

"I just...I thought…" She trailed off and ran her fingers through her tangled hair, wincing when they snagged on a knot. How Seifer had managed to comfort her last night without tearing out every last strand was beyond her. After taking a deep breath, she tried again. "I thought you'd...fallen back asleep—back into your coma."

The unreadable expression morphed into concern, and he drew his eyebrows together. As he rubbed his sore arm, the one that'd been broken, he said, "Nah, I promised you I'd still be here, didn't I?"

She met his gaze and smiled, though it was burdened with exhaustion. "Yes, you did. I'm holding you to that."

He grinned and shrugged his broad shoulders. "Wouldn't have expected any less from you." After a quick glance at the clock on the far wall, he asked, "What time is it?"

Quistis looked over her shoulder at the clock. Worried that his vision had been affected, she asked, "Can you not read that?"

"Well, it's kinda blurry. I could _guess_ , but why do that when I could have you read it  _for_  me?"

With a roll of her eyes, she turned back around and said, "It's just before ten in the morning."

"I take it Mr. Leader'll be here sometime soon."

"Oh, right. Yes, I imagine he'll be here shortly. Let me go call him." She stood and walked towards the phone on Dr. Kadowaki's desk, but Seifer reached out and grabbed her wrist.

"Let him come when he comes. I got some shit to ask you about, first."

His uncharacteristically grave expression caused Quistis to freeze mid-step, and she slowly turned back around. As she sank back down into the chair, she mumbled, "All right…"

He stared at her for a few seconds, clenching and unclenching his jaw. From where she sat, she could see the muscle twitching, and in an attempt to reassure him, she reached out and placed her hand on his. His eyes dropped to where their hands were now connected, and he flipped his palm upwards, wrapping his fingers around hers.

"Chickenwuss," Seifer stated.

At the sound of the old, familiar nickname, one that had been so derogatory at first, but now held so many underlying emotions, Quistis tensed. Out of reflex, she moved to pull her hand out of his. It wasn't that she was offended that Seifer was asking about Zell; he had every right to want answers. It was more so that she wasn't sure if she wanted to be the one who told him. She didn't know if she could without losing her composure.

Seifer tightened his grip, not allowing her to back away, and she let out a tiny, resigned sigh. "What about Zell?"

"What happened after the tunnel? I need to know."

Quistis looked away, focusing on the steady rise and fall of the heart rate monitor instead of Seifer's face. That sound had become a crutch over the past few weeks, and now, she found that it helped to listen to the steady rhythm as she tried to compose her answer. "After you passed out from your injuries, everything was kind of...quiet for a little bit. It took at least fifteen minutes for emergency responders to arrive at the scene. I'm not sure whether they realize that fifteen minutes is a lifetime when it comes to medical aid, but…" she trailed off, pausing to take a deep breath. "I ended up having to cast Curaga on you every few minutes, just to keep you alive. It was  _terrifying_ , Seifer. If I'd run out of spells, or decided not to junction that morning—"

It was then that Seifer interrupted her. "I thought you all made that oath, or some shit, to not junction again?"

She hesitated for a brief second before she replied, "We did. Considering everything that had happened in the mission so far, I—I didn't feel prepared  _not_  junctioning. Byproduct of being a SeeD, I guess. Considering what  _did_  come to pass, I'm glad that I made that decision. I don't regret that, at least. Before you ask, yes, I told Squall. He wasn't happy but, he understood. More than Selphie and Irvine did, I think."

When he nodded, she continued. "I...I cast a bit too much, according to Dr. Kadowaki. By the time they got us to the hospital, my—the veins in my forearms were all black and blue. Oddly enough, I don't remember feeling any pain. I recognize that now as a symptom of shock but, at the time, it was like I was seeing the world through this foggy lens. I knew we were at the hospital, I knew I'd pushed myself too far, and I knew that you desperately needed medical attention. But there was this lack of panic, this...emptiness that I couldn't comprehend.

"Not long after we got there, I ended up passing out from overexertion. According to Dr. Kadowaki, we were both hooked up to Hi-Potion drips and, after a day or two, I woke up; you didn't. By the time Garden came to pick us up, you still hadn't opened your eyes, and it was then that I realized that things might've been more serious than I'd originally thought."

Seifer narrowed his eyes at her and said, "You sound like you're lecturing about history, Quistis. I get that you were probably scared shitless, but the way you sound right now—like you weren't there—is really fuckin' weird."

She shook her head and furrowed her eyebrows in irritation. "Because that's how I  _felt_ , Seifer. I was there, but I didn't feel like I was there. This is the first time I—that I've even tried to talk about what happened. I'm sorry that you feel like I'm not doing the recollection justice or—"

"That's not what I meant," he interrupted. "I meant that I'm worried about you, damn it. People don't just recall shit like this with a monotone voice. Not when one of their friends  _died_."

She waved her hand in the air dismissively and said, "I'll talk to someone when all of this is over. Now, do you want me to finish, or not?"

"Fine. Finish," he grunted.

Quistis let out a long sigh and faced the heart monitor again. "As I was saying, things were more serious than I'd thought. We were transferred over into Dr. Kadowaki's care. After she set your arm in a cast, she immediately began alternating between Hi-Potion drips and Regen spells for you, in the hopes that it would expedite your body's own healing process. I don't know all of the medical specifics of everything she did, and you can ask her if you want, but I do know that she fought hard to keep you alive. Apparently there was a lot of...internal bleeding."

Another lump formed in her throat and she paused, turning towards the door as she tried to collect herself again. When Seifer squeezed her hand, she faced him and he nodded in encouragement. Her eyes fell to her lap and she quietly added, "I think that was the worst part. There were times when her expression told me that she was scared you might not make it, and that scared  _me._  I was so afraid that I might lose you  _both_ , and that…"

When she didn't continue, Seifer said, "Hey, let's skip that part. I'm up now, so, think positive...or some shit like that."

Quistis let out a dry laugh and replied, "Has anyone ever told you that you're terrible at comforting people?"

"Yeah, I get that a lot, actually."

That elicited another laugh from her and once it died down, he asked, "So what happened after all the medical craziness?"

"Once I was out of bed, Zell's funeral was held—"

"Hold on," Seifer interrupted. "The funeral already happened?"

"Seifer...you've been in a coma for three weeks. We couldn't exactly wait in the hopes that you'd wake up sooner rather than later. I mean, I  _did_ hope for that; of course I did."

"I get that but... _fuck_. I didn't want to miss the kid's  _funeral_ ," he muttered.

This time, it was her turn to squeeze his hand. He refused to look her in the eye, choosing instead to stare down at his covered legs as he gripped the hospital blanket tightly in his fist. She tried to tilt her head to catch his gaze, and he pointedly looked away once more. With a sigh, she said, "I'm sorry, Seifer. Ma Dincht wanted to have it as soon as I woke up and...well, we couldn't tell her no."

"I get it."

"I'm sor—"

"Stop apologizing, I said I get it. Keep going."

Sensing that he was more upset than he wished to express at the moment, she pulled her hand away, and this time, he let her. After folding her hands in her lap, she did as he requested. "So, the funeral was held the first week after we returned. There's a new addition to the memorial in the quad that's dedicated to Zell. A lot of people showed up, though I suppose that isn't surprising. Zell was friends with practically everyone here,  _and_ elsewhere. President Laguna came to pay his respects and uh, obviously everyone from Balamb. Oh, Selphie and Irvine are here, too. Squall contacted her to let her know and...to ask if she wanted to be in charge of organizing things. You know how she can be."

Quistis glanced at him and when his expression didn't change, she backtracked. "Well, I guess you wouldn't know that very well, since you two haven't talked very much."

The room fell silent when she stopped talking, and Seifer didn't say anything in response, either. She picked at a loose thread hanging from the side of her pants as she cleared her throat, finishing with, "Since then, it's been a waiting game, and we've been hoping that you'd wake up and shed some light on what happened in Deling."

He still didn't respond, and she went to open her mouth to say something to him about his uncharacteristic silence, when his eyes swung around to focus on something behind her. When she followed his gaze, she spotted Squall leaning against the wall at the end of Seifer's hospital bed. She'd been so wrapped up in her story that she hadn't heard him come in.

Though the commander had his arms crossed, his expression was neutral, and he stared down at Seifer for a couple of seconds before he finally spoke. "Glad to see you're awake."

The corner of Seifer's mouth quirked upwards, and wryly, he responded, "Miss me, Puberty Boy?"

"I wouldn't  _ever_ admit that aloud," Squall quipped.

Seifer chuckled and Quistis moved to rise to her feet so that Squall could have the chair. He motioned for her to stay sitting, and said, "I can debrief him just fine from here. Don't stand on my account, Quistis. You look exhausted."

She raised an eyebrow at him. "I'm not sure whether to say thank you or feel insulted by that," she tried to joke. Unfortunately, the mood in the room wasn't entirely conducive for humor at the moment, and it fell flat.

Squall shrugged and mumbled, "Whatever," before he looked back at Seifer. "I know you haven't been up for long, and I wish we could wait to do this, but...we have to know what happened that night."

Seifer nodded. "I know."

With a return nod, Squall pulled out a small, portable recorder, and set it down on the end of the bed. He pressed a button, and once the quiet, mechanical whirring of the recorder started up, he motioned for Seifer to start talking.

Seifer sucked in a deep breath, and on the exhale, he began.

* * *

_Seifer pushed his legs to move faster, hoping to gain some ground on Zell and Marcus. Somehow, after leaving the house, Zell had passed him by, equally as anxious to catch the man they'd been chasing for the past week._

Shit! How the hell did Chickenwuss get so far ahead of me?

_He knew that Zell had incredible stamina, what with his martial arts and strict discipline. But he'd thought that his longer legs would give him the advantage. Clearly, Marcus was no slouch either, and he wasn't planning on rolling over and letting either of them catch him without working for it._

_When the freeway overpass came into view, Seifer knew that this was where it would go down. They couldn't allow Marcus to emerge on the other side, closer to the main heart of the city. It would be too easy to lose him in a crowd, which was present in that part of downtown, no matter the hour. That was likely Marcus' plan, and both he and Zell knew it; the martial artist sprinted forward, spurred on by a sudden burst of energy fueled by urgency._

_Zell and Marcus disappeared into the tunnel and, remembering Quistis at the last minute, Seifer skidded to a halt before whirling around. Because she hadn't been that far behind him, she nearly crashed into him._

_He swung her around and instructed, "Head up and over so you can meet us on the other side! I'll go after Zell and help him contain Marcus!"_

_She scrunched up her face in obvious disagreement, and the action marred her beautiful features. From the deep crease between her eyebrows, he knew she'd try to fight his decision because she didn't agree._

" _What? But you're both close-range! It would make more sense if I went after Zell and_ —"

_He had to force himself to resist the urge to shake her. Why, of all times, did she have to argue with him now? He was trying to save her from getting hurt_ — _or hell, even killed_ — _for Hyne's sake. Couldn't she just listen_   _to someone else's orders, for_ once _in her life?_

_Frustrated, he spat, "Just_ do _it, Quistis! I'm faster than you, so don't fight me on this! We don't have time!"_

_Instead of giving her a chance to argue with him, like the closet romantic that he was, he pulled her in and firmly pressed his lips against hers, just in case he never saw her again. Desperately, he thought,_ Let her make it through this…even if the rest of us don't.

_He pulled away and, without another word, he about-faced and sprinted into the tunnel, leaving a dumbfounded Quistis behind. All he could do was hope that she would listen, and not follow after him._

_Luckily, this particular tunnel was rather small; instead of the twenty-lane highway that ran above them, the tunnel only had two lanes: one going in either direction. On the sides of the road, fenced-in walkways ran along the length of the tunnel for pedestrians, and it was there that they pursued Marcus._

_He could see the back of Zell's head; the blond, gelled spikes of hair shot off in random directions, giving him an air of nonchalance_ ,  _though all that knew him personally knew that to be untrue. That was the whole reason Seifer called him "chickenwuss"_ — _his spikes resembled a chocobo's backside. He'd chuckled at the ridiculous hairdo in the past, but right now, he was glad for the easy visibility of it. Because of the late hour, the tunnel was minimally lit, and the sidewalks only had emergency lighting along the wall, closer to the ground. The dimness didn't allow for him to see too far in front of him._

_Unexpectedly, Zell screeched to a halt and tensed, throwing his fists out to the side in what Seifer recognized as his fighting stance. When he approached Zell, he could hear the martial artist shouting at Marcus to stand down._

" _There's nowhere to run, Marcus! Just give it up!" Zell yelled._

" _You really expect me to just lay down? To just give myself up after everything I've done to ensure that my plan wouldn't fail?" Marcus taunted in response._

_Slowly, Seifer stepped up behind Zell, trying to let him know that if he needed backup, he had it. However, he didn't want to set Marcus off and make him panic; fear made people do crazy things, and crazy and Marcus in one sentence was bound to end badly._

" _What was your plan, then?" Seifer called out. He had to do all that he could to distract Marcus, keep him talking. Maybe then, Quistis would have enough time to make it to the other side, and they'd have him pinned in. It'd be an easy catch from there._

_Marcus' eyes shifted to Seifer's taller form behind Zell. "You know the answer to that already. I remember you; you and the pretty blonde one visited my condo. I'm assuming as SeeDs that you found exactly what you needed to incriminate me."_

_With a nod, Seifer replied, "Why do it? I get the whole revenge thing, but planning to take out Laguna and aiming for Squall instead? Good way to get a one-way ticket to D-District, buddy. You couldn't have just let it go?"_

_Marcus' face contorted in anger when he heard what Seifer had said. "Let it go? Loire_ killed _my_ father.  _I expect as orphans you wouldn't understand how that would've felt_ — _to lose a parent like that… No. I couldn't just let that go. I grew up with no parents, no real home_ — _for Hyne's sake, I grew up in a military academy. I was basically born and bred to become a soldier. They sure as hell didn't give a shit about me. I was just another face, another number to them."_

_Zell piped up then and tried to reason with Marcus as he lowered his fists. "You don't think we don't know how that felt? Sure, we might not have known how it was to lose them out of the blue like that, but, we didn't have parents growing up, either. You know we're SeeDs; we understand what it was like growing up in a Garden. Heck, any of us could've gone down the same path as you and joined the military_ — _wouldn't have been much a stretch, right? But you don't have to do this, Marcus. You don't have to go through with something that'll ruin the rest of your life."_

_The entire time Zell had been talking, he'd slowly crept forward, closer to Marcus. Seifer made it a point to stand perfectly still, so that Marcus would only focus on Zell and what he was saying. After all, the martial artist was a hell of a better choice when it came to trying to negotiate with people._

_Apparently oblivious to Zell's encroachment, Marcus shook his head at Zell. "I've lived with the pain, and anger, and resentment since I was ten years old._ Ten _; I was a_ kid _. No kid deserves that. To hear that his dad isn't ever coming home. Sorry, I'm not about to just_ —"  _He looked over at Seifer again. In a quiet voice, he mocked,_  " _What was it you said? Let it go? Hm...yeah. I'm not about to just let it go."_

_He reached inside of his coat and when he drew his hand back out from the folds, he had his fingers wrapped tightly around a grenade. "From experience, I'm willing to bet you've sent the girl to the other side of the tunnel, right? Isn't that protocol? Trap the target and then try to negotiate your way out of things? I hate to break it to you both, but I'm not planning on going to D-District. It was either finish the plan, or take myself out of the game. If I can't have Leonhart or Loire, then I'll settle for you two."_

_Marcus smiled as he slowly lifted his thumb off the grenade pin_ — _Seifer thought it almost seemed like he was doing it slowly to toy with them. Zell whirled around, meeting Seifer's panicked gaze. "I trust you, Almasy. Take care of her," he said in a rush, causing Seifer to shake his head in confusion as his eyes darted back and forth between Zell and Marcus._

" _The fuck, Din_ — _OOMPH!" Zell had darted forward and landed a Mach Kick right in the center of Seifer's chest. He flew through the air, back the way they'd come, and when he landed on the ground fifty feet away, he swore to Hyne he felt a couple of ribs break._

_Pain spread outwards from the center of his chest, and he struggled to sit up, fully intent on yelling at Zell for sucker-kicking him out of nowhere. When he looked back down the walkway, Zell tackled Marcus, wrapping his arms around the other man before they hit the ground._

" _No! Ze—_ "

_Seifer never had a chance to finish his sentence. The grenade went off, but Marcus must've had more explosives on him than either of them had realized. His and Zell's bodies should've muffled the blast, but instead, a deafening boom shook the tunnel, and immediately after, a giant wave of fire and dark smoke barrelled towards Seifer. He lifted his arm in an attempt to shield his face. The last thing he remembered was the crushing weight of the tunnel collapsing in on itself._

* * *

By the time Seifer finished talking, neither Squall nor Quistis knew what to say. In fact, Quistis didn't trust her voice to work at all. Every single one of Zell's last words had sent a sharp spike of pain through her heart; the pain of losing someone she loved was still too fresh. Towards the end, she'd started crying again, but she was too scared to say anything. She was afraid that if she did, the dam would break, and she'd start hysterically sobbing all over again. In her opinion, she'd done far too much of that lately, and she was emotionally drained; she didn't have any desire to start the vicious cycle all over again, and especially not in front of Squall.

Not that she thought he'd care, but there were less than a handful of people who had seen her that vulnerable in the twenty-two years of her life. Back before the war, she'd tried to open up to Squall about losing her instructor's license, and the experience had been less than pleasant. Surprisingly, Seifer handled her crying much better than Squall ever had—and that was saying something.

Without a word, and at a lethargic pace, Squall reached down and shut off the recorder before tucking it back into his pocket. He met Seifer's grim gaze and nodded. To her surprise, he saluted Seifer, holding the position for a few seconds before he relaxed and glanced at Quistis. After that, he walked out of the infirmary.

Still feeling the oppressive weight of the silence in the room, Quistis didn't know what to say. She dropped her gaze to her hands where they lay in her lap, and stared at her upturned palms. What she'd gotten out of Seifer's recollection of Zell's final words, was that her friend had sacrificed himself to let Seifer live. If it hadn't been for Zell's foresight, and the careful choice of words he'd made in his final moments, she would have lain awake at night and wondered why he would make such a choice.

It'd never been a secret that he and Seifer had never been friends. On the best of the days, they still got into at least three or four arguments. So, for Zell to make the conscious decision to put Seifer out of harm's way, and sacrifice himself to contain the blast, proved that his selflessness had no bounds. It was like he'd already had that plan in mind when they'd raced into the tunnel, and by choosing those exact words to relay to Seifer, he'd known how Quistis would handle the news afterwards.

Just like his ability to make her laugh posthumously, even in death, he was her greatest friend.

At that thought, tears streamed down Quistis' cheeks again and Seifer reached out to brush his fingers against her arm. She glanced up at him in a silent question, and he laid his hand out for her, palm up. With a grateful smile, she placed her hand in his and the comforting warmth radiated upwards through her arm. Neither of them said anything. They didn't have to.

Seifer wasn't prone to crying, but she could tell that he was upset because he kept clenching and unclenching his jaw, just like he'd been doing earlier. He swallowed, roughly, before clearing his throat. "Am I a dick for calling him an idiot?"

His coarse statement hadn't been what Quistis was expecting and she swiveled her head around to stare at him. "Who?  _Zell_?"

"Yeah."

Flabbergasted, she continued to stare at him with her mouth open. "Why would he be an idiot? He saved your  _life_!"

"Tch, if he'd just...I could've helped him, you know? But he didn't even let me have the choice. He just...made it for me and then sucker-kicked me out of the way!"

"He was trying to keep you alive, Seifer! That was probably the only thing he could think of to do."

"Yeah, and that's what pisses me off! That's on me now! His death, his Hyne-damned blood is  _on me_. It's  _my fault_ 'cause I didn't even get to try, Quistis, and what the hell am I supposed to do with that? How the hell am I supposed to live the rest of my life knowing that that's hangin' over me?" Seifer exclaimed.

"You do exactly that: you  _live_   _it_. That's what Zell would have wanted you to do; that's exactly why he made that sacrifice!"

"Yeah, well, I didn't ask him to get killed for my sake."

At that, the heated rush of pure anger surged through Quistis and she shot to her feet, yanking her hand out of Seifer's grasp. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you almost sound  _ungrateful_ for what he did."

With a rough shake of his head, Seifer scoffed. "Oh, do I sound ungratefuI? Maybe I fuckin' am. I didn't want his death on my conscience; Hyne knows I don't need any more shit weighing on me, and enough people hate me as it is."

"You. Are. Unbelievable," Quistis gasped, her chest heaving. "I can't...I cannot believe you just said that. Do you even know how selfish that sounds?"

He didn't answer, and that  _damned_ muscle in his cheek was twitching again. In the red haze of her anger, she wanted to claw at it—to hurt him as much as she was hurting inside right now. When he didn't respond to her previous statement, in a shaky voice, she said, "I sat there, in  _that_ chair, praying to Hyne that you would wake up. For  _three damned weeks_ , I cried myself to sleep—what little sleep I could even get—thinking that I would never hear your voice again, or see the way you look at me when you don't think I'm looking. Do you know how long I've wanted that, Seifer? I've wanted something like Squall and Rinoa have for as long as I can remember, and I almost lost that. I almost lost  _you_."

Seifer interrupted heatedly and said, "We're  _not_  them, Quistis! We won't ever be them! Why are you trying to compare us?"

Frustrated, she wrung her hands in the air. "That's not the  _point,_ Seifer! My point is that, for the last three weeks, I've felt like I was dying right along with you, and after losing Zell, it would've killed me to hear that heart rate monitor flatline. That's why I sat at your bedside, holding your limp hand as tightly as I could; hoping with everything in me that you'd open your eyes again."

By this point, she couldn't stem the tide, and her tears were flowing freely down her cheeks. "After all that we've been through—our childhood, the  _war_ , the mission,  _this_ —you're telling me that you wish Zell  _hadn't_  given us a second chance?"

Finally, Seifer looked away from her and stared at the infirmary wall. She stood there for a second, giving him a chance to say something—anything—in return. When he didn't, she threw her arms out to the side and yelled, "Is it, Seifer? Is that honestly what you're saying to me, right now?"

"YES! Yes it is, Quistis! Damn it!" he bellowed, pounding his fists against the hospital bed so hard that the headboard rattled.

She reeled back in shock, her mouth hanging open. "Do you actually mean that?" she whispered.

He leaned his head back on the pillow and his eyes slid shut. With a sigh that sounded as if the entire world rested on his shoulders, he dragged his hand down his face and said, "Fuck me, but...I do."

She took a step back and stumbled, her movements clumsy from the buildup of all the emotional trauma over the past day. When her back bumped up against the wall, she stumbled, grabbing onto the railing that ran along the wall like it was her lifeline.

The fire that fueled her anger drained out of her, and she sagged against the wall. She stared at him, hoping, praying that he would take it all back. When he didn't, she scoffed and said, "You know what? Fuck  _you_ , Seifer."

As she staggered to the other end of the room, that little voice she'd been trying to ignore from before came back, whispering that maybe, just maybe, he'd call out to her and ask her to stop, to not leave; that he'd apologize for what he'd said.

But he didn't. And so, she walked out of the infirmary, and didn't look back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I PROMISE IT DOES NOT END HERE. IT WILL END HAPPY. The epilogue is finished and I'm currently revising, so I'll let you guys process for a couple of days, and it will be up sometime this weekend ;)
> 
> As always, huge thanks to Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest for beta-reading so quickly. I appreciate your guys' thoroughness and dedication to this story!
> 
> Thanks to all who reads, comments and leaves kudos :3


	17. Epilogue - Part I

_Two and a half months later._

 

One month after their argument, Seifer left Garden. According to Cid, he was still a contracted agent, but he'd requested leave for an indefinite period of time. Considering what had happened during the Esthar mission, Cid hadn't hesitated to grant it to him.

When she'd found out in passing, she'd claimed it didn't matter to her either way. But she knew that wasn't the truth. If it was, she wouldn't have snuck into the Headmaster's office a week ago, and broken into his filing cabinet to find the address on file for Seifer. She also wouldn't have gone all the way into town, gone to the house in question, and spied on it for two or three hours, waiting to see if he'd come home. She _also_ wouldn't have asked his elderly neighbor if she'd seen Seifer in the past month—no, she hadn't seen that "nice young man who always helps me with my groceries." Quistis had to wonder if they were talking about the same person—before heading back to Garden. As much as she hated to admit it, even to herself, she was disappointed.

Since their falling out in the infirmary, they hadn't spoken a single word to each other. Bribing Dr. Kadowaki into silence—though the doctor had claimed she wouldn't have said anything either way—Quistis only visited Seifer when he was asleep, just to make sure that he was recovering properly. She was still furious with him, and didn't expect that anger to fade anytime soon, but that didn't mean she didn't love him. Despite all of the hurtful things they'd said to each other, she wanted him to heal, to be whole again, to be the Seifer she knew from before. Even though they didn't speak, she could tell how antsy he was, having been confined to a hospital bed for so long; he twitched relentlessly in his sleep.

Since she no longer spent every waking moment at Seifer's bedside, she'd returned to her usual routine: waking up at 0500, going for a run around the school's grounds, then showering and heading up to the third floor for the day. Somehow, over the past month, she'd ended up falling into the habit of visiting the memorial every morning, at the end of her run. It was there that she sat now, staring up at the ceiling. She leaned forward and draped her arms over the metal railing, taking occasional sips from her water bottle as she cooled down.

Ever since her days as a cadet, she'd always gone for runs in the early hours of the morning when no one else was up, long before the sun rose. It helped clear her mind of the troubles of the day before, and it was almost as if she could feel the stress leaving her with every step. Lately, she knew that picking up her old routine was both a manifestation of her avoiding what had happened between her and Seifer, and the desperate need for some structure in her life again.

As her breathing slowed, she gazed out at the beach off in the distance, waiting for the sun to peek over the horizon. The quad had the best view of the sunrise, and she wondered if that was part of the reason she'd subconsciously made this her last stop during her runs. Per ritual, she looked back over her shoulder at the sparkling white stone behind her, raising her bottle in greeting to Zell.

When she faced forward again, the sound of a boot heel scuffing against the linoleum floor startled her, and she twisted her head to the left. Bright canary yellow flooded her vision, and she leaned away from the offending brilliance, closing her eyes to let them recover.

"...Good morning, Selphie."

The bubbly brunette sat down, leaning over and nudging Quistis with her shoulder in greeting before sliding her legs underneath the railing. She started swinging them back and forth, humming under her breath. They sat there with only Selphie's humming to fill the silence for the next fifteen minutes, and it wasn't until the sun's glowing rays painted the sky various hues of pink, lavender and pale blue, that Selphie spoke.

"Mornin', Quisty."

Quistis let out a soft chuckle and asked, "How did you know I'd be here?"

"You've been here every morning for like, the past month. It wasn't like it was hard to figure out."

"I'm that predictable?"

Selphie looked at Quistis out of the corner of her eye and admitted, "Actually, I came here about three days ago because I wanted to tell Zell something, and I spotted you sitting here."

"Oh? You little cheater," Quistis teased, nudging Selphie back. The brunette let out a giggle and they faced forward again, watching a flock of birds fly by the window.

A good, solid minute passed before Selphie piped up again. "So why _do_ you come here every morning, anyway?"

Quistis' eyes followed the birds until they flew out of sight, and it was then that she let out a sigh. "At first, it kind of just happened. I'd be finishing up my run and somehow, I'd end up sitting here to wind down. After a week or so, I figured I'd make it a permanent part of the routine. It's kind of nice, just letting my thoughts roam. I get to unwind and—" She turned around to glance at Zell's memorial again. "—I get to talk to Zell, so...I don't know. It's nice."

"Wait, you're not the one bringin' him hot dogs, are you?" Selphie accused, a playful tone in her voice.

"...I might be."

"I knew it! The cleaning crew has been getting so mad because there've been ants lately! Oooh, I'm tellin' on you, Quisty!"

"But you'd deprive him of his beloved hot dogs, and then where would he be?" Quistis said with a smile.

Selphie let out another giggle and looked back over her shoulder at the memorial stone. "Yeah, good point. I wouldn't be a very good friend if I did that, huh?"

The girls sobered up and Quistis thought she heard Selphie sniffle, before the brunette laid her head down on Quistis' shoulder. In a quiet, almost childlike voice, Selphie whispered, "I miss him, Quisty."

Quistis' eyes stung with the sudden onslaught of tears, and she mumbled, "I miss him, too."

"Have you talked to him since?"

"To who? Zell? I'm here every morni—"

Selphie interrupted her with a roll of her eyes. "No, duh, not Zell. Seifer."

At the mention of the very man she'd been trying _not_ to think about for the past two months, Quistis involuntarily cringed. "Uh, no, I haven't."

Selphie lifted her head and stared up at Quistis with wide, accusing eyes. Somehow, Selphie had always been able to make Quistis feel guilty with that stare, and she broke eye contact, choosing to looking out at the beach again.

"Quisty…"

With a sigh, Quistis threw her hands up in the air. "He _left_ , Selphie. He left after he got better, and he hasn't bothered to talk to me since, so why should I have to be the one who makes the first move?"

"Aren't you guys past that, though? Caring about who makes the first move, I mean. Rin told me about everything that happened during the mission, and how she could hear you two all the way down the hall—"

Quistis held up her hand and motioned for her friend to stop talking. "Please, Selphie, I don't want to hear details from you. It's bad enough that Rinoa told you, let alone that she could hear us."

Selphie shook her head, causing the ends of her brown curls to sway back and forth. "I don't get it. You love him, don't you? At least, it seems like you love him. Like, the way I love Irvy."

She stared at her hands, and remembered the way it felt to have Seifer hold them. It made her feel safe, protected, and even though she knew she didn't need that, it had felt wonderful all the same. "I do," she whispered.

"So go tell him that!"

"He _knows_ that, Selphie. He left because he blames himself for Zell's death. That's something I can't help him with."

"Bullshit!"

Shocked by her friend's uncharacteristic word choice, Quistis faced Selphie with her mouth hanging open. "...What...did you just say?"

"Sorry, I just wanted to get your attention. Really though, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard, Quisty. It's _not_ his fault; Zell chose to do what he did so you guys could live happily ever after! He knew that you guys needed each other, and now, he's dead—" Selphie started crying then, and her last words were interspersed with harsh sobs. "—and you guys aren't together. That's stupid! That means it was for nothing."

"I know, Selphie. I tried to tell him that, but he wouldn't listen to me," Quistis mumbled.

"Well, go _make_ him listen! You're Quistis Trepe, for crying out loud! He's an idiot for letting you go!"

That made Quistis laugh, and she reached out to grasp Selphie's hand. "Thanks, Selph."

Selphie opened her mouth to expand on her opinion of Seifer, but the chime of the announcement system interrupted her.

"Selphie and Quistis, wherever the heck you are right now, get to the infirmary! Seriously, right now!" Irvine's voice instructed.

"Why is _Irvine_ using the intercom?" Quistis questioned aloud.

A loud gasp came from Selphie and she scrambled back from the railing, shooting to her feet with a wide grin on her face. "The _baby_! I bet Rinoa's having the baby!"

Quistis let out a matching gasp, and after she stood up, Selphie grabbed her arm and proceeded to drag her out of the quad. Within minutes, they were stumbling into the infirmary, where Squall, Irvine, and Dr. Kadowaki were crowded into the private patient room.

Irvine turned at the sound of the door opening, and when he spotted Selphie, he crossed the room in three strides, lifting her up and spinning her around the room. "Sephie, they're havin' a baby!"

"I _knew_ it was time! A mini Squall and Rinoa is gonna be the cutest thing!" Selphie squealed.

Irvine set his girlfriend back down on the floor and crushed her against his body in a bear hug. "That's gonna be us in nine months, babe! They're gonna grow up together!"

"Wait, say that again?" Quistis asked as she stepped forward.

Sheepishly, Selphie turned around and grabbed Irvine's hand. "That's actually what I was gonna tell Zell a few days ago...if it's a boy, we wanted to name it after him and...we were gonna tell you after, I swear!"

A surge of excitement rushed through her, and, figuring today was a good day for uncharacteristic behavior, she stepped forward and wrapped her arms around the both of them. "I'm happy for you guys."

"Thanks, Quisty! Let's go see Rin!" Selphie exclaimed, before skipping into the patient room.

They trailed after the brunette, and when they walked into the room, Quistis saw Squall standing beside the bed, holding Rinoa's hand and looking rather pale. Rinoa was sitting up in bed with her hand resting on her extremely rounded belly, a gentle smile on her face. As always, she looked ethereal, and the glow of impending motherhood only enhanced her natural beauty.

"Hey guys," she greeted in a quiet voice. Quistis thought she sounded slightly nervous, but they wouldn't have been able to guess that from just looking at her. If at all, she just looked extremely excited.

A chorus of greetings sounded from everyone in the room except for Squall and Dr. Kadowaki, who had already been there for a little while. The doctor patted Rinoa's leg and said, "You're dilated to a four, so you've still got some time. I'll come back to check on you periodically. Just to let everyone know, once she reaches about an eight or a nine, I'm going to kick you all out. But for now, you're fine to stay."

Everyone mumbled their agreement, and Irvine moved to let Dr. Kadowaki back into the main room of the infirmary. Selphie bounded over to the other side of the bed, and grabbed Rinoa's other hand. "Are you so so so excited, Rin?"

"Well, I _am_ excited but, I have to admit that I'm pretty scared, too," Rinoa replied, with a quick glance up at Squall.

"Scared? Why? Have there been complications?" Quistis asked, suddenly worried.

"No, no. It's just...well...there's not much history to compare to, as far as sorceresses giving birth and, if it's a girl, we don't really know how my powers will affect her. We've tried not to worry too much about it, but, laying in bed and going through labor for nine hours kind of doesn't help…" Rinoa explained before she trailed off. A sheepish expression swept across her face and she added, "Sorry, guys. I would've called for you all sooner but, it didn't make sense to have everyone sitting here for so long, just waiting."

Quistis looked at Squall who nodded imperceptibly at her. She briefly clenched her jaw before looking at Rinoa again with a smile. "Well, you have us. Just concentrate on delivering a healthy baby, and we'll figure out the rest later. There's no sense in worrying yourself over something beyond your control."

As if to prove Quistis' point was right, Selphie nodded dramatically and squeezed Rinoa's hand. "Quisty's right! We've got your back!"

Rinoa let out a light laugh. "Thanks, guys."

The door slid open again, and Cid and Matron poked their heads into the room. Matron offered a timid smile in greeting, and Rinoa responded in kind before waving them in. Irvine and Quistis shuffled to the side in order for them to all fit in the cramped space, and Matron wrapped her fingers around the base of the bed.

"How are things going?" she asked, with another heartwarming smile. It was as if having Matron in the room reassured everyone, and the underlying current of fear seemed to dissipate; even Squall managed to form a tiny smile at her presence.

Rinoa moved her hand up and down along her belly and replied, "Good, so far. Dr. Kadowaki says we've still got a ways to go. My contractions have been coming sooner though, and—" She winced as another one rippled through her, and after she caught her breath, added, "I'm pretty sure she's right. The epidural helped, but they're definitely not fun to experience."

Matron let out a nervous chuckle. "I wish so badly that I had advice for you, Rinoa, but…"

At that, the group let out a collective chuckle. Selphie pulled over a stool and plopped down at the end of Rinoa's bed, next to Matron, while Irvine leaned up against the wall beside the medical equipment. Quistis decided to join Cid where he stood behind Matron, and over the next few hours, they all chatted back and forth about benign things. Every so often, Dr. Kadowaki would pop into the room and check in with Rinoa on how she was feeling.

At this point, it was all a waiting game. Over the next little bit, Rinoa became less and less talkative. Quistis noticed that she started wincing more often, and Squall glanced at the door, seemingly torn between waiting for Rinoa to say something, and running to grab Dr. Kadowaki now.

To save him the trouble, she piped up and asked, "Squall, is it time?"

Instead of giving him a chance to respond, Rinoa answered, and with another wince, said, "I'm fine. I don't think it's _time_ time."

With concern etched on his face, Squall looked down at the soon-to-be mother. "Are you sure, Rin? It sounds like it's getting more painful…"

"Yes, I—" She gripped his hand so hard, that it almost looked like he wanted to pull away afterwards. "I'm _fine_."

Helpless, Squall looked up at Quistis, who nodded in agreement. Without a word, she turned and headed out of the room to grab Dr. Kadowaki.

"Well, time or not, you're in good hands, at least. We keep Kadowaki around for a reason!" Cid joked.

Quistis and Dr. Kadowaki walked back into the room, and the doctor joked, "Thanks for the ringing endorsement, Headmaster. Okay, everybody, time to clear out. Except you, Squall, obviously. You're welcome to stay if you want to be present, and if Rinoa wants you here."

Squall winced as Rinoa squeezed his hand in a firm death grip. "He stays."

"All right, then. Out, you guys, out!" Dr. Kadowaki stated, herding everyone out of the room by waving her hands at them until the door slid shut once more.

Over the next hour or so, the group milled about the room, chatting idly while waiting for things to actually start. While Quistis was speaking to Irvine about their time in Trabia, raised voices starting coming from the room. The group turned and stared at the door, anxious to find out what was going on. From the way things sounded, it didn't seem like Dr. Kadowaki or the soon-to-be parents were panicking, but it was nerve-wracking nonetheless.

When nothing ended up happening, they picked their conversations back up. They'd only been talking for about fifteen more minutes when they heard Dr. Kadowaki urging Rinoa to start pushing. A strained grunt followed, and a few seconds later, Rinoa was encouraged to push again.

Irvine stood and started pacing, obviously frazzled by the tense atmosphere. He kept glancing over at Selphie, as if wondering how she was going to possibly survive such an ordeal. Rinoa was slender, yes, but Selphie was the very epitome of petite, and Quistis didn't blame the cowboy for being worried.

If she had to be frank, this sounded like an absolute nightmare.

One of Rinoa's subsequent grunts sounded more like an agonized groan, and they all spun around to stare at the door again. Quistis crossed her arms tightly over her chest, and started tapping her finger against the back of her bicep in rapid succession. Irvine's anxiety had migrated to her, and she was tempted to stand up and start pacing, too.

Another torturous groan drifted into the room and this time, they heard a low murmur come from Squall afterwards—he was likely trying to sooth Rinoa's distress. Apparently, it only ended up irritating Rinoa, because suddenly, she shouted, " _Damn you_ , Squall! Don't you dare say it's going to be all right when this is all _your_ fault!"

Squall didn't reply and, when Quistis glanced across the room and met Irvine's eyes, they started chortling at Rinoa's outburst. Despite the seriousness of the entire situation, she had to admit that it was highly amusing hearing something that fiery come from the normally so kind and loving sorceress.

The repeated commands from Dr. Kadowaki and the responding grunts of effort from Rinoa continued on, and a half an hour later at 6:57 in the morning, Squall and Rinoa's first child was born.

When the baby's first cries were heard, the entire group breathed a sigh of relief, and Quistis spotted Matron wiping away a few tears. She rose to her feet, and after walking over to the only mother she'd truly known—she'd never thought of the Trepes as her parents—she wrapped her arms around the older woman's slender frame. With a quiet chuckle, Matron returned the gesture, and they stood there for a few seconds, reveling in the joyous atmosphere.

After about a half an hour—much to the group's impatient dismay—the door to the private room slid open and revealed Dr. Kadowaki, who was drying off her hands with a paper towel. "You can come and meet the new Miss Leonhart, now."

Selphie let out a gasp and jumped up and down with her arms in the air. "Woohoo! A girl!"

As they moved into the room, Dr. Kadowaki forced each of them to wash their hands thoroughly at the sink over on the opposite end of the bed. Once Quistis had dried hers, she meandered over to stand by Squall, gazing down at the tightly-wrapped bundle of cloth in his arms.

"Oh…" Quistis breathed when she laid eyes on the tiny baby. "She's _precious_ , Squall."

He didn't respond, but for once, Quistis knew it wasn't because he didn't want to. It was because he couldn't. When the baby cooed and peeked her head out of the blanket, Rinoa reached her arms up. Squall handed his daughter over to her mother, after cradling her head for a brief second.

Selphie, who was sitting on a chair at the end of the bed, laid her hand down on her forearms as she watched Rinoa with her newborn. "She's the cutest thing I've ever seen," she whispered.

At that, Irvine nudged her with his elbow and said, "'Till we have ours, yeah?"

Selphie responded by sitting up and smacking him on the butt. "Duh! That's a given, ya dummy!"

The group chuckled and slowly trickled out of the room, giving the new parents some alone time with their daughter. Quistis was the last to leave, and as she stood in the doorway, she paused and looked back at Squall and Rinoa. They painted quite the picture; Squall was leaning down over his ladies, gazing down at Raine with a tender expression on his face. Rinoa was rocking Raine back and forth, humming a soft tune to soothe their daughter.

A wave of affection and love swept through Quistis, and she smiled fondly at them. After everything the couple had been through, they deserved to be happy, and she was elated that they'd finally gotten the chance. With this new life, she could sense that the future would be different. Now, Squall and Rinoa had a new reason to fight. In only a short while, Selphie and Irvine would as well. Quistis closed her eyes, remembering what Zell had died for: her reason to live.

Though she was confused as to what her own future might hold, she found that she still felt renewed with hope. With that revelation in mind, she stepped out of the room and the door slid shut behind her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was on the fence about deleting this scene per one of my beta's suggestions. However, I felt like it was really important to showcase not only how Quistis had overcome the emotionally difficult first chapters, but how the group would always be tight-knit. I couldn't imagine everyone not being present for Squall and Rinoa's first baby being born, and that's kind of why I chose to keep this half of the epilogue.
> 
> I based this entire scene on my experience of being present for nearly all of my best friend's labor, and I hope that, despite the fact that this might not have meshed with your experiences, you guys still enjoyed seeing their baby come into the world :)
> 
> My usual "credits" will be in the second half, but I wanted to thank Arenoptara, Strings805, and LaylaEvercrest for picking this epilogue apart with me.


	18. Epilogue - Part II

_There now, steady love, so few come and don't go_

_Will you won't you, be the one I always know?_

_When I'm losing my control, the city spins around_

_You're the only one who knows, you slow it down_

 

_It's always have and never hold_

_You've begun to feel like home yeah_

_What's mine is yours to leave or take_

_What's mine is yours to make your own_

 

_The Fray - Look After You_

* * *

  _One month later._

Quistis walked out of the Headmaster’s office, intent on heading back to her dorm to get ready for the day. Rinoa had asked her to watch their daughter for an hour or two this morning after her daily run, just so the couple could get some sleep. Apparently, newborns weren’t very prone to sleeping through the night, and her poor parents were walking around with permanent bags under their eyes.

So, after a couple of hours, she’d handed off baby Raine to Squall, swathed tightly in a blanket in her little carrier. For a one-month old baby, she was rather easy to take care of. She slept most of the time, and even when she was awake, she didn’t do much more than coo and gaze at her surroundings. To Quistis’ surprise, she found that she enjoyed babysitting Raine; it was more soothing than she’d thought it would’ve been. Of course, that might’ve been because she had the option to give her back at the end of the day.

Before she’d walked out, Squall had pulled her aside and whispered, “Hey. Seifer’s back in Balamb.”

She’d pulled away and raised an eyebrow at Squall, before asking, “And why did you think I would want to know that?”

He shrugged. “Selphie told me to tell you. And after that, Rin suggested that you’d want to know.”

_Oh, I just_ love _my friends_. “I see. I appreciate you telling me, Squall, but...I don’t care.”

“Okay, whatever. Tell them I told you then, just to get them off my back.”

At that, she laughed, and waved goodbye over her shoulder as she walked out of the office. She’d brushed it off as useless information, and claimed that she didn’t care, but on the elevator ride back down to the lobby, she couldn’t help wondering where he had been the past few months, and if he was doing okay. They hadn’t spoken since he’d left Garden—actually, even before that—and despite the fact that there was still an underlying sense of anger at his last words to her, she _did_ care.

Slowly, she trudged down the steps from the elevator, lost in her thoughts. Out of the corner of her left eye, she saw the bright glow of the sunlight coming in through the front entrance as it reflected off of the highly polished floors. Entranced, she gazed out the doors, her thoughts winding back to that day in the infirmary.

What had been going through his mind? How had he justified his decision to ignore what Zell had done? In the end, how could he throw that selfless act, and _them_ , away? It would be so easy just to head to town and see if he _had_ come back, to get some answers.

With a heavy sigh, she sank down onto the bench opposite from the quad. Deep down, she knew that they _needed_ to talk, for both their sakes. She’d never been the type of person to let things lay where they’d fallen, and when it came to their last conversation, things had fallen quite badly. On that note, Seifer had never been the type of guy who apologized freely; most of the time, apologies had to be wrenched from him, like pulling a Wendigo from its natural habitat; the Wendigo refused to go without a fight, and inevitably, the wrangler would end up black and blue with bruises from head to toe.

Besides, even if she did get an apology from him, he wouldn’t have meant it.

Over the past three months, she’d thought about their fight every single day. Each word they’d thrown at each other was a sharpened dagger that found its mark; they’d always been exceptionally good at doing that. Looking back on the argument, she knew there were things she could’ve said or done differently, but would Seifer have reacted any other way?

It might’ve been petty, but she still insisted that it hadn’t been her fault. Yes, the escalation of things could be pinned on her, but he had been the one who had given up on them. He hadn’t said goodbye to her when he’d left Garden, he hadn’t apologized for their fight, and over the past three months, he’d never once tried to contact her. _That_ irritated her the most. Was a simple phone call so difficult to make? Had a final “goodbye” been so hard to say?

To be honest, she had to admit that she couldn’t blame him for feeling the way he did. He’d always had the tendency to blame himself for things, whether they were actually his fault or not. Because of that, it stood to reason that he’d feel guilty over Zell’s death—especially considering his role during the war. He’d been the enemy; they’d been on the winning side of history. For someone like Zell—someone Seifer had never been close to, and who was considered a hero to many—to choose to give up his life in order for Seifer to live? That was hard for many people to reconcile with, let alone Seifer himself.

However, even though she understood _why_ he’d been so upset that day, she couldn’t justify the fact that he’d chosen to throw them away. To her, Seifer had tossed Zell’s selfless act out the window simply because he hadn’t agreed with it. And _then_ , had never bothered to act on it afterwards, considering he hadn’t reached out to her since.

Though her anger had dimmed to a tiny ember since the last time she’d seen him, those thoughts caused the flame to flare up again. She clenched her jaw and took a deep breath in through her nose, trying to fight the reaction that seemed to happen every time she thought about their last argument. She couldn’t afford to fly off the rails every time she thought about him from here on out. If at all, she needed to go and talk to him in order to _move on_ from this, to clear the air about how he’d really felt and where they were going to go from here.

She needed answers, and now, she had her chance.

Filled with mixed emotions of anger over the unknown, and anxiety to see him despite that anger, she shot to her feet. Spurred on by a surge of emotion, she ran out of the lobby as fast as she could, foregoing a car and choosing to run to town in the hopes that it would help her focus on her goal.

_He’s going to talk to me, whether he wants to or not_ , she stated to herself.

Soon enough, she flew past the gas station attendant and onto Balamb’s main street. Pausing on the side of the road to catch her breath, she braced her hands on her knees and gasped for air. Once her breathing had slowed to a relatively normal rate, she jogged around the corner, past the hotel. Seifer’s house was at the end of the connecting road, where a small row of bungalows had been built in recent years to compensate for the growing population. Cid had picked a rather strategic location to hide his “third-party consultant”—it was as out of the way as you could get in Balamb.

When she came around the lamp on the end of his street, the sight of him caused her to come to a complete stop. She didn’t know why she was caught off guard. After all, she’d come here with the sole purpose to see him. Somehow, she was still surprised that he was really there, standing so casually on the front lawn. Even from five houses down, she knew it was him.

Her surge of anger from earlier dissipated slightly, and she watched him move with a confidence that only he had ever been able to command. She’d recognize that sure posture anywhere, even hidden under the bulky sweater that he was currently wearing. He’d gotten his hair cut, and it was now at the same length that it had been during the war. He was directing a group of men who were holding cardboard boxes into the house, yelling and waving his hands in the air when one of them almost dropped one on the ground.

To her surprise, Fujin and Raijin were standing opposite from him, supervising the proceedings. She hadn’t seen them since the first night they’d run into each other at the bar, and though he’d mentioned them occasionally afterwards, they hadn’t spoken of his two closest friends too often. Seifer was obviously agitated at the movers, and she let out a chuckle in response to his obvious distress. The sound must’ve carried, because Fujin glanced over and spotted Quistis standing down the street.

Her first instinct was to hide, but the streetlamp was the only thing around. Instead, she shrugged, and opted to wave hesitantly in Fujin’s direction instead. After all, isn’t that why she’d come all this way? She couldn’t back down now simply because she hadn’t expected to have an audience. Even though they were farther down the road, Quistis could tell that Fujin turned to Seifer and said something, because shortly afterwards, he whirled around.

Raijin started barking commands at the movers, and the group of men scurried back to the truck, before starting it up and pulling away from the curb. He and Fujin then moved inside the house. The entire time this was all happening, Seifer just stood there, staring at Quistis. Realizing that she’d have to be the one who made the first move, and figuring she had already come all this way, Quistis walked towards him.

The entire time she was approaching, he didn’t budge an inch. Eventually, when she stood just in front of him, he blinked, as if he didn’t believe she was really there. After a couple of seconds of him staring at her _some more_ , which was slightly uncomfortable, his eyes flickered down to her running shoes before they flew back up to her face.

Finally, Seifer questioned, “The hell are you wearing?”

Hearing the sound of his voice again made her think of the day he’d woken up from his coma, and she sucked in a shaky breath before letting it out in an equally nervous laugh. “I, uh—I was running.”

She cleared her throat, fighting her sudden bout of nerves, and he blinked at her again before lifting his hand up towards her face. At the last second, he dropped his arm, and she reached up to tuck the strand of hair he’d been reaching for behind her ear. Like only Seifer could, his impending touch had caused both nerves and a swell of anger to rise up in her. If he thought it was so easy to just _touch_ her, and all was forgiven, then he’d thought wrong. Though it was good to see him—to see that he was in fact, okay—looking into his eyes had pulled her ire back to the surface. In an attempt to avoid that line of thought, she turned towards the house, crossing her arms over her chest. The air was charged with tension, and she cleared her throat before attempting to break the ice.

“So, you live here, then?” she asked. She hadn’t meant to, but that had come across a lot harder than she’d intended. Of course, she _knew_ this was his house—she’d been here only a week ago. With a surreptitious glance at his neighbor’s house, she hoped that the elderly woman wouldn’t come out and recognize her.

“Uh, yeah,” Seifer mumbled. He still sounded like he was in shock that she was actually here, and they were talking like nothing had happened. “Cid put me up here when I first started, uh, helpin’ him out. I’ve been gone since...you know. I just got back today, but I can show you around, if you want.”

Quistis shrugged and said, “Sure.” Figuring she couldn’t be the only one who felt the awkward tension in the air, she thought he was likely trying to stall the inevitable “talk” he had to know was coming. Besides, the house was gorgeous, and she was genuinely curious to see what it looked like on the inside. Whether they talked now or after the tour, it didn’t really matter. He _would_ talk.

“Oh. It’s kind of messy right now,” he admitted as he rubbed the back of his neck. “The movers were throwing boxes left and right, but, yeah. Come on in.”

He headed up the walkway, and she suppressed a smile at his obvious discomfort. Considering his response to her acceptance of the tour, he likely hadn’t expected her to say yes. Well, that was fine with her. If she had to make him squirm before he apologized, then all the better.

The front room was pretty spacious, with plenty of room for a full-sized couch and a loveseat. There was a fireplace with a beautiful wood mantle against the far wall, and in front of it were piles upon piles of boxes. To the right of the fireplace was a wide archway that led into the kitchen, where Fujin and Raijin were standing. They waved when the pair entered the house, and hesitantly, Quistis waved back. Seifer pointed in their direction, stating rather obviously that that room was the kitchen, before leading her down a long hallway.

They passed a staircase with an elaborately carved balustrade, and Quistis gazed upwards, wondering if he’d show her the upstairs as well. For some reason, she’d always had the impression that the second floor in a home was the person’s private space, only open by invitation. Seifer had always been a rather secretive individual; he never offered up too much in a conversation, and sometimes, he’d dodge answering a question directly if the answer contained information he didn’t wish to share. Considering the way things had ended between them, she wouldn’t be surprised if he left that floor out of the tour.

At the end of the hall, another archway opened up to the dining area. From the way he spoke of the house, Seifer was obviously proud of the space. Quistis found it odd that he’d mentioned how Cid had “put him up”, which clearly indicated that Cid paid for his housing. It was strange that Seifer was proud of something that someone else paid for; unless he’d meant that he paid for the cost of housing, from the funds that he received _from_ Cid. Again, that was a rather personal question, and considering the state of their relationship—or lack of it—she didn’t think she was entitled to ask him something like that.

There was a door off to the side of the dining room, and Quistis gestured to it with her chin as she asked, “Where does that lead?”

Seifer followed her gaze and nonchalantly replied, “Oh, it’s a sunroom. Or at least, that’s what Fujin tells me. I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna do with a sunroom but, hey, I have one.” He jerked his head back towards the staircase. “Let’s head upstairs.”

That surprised her. Perhaps they _weren’t_ on the same page regarding the way things had gone between them the last time they’d seen each other. She could admit that she wasn’t as angry as she’d thought she’d be, upon seeing him again. Yes, there was still that resentment towards him lurking under the surface, but it was nowhere near the level that it’d been at three months ago. On the contrary, he didn’t seem to be upset with her in the slightest, and that disparity threw her off.

She followed him up the stairs, and when they reached the second floor landing, he went left through the open doorway that was at the top of the steps. She moved to do the same, but he’d paused in the doorway, and she had to pull back abruptly to avoid colliding into him.

“So this is a spare room, but I think I’m going to turn it into an office, or something. You know, to study the mission materials and other shit that I get from Cid,” Seifer explained.

“ _You’re_ going to study mission materials?”

“Hey, says the girl who didn’t even pay attention when we were reviewing said materials on the Ragnarok,” he threw back.

Again, she fought to suppress a smile. This time, he caught her, and the corner of his lips quirked upwards in amusement. When the moment passed, Seifer cleared his throat and brushed past her, causing her to suck in a breath at his overwhelming proximity. However irritated she might be, she couldn’t deny her body’s reaction to him.

Seifer made his way down the hall above the staircase, the one that led in the opposite direction. He walked the entire way into the next room with sure steps, but once she stepped into the room after him, he shuffled in place, apparently feeling unsure about something.

This room was mostly oval in shape, with an angled window seat in the alcove across the way. Golden rays of sunshine filtered in through the picturesque stained-glass windows, and she could see the particles of dust floating in the beams of light; it almost looked like the air was glittering. There wasn’t much furniture in the room yet—just a tall four-poster bed that had been pushed up against the right wall, which was surrounded by more boxes.

“So uh, this is the bedroom. The master bedroom–the one I sleep in,” he told her in a rush.

“I...see.”

“Yeah. Obviously the bed’s already set up. I told the movers that was the first thing they had to do, ‘cause, well, where the hell would I sleep, right?”

“Right.”

“Yeah. Right. Through that door is the bathroom. I told Cid that was a requirement because when—uh, sometimes I get up in the middle of the night, to go to the bathroom,” he stumbled.

Quistis turned and looked up at him. “You never get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom; you sleep like a brick.”

He stared down at her and clenched his jaw before glancing away, which surprised her. It was obvious that he was feeling nervous—or at least, as nervous as _Seifer_ could be. He kept rambling, and rubbing the back of his neck, and he’d changed conversation topics roughly three times in the past ten minutes.

“Seifer...what’s wrong?” she asked. “If you didn’t want to show me the house, you could’ve said so. I would’ve understood. I showed up without warning, and—”

Seifer interrupted her with a firm shake of his head. “No, it’s not that. I _did_ want to show you the house, but I wanted to show it to you finished. Like, all set up and shit.” He glanced away for a brief second, before he met her gaze again. “And if I tell you the real reason I’m acting like Puberty Boy, you’ll probably kick me in the balls.”

At that, a loud laugh escaped Quistis and she clapped her hand over her mouth, surprised at her sudden outburst. “Sorry, I...I don’t think I’d ever kick you in the _balls_. Even when we...I don’t know, I guess you could call it ‘breaking up’...even then I didn’t want to.”

Suddenly, his words played through her head again and she reached out, grabbing the sleeve of his sweater to get his attention. “Wait, you said you wanted to show it to me _finished_. Does that mean that you were planning on, well, _seeing_ me again?”

Just like before, he rubbed the back of his neck. He let out a loud sigh and admitted, “Yeah. I was planning on heading back to Garden in like a week.”

“Oh…”

“Yeah, _oh_. Imagine my reaction when Fujin told me you were standing at the end of the street.”

“I don’t understand,” she said, with a shake of her head. “Why wouldn’t you call and let me know? I haven’t heard from you _once_ , for the past three months.”

“I know, I—” He broke off and let out a long sigh. “I just wasn’t ready yet. I know that’s a shitty thing to say, and a cop out, but...I had to be ready before seeing you again.”

“Don’t you think that was a little unfair to me? I had no idea if you were okay, and it would’ve been nice to know _something_. Don’t you think I deserved at least that?”

He clenched his jaw and avoided eye contact again, which just ended up irritating Quistis. “Seifer, stop doing that. Just come right out and say it, for Hyne’s sake.”

“Shit, have you ever realized how bossy you are?”

“ _Bossy_? Do you honestly want to argue right now? And why would I kick you in the balls if you told me why you’re acting strange?”

He held up his hands in goodwill, conceding to her this time, and replied, “No, sorry, I—I can’t look at you without giving it away. Although I would’ve thought it would be obvious by now.”

“What would be obvious?”

“You promise not to punch me? Or, you know, kick me in the balls?”

“...I can’t promise that without knowing what it is you’re going to do, Seifer.”

Finally, he met her gaze, and she was surprised to see the intensity in his eyes. He glanced at the door before striding over to it and shutting it with a loud bang. She started at the sound, and when he walked back over to stand in front of her again, he held his hands out to the side as he crept closer, as if he were afraid to spook her.

When he stood just in front of her, he reached down and grabbed her hand, caressing her fingers gently before he held it in his own. She glanced down at their joined hands, and as much as she tried to fight it, her eyes fluttered at the warmth of his skin—warmth that she hadn’t felt in far too long. It was familiar to her, and yet strange, all at the same time. She knew the callouses of his palm as well as she knew the pale freckles on her upper shoulders, and yet, it was like she was discovering his touch for the first time all over again.

He lifted her hand to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to the inside of her wrist, which elicited a traitorous gasp from her. He grinned at the sound, and then slowly, lowered her hand. She thought he was just going to drop their hands to his side, but instead, he continued to lower it down the front of his body. When their hands were right in front of his groin, he turned her hand and pressed it gently against his semi-hardened member.

Her eyes shot up to his in surprise. They’d been doing nothing but talking the entire time, and never once had she indicated that she’d come here for a _physical_ reconnection. A low chuckle escaped him, and he said, “What can I say? When you’re pissed at me, it’s kind of a turn on.”

She rolled her eyes and mumbled, “I don’t even know what to say to that, other than that it seems highly inappropriate.”

That elicited another laugh from him and, sensing her reticence, he let go of her hand, giving her control over the situation. In a way, she could see how he’d become aroused. Anger fueled desire more often than not, especially in their case. Since they hadn’t spoken in the past three months, that passion had built and built, with nowhere to go.

Though her desire was building, at the same time, she felt held back by the knowledge that they still had so much to talk about, and it was then that she pulled away. Instead of backing away completely, she ghosted her fingers up his abdomen, tracing the line of his abs. Once she moved her hands past his chest, she wrapped her arms around his neck and absentmindedly toyed with the fine ends of his hair. None too gently, she tugged on the strands and he winced, staring down at her in confusion.

With a twitch of her eyebrow, in a low voice, she said, “Even if this happens...we still need to talk. You _know_ that, Seifer.”

Slowly, he reached up and cradled her face, running his thumbs along the high ridge of her cheekbones. “Yeah, I know that. But you gotta admit that I’m much likelier to be willing to talk _after_ wards.”

Figuring it wouldn’t hurt to at least take care of one thing first, Quistis simpered. “So long as you know that you’re not getting out of it, even if I do say yes,” she murmured.

At a leisurely place, he lowered his head, his heavy-lidded eyes focused on her lips. When he was but a centimeter from touching her, he brushed his lips against hers, as if asking for permission. Sick of his sudden bout of chivalry, she reached up and closed the miniscule distance between them, tracing her tongue along the seam of his lips like he’d done to her, the first time they’d ever kissed.

Unlike her, he didn’t hesitate, and he quickly opened his mouth to let her in, sweeping his hand around to the back of her neck to cradle her head. He reached upwards and pulled the clip out of her hair, wasting no time in running his fingers through the now loose strands of flaxen gold. With every stroke of his tongue, her body responded in kind, and the taut coil of need that had been intensifying in her lower abdomen tightened even further.

A sudden wave of desperation hit her then, and she reached down to fumble with the snap of his jeans. He chuckled against her lips and pulled back, draping his hands over hers. “Stop, Quistis...stop. We don’t have to rush this.”

“It’s been three months, Seifer.”

That wrung another laugh out of him, and he replied, “Trust me, I _know_. But let’s try and take it slow, okay?”

With an impatient sigh, she let go of the button and placed her hands on Seifer’s forearms. “Fine. Why don’t you lead then, mister ‘let’s take it slow’,” she teased in a low, sultry voice.

He let out a long, tortured groan, and pulled her backwards with him towards the bed. “You’re not planning on lettin’ me live that down, are you?”

A slow smile spread across her face and when he laid back on the comforter, she casually climbed over him, straddling his hips. She leaned down to kiss him, and her loose hair fell around her neck, draping across his face. The ends dusted against his cheeks like a quiet, sultry whisper, and he let out another groan that sounded almost pained; his hips bucked upwards, and his now fully erect member brushed against her core, causing her to respond with a breathless gasp.

Desperate with the need to feel his hands on her skin, she sat up and quickly yanked her hoodie off. With an almost shy smile, she grabbed his hands and placed them on her sides, so that he was cradling her thin frame in his grasp. Though he’d never been overly receptive to authority, he wasn’t one to say no to her taking charge in bed. So with a wry grin, he traced his hands upwards along her skin until they rested just under her breasts. A few seconds later, he reached up and brushed his thumbs over her nipples. The material of her sports bra was thin enough that she could still feel it, and she gasped at the sensation, arching her back and pressing her breasts further into his hands.

Without warning, Seifer wrapped his arm around her waist, flipping them over so that he was now laying on top of her. Quistis raised her eyebrow at him and he quirked his head to the side. “I like to hear you moan for me,” he murmured, before slowly moving down her body.

“I already knew that,” she replied, running her fingers through his hair as he ghosted kisses down her abdomen. He swirled his tongue around her navel, and she squirmed at the sensation that was both ticklish and arousing at the same time.

Seifer chuckled at her reaction, and the light puffs of his breath against her hip bones caused her to shiver. “Oh, did you?” he asked, hooking his fingers underneath her waistband before slowly pulling her pants down.

“...Yes...I did…” she whispered, tense with anticipation.

“Hm, “ he hummed as he tossed them aside, and grazed the tip of his nose along the band of her underwear. After pushing himself up a little, he bit the lacy fabric and, at an even slower place than when he’d pulled her pants off, dragged it down her hips.

She lifted her body off of the bed for him, and he pulled them the rest of the way off before tossing them into the corner with her pants.

“What are you up to, Seifer?” she asked coyly, her normally pale irises darkened with lust.

His only response was a smirk as he spread her legs apart and draped her right leg over his shoulder, hooking his arm underneath her left leg before leaning down. She tensed and tightened her fingers in his hair. In a more serious tone of voice, Quistis questioned, “Seifer... _what_ are you doing?”

“Shh, you ask too many questions, Quis. If you _really_ have to know,” he murmured, before placing a kiss on her inner thigh and spreading her lower lips open before him. “I _love_ it when you moan for me.”

Quistis lifted her head to see what exactly he meant, but when the slightly rough, wet, and very unexpected texture of his tongue snaked along her slit, her head fell back onto the pillow with a sharp gasp. The feeling of his tongue on her most private, sensitive area, sent a flood of heated desire shooting straight to her core. She felt him chuckle before he circled her clit with the tip of his tongue, which elicited another gasp from her that quickly morphed into a moan.

He repeated this motion a few more times before moving lower. Her body knew what he was planning to do before her mind caught up, and when his tongue speared into her, she tightened her grip on his hair. She must’ve pulled harder than she realized, because he grunted, and the sound reverberated through her core. When he licked her again, she subconsciously tightened her thighs around his head, wanting, _needing_ more.

“Seifer, please,” she gasped.

Another chuckle left him, tickling her lower lips, and he pulled back to ask, “Please what?”

Frustrated, she exhaled sharply and tossed her head to the side, before looking down at him. “Don’t make me beg.”

“Hey, you’re the one who said ‘please’.”

“Seifer!”

He climbed up her body and pecked her on the lips. “All right, all right. Like I said: bossy.”

Exuding pure confidence in a way that only he could, he lifted the hem of his sweater, pausing right before he revealed each row of his rippled abdomen in order to tease her. She huffed impatiently and decided to take matters into her own hands, reaching up and rubbing his hard length.

He moaned while his sweater was covering his face, and impatiently, she grabbed his member firmly in her hand. It did the trick, because he yanked off his sweater and immediately leaned down to capture her lips again. She moaned at his frenzied response, raking her nails down his muscular back. Her forward actions spurred him on, and he laid a heavy hand on her sex, pressing the heel of his palm against her clit and rubbing it in time with his tongue’s motions.

Breathless, Quistis broke their kiss and, in his ear, gasped, “Seifer, now. _Please_.”

She felt him nod in agreement, and he reeled back, hastily unbuttoning his jeans before he kicked them onto the ground. In one smooth motion, he entered her, and they both cried out at the sudden pleasure that overtook them.

He pulled out and, much to her frustration, didn’t enter her again right away. When she tried to lift her hips to close the distance between them, he moved back even farther and she glared up at him. “What the _hell_?”

A strained chuckle left him and he kissed the underside of her jaw. “This is going to sound cheesy as fuck, but, I don’t think I’ve ever said this to you. Like, actually said it.”

“Said _what_?” Quistis pressed, desperate for him to get back to it.

Tenderly, he brushed one of her bangs away from her face and caressed her cheek with his thumb. The look in his eyes should’ve indicated to her what he was about to say, but her vision was clouded by heady lust, and as a result, his next words completely blindsided her.

“I love you, Quistis.”

Her mouth dropped open in surprise and, of course, it was then that he thrust back into her. Caught off guard by the overwhelming wave of pleasure that spread through her, she let out a strangled sound that was somewhere between a desperate moan and a gasp. He’d snuck his hands underneath her ass and lifted her hips, hitting her at just the right angle to make her cry out in intense pleasure.

The gravity of what he’d said escaped her as he continued to drive into her. Each time his hips met hers, the tension within her built, and her grip on his arms tightened. He ducked his head to the side of hers, alternating between nuzzling her neck with his nose, and nipping the thin skin with his teeth. With every lunge, his breath escaped him in a harsh burst and tickled her ear. Somehow, it was the only sound she could concentrate on, and the entire world fell away.

All she could hear, all she could feel, all she _knew_ , was Seifer.

Like the slow rise of the sun during her early morning runs, the love she felt for him radiated outwards from the middle of her chest, threatening to consume her whole. Every subsequent movement of his hips caused the flame to burn brighter, and with the last thrust, the tension in her finally snapped. She cried out and dug her fingernails into his upper arms, throwing her head back as she rode the wave of sheer pleasure that washed over her.

What felt like minutes later, she opened her eyes again and saw that he was hovering over her, watching her with a masculine grin of pride. She rolled her eyes, and he snickered—obviously not apologetic in the slightest—before pulling out of her once more. Confused, she trailed her hand down his arm as he backed away, wondering why he didn’t just finish with her.

“Come here,” Seifer instructed, climbing off of the bed. His arousal was still standing proudly at attention, and she couldn’t help herself from looking at it, admiring his undeniable virility. Another chuckle left him, but this one was deeper, tainted with obvious desire.

When Quistis scooted off the bed, he pushed against her side, and she flipped over, acquiescing to his request. He lifted her higher on the mattress and pressed up against her, causing her inner muscles to clench in anticipation, despite the fact that she’d just reached her peak.

Slowly, he pushed into her again, stretching her more in this position than he ever had before. She let out a breathless gasp, fighting to catch her breath as he filled her completely. He leaned down and rested his hands beside her head, and his weight threatened to crush her, though it wasn’t unpleasant in the slightest. It almost served as a reminder of how much he’d taken over her life, her soul. It made her realize how much she now wanted him, _needed_ him—not only in this way, but in every way.

She wanted to sit on that window seat and watch the sunset with his arms around her; she wanted to burn their dinner in that kitchen, and hear him reprimanding her for “not having enough womanly skills”; she wanted to feel his reassuring weight beside her, in this bed, for the rest of their lives. Damn it all, damn _him_. Despite how angry she was over their last argument, she still wanted all of that and more.

As he continued to stroke her inner walls, the telltale fluttering of her muscles started again, and she wrapped her fingers around his wrist. With each thrust, she gripped him tighter, and this time, he was going to join her in climaxing; she knew that, because he leaned down and nipped the top of her ear, grunting hard with every motion of his hips.

Just like the last one, her orgasm caught her off guard, and she threw her head back, letting out a loud moan. The feeling of her muscles squeezing him tightly must’ve brought him to the pinnacle of his pleasure because finally, he let out a strained groan and stiffened, his hips jerking as he released in her. She sighed in delight at the feeling of that emotional connection that was impossible to obtain in any other way.

When he’d recovered, he pulled out and grabbed the closest piece of clothing he could find, wiping the evidence of the past hour from her thighs. After tossing his sweater aside, he scooped her up in his arms and laid her down on the other side of the bed. Once he’d climbed on top, he pulled the blanket over them.

She pulled his arm over her stomach, missing the comforting, reassuring weight of him. He nuzzled her neck and settled in, falling asleep within seconds. A scoff left her and she looked at him out of the corner of her eye.

“Such a guy...falling asleep and avoiding the ‘talk’…” she whispered, letting her eyes drift shut as well.

* * *

 An hour later, he woke her up and pulled her on top of him, thrusting into her again in one fluid motion. It was as if he was planning on making up for the past three months in the span of one night. Within twenty minutes, he had her gasping through her third climax of the night.

Over the rest of the daylight hours, they talked intermittently between making up for lost time. For the most part though, they let their bodies speak. Every time she tried to broach the conversation that was hanging over them, he kissed her to silence her, and they’d be at it again. He was stalling and, to be honest, she didn’t blame him. Sex fixed some things, but not everything, and she knew that soon, they’d have to get it all out in the open.

By the time the sun began to sink below the horizon, they still hadn’t talked about anything serious. When he reached for her again, she pushed his arm away and said, “Seifer, I can’t, I’m sorry. I feel like a limp noodle. If you want to keep going, I need some food in me.”

“What, can’t keep up, Trepe? You gettin’ old on me?” he teased, nuzzling her nose with the tip of his.

She scoffed. “I’m two months older than you.”

“Two and a _half_ ,” he corrected, crawling off the bed and pulling his jeans on once he was standing.

He bent down and scooped up her clothes, handing them over to her afterwards. Struck with the sudden desire to be connected to him in some way still, she scooted off the bed and grabbed his sweater instead, tugging it over her head. It hit her about mid-thigh and she pulled his sleeves down so that they covered her hands.

Unexpectedly, he let out a sharp laugh and, offended, she glared up at him. “What’s so funny?”

“I just...I never thought I’d see you with sex hair, wearing my oversized sweater, standing in my house,” he replied softly, a thoughtful look on his face. “I dunno, it’s cute.”

“Well, I never thought I’d hear you say _cute_ so...fair’s fair.” She spun around, opening the door to walk out into the hallway.

From behind her, she heard him chuckle. They stomped down the stairs, and when she felt his fingertips graze the back of her thigh, an inexplicable surge of giddiness took over. With a burst of speed, she squealed and raced down the stairs, using her momentum to swing her around the balustrade. He chased after her, and when they passed under the archway leading into the kitchen, he tugged her backwards, swinging her around to push her against the counter.

Their laughter faded into soft breaths as he kissed her, and when he pulled away, he softly traced his fingers along her jaw. “Feed you, right?” he mumbled.

Quistis nodded as a smile teased at the corners of her lips. With a sigh, Seifer turned and started rummaging through some boxes. A minute or so later, he pulled a pizza box off of the floor, and she raised an eyebrow at him. “Classy.”

“Well, I just started moving in today. If you expected anything other than stale pizza, that’s your own damn fault,” he quipped.

She laughed and said, “I wouldn’t have expected anything else from you.” When he looked up at her, she added, “I mean that in the most positive way possible.”

“Sure,” he replied with a grin, handing her a tin-foil wrapped slice of pizza.

“Wow, you even wrapped it?”

“Nah, that was Fujin. Said I’d get ants, or stain shit, or something.”

While she unwrapped the pizza, she asked, “Speaking of which, where did she and Raijin go?”

Seifer leaned against the counter and crossed his arms. “As soon as you started moaning, they probably ran for the hills. I don’t think they’d wanna stick around and hear us going at it like animals.”

“Good point,” she mumbled into her food, blushing slightly.

At her reaction, he laughed again. Once the sound died down, she stared down at her pizza, thinking about how to bring up the past three months; it was time, she could feel it. He couldn’t stall anymore, and it was likely that he understood that as well. Even though their romps in bed had cleared the air of any awkward tension, it unfortunately didn’t remove the fact that they had things to discuss.

After she swallowed her bite, she looked up at him with a serious expression. He glanced at the floor before meeting her gaze again, and let out a sigh. “You want to have that talk, don’t you?”

“Don’t you think we need to?”

“I know _you_ want to, so...yeah. I guess so.”

She set the crust down on the countertop behind her—she hated pizza crust; something about the stale chewiness bothered her—and crossed her arms, mirroring his position. Not the best body posture to take, considering the nature of their impending conversation, but she couldn’t help it.

“Where have you been the last three months?”

“On leave.”

“I knew _that_. I’m asking where.”

He let out another sigh and gazed out the window. A few seconds passed before he replied, “At the orphanage.”

“The _orphanage_? Why?” she asked, with a shake of her head.

With a shrug,  he explained, “I don’t really know. I just needed a place to...clear my head; get some shit off of my mind, some weight off of my shoulders, you know? Matron suggested I head to Centra because obviously, there ain’t anyone there, and...that’s where I ended up staying for two months.”

“But I haven’t seen you for three months—or, _at least_ three. Slightly more, I think.”

“Yeah, I was in Centra for two months. I headed to Esthar for a couple of weeks, then stopped by Deling for another, then headed back here.”

“Wait, so, you’ve been back in Balamb for the past week?” she demanded, her indignation rising again.

“Something like that, yeah.”

“Then why didn’t you come back to Garden? Why didn’t you at least _call me_? Let me know that you were back?”

“I had some shit to take care of. This house was one of them.”

“This house? Doesn’t Cid pay for you to stay here? I’m sorry, I just...I don’t see how that’s important.”

“Well, it just is,” he stated, obviously wanting to remain tight-lipped about that particular subject. Well, that was fine with Quistis, so long as he understood that by the end of this conversation, she _would_ find out the reason why.

“Okay, we’ll come back to that in a second,” she stated. Brushing past him, she moved into the living room and sank down on the floor in front of the fireplace. After she patted the patch of floor across from her, he pushed off of the wall and walked over to her, sitting down where she’d indicated.

“Tell me about Centra, and why you were gone so long,” she pressed, albeit in a quiet voice.

Again, he shrugged. He stayed silent for a little while, and eventually, Quistis sighed. “Seifer, you’ve got to trust me enough to talk to me. I’m upset that you were gone for so long, and didn’t even bother to contact me, but…I’m at least willing to hear you out on _why_.”

Seifer leaned back and braced his weight on his palms. He let out a long exhale, and it was then that he began talking. “After the last time we talked, I just—there was a lot I had to work through. Everything during the mission...Chickenwuss...just, a lot of shit was bothering me.”

“I can understand that,” Quistis encouraged.

“I _know_ you do, and that’s why I had to get away from you; from Balamb, from everything I’d been around for the past year or two. I couldn’t fuckin’ think with everything around me and...shit, I don’t know.” He sat up and ran his hand down his face. “It was just too much.”

She gazed into his eyes and eventually, he shook his head. “Mostly I just thought about when we were kids—or at least, as much as I could remember. Hyne, I was a dick to Zell. When he showed up in Esthar, I was still a dick but, I didn’t do it to make the guy’s life a living hell. I just did it because...it was all I’d known, it was all I’d ever done. By that point, it was just the way shit was between us.”

“Zell knew that, Seifer,” she reassured him. It surprised her that she even needed to reassure Seifer about Zell at all. Naturally, the martial artist would’ve been on Seifer’s mind. How could he not be? But she’d never imagined that her friend’s death would haunt him so much that he had to leave Balamb, just to get away from the source of so many memories. It put the last few months into perspective, and now, she found that she was much more willing to listen to what Seifer had to say.

“Yeah, I know he did. He didn’t get as pissed as he used to, and I think somehow, he knew I didn’t want to punch his lights out anymore. Besides, he’d knock me flat on my ass in two seconds. Or...he would’ve…” he trailed off. “Plus, I told him as much.”

“You told him?” Quistis echoed, confused at Seifer’s word choice. If he’d been in a coma for three weeks after Zell’s death, when could he have possibly told Zell any of that?

“Yeah. I visited his memorial before I left.” He gazed up at the ceiling, lost in his memory of that day.

* * *

_Two and a half months ago._

_Seifer grabbed his coat from the end of the bed and draped it across his forearm, gazing around the infirmary for any of his belongings that he might’ve forgotten. That morning, Dr. Kadowaki had officially cleared him to get back to work, and he didn’t see any reason to stick around the Garden. Not now, when he hadn’t seen Quistis since their heated exchange, which had been about a month ago._

_Clearly, she didn’t care enough to say goodbye, or even to visit him while he’d been healing. So why would he stay? Why would he even bother to find her?_

_He headed for the door, nodding his thanks to Dr. Kadowaki and lifting his coat in a goodbye. She stood as he passed, and said, “Take care of yourself, Seifer. I don’t want to see you back in this room again, anytime soon.”_

_Her only response from him was a chuckle, and the door slid shut behind him._

_As he made his way through the lobby, he passed a gaggle of new cadets, and their whispers circled around him. The sound of their gossip made him realize that he didn’t miss Garden as much as he thought he would._

_After the war, he’d gone through so many different phases of acceptance. At first, he’d desperately wanted another chance to prove his worth, and had been so tempted to return to Garden to apply to become a SeeD again. However, by that point, he was far too old, and that desire burned out within a month. The next phase was anger, and he’d been so pissed at Cid, at Matron, at himself, at his friends...everything. Last came the sense of listlessness; he was so sick and tired of just floating on other people’s generosity. He wanted some sense of purpose, of stability, in his life. He’d made some shitty decisions, but he wagered that he deserved at least that much._

_When Cid had approached him that day in Balamb, offering him the chance to return and yet, not entirely in the way he’d originally hoped to, he’d surprised himself by accepting. The old man was offering him that stability he so craved by that point, and he couldn’t think of a good reason to say no._

_It was to Cid’s office that he now headed, to let him know that he was cleared for the field and that he’d be returning to the rental house in Balamb, where he’d await his next orders. It wasn’t likely that they’d come anytime soon, which, considering how much his body had needed to heal over the past couple of months, was probably a good thing. Three missions in the last three years wasn’t very much—far less than Quistis had, that was for damn sure—and for once, he was glad of it._

_When the elevator dinged on the third floor, Seifer meandered into Cid’s office, where the Headmaster was sitting behind his desk. He’d told Cid how he wanted to use the leave he’d been building up. When the Headmaster had questioned why, his only response was that he needed time away to think about everything, just time to process the last few months of his life. Matron had nodded understandingly, and encouraged her husband to grant Seifer’s request._

_Anyone who knew the couple understood that once Matron suggested something, Cid would agree. So, per Seifer’s request, he was granted indefinite leave, welcome to return to work whenever he felt ready. Before he walked out the door, Matron had said, ”Take as long as you need, Seifer.”_

_He’d had every intention of just walking out that door and not thinking about Quistis, or Garden, or the Esthar mission, for as long as possible. However, when he stepped off the last stair in front of the elevator, his eyes had wandered over the quad. Despite the fact that he was surrounded by cadets running to their destinations, he stood there in the middle of the lobby, staring at the quad’s entrance._

_A month ago, Quistis had mentioned that an addition to the memorial had been made in Zell’s honor. When he’d woken up this morning, his plan had been to speak to Cid, then hightail it outta there. Now, though, as he stared at the quad, he realized that if he left without seeing Zell, he wouldn’t be able to leave this all behind._

_So, with a new goal in mind, he headed for the quad._

_In the early hours of the day, there wasn’t much action in the quad, and he was relieved to find it so deserted. There was no way that this conversation wouldn’t be emotional, and he preferred conducting it in a bit of privacy. In a large military facility like Balamb Garden, privacy was hard to come by, so he thanked Hyne for this opportunity. He’d never been religious, but since the end of the mission, he found himself praying to Hyne a lot more than he had in the past._

_There, at the end of the room, he saw it: the tall, glittering obelisk rose higher than the others that surrounded it, seemingly reaching for the heavens above. It was the purest shade of white he’d ever seen, with hints of silver sparkles interspersed through the stone. He knew it was Zell’s because the others showed the wearing of time and love; the rounded corners and smudge marks were indicators that those stones had regular visitors. Zell’s stone was pristine, shining where it caught the sunlight._

_Seifer approached it, his hands in his pockets. When he stood in front of it, he came to a halt, staring at the words etched on the face._

“In loving memory of Zell Dincht. Dear friend to many, loyal SeeD, and the bravest of us all.”

_The corner of Seifer’s mouth twitched upwards at the realization that, of all the people he knew, Zell was likely the one who deserved such words the most. There had been this inherent goodness about the kid, and he thought that perhaps that was one of the reasons he’d always bullied him. It was similar to the reason he’d always picked on Squall, too. He’d tried to break them, make them see the harsh realities of the real world. The sad irony of it was that Zell, before him, found that out in the hardest way possible._

_As his eyes traced the lines and corners of the letters, he felt his throat close up with emotion. I’m not gonna cry like some Hyne-damned pussy…_

_Squeezing his eyes shut, he blocked out the sight of Zell’s memorial, fighting to clear his head. When he had himself under control, he opened his eyes once more. He couldn’t help himself from looking at the stone again, though, and hesitantly, he reached out to touch it._

_What Zell had done for him, for him and Quistis, was something he could never thank the kid for. Instead, he’d gone and fucked it up, and now, they weren’t even speaking to each other. Guilt swept over him and he traced his fingers along the letters, kicking himself mentally for being such a dick all the time. The worst part of that was that he never_ tried _to be a dick—it just happened._

_A long sigh left him, and he let his fingers drop. He glanced over his shoulder, checking if he was alone in the quad. When he saw that he was, he tossed his jacket to the floor and stepped closer to the stone, pressing his forehead against the cold granite._

_“Shit, Dincht. Why’d you have to go and die for me?” he whispered, squeezing his eyes shut again._

_Like he’d told Quistis, the thought of Zell’s blood on his conscience nearly tore him apart. It was all he thought of, every day, all night. It haunted him, the knowledge that someone as pure and kindhearted as Zell, had died for someone as shitty and undeserving as him. In his mind, he apologized for all the times he’d been a complete asshole to Zell; he apologized for when they were children and he stuck bugs in Zell’s shoes constantly, he apologized for when they’d been cadets and he constantly undermined Zell’s masculinity—just to embarrass the kid. He also apologized for teasing him in Esthar, even though he hadn’t meant it in the same way he had when they were younger. Now, he knew there was no way to fix the past, but at least he could say he was sorry—and mean it. That, in and of itself, was an uncharacteristic gesture, considering Seifer never apologized for anything._

_“What’s done is done, I guess,” he said, straightening again. “I can’t ever pay you back for this, but I swear to you, Zell, after I get my shit straight, I’ll try for her again. There’s a lot I gotta do first, but, I owe it to you to at least try.”_

_He bent down and grabbed his jacket, taking a step back from the memorial. The ray of light that filtered in through the window shifted, and when it hit the etched words, it framed the sentence in such a way where the stone appeared to be glittering beneath the letters. After a few seconds, the sun moved, and the moment was over._

_Seifer took that as a sign, as Zell’s response that he’d accepted his promise, and his apology. Briefly, he touched the stone again before waving once at the memorial, murmuring, “See you later, Chickenwuss,” and walked out of the quad._

* * *

Quistis swallowed down the lump in her throat at Seifer’s recollection. She had no idea that he’d visited Zell’s memorial, and the fact that he had, just to apologize, meant more to her than anything.

After a few seconds, Seifer continued. Now that she’d prompted him to talk, it was as if he couldn’t stop, like he was anxious to get everything off of his chest. “Anyway, like I said, most of my time at the orphanage was spent sitting on the beach and thinkin’ about shit. Eventually, my thoughts changed from thinking about the past, to thinking about the mission, to thinking about the day he died.”

Unable to handle the emotion on his face, she looked down at her hands in her lap. His voice filled the room, echoing back to her from the walls. “Your words stayed with me, you know. When you told me that he’d died for us, so that we could be happy. For the first couple of weeks that I was there, I had the hardest time with that. I just couldn’t get why he’d do something like that—for _me_ , of all people. He hated my guts for the first twenty years of his life, you know? Why the hell would he take a fuckin’ bullet for me? Or, you know what I mean.”

Without looking up at him, she mumbled, “Because that was just the type of person he was.”

“See, and it’s _that right there_. Why would someone as _good_ as Zell, throw his whole fuckin’ life away for _me_? And I know I said that to you, that day, in the infirmary. I still don’t fully get it, but I get now that he just...he wanted me to try again. That’s what it all was for. He wanted me to not fuck this up—not fuck _us_ up—and I can’t ignore that. I can’t, Quistis. I promised him I wouldn’t. Plus, even if he hadn’t done that, I would’ve still wanted you more than anything I’ve ever wanted in my pathetic fuckin’ life. But now? I’d be an idiot to keep pushing you away because I didn’t think I deserved you.”

At that, Quistis snapped her head up and she narrowed her eyes at him. “It isn’t a question of whether or not you _deserve_ me, Seifer. I’m not some paragon of perfection! I know that—”

He stood up on his knees and crawled over to her. When he rocked back onto his calves in front of her, he stated, “Woah, woah, I know that, Quistis. You’re _not_ fuckin’ perfect, you never have been. You get pissed like the rest of us, make mistakes like the rest of us, and the sun doesn’t shine out of your ass. I’ve seen it, I know.”

“Wait, are you supposed to be sweeping me off of my feet, apologizing, or making me want to punch you?”

“Stay with me here, Quistis. It’s two out of three of those. You’re not perfect, and fuck me, but that’s what I love about you,” he admitted. Looking up at the ceiling thoughtfully, he mumbled, “Now that I’ve said that, it’s a hell of a lot easier to say again.”

She tried to contain her smile and he nicked her chin with his fingers. “Your smile is the most Hyne-damned beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. Your laugh is infectious, and the way it lights up your eyes is just…I don’t think I could compliment your body without getting hard again, so we’ll just stick with...it’s fuckin’ amazing. But it’s all that shit, and the fact that you’re not perfect,  _makes_ you perfect. You get that, right? You get why I’d feel like I don’t deserve you?

“I mean, look at me. Never made SeeD, fucked my own life over by becoming a Sorceress’ Knight for the wrong bitch, never knew where else to go so I ended up staying in Balamb like a lost puppy, and somehow? Even after all that, I got to be with _you_?”

Tears welled in Quistis’ eyes. No, he wasn’t the most eloquent individual. He never had been, and he likely never would be. But there was a level of sincerity in his tone that no one else could ever hope to achieve, and she knew that he meant every word he’d said. In his own coarse, unrefined way, he’d basically told her that he didn’t think he’d ever find anyone like her again, and what girl didn’t want to hear why the man she loved, loved her?

His explanation had also served its purpose: she was no longer angry that he’d disappeared from Balamb, from her life. Because she understood exactly why he’d done it. It wasn’t as if she’d reached out to _him_ , either, after all.

“So how did that epiphany lead you to Esthar and Deling?” she asked, once her emotions were back in check.

He fell back onto his butt and crossed his legs underneath him. “Well, Esthar has some of the best technology. I’m not a SeeD, but I’m not an idiot, either. The house needed some top of the line security shit. Deling has some of the best interior decorators, and that’s where Fujin and Raijin had gone after I left for the mission in Esthar. It’s also where I kept all of my earnings from the past three years, and I had to withdraw most of it to buy this heap of junk. I love this damn house, but don’t ask me why, because it needs a _shit_ ton of work.”

“I didn’t think it looked that bad,” she noted, glancing up at the ceiling. A slight, hairline crack ran across the width of the room, but it didn’t look too serious.

“That’s because you haven’t looked closely enough. Anyway, pulled out the money, came back, bought the house. Told Cid I’d be stationed here for good and uh...then you showed up on moving day.” He rubbed the back of his neck when he finished talking and glanced up at her with the most hopeful expression she’d ever seen on his face.

“So...you said earlier that you’d planned on seeing me again, after the house was finished. What did you mean by that?” Quistis asked, feeling like her heart was lodged in her throat.

Seifer stared at her, his turquoise eyes piercing in the dying light of the evening. “Why the hell else would I buy a house, Quistis?”

“...I don’t know. That’s why I asked,” she whispered.

He continued to stare into her eyes, and the lack of response was torture. Slowly, he rose to his feet and held his hand out to her. With an unsure glance at his face, she placed her hand in his open palm, and he pulled her up to stand in front of him. Without letting go of her hand, he led her out of the living room and back up the stairs, not stopping once he reached the landing. He rounded the banister and headed back for the bedroom.

Bewildered, she chose not to say anything and just see what he had planned. When they were standing near the bed and the pile of boxes beside it, he let go of her hand and bent down in front of the smaller box by his left foot. After popping it open, he rummaged around until he found what he was looking for, tucking it into his closed fist before facing her.

Quistis raised her eyebrows in a silent question and with a deep sigh, he held out his hand, palm up, fingers uncurled. In his hand was a brass, vintage key with a floral design along the head. When the realization of what he was offering hit her, she gasped, covering her mouth with her hand.

Seifer would never be the roses and wine type, and she’d always known that. But somehow, his own brand of romanticism meant just as much, if not more. The fact that he’d chosen to ask her to be a part of his life—for however long people in their profession might live—by buying a house near Garden, near everything she’d grown up loving, near her friends, meant more than any words could convey in that moment.

She looked up into his eyes, and he offered a nervous laugh before lifting her hand and placing the key in it. After closing her fingers around it, he said, “I bought it because I wanted to share it with you, damn it. You movin’ in or not?”

That caused her to laugh, and after wiping away a stray tear that had escaped from being overwhelmed by sheer emotion, she stood up on her toes and wrapped her arms around his neck.

Taking that as a yes, he laughed, and it was much more confident than the one before. He responded in kind by winding his arms around her waist, pulling her flush against his body. When he burrowed his nose in her hair, embracing her so tightly that it felt like her ribs might break, she sighed in true happiness—happiness that, less than a year ago, she never thought she’d have.

When she’d seen him that day in the bar, she never could’ve imagined in her wildest dreams that they’d be here now, standing in the house he’d bought with the intention of sharing it with her. She never could’ve guessed that she’d fall in love with _Seifer Almasy_ , and that Hyne forbid, he’d fall in love with her, too; that he’d always, in his own unique way, loved her.

He’d brought out the best and the worst in her, and she was sure that if she asked him, he’d say the same about her. Yet somehow, despite their extremely rough downs, their ups were more amazing than anything she could’ve hoped or prayed for. And maybe, that was what truly made love, love.

It was rare for people to be able to look back on their lives, and think, “This is exactly what I should have done. This is where I expected to go.” By no means did Quistis consider herself in that unusual group of people. When she _did_ look back on the past nine months, her life had been this incredible and completely unexpected turn of events that just continued to spiral in every which direction; however, where it had brought her in the end was a place that she couldn’t regret coming to. After all, she was here with Seifer, and they had Zell to thank for that.

With that thought, she turned her head and traced her lips along the outer shell of his ear. When he inhaled sharply at the sensation, she whispered, “Of course I’m moving in. Did you even have to ask?”

Then, quietly, she added, “And by the way, I love you too.”

****  
  
  


**The End.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I started writing Black Swan, back in May of this year, I never would've thought it would reach the place it has. It was only my second story for the fandom, and it had so many firsts for me as far as my fanfiction writing "career" went. I feel like I've grown with Seifer and Quistis, and learned so much, and even though this story is now complete, it will always have a really special place in my heart.
> 
> On that note, I wanted to thank each and every one of my readers. Whether you've left a comment/kudos or not, just the fact that you've taken the time to read a story that ended at well over a hundred thousand words means so much to me. To know that something so important and dear to me, meant something to you, is that wonderful writer/reader relationship that's so special. So thank you to all of you for inspiring me to actually finish this story.
> 
> In addition to that, this story would not be where it is today without my beta readers. Arenoptara and LaylaEvercrest have been there every chapter, every draft, and it's with their help that you guys get to read such refined and finished chapters. Strings805 came into the game a little later than they did, but his input was no less valuable and I thank you guys so, so much for your help (also, shoutout to StormyMonday for helping me with some really early rewrites).
> 
> I don't ever envision myself not writing for the fandom, so even though Black Swan is over, I'm sure I'll be returning soon enough. A bit of a self-plug, but I do have a Seiftis Regency Era AU that's ongoing, so if you feel the need for a lighter, fluffier story involving these two, there's always that ;)
> 
> Anyway, I'm just putting off the inevitable so, on that note...thanks again for reading :)


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